Crying at work....

Couggal12 · May 2014

For the most part, I'm really laid back. I don't let my coworkers get me upset and I definitely have learned not to take anything personal my boss says or the Director of my department says to me when it comes to criticism. However, today I couldn't help it and I broke down and cried. I found out today that I have to have an MRI for my brain on Friday and I'm just worried/stressed about that and then all this work I've been doing for a project my boss needs was completely shut down, ripped apart and now I have to start over. Even though I thought I did a pretty good job at it and have asked tons of questions to make sure it was what her expectations were.

Ugh. I HATE crying in front of people and I'm just glad my boss did not see me. She's even said before she can't think of a single reason you would openly cry at work.

Does anyone else ever cry at work? Or have them in the past?

Cookie Pusher · May 2014

I've cried at almost every job I've had except for my current one. It was always a combination of very bad supervisors and equally obnoxious coworkers. I'm pretty good at articulating my thoughts but when I'm being threatened or verbally abused without being able to defend myself, I get so frustrated that tears just automatically come out. Hot, angry tears where normally swearing would be occurring.

erinlin25 · May 2014

sorry you having a bad day. Sounds like you have a lot of stress right now and I am sure the review at work was topping on the cake that caused you to break. If you are not someone who commonly cries in a work environment I am sure no one with think much of it and will realize something else is going on. Now would be a good time to fill your boss in on the outside stress going on. Not so you get special treatment or anything, but simply just to be in the loop of what is going on with you emotionally right now. The only time I broke down at work was when I put in my notice to leave. The stress leading up to that decision was hard for me so when talking to my boss I definitely broke down. It was just her in her office and she knew the amount of stress I was under. She did not think any differently of me and was very supportive with my transition moving. Crying is not always a sign of weakness, so I would not be too hard on yourself.

Do something for you today to get some R&R!

smalfrie19 · May 2014

At my very first corporate job I did. Frequently. I was there for 3 years and about a year and a half into, we got a lead that was awful to me and then after that the work load became to much for me to handle and I just couldn't take it anymore.

ETA: I also once had someone try to accuse me of sexual harassment (by showing a tattoo on my shoulder) and then when my BF (now FI) mentioned that I was turning 21 to this person (FI was 34 at the time) he made a comment about how it was "nice" and he was "robbing the cradle" ...Which I found incredible offensive and thought about reporting it to HR.

ETF: formatting

KGold80 · May 2014

The MRI shit alone would bring me to tears!

I have cried at work - because of being put through the ringer as a witness to some heavy interpersonal shit that I had no business being involved in, but someone decided that I was best suited to be the damned note taker to ensure that things were properly reported.

I have also cried tears of happiness because I am fortunate to work with some pretty amazing people who go out of their way to show they appreciate me.

I would think it odd if someone cried about everything, but it sounds like you're dealing with a lot of stuff and I can't imagine why anyone would judge harshly over a little breakdown as long as you were able to pull it together.

((((Hugs))))

MollyandD · May 2014

I'm sorry about all your stress! I've cried in the past, but I'm pretty good at hiding it usually. When I worked a summer job (I'm a teacher) a couple years ago, my dog of 14 years died. I took that day off, but still had to go to unlock the place. When my coworkers asked why I wasn't staying, I broke down and sobbed. I'm not even a little ashamed of that though. I do not regret crying over that amazing dog.

NowIamMrsKlein · May 2014

I have once. My FI and I were long distance for the majority of our relationship prior to being engaged.

When he got a job offer to a new city we decided it was time to 'make the leap' and go with him. While he was away for a month of training I found us a place to live, moved us up there and started a new job. So after living in a new city by myself for about 2 months he finally moved up there with me.

We of course eagerly made weekend plans to explore the city together and the friday morning he got called to work (he's a pilot) and would be gone for the next 4 days. And wouldnt even be able to stop by my work to say goodbye because he had to leave pretty quickly. I was devestated and overwhelmed and started crying in the breakroom.

Thankfully my new employers turned out to be the most amazing people ever and when I explained the situation to them they told me that i better hurry up and get my butt to the airport and to take the monday off which allowed me to actually go on the flight with my FI and spend the 4 days together even though he was working.

