When do you plan to "ask" your bridal party?

fall2015bride · June 2014

I'm just curious when those of you getting married in September 2015 are going to ask your bridal party to stand by your side? Have some of you already asked or do you plan to wait a while?

lmdmatt · June 2014

I already asked. I asked pretty much the second my fiance and I decided to get married.

I am not good at keeping secrets.

nicolie1125 · June 2014

I'm waiting a little bit. Probably bc I have a feeling there might be some drama amongst the party... Hoping I'm wrong about that!

jennyleigh16 · June 2014

My MOH was pretty much a given. We've been best friends since preschool and it was just understood that we would be there for each other. My FI is asking his brother to be his BM but hasn't gotten around to it yet, but that's also understood.

He's also thinking about asking his father to be a groomsman and I'd like to have my brother stand up with me but we're waiting awhile to ask. No real reason, we just have lots of time.

We probably won't wait much longer as I am also not good at keeping secrets.

fall2015bride · June 2014

I don't know what I'm going to do. There really isn't anyone to be my bridesmaid/s and I want to have at least one but I wish I could have at least 2! FI's at least got his brother to be his best man. I have no sisters, my cousins all live far away in another state and they are too busy with their own lives to even respond to my emails. (rolling my eyes) I don't have any girlfriends. FI has no sisters and only one female cousin-in-law. My brother recently got married but his wife is much much older than me and I don't feel close to her. Not to be rude, but I don't really want her as an option. I've been thinking for months now about asking FI's cousin-in-law (who also lives out of state but expressed that she will come to our wedding) She and I have been emailing back and fourth but we don't know each other too well. My other idea was asking another cousin of mine who lives out of state (one of them that never responds to me) but I worry about drama with her because a few years back ago she asked me to be a BM in her wedding and I said yes. I had to back out due to a work situation at the time. I felt horrible about it and there could be some resentment there. I don't know what to do!

jennyleigh16 · June 2014

@fall2015bride

What about having your brother stand up for you? I've always understood that it should be the people who are closest to you. Rather than asking women you barely know, simply to fill a role, why not honor your sibling?

fall2015bride · June 2014

I just really wanted a brides'maid'. Otherwise it would be 3 guys and me standing up there (FI, FI's brother and mine) which is fine, it's just not what I really want.

jennyleigh16 · June 2014

If you're so concerned with having a woman for a bridesmaid, what about having your mother or grandmother if you're close? My FI is having his father as a groomsman because after his brother, that's the man he's closest to. If I didn't have two clear options (as well as wanting a small wedding party) I'd definitely consider having my mom as my MOH. She may drive me a little batty sometimes, but she's one of the most important people in my life. In fact, I asked her to be a reader.

island07b2b · June 2014

My side of the WP is set and has been for awhile. They were asked shortly after the decision was made to marry. My fiance's side is still open and will probably stay that way until closer to the wedding. He figures he has plenty of time to make a decision as to who he wants to stand by him at the altar.

11altenale · June 2014

I've also already asked my bridal party! I was too excited and I had a certain group of girls in mind so the day after being engaged I asked them.

dawnmaldrich · June 2014

My wedding is September 12, 2015. I also asked my bridal party as soon as the ring was on my finger. That, I'm finding was a HUGE mistake on my part. My fiancée wanted a big wedding and I told him to pick his guys and I would pick my girls to match. He chose 8 guys, his 3 brothers, my 3 sons and 2 very close friends. My girls have been fighting since we picked dresses. They absolutely hate each other and it has stressed me to the point I am seriously ready to elope. I don't want to elope and neither does my fiancée but the stress of the bridesmaids fighting is overwhelming. So my advice to anyone would be wait until the date is closer and make sure its clear that there will be no fighting or drama.

Knottie41163862 · July 2014

I knew who I wanted in my bridal party right away, but I wanted to do something nice to ask them, as I am one of the last of my friends to get married! I had a card created for each of them, that featured a picture strip on the front of every girl in my party (7 bridesmaids, one MOH), with a little verse I had written inside, asking them to be part of my party. I mailed out the ones to my long distance friends first, and gave them out in person to those I knew I would see within one month of getting engaged!

They were a big hit:) It's a nice small keepsake.

Charisma1018 · July 2014

I got engaged last June. My fiance and I decided to have a long engagement to save up as much as we could to have the wedding of our dreams. Last August our moms threw us an engagement party. We asked those special and close to us then. We each have 8 on each side. I wanted to keep the sides even. My fiance chose his brother to be his BM and his sister to be his BW (best women) and then his best friend and two cousins are groomsmen. He had to borrow my brother and two guy friends to make up for the difference. Good thing he likes them! I have my younger sister as my MOH and my best guy friend as my MOH (man of honor) and then my other bridesmaids are my two cousins, my older sister, and 3 of my best girlfriends. I'm close with all of my girls and guy that is why I chose them...however, I feel like I chose a bit to early as I too have been having some issues with people responding and being around when I need them to be. I'm hoping as we get to the year out mark everyone will start coming together and being helpful v. distant. I don't want to feel like I made the wrong choice

luckyus10 · July 2014

I asked them same day, because we've been friends since we were 5 and I'd been waiting to ask them my whole life lol

tlc9615 · July 2014

My FI asked most of his groomsmen right away. The only one I asked so far is my SIL because FI asked my brother to be in the wedding and my nephew as a jr. groomsman and we asked my 2 nieces to be our flower girls. I asked her right away because I didn't want her to feel left out since the rest of her family will be in the wedding!

I ordered all of my bridesmaids that I plan to ask a personalized wine glass in the colors I want for the wedding with their name on the glass with bridesmaid or maid of honor on the base. That way they can have a little keepsake once I ask. I am sure once I receive the wine glasses (hopefully this weekend) I will start asking everyone else because I am just so excited! The only exception is I won't ask one until the end of August because she is a cousin from out of town that will be visiting and I would rather do it in person than mail it to her.

Latillo · July 2014

We were pretty lucky in the fact that we didn't have to really ask anyone. I am having my 2 best friends as co-MOH and my FI is having his 2 best friends as co-Best Men. We've known our whole lives we would be in each others weddings so it was a give in!

Latillo · July 2014

Keeping the wedding party small is the way to go! We are also having a destination wedding though so it was easier to do so.

FutureScrib15 · July 2014

I plan on asking this September on the day we're getting married.

fall2015bride · July 2014

FutureScrib15 said:

I plan on asking this September on the day we're getting married.

That's a sweet idea! I like that!

kimx86 · July 2014

When I got engaged, but that was over 2 years ago, totally regretted it! Half the girls (the ones I've known ages, the ones that are no-brainers and need to be there) I still want to be my bridesmaids, but then I regretted asking the other half on a whim and had a headache thinking of ways to break up with them once I realised they weren't really there for me throughout the last two years...

but all sorted now and won't be making any rash decisions wedding-wise again!

NowIamMrsKlein · July 2014

We've been engaged since March and are getting married September 12, 2015. We've held off on asking our wedding party for a variety of reasons. My little sister got married this past weekend and myself and my sister-in-law were in the party. I want both these ladies standing up with me, so I wanted to wait to ask them until after that wedding as to not take away from her day.

Also my FI is still undecided on his groomsmen. His best friend will obviously be his BM but he is unsure about other groomsmen. I have 3 ladies I want to ask and he only has 2 people in mind. And while I am completely ok with uneven sides (it's not about a photo-op, its about the people closest too you), he isn't quite sure what direction he wants to go being 2 friends or 1 friend and 2 brothers, or 1 friend and 1 brother. haha.

Im planning on going wedding dress shopping in October, so we will probably do the asking in late august or september.

ShannonLeigh1979 · July 2014

This is one thing that is done and set in stone for us. Our sons are our only wedding party.

barristerbride · July 2014

We got engaged in January and officially asked earlier this month. We did Mason Jars with "Be My Bridesmaid" labels from Everlane (stuffed with a ring pop, essie nail polish and other trinkets) and fiance sent cards from Etsy that said "I only get to make one decision in this wedding . . . will you be my groomsman?" Most of our bridal party already knew (unofficially) they would in in it, though.

kimissodope · July 2014

We got engaged in June. I have not officially "asked" them, but they know. I will be formally asking them in September...a year from the date.

kschro9 · August 2014

Our engagement Party is 9/13/14 and I plan on asking them all before then. Most of them pretty much know already

jleebles · September 2014

My fiance and I got engaged in February, (wedding is September 12, 2015) and we are just in the process of asking everyone now! Some of our wedding party does not live in the same city (or country!) so it depends on when we see everyone. The first girl I asked was my SIL to be my bridesmaid in early August. That was when I last saw her, and because I knew how long it was going to be until I saw her again. Asking my maids was something I wanted to do in person - not just via text, email, or over the phone, so everyone is getting asked at different times. I actually get to ask one of my girls today

It's all so exciting!!

britneydel · September 2014

I haven't officially asked yet, but two of them already know as they are my sister and soon to be sister-in-law. And there's already been talk of them being in the party.

nessiemmmkay · September 2014

We got engaged in April of this year. I asked my girls mostly in July of this year. I waited a few months only because I was not sure if I even wanted to have a wedding party or if we were going to do a destination wedding (with probably no bridal party or maybe one person on each side). We decided on a more traditional wedding, so once we decided that, I started asking (I have 4 girls). My FI asked 2 of his around the same time as me. He was up in the air about the other 2, so he just asked one a few weeks ago. At this time we will probably just leave it at 4 BM and 3 GR, unless he changes his mind again.

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