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Etiquette

Entitled to invitation

So, my FI was cornered a little bit ago, and passively said that he will find out about the invitation by a girl that we know through a friend...

A little back story, this girl was here, we would see her through people and she works at the same place FI does. She is Romanian and her work / tourist visa expired so she went back to Romania. We arent even close enough to her that we said goodbye. We dont know her last name, or have her cell phone number.

So, now as the wedding comes closer people who are invited are talking about it, and she keeps making comments about where her invitation is. One of her co-workers apparently said "maybe she doesnt have your address" which she then said (Im not sure if it was to my FI or not) that he should bring it to work.

Ummmm..... at this point even if my FI was a dumb dumb (because I had gone over the "we are keeping the wedding an intimate event with close friends and family" script, and bean dip) and may have unintentionally made it seem like this girl is invited, I really am just so against giving her an invite.

Im not even sure what the etiquette is about this, but I feel like shes almost demanding an invite at this point. We are not friends, we casually talk when were at a mutual friends BBQ and thats it. I dont know your last name, I dont know your cell phone number, nothing. Just STOP.

We have been dealing with so many entitled to an invite people that FI has said some questionable things to people. ...and I just try to be as curtious as possible and bean dip.

I think this was a partial vent.

Re: Entitled to invitation

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I would just ignore her and her comments.

    d2va
  • wandajune6wandajune6 Chicago-ish member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    I'd ignore it at as well.

    I am confused though: did she go back to Romania or is she still working with your FI? It seems highly unlikely that she would come back for your wedding anyway. I'd also imagine that it would be hard to get a new visa.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    d2va
  • d2vad2va member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    I'd ignore it at as well.

    I am confused though: did she go back to Romania or is she still working with your FI? It seems highly unlikely that she would come back for your wedding anyway. I'd also imagine that it would be hard to get a new visa.
    Sorry if I wasnt clear lol (I was rage typing).

    She was here working in the office that FI works (car dealer). She was there for a few months and then her work / tourist visa was going to expire, or there was some issue (not friends - so dont know lol) with it.  So, apparently she left back to her country, and then randomly like a month ago she came back to the states and she is working again in the company.

    So, Im assuming she fixed the issue with her visa.


  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Ignore them.
    d2va
  • I think you need to find out from your FI if he has inadvertently extended a verbal invite (even if it was to get her to go away). If he did, I think you have to invite her, unfortunately. If not, try to ignore her and her ridiculousness. I'm sorry you have to deal with it either way.

    Who does this stuff? It's so embarrassing to be this desperate to attend weddings. I'm always cringing and embarrassed for these people - why are they not embarrassed for themselves?
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    BrandNewJ
  • d2vad2va member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    I think you need to find out from your FI if he has inadvertently extended a verbal invite (even if it was to get her to go away). If he did, I think you have to invite her, unfortunately. If not, try to ignore her and her ridiculousness. I'm sorry you have to deal with it either way.

    Who does this stuff? It's so embarrassing to be this desperate to attend weddings. I'm always cringing and embarrassed for these people - why are they not embarrassed for themselves?
    He said something along the lines of  "ill have to check with Danielle".

    I dont know who the hell does this stuff, I cringe at the thought of it really. AND every time that I hear someone who spoke to someone who is invited about being invited it horrible.

    I got a text message from a friend of mine who is invited about this too. Im going to type of what was in the messages just so you guys understand what Im dealing with, and so that we can cringe together.

    FRIEND: Hey how are you? I just wanted to tell you something, Walter is always talking about you, that you are so nice. He wishes you were working with us.

    ME: Im good, and Im glad something thinks Im nice hahaha
    (unsuspecting obviously)

    FRIEND: Anyways, he felt bad that you you didnt invite him to the wedding.

    ME: Oh god lol. Unfortunately we were unable to invite everyone.

    FRIEND: You dont have any more space to squeeze?

    ME: Unfortunately, no. Oscar did not invite a lot of people from PLACE OF WORK . People that he works with every day. We decided on people we have close relationships to and of course family.

    FRIEND: Oh, ok.

  • @d2va - that's pretty f-ing obvious. People are scrappy and have no manners... I cannot understand. My embarrassment for them even extends to their parents.
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  • d2vad2va member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    @d2va - that's pretty f-ing obvious. People are scrappy and have no manners... I cannot understand. My embarrassment for them even extends to their parents.
    I dont know if this is because I live in South Florida, and no one is really "American" BUT jesus.


  • I think you need to find out from your FI if he has inadvertently extended a verbal invite (even if it was to get her to go away). If he did, I think you have to invite her, unfortunately. If not, try to ignore her and her ridiculousness. I'm sorry you have to deal with it either way.

    Who does this stuff? It's so embarrassing to be this desperate to attend weddings. I'm always cringing and embarrassed for these people - why are they not embarrassed for themselves?
    I would ignore if possible as well. I made the mistake of inviting someone who cornered me and cried that she wanted to come. We had only one long farm house table for our 30-person wedding, and I made room for her, etc. She didn't show. In hindsight, I think she did it purposefully because she was pissed I didn't invite her and wanted to screw me over. Live and learn.
  • d2vad2va member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    To be honest, I dont even care if she would be offended or not, thats just how much we arent even friends. lol
  • beetherybeethery So sayeth the fuckin' Pope. member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    @d2va Walter needs to hit the fucking chill button on this guilt trip via mutual friends, and crazy lady needs to step the fuck off. Ignore both.
    --

    I'm the fuck out.

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    d2varajahmd
  • d2vad2va member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    beethery said:
    @d2va Walter needs to hit the fucking chill button on this guilt trip via mutual friends, and crazy lady needs to step the fuck off. Ignore both.
    Luckily, this is the only drama thats going on.

    Im flattered that they think Im going to have this awesome party, but do they really THINK about it, its a wedding. My parents / grandparents etc are going to be there.

    Its just so annoying. Im so over it though.
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