Long story short, I think sometimes its best to let people around you know whats going on, they may surprise you. I wouldnt have dared ask to leave, and i was so embarrased to be caught crying. But, for the most part, people (even coworkers and bosses) have hearts. Perhaps find someone at work that you are closer to and confide in them your stresses etc. Even having that one person around that knows what you are going through may be the support you need to get through the day,

Couggal12 · May 2014

@Cookie Pusher, the Director of my department can be very borderline verbally abusive. She literally does not know how to talk to people at all which is odd because I work in Human Resources. You would think she would be good at dealing with people! I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

@erlin25, that's a good point about me being too hard on myself. I know I definitely am and people eventually crack when things get too difficult. It's human nature. And I think I'm going to meet FI in the city for Happy Hour. I need to unwind now.

cupcait927 · May 2014

I've cried a few times at work. Not at the job I have now but at my previous employer. I always tried to do it in private but the couple of times it was in front of someone, it was someone I was close with at work and usually where I couldn't be seen/heard. I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time right now. I agree with @erinlin25 to not be too hard on yourself and to do something for you today.

JennyColada · May 2014

I work in retail (a manager no less!) and I'm VERY open with my emotions.

I hold it together pretty well considering, and often get compliment by co-workers/employees how I'm so cool and level headed. But they don't see me once I get home...
My hat being said, I think I've cried two times: once was at my last job where I just got SO frustrated at my boss's assistant who was really just a rude bitch: with glazed eyes I told my assistant that I needed to "go get a coffee" and ran out with my phone. He knew something was seriously up since in nearly four years of us working together (various jobs) he's NEVER seen me be emotional at work. It was SO embarrassing though and later I ranted and cried to Fi about how I felt like I let down my team by showing them that.

The other time was many years ago at my very first management job: we were doing an overnight shift and since we were down in staff we borrowed managers from another store. Despite me working at my location for two years, I felt like they railroaded over me with all their shitty ideas. Plus I was physically exhausted (working 8pm-9am will do that!).

Couggal12 · May 2014

KGold80 said:

The MRI shit alone would bring me to tears! I have cried at work - because of being put through the ringer as a witness to some heavy interpersonal shit that I had no business being involved in, but someone decided that I was best suited to be the damned note taker to ensure that things were properly reported. I have also cried tears of happiness because I am fortunate to work with some pretty amazing people who go out of their way to show they appreciate me. I would think it odd if someone cried about everything, but it sounds like you're dealing with a lot of stuff and I can't imagine why anyone would judge harshly over a little breakdown as long as you were able to pull it together. ((((Hugs))))

SITB****

That's actually a good point. I have worked with people before who are super and overly emotional to the point of daily crying sessions. Thank you for the hugs.

Couggal12 · May 2014

Molly&Domenic said:

I'm sorry about all your stress! I've cried in the past, but I'm pretty good at hiding it usually. When I worked a summer job (I'm a teacher) a couple years ago, my dog of 14 years died. I took that day off, but still had to go to unlock the place. When my coworkers asked why I wasn't staying, I broke down and sobbed. I'm not even a little ashamed of that though. I do not regret crying over that amazing dog.

There is no way I could hold back the tears if my furbaby died, ugh. I am so sorry. I would have been a crying mess if I were you.

MollyandD · May 2014

Couggal12 said:

Molly&Domenic said:

I'm sorry about all your stress! I've cried in the past, but I'm pretty good at hiding it usually. When I worked a summer job (I'm a teacher) a couple years ago, my dog of 14 years died. I took that day off, but still had to go to unlock the place. When my coworkers asked why I wasn't staying, I broke down and sobbed. I'm not even a little ashamed of that though. I do not regret crying over that amazing dog.

There is no way I could hold back the tears if my furbaby died, ugh. I am so sorry. I would have been a crying mess if I were you.

Oh I was. She was my baby girl since I was 10 years old. I still have her picture hanging up. I have a new little poodle now, but it doesn't make me love the one I lost any less.

SmileDamnit · May 2014

I've cried a couple of time at work but it had nothing to do with work rather that's just happened to be where I was (once, I found out on my drive into the office that my long time BF had been cheating on me and I went directly into my coworker/friend's office and sobbed; another time we all found out that the boss's daughter & grand daughter had been killed in a car accident).

I have a coworker who cries ALL the time. He's very emotional and I'd say something sets the tears off at least once a month. That's a bit excessive for the work place, IMO.

Hugs to you. Sounds like you've got a lot on your shoulders right now and could use some R&R. Drink some wine & get a good night sleep.

