Funny things your FI/SO/DH/DW/partner/whatever you call them has said.

lyndausvi · June 2014

Another post on another board reminded me of something my DH asked me during the wedding process. I thought I would share and want to hear things your SO/FI/DH/DW has said.

So one day while watching TV there was a bride with a veil on. DH turned to me and said "You are not going to be wearing one of those mosquito net thingies over your face are you?"

Seriously, all I could do was laugh. I guess years living in the islands sleeping under nets made him see veils in a different light. I had already bought my dress and planned on NOT having a veil (much to the sales persons dismay - apparently you are not a bride unless you had a "mosquito net-thingy"), but the comment pretty much closed that subject.

cupcait927 · June 2014

That is hilarious!

NWR but made me laugh - FI told me the other day he didn't know that women could tell when they were ovulating. He said that he thought it required doctors "doing complicated tests with vials and beakers" (highly scientific). I just laughed and told him that it wasn't that complicated and that if he really wanted to know, Google could clue him in.

wandajune6 · June 2014

I'm working from home today while FI has the day off. I'm doing boring busy work so "Four Weddings" is in the background and he's sprawled on the couch. I was just asked why the bride chopped off her veil. Apparently birdcages are something new to him.

aspoonfulofsugar · June 2014

For some reason FI always calls a claw foot tub a "bear claw" tub, it makes me giggle every time!

jdluvr06 · June 2014

These are cracking me up.

When FI and I were looking at invitations, before we decided to make out own. We were looking at font samples and he turned to me and said "OMG! Why are there so many can't we just use the curly one everyone else uses?"

sophhabobopha · June 2014

"Do you think somebody would buy us a pool table?"

Speaking of registries. What a dingis.

buttercup1958 · June 2014

WR: V thinks birdcage veils remind him of bags that onions come in haha
NWR: This happen yesterday, V thought a breastfeeding pump was an air horn

luckya23 · June 2014

When SO went to the jewelry store to look at engagement rings, they asked if he had a timeline. He said, "Nobody's pregnant, but we're not getting any younger and we're not going to do any better."

I might just make that into a banner for the "big day" :-P

jenna8984 · June 2014

Me- I am pretty sure I don't want a veil but my maid of honor says I should at least try one on since it's my only chance in life to wear a veil.

FI- Well that's not true.... Aren't you going to wear a veil at my funeral one day?!

(Because apparently he thinks we live in the Young and the Restless?)

pinkcow13 · June 2014

FI used to ask me if I needed "tampons with wings or 4 wall protection." SMH.

theartistformerlyknownas · June 2014

This is more of a "my FI is just really funny" thing rather than "I can't believe he said that" kind of thing... I was complaining about my hair one day, and how the layers were "flying out and making me look like Farrah Fawcett." His sarcastic reply, "ugh, I know. I just hate when my 5 o'clock shadow grows in and makes me look like Tom Brady. Life is such a struggle." Then looked at me like this.

Touche, honey, Touche.

LadyMillil · June 2014

DH: "We should get you a mom car"

Me: "What's a mom car? And why?"

DH "You'd look hot in a mom car, like a minivan or SUV"

Me: "Does that mean you're ready to have kids?"

DH: "No. You'd just look hotter in a mom car than in your Corolla"

I didn't know what to say to that

mrsmorales2be · June 2014

Random stuff my FI says:
"One time I couldn't sleep because I ate three kiwis before I went to bed."

"I'm a really bad camper, babe. I sit around the campfire and wait for someone to say something funny so I can laugh, because I just love laughing!"

I've got plenty of 'em - he's always saying something crazy.

edit: Paragraphs! WTF, TK?!? really?

PrincessOfHavoc · June 2014

"If you keep walking in front of me without your shirt on, I will give in to temptation and forget the game is on."

Um, duh. That's why I was doing that.

AddieCake · June 2014

This is not something my husband said, but one of his best friends. When we sent out our STDs, he texted him to say, "We got your wedding warning thing!"

Oh, great. Our wedding warning thing. That doesn't make it sound ominous at all!

lc07 · June 2014

My H asked if my dress would have a tail.

HaileyDancingbear · June 2014

FI and I had a really in depth conversation about having Godzilla as a wedding guest.

It would be someone in a 7 foot tall suit. He would be there for the ceremony and would be sobbing with a box of tissues. Godzilla gets really mushy over this stuff.

