Ever been asked to remove your engagement ring?

beethery · May 2014

If someone wanted me to remove my jewelry, only because it was yellow gold, I would probably show up looking like Mr. T.

I'd take it off once I got the reaction I wanted. But, if I have an excuse to accessorize like Mr. T, you better believe it's going to happen.

Kauris · May 2014

I might, or might not show up to her wedding wearing something like this:

hyechica81 · May 2014

i would come all blinged out as a joke but have my real back up jewelry in a bag i would show up with one of those huge metal money signs you can get those at the party store lots of gold rings if you have multi pearcings some of those huge gold hops and some long gold earnings

omg she would freak out until you told her its just a joke

[Deleted User] · May 2014

@hyechica81 You often have good points, but I have trouble reading your posts due to the lack of punctuation.

SapphireCounselor · May 2014

djfivenine said:

Luckily this didn't quite happen to me, but it was a close call!

Backstory: I am in a wedding next month, and received an email from the bride yesterday with some day-of info. She mentioned that she wanted us all to wear "minimal, silver jewelry." OK fine, nothing really wrong with that. I responded "sounds great!" and the other bridesmaids did as well. Then I received a text message from the bride about 30 minutes later saying "I've been thinking about it, and I've decided that I'll still allow you to wear your engagement ring even though it's yellow gold."

Um... thanks?

She hasn't been an overly demanding bride through the whole process, and this whole exchange was just very shocking to me. I fear that she's now thinking she's being suuuch an understanding bride, "allowing" me to wear my engagement ring even though it goes against her "vision" or whatever.

Has anything this absurd ever happened to any of you? Do you have any tips on how I should react to her, if at all? I kind of got out of having to directly respond to her, since she followed up that text with an unrelated question. I don't know if I should "lecture" her or anything, but just letting it go seems kind of weird too...

Wow...Well at least she ultimately decided against it? That is ridiculous.

HisGirlFriday13 · May 2014

Inkdancer said:

HisGirlFriday13 said:

I've had a couple people ask me to take it off so they 'can see it better.'

Uhm....no.

I would have texted back, 'Well I assumed as much because it's non-negotiable and only a bridezilla would demand something to patently unreasonable.'

ETA: I would have texted that back immediately, but right now, I'd let it go. And internally side-eye. And snark about it on TK.

I actually do take it off so people can see it, because there is engraving all the way around the band and tiny hearts are carved into the setting under the stone. There is a lot of detail to my ring that you can't see when it's on my finger.

If you don't mind doing it, that's fine. My ring has half pave-set/half plain band. Me taking it off isn't going to let you see anything better.

I just would never ASK someone, 'Oh, please take your engagement ring off so I can see it better.' If they offer, that's one thing. I feel like it's rude to ASK someone to take it off on my account.

sophhabobopha · May 2014

I'd be all

Weesh · May 2014

With all of the things that go into planning a wedding, the fact that she's thought about jewelry right down to the color is a little sad.

SomethingBeautiful08 · May 2014

My e-ring spent about a third of my engagement on a chain around my neck because I were I worked at the time didn't allow ring to be worn for safety reasons. I work in a different place now and still love that I get to wear it to work everyday. It is unfathonable to me to ask someone to remove their ring(s) for any reason beyond safety.

APDSS22 · May 2014

I did have to remove it while working in the lab for my degree, but it was because it would've ripped my gloves and you have to use proper safety equipment, makes sense. I just put it on the chain of my necklace my husband gave me for our first Christmas as a couple.

Unless she brings it up again though, I'd just ignore it.

SP29 · May 2014

That's just silly. No one is going to notice that a bridesmaid's ring is yellow gold. And even if they do, who cares?

Initially I might have responded with some snark, but now I'd let it go.

There are times I don't wear my e-ring (I have a horse, and I don't like wearing it to the barn), but that is my decision and unless it is a safety issue, no one else can tell me when I can or can't wear my ring.

short+sassy · May 2014

afox007 said:

Wasn't fully told to take it off, but the owner of the resturaunt I waitress at suggested not wearing it if I want better tips from guys. I just rolled my eyes and kept it on.

Actually, I had a friend who said she got better tips when she wore a wedding ring. She wasn't married, not even engaged. She just wore a fake set at work. Because she was young looking, she felt customers took her more seriously if she wore the rings. I don't think I've ever consciously noticed my server's rings/lack of. But she said she tested it both ways over a number of shifts and definitely got better tips on the "ring" days.

Moiramab · May 2014

Weesh said:

With all of the things that go into planning a wedding, the fact that she's thought about jewelry right down to the color is a little sad.

SIB

I can only imagine people who spend time thinking of this kind of minute detail already their PPD planned far far in advance

photokitty · May 2014

Not my engagement ring, but I was told I couldn't wear the right hand diamond ring I wore everyday bc it was platinum not the requested yellow gold (I wasn't engage or married at the time). I put it back on as soon as I walked into the reception. I totally side eyed the request (demand).

ETA another girl with a white gold ering was permitted to her's as well as the bride with her white gold ering and wedding band.

JellyBean52513 · May 2014

This is not something I would have given a snarky response to. I definitely WOULD respond, but with direct honesty: "No offense, but I wouldn't have taken it off anyway, it's the most important piece of jewelry I own, whether or not it fits your color scheme for the wedding."

LizM61409 · May 2014

wrigleyville said:

Alex3Mom said:

I refused to take my rings off for surgery.

Some patients do, but I hope the nurses informed you that if your fingers swelled too much, they would have to cut the ring off.

Personally, I would rather remove it myself and put it somewhere safe than risk it being cut off my finger. I'm not judging; I'm just explaining why I would never leave it on and risk that.

Uhh, not to mention the electrocautery! (Yes, there's a grounding pad and it would probably be fine, but do you want to take even a small risk of an electrical burn all the way around your ring finger??).

I say this as someone who operates for a living and has to take my ring off whenever I'm in the OR- doesn't make me any less engaged

kitsunegari89 · May 2014

I am in a karate sparring/self-defense class, and a woman asked me to take off my e-ring because she was worried I'd hit her in the face with it. I side-eyed her bigtime (I don't make physical contact with the older folks in the class, anyways and she knew that) and turned the stones towards the inside of my palm. The thing isn't even that big. She needed to calm down... besides, where was I supposed to put it? In my shoes out by the door? LOL

PrettyGirlLost · May 2014

APDSS22 said:

I did have to remove it while working in the lab for my degree, but it was because it would've ripped my gloves and you have to use proper safety equipment, makes sense. I just put it on the chain of my necklace my husband gave me for our first Christmas as a couple.

Unless she brings it up again though, I'd just ignore it.

I wear my ring on the outside of my gloves when in the lab, unless I'm working with really nasty reagents and then I take it off.

kitty8403 · May 2014

The only time I have ever seen people get away with asking others to remove engagement or wedding rings for an event is if they are directing a play. Then the items are part of a much longer dress code list (other jewelry, sunglasses, caps, watches, hairstyles, undergarments) and it's as much to prevent accidental loss as it is to keep the characters' images appropriate. I've never seen this done just to make a wedding uniform.
I'd also remove mine on request (or voluntarily) if I'm about to do something gross, like deliver puppies or smear grease all over machinery parts. Otherwise, that's not a request people should be making.

beethery · May 2014

photokitty said:

Not my engagement ring, but I was told I couldn't wear the right hand diamond ring I wore everyday bc it was platinum not the requested yellow gold (I wasn't engage or married at the time). I put it back on as soon as I walked into the reception. I totally side eyed the request (demand).

ETA another girl with a white gold ering was permitted to her's as well as the bride with her white gold ering and wedding band.

That broad would've gotten a big pile of "Fuck your own self" from me, especially if the other girls got a pass on their non-yellow rings.

kitty8403 · May 2014

mrshutzler said:

I am in a karate sparring/self-defense class, and a woman asked me to take off my e-ring because she was worried I'd hit her in the face with it. I side-eyed her bigtime (I don't make physical contact with the older folks in the class, anyways and she knew that) and turned the stones towards the inside of my palm. The thing isn't even that big. She needed to calm down... besides, where was I supposed to put it? In my shoes out by the door? LOL

LOL! no kidding. How awkward.
Honestly, though, I don't like working out with my ring on, anyway, so I usually avoid wearing it at the gym.

Ever been asked to remove your engagement ring?

Re: Ever been asked to remove your engagement ring?

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