JennyColada · May 2014

I also had to go in for a liver biopsy recently (well, October), and a few blood tests prior to that. It was pretty emotional, so I can relate. It definitely made me very distracted. *hugs*

Blergbot · May 2014

Is there a job I haven't cried at? The answer is no. Sorry about the stress! Now I'm going to go cry...

KGold80 · May 2014

Molly&Domenic said:

Couggal12 said:

Molly&Domenic said:

I'm sorry about all your stress! I've cried in the past, but I'm pretty good at hiding it usually. When I worked a summer job (I'm a teacher) a couple years ago, my dog of 14 years died. I took that day off, but still had to go to unlock the place. When my coworkers asked why I wasn't staying, I broke down and sobbed. I'm not even a little ashamed of that though. I do not regret crying over that amazing dog.

There is no way I could hold back the tears if my furbaby died, ugh. I am so sorry. I would have been a crying mess if I were you.

Oh I was. She was my baby girl since I was 10 years old. I still have her picture hanging up. I have a new little poodle now, but it doesn't make me love the one I lost any less.

I had to put my 11 year old canine best friend to sleep last year and it was awful. I cried buckets and I still tear up thinking about him. I have a mini schnauzer now who I love dearly, but Orion will always hold a very special place in my heart. Best dog ever.

Couggal12 · May 2014

Blergbot said:

Is there a job I haven't cried at? The answer is no. Sorry about the stress! Now I'm going to go cry...

Look what I started!

Couggal12 · May 2014

Jennycolada said:

I also had to go in for a liver biopsy recently (well, October), and a few blood tests prior to that. It was pretty emotional, so I can relate. It definitely made me very distracted. *hugs*

I hope you are okay! Yes, it's the unknown that is making me so stressed. I guess I'm glad it's scheduled for Friday so I'm not waiting around for much longer.

JennyColada · May 2014

@couggal12, I'm fine...for now (hence the nature of liver issues: slow moving, but just gotta keep an eye on it).

The unknown was totally the worst. The fact that I had no one to talk to that had experience with it made me imagine the worst. Having answers (and thus a plan) makes things so much easier to handle. I hope that whatever is causing you to go in is small and easy to deal with. Sending you much good energy!

Also, Fi was a great nurse: he spoiled me with THREE different types of Mac and cheese!

FiancB · May 2014

Yep I've definitely cried. I don't think I did at my first job. I did at a country club I hosted at because a coworker was incredibly nasty to me that day and I get angry tears. I've cried over nasty customers. I cried at the dairy because I made a huge mistake and was scared I'd get fired. I cried at one barn because of being exhausted and hearing a past acquaintance died. I cried at the next barn because a horse was so badly abused its tail needed amputated (and when my dog died, and when my ex dumped me... sucks when your home and job is the same thing lol). And at the next barn because my boss was an abusive dickwad and I'd moved two states away for that job to begin with. And at the next barn I again was exhausted and frustrated with a lot of things and kind of lost it when I asked for the next day off and was told no, even though they were really nice about it. I never cried at Applebee's in front of anyone but did on the way home a lot.

So yeah. I definitely have cried at work. I'm so sorry you're going through a lot and hope everything's okay. I would think that people would assume that there is something personal going on, and that it's a one time thing.

Couggal12 · May 2014

Jennycolada said:

@couggal12, I'm fine...for now (hence the nature of liver issues: slow moving, but just gotta keep an eye on it). The unknown was totally the worst. The fact that I had no one to talk to that had experience with it made me imagine the worst. Having answers (and thus a plan) makes things so much easier to handle. I hope that whatever is causing you to go in is small and easy to deal with. Sending you much good energy! Also, Fi was a great nurse: he spoiled me with THREE different types of Mac and cheese!

He is heaven sent! That sounds delicious.

I also don't have many people to talk to about this besides FI and my best friend. I don't want to worry anyone yet, so I'm sort of waiting. And I hope everything continues to stay fine for you.

