Right now is not the time to poke mama bear

beethery · June 2014

KatieinBkln said:

JCbride2015 said:

This thread is making me terrified of pregnancy. People can be so rude.

I think it says a lot about my personality that I kind of CAN'T WAIT to give people a piece of my mind. I'm naturally inclined to be cranky (see signature spirit animal-child), but I figure when I'm visibly pregnant, people should have the good sense not to poke at someone whose hormones are a-surgin'.

I'm going to have to get a bunch of maternity shirts made that have the word NO emblazoned on the tum, for when the time comes.

gladyscf · June 2014

There are a lot of people out there who have death wishes.

jdluvr06 · June 2014

What is wrong with people? God help the person who says something snarky to me when/if I get pregnant.

larrygaga · June 2014

Well, shit, congrats!

Aray82 · June 2014

I am constantly amazed by the stories of rudeness I hear from my friends with kids about their pregnancy periods. It's like, even otherwise well-mannered folks just suddenly get The Rudes when they hear of or see a pregnant woman. One of my friends is seriously considering making herself a t-shirt that says "Are YOU my doctor?" You could make one for yourself with financial advisor instead of doctor

monkeysip · June 2014

Ugh... I hate the "you're pregnant... you need to RUSH into marriage ASAP". The first thing my grandma said to my mom when my mom found out she was pregnant (she and dad weren't married yet--but were freaking 25 years old, not teens) was "don't you have somewhere you two need to go now??". They ended up going to the JOP.

And what does whether someone has kids have to do with how fancy their wedding can be? Is there some kind of max limit... you can only spend $2,000 on a wedding if you have 1 kid, and $1,000 if you have 2 or more kids? Good lord, can't people just smile and say congratulations? Having a child is something to celebrate, not a chance to shove your unsolicited views on someone.

Sorry you're dealing with that crap, OP. I'm due soon, and I could write a book of a million things people need to stop saying to pregnant women. But congrats on the baby and the wedding!

Angusaur · June 2014

monkeysip said:

Ugh... I hate the "you're pregnant... you need to RUSH into marriage ASAP". The first thing my grandma said to my mom when my mom found out she was pregnant (she and dad weren't married yet--but were freaking 25 years old, not teens) was "don't you have somewhere you two need to go now??". They ended up going to the JOP.

And what does whether someone has kids have to do with how fancy their wedding can be? Is there some kind of max limit... you can only spend $2,000 on a wedding if you have 1 kid, and $1,000 if you have 2 or more kids? Good lord, can't people just smile and say congratulations? Having a child is something to celebrate, not a chance to shove your unsolicited views on someone.

Sorry you're dealing with that crap, OP. I'm due soon, and I could write a book of a million things people need to stop saying to pregnant women. But congrats on the baby and the wedding!

Thank you! Yes, I was thinking the exact same about the limitations on the scale of your wedding. I really hated how she said "at this point". Oh I guess all mothers are condemned to the courthouse? There's nothing wrong with the courthouse, but It's absurd to think it's the only reasonable option when you have kids.

Congrats on your baby too! I get to find out what we are having this Tuesday!

CMGragain · June 2014

Congratulations on your wonderful news! Best wishes to you all for the future!

lovesclimbing · June 2014

I am praying no one touches my bump when H and I have kids. I don't even want my mom or my sisters rubbing my belly. I have a friend who had a "hands off the bump" t-shirt, and still randos would touch it.

photokitty · June 2014

RebeccaB88 said:

Angusaur said:

Oh, I remember a good one! I'm heavier, so it took me longer to show. But there was no denying that I was pregnant in my last trimester. I used to work at a college, registering the students for classes. This girl (approx 18-19) stared at my stomach and blurted pretty loud "You look pregnant". I just gave her the dirtiest look I could muster and said "I AM pregnant".
At least you were actually pregnant when you got that. I wasn't. That was one awkward post office line after that incident...

Ditto, that was the last time I ever put my gloves in the pockets of my high waisted peacoat. Jackass.

KatWAG · June 2014

lovesclimbing said:

I am praying no one touches my bump when H and I have kids. I don't even want my mom or my sisters rubbing my belly. I have a friend who had a "hands off the bump" t-shirt, and still randos would touch it.

So when I was pregnant I worked with a "belly toucher." I didnt know her well at all yet every time I saw her she would come at me with her hands extended for my belly. I would stop and back away and she just didnt get the hint. Finally, I started to avoid her completely. She was the same person who liked to tell me pregnancy horror stories. Some people have no tact.

KatieinBkln · June 2014

Someone should make a t-shirt with George Bluth in prison orange that says "NO TOUCHING!"

climbingsingle · June 2014

1. Congrats!

2. Your cousin sounds like a massive jerk. Good for you for saying something.

Back in 1982, I was 2 and my mom was pregnant with my brother. She was 32 years old and had already been married to my dad for 10 years. However, she looked extremely young. She was out with us at the mall and some woman came up to her and said, "You should be ashamed of yourself!" I still can't believe that actually happened. My poor mother just stood there dumbfounded.

beethery · June 2014

ClimbingBrideNY said:

1. Congrats!
2. Your cousin sounds like a massive jerk. Good for you for saying something.

Back in 1982, I was 2 and my mom was pregnant with my brother. She was 32 years old and had already been married to my dad for 10 years. However, she looked extremely young. She was out with us at the mall and some woman came up to her and said, "You should be ashamed of yourself!" I still can't believe that actually happened. My poor mother just stood there dumbfounded.

Something similar happened to my mom. She was 20 when she was pregnant with me (and unmarried for 4 months of her pregnancy. She got a LOT of judgy eyeballs. The best part was that after I was born, she'd STILL get judgy eyeballs, but my aunt (who was 15 at the time) would not, because she looked more 'mature'.

Shit's ridiculous.

theartistformerlyknownas · June 2014

I was a part-time nanny in college, and got SUPER judge eyeballs when I took the kids to the tumbling room or swim classes at the rec center, or stopped at the store for a juice on the way home. I was 19; they were 4 and 2. Don't know why it didn't seem to occur to people that I was the babysitter.

lkristenj · June 2014

@lolo883 - Totally understand that. My mom had me when she was 20 (my parents were high school sweethearts and married at 18). My sister came two years later. Then, when she was 36, we had a surprise sister. I was 17, my sister 15, when she was born. Occasionally we'd take her with us when shopping for groceries to give my mom a break or hold her while my mom was doing something. People always assumed that my sister or myself was the parent and my mom was the grandparent. Always. It's not crazy to have kids at 36, even if you do have two teenage daughters.

NYCBruin · June 2014

Ugh people are the worst. Also, here's a handy visual guide for anyone curious about when it's appropriate to ask a woman if she's pregnant:

theartistformerlyknownas · June 2014

raissyrais · June 2014

I cant believe people nowadays still think you need to be married to have kids! What the holy fig?!

sophhabobopha · June 2014

Ugh people are gross. I'm 20, and when I called my (estranged) dad to tell him he says,"You're not pregnant, are you?" Thanks dad.

JCbride2015 · June 2014

NYCBruin said:

Ugh people are the worst. Also, here's a handy visual guide for anyone curious about when it's appropriate to ask a woman if she's pregnant:

Yep, don't ever! I read an article a few years ago about this, and the author says she never asked women if they were pregnant. However, she thought she was safe at the office of her OB/GYN waiting on a prenatal appointment, when a visibly pregnant woman sat down next to her. The author asked the woman when she is due, and the woman said, "I gave birth two weeks ago."

photokitty · June 2014

I my a

NYCBruin said:

Ugh people are the worst. Also, here's a handy visual guide for anyone curious about when it's appropriate to ask a woman if she's pregnant:

Is there a chart that accounts for accusing friends who are passing on margaritas at happy hour???

NYCBruin · June 2014

photokitty said:

I my a

NYCBruin said:

Ugh people are the worst. Also, here's a handy visual guide for anyone curious about when it's appropriate to ask a woman if she's pregnant:

Is there a chart that accounts for accusing friends who are passing on margaritas at happy hour???

Oh gawd, I hate when I'm not drinking and people ask if I'm pregnant. And then press me on whatever excuse I give. The worst is the few times I've had health problems and been on medicine that doesn't play nice with alcohol.

"No thank you, just water for me"

"Oh my god, are you pregnant"

"Nope, just have to get up early tomorrow"

"Oh come on, one drink won't hurt"

"Nah, I'm really good, thanks though"

"You are SOOO pregnant"

"No, I'm actually on medication to treat [insert medical condition] that doesn't mix well with alcohol"

Awkward silence....

Right now is not the time to poke mama bear

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