My wedding party consists of just my MOH. Because this is my second wedding, I wanted to keep things simple and low-key. When my friend Kate found out she wasn't a bridesmaid, she was very upset. Kate was a bridesmaid in my first wedding 10 years ago. Honestly, I thought she would have been happy to not have to buy another dress. She made some comments about showing up in the same color dress as my MOH and it really rubbed me the wrong way. I felt that she didn't care about standing up with me on my wedding day - she just wanted to wear a special dress so that people at the wedding knew she was one of my best friends.
I told my MOH that I didn't want any parties, especially not a shower. She told me she wanted to throw me a bachelorette party/weekend and I agreed. Aside from giving her a list of names, I had absolutely no involvement in the planning of any of this.
MOH ended up renting a house in the Finger Lakes. We're spending the weekend and going wine tasting. MOH picked the absolute perfect location and activity. It's right up my alley.
My friend Rebecca started complaining to me about what MOH chose for us to do. Rebecca thinks we should be getting dressed up, going out in Manhattan to a club, etc. That's not at all what I want. That's what we did for my bachelorette party 10 years ago, when I was 24. Rebecca knows this - she was present for my first bach party! And I've told her that I don't want to do that.
Rebecca also doesn't particularly like my MOH. They've never really gotten along. Rebecca complains to me about my MOH. It makes me super uncomfortable and I've told her this. But Rebecca is really a great friend - she's making my broach bouquet and is doing my hair/makeup for free (she's a hairdresser). Her husband and my FI are best friends so we all spend a lot of time together.
Last week, I went out for drinks with Kate. She brought up the bachelorette party and complained to me that it was too expensive. Ok? What would you like me to do about that? I do know that my MOH asked for everyone's budget before she planned anything and that she stayed within that budget.
Then FI went to get his haircut by Rebecca yesterday and she was complaining to him about the bachelorette party AGAIN too. He came home and told me about it. I stopped him before he even got to tell me what she was complaining about.
This weekend is in no way mandatory. If they don't want to come, then don't freaking come! This weekend is the ONLY wedding themed party/event that I'm having. Last I heard, Rebecca was only coming for Saturday night, so I'm not sure what she's so pissed about.
I feel that with the two of them complaining, they've totally cast a dark cloud over what I thought was going to be a relaxed, fun weekend.