Couggal12 · May 2014

FiancB said:

Yep I've definitely cried. I don't think I did at my first job. I did at a country club I hosted at because a coworker was incredibly nasty to me that day and I get angry tears. I've cried over nasty customers. I cried at the dairy because I made a huge mistake and was scared I'd get fired. I cried at one barn because of being exhausted and hearing a past acquaintance died. I cried at the next barn because a horse was so badly abused its tail needed amputated (and when my dog died, and when my ex dumped me... sucks when your home and job is the same thing lol). And at the next barn because my boss was an abusive dickwad and I'd moved two states away for that job to begin with. And at the next barn I again was exhausted and frustrated with a lot of things and kind of lost it when I asked for the next day off and was told no, even though they were really nice about it. I never cried at Applebee's in front of anyone but did on the way home a lot.

So yeah. I definitely have cried at work. I'm so sorry you're going through a lot and hope everything's okay. I would think that people would assume that there is something personal going on, and that it's a one time thing.

SITB

UGH there is nothing worse than abusive bosses. Seriously. My boss before this job was awesome but, the job paid shitty. It really makes me appreciate her and makes me miss how good I had it working with her.

SapphireCounselor · May 2014

Couggal12 said:

For the most part, I'm really laid back. I don't let my coworkers get me upset and I definitely have learned not to take anything personal my boss says or the Director of my department says to me when it comes to criticism. However, today I couldn't help it and I broke down and cried. I found out today that I have to have an MRI for my brain on Friday and I'm just worried/stressed about that and then all this work I've been doing for a project my boss needs was completely shut down, ripped apart and now I have to start over. Even though I thought I did a pretty good job at it and have asked tons of questions to make sure it was what her expectations were.
Ugh. I HATE crying in front of people and I'm just glad my boss did not see me. She's even said before she can't think of a single reason you would openly cry at work.
Does anyone else ever cry at work? Or have them in the past?

I'm so sorry you had an awful day! It sounds like you were dealing with a lot! Go home tonight, relax and have all the wine to destress. I have cried at work. Not often, but it has happened. It has not happened at my current job, but I've only been here a year so...

Ironically I don't cry when I feel sad, only when I feel angry or ambushed.

Couggal12 · May 2014

@SapphireCounselor, I cry when I feel angry too sometimes. Especially if I get super, super frustrated with a situation or a person.

Okay, so consensus sounds like all the wine tonight. Anyone else drinking? I'm a west coast knottie so I'm leaving work in 5.

SmileDamnit · May 2014

Cheers to almost being done with work then, @Couggal12! I'm lifting my New Belgium Snapshot wheat beer to you, dear!

aspoonfulofsugar · May 2014

Sorry you're having a rough time- good thoughts (and deep breaths, they always help me!) your way.

Yes, I have definitely cried at work. For the first few months of last school year I was being harassed by the grandfather of one of my students and was receiving NO back-up from my principal. I used to spend my lunches crying/hyperventilating in the bathroom. The other teachers were VERY supportive (most especially my grade partner) and sympathetic. I never showed anything other than my teacher face in front of my students once.

I did openly cry in front of parents and my students this time last year after another teacher died suddenly one afternoon of a massive heart attack.

SapphireCounselor · May 2014

Couggal12 said:

@SapphireCounselor, I cry when I feel angry too sometimes. Especially if I get super, super frustrated with a situation or a person.
Okay, so consensus sounds like all the wine tonight. Anyone else drinking? I'm a west coast knottie so I'm leaving work in 5.

I just ran out of Riesling.

But I do have the fixings for an apple martini.

amakayeb · May 2014

I have cried together with my coworkers many times. (We had a student killed in an accident a few years ago, we had a long-time coworker need to retire because of her battle with cancer...). I cried in front of my students my first year--my mom had cancer, and something set me off, and I lost it. I also cry every time I read certain books to them (Bridge to Terabithia, anyone?)

This year, I have cried a few times. I had a difficult situation with a parent, and I cried in my principal's office when discussing it with him. And I cried at the faculty meeting when we found out we would have to go an extra hour a day (for possibly the rest of the year) to make up snow days. I have a very exhausting class, and I was just overwhelmed by that thought.

mysticl · May 2014

I totally cried at a previous job. It's really hard not to when people are lying about you and complaining about you for doing your job.

ShadeofGreen816 · May 2014

(((HUGS))) Good thoughts to you!! And yes, I cry at my job all the time! Granted, I work in a really stressful environment - as a nurse at one of the bigger, more acute ICUs in the state. So, aside from the sad parts, I am a angry/frustrated crier also! I definitely needed a beer after today's shift!

Cry away!! And vent/worry to us if you don't want to burden your family/friends/coworkers!

Crying at work....

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