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Wedding Blues...the not so nice ones

SarahJ119SarahJ119 member
First Comment First Anniversary
in Wedding 911
So, I've done a really good job at being a calm, flexible bride even in the midst of some horrible events that would have crushed most other brides. (My venue closed and is refusing to refund our deposit 3 months before the wedding) I stayed so calm and level headed and was able to find a new venue the very same day, but now with less than two months to the big day I am starting to feel really overwhelmed. I feel like no one except my soon to be husband and our parents are the only ones who care, at all, about us and our wedding. I have 2 bridesmaids who still don't have dresses, my maid of honor (sister) is having to do all my bridal shower invites by her self cause my matron of honor is on a road trip. Two of my bridesmaids are going to be out of the state and miss my shower. I am having a wedding craft party next weekend and only 1 of my 5 bridesmaids has responded. I'm trying to not go all Solange Knowles on them but I am not feeling very loved by some of my best friends. I know we all have busy schedules and it's summer but it's my crunch time and I feel like the only way things are going to get done is if I do them. I know I should probably just tell them how I feel but I don't want to become a Bridezilla.

Am I the only one feeling this way? 
Has anyone found a way to relieve this feeling?
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Re: Wedding Blues...the not so nice ones

  • slothiegalslothiegal member
    First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited July 2014
    SarahJ119 said:
    So, I've done a really good job at being a calm, flexible bride even in the midst of some horrible events that would have crushed most other brides. (My venue closed and is refusing to refund our deposit 3 months before the wedding) I stayed so calm and level headed and was able to find a new venue the very same day, but now with less than two months to the big day I am starting to feel really overwhelmed. I feel like no one except my soon to be husband and our parents are the only ones who care, at all, about us and our wedding. I have 2 bridesmaids who still don't have dresses, my maid of honor (sister) is having to do all my bridal shower invites by her self cause my matron of honor is on a road trip. Two of my bridesmaids are going