Our guest list is really my only stressor (that and our DJ screwing up somehow) and FI just doesn't seem to get it.
Our venue only holds 160. I worked very hard to get a seating arrangement that wouldn't be crowded with this amount. Better is 150.
We have 175 on our guest list, roughly half are his family that all live in Canada. We know at least 10-40 of these people will not come (10 for sure). We also know of a few local people that will not come. But as family and and dear friends, they will still receive an invitation (The Canada invites are already out, but no one in his family is rsvp-ing really).
So, we are at our limit. Period. Please, please, please dear future husband STOP adding names to the guest list!! And please stop telling/talking about the wedding to our colleagues who are not on the list (sigh).
And to further exasperate the issue, I have recently found out about a surprise bridal shower (which is the sweetest thing ever --truly, and no one knows that I know). He was contacted by the planners and did not bother to tell them/give the wedding list, so now women are invited to the surprise shower that are not on the list. I wrote more about it here: http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1017300/the-problem-with-surprise-showers#latest
But with my only two BMs out of state, some local friends put this together/hosting and invited other women in the blind. It is such a lovely gesture, but I know some feelings will get hurt. When they contacted FI, all he had to do was send the list. But instead when he got the list of shower invitees (non-wedding guests included), he just replied "looks good-I think you got everyone."
(FYI-found out about the surprise shower because my friend at work left her FB message page open on a public computer--oops. My name all over the page caught my eye, I wish I didn't know).
So sorry for my long post. I'm just frustrated. He is such a wonderful guy--happy go lucky. We have had no fights/arguments over this, but I do my best to explain the stress it causes me and how in the end people will be more upset if his behavior doesn't change. Of course, there is nothing I can do about the surprise shower. The invites for that are out. I guess I am just venting. Thanks for making it this far in my post...