He'd be seated at a table with a bunch of older and very confused relatives and would just jam food in the mouth part. He would give a toast, which would just be the Godzilla roar.

Godzilla would get wasted at the reception. Oh, and he'd give us a school bus with a bow on it as a wedding gift. When I do the bouquet toss, he would shove the bridesmaids out of the way and catch it then start dancing really happily.

PrincessOfHavoc · June 2014

So, looking at wedding shoes. Tea length, so visible. DF rolls his eyes and suggested my boots. I rolled my eyes right back and said I wasn't wearing my slutty boots and went back to searching. DF left room, came back. With a pair of my composite toed work boots.

DF - "No, I mean wear these!"

Me - "Those are composite toed boots I wear to work. They are not for our wedding."

DF - "But they make your legs look hot, what's wrong with them?"

Now I want to find a nicer pair of similar boots for our wedding. Damn him.

blabla89 · June 2014

Last night FI and I started watching OITNB, got to the scene with the tampon sandwich. This led to FI asking every question he's ever had about girl things, including a lot of 'WTF" and "HOW DOES THAT EVEN WORK?" Every time I answered a question he just got more and more confused. I think it was probably one of those things that wasn't funny unless you were there...but I laughed until my face hurt.

cupcait927 · June 2014

blabla89 said:

Last night FI and I started watching OITNB, got to the scene with the tampon sandwich. This led to FI asking every question he's ever had about girl things, including a lot of 'WTF" and "HOW DOES THAT EVEN WORK?" Every time I answered a question he just got more and more confused. I think it was probably one of those things that wasn't funny unless you were there...but I laughed until my face hurt.

FI is the same way (hence my post above with him asking about ovulation). He's so completely confused by how a woman's body work and the logistics. It's hilarious.

CamiSelene · June 2014

When FI and I were going over reception costs and we got to the cost of non-alcoholic drinks, he said this:

"This is per glass? That's like getting a drink at the movie theatre! But we'd be buying drinks for everyone at the theatre, not just us..... I have an idea, the venue people didn't say it had to be their glasses.... let's get everyone a big gulp cup and have them fill those every time! It's genius!" (sadly, he was serious and the non-alcoholic drink prices are pretty much on par with every other wedding venue. lol)

When asked what kind of dress he thinks I'll have, he said:

"Knowing CamiSelene, probably something with a cardigan." (I'm a kindergarten/grade 1 teacher and I guess that means I wear a lot of cardigans according to him. haha)

larrygaga · June 2014

buttercup1958 said:

WR: V thinks birdcage veils remind him of bags that onions come in haha
NWR: This happen yesterday, V thought a breastfeeding pump was an air horn

We saw a breast pump on TV and FI thought it was a weird handheld vacuum.

buttercup1958 · June 2014

larrygaga said:

buttercup1958 said:

WR: V thinks birdcage veils remind him of bags that onions come in haha
NWR: This happen yesterday, V thought a breastfeeding pump was an air horn

We saw a breast pump on TV and FI thought it was a weird handheld vacuum.

haha nice! Did you have to try to explain how a breastfeeding pump works? V thought it just shoots milk at the babies.

larrygaga · June 2014

buttercup1958 said:

larrygaga said:

buttercup1958 said:

WR: V thinks birdcage veils remind him of bags that onions come in haha
NWR: This happen yesterday, V thought a breastfeeding pump was an air horn

We saw a breast pump on TV and FI thought it was a weird handheld vacuum.

haha nice! Did you have to try to explain how a breastfeeding pump works? V thought it just shoots milk at the babies.

No, I just laughed at him. He doesn't need to know about all that until we try and have kids.

buttercup1958 · June 2014

larrygaga said:

buttercup1958 said:

larrygaga said:

buttercup1958 said:

WR: V thinks birdcage veils remind him of bags that onions come in haha
NWR: This happen yesterday, V thought a breastfeeding pump was an air horn

We saw a breast pump on TV and FI thought it was a weird handheld vacuum.

haha nice! Did you have to try to explain how a breastfeeding pump works? V thought it just shoots milk at the babies.

No, I just laughed at him. He doesn't need to know about all that until we try and have kids.

Ah ok, V kept asking me how it works so I tried to explain it. It made a trip to target very memorable or scarring

Funny things your FI/SO/DH/DW/partner/whatever you call them has said.

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