Hi everyone, this is my first time posting. I don't know if this is technically an "etiquette" question, but to me it seemed like a question of "is it OK to do this?" so I figured that it would best fit under this category instead of under the "receptions" board.
Our situation is unique: FI and I won a contest with a local restaurant owner where we get a free buffet lunch or dinner + open bar for up to 50 guests for our wedding reception. The problem is that we both have large extended families (he is very close to his, I am so-so with mine), plus several friends. There is no way we could feasibly whittle down our friends and our family to 50. So we are considering something along the following: inviting everyone (friends and family) to the ceremony, which would be at a separate site from the reception. Immediately following the ceremony, we could do a cake/punch/coffee/tea/wine "mini-reception" for everyone, where we would cut the cake, since that is a part of our wedding that we want to share with everyone. Then, we would have the buffet meal+open bar just for our family (plus 2 of our close friends who are in the wedding party, and they know our family really well), since we can't possibly whittle our family+friends down to 50. The meal/open bar reception should last 3-4 hours. After that, we would have an "after-party" with an open bar and appetizers/late-night snacks for our friends at a separate site (possibly the hotel where we are staying after the wedding), which would last 2-3 hours. I know this is a lot to pack into one day, but it seems it is the only way to have both our family and our friends involved in our special day. We would ideally love to have them all at one reception, but the venue who we won the contest through can only accommodate 50 due to the limitations of their space, and we certainly don't want to throw away what is essentially a free reception. Since it would be a lot in one day, we were thinking of having the ceremony start around 1pm on a Saturday, with the cake/coffee/tea/wine mini-reception immediately following, and the family dinner to go from about 4-8pm (we would be taking pictures in-between), and the after party from about 9pm-12am.
So my question is, do you think this would be ok? Do you think people would be offended by this arrangement? I would love to have everyone at one place at one time, but we have no control over how many people the venue can fit, and they're giving this to us for free! Also, the reception venue where we won the dinner/open bar is not large enough to accommodate a dance floor, so that part will really just be eating and drinking/socializing, which seems to me to be more appropriate for a family affair, whereas an after party with drinks and dancing seems most appropriate for our friends (we are both early 30s, as our most of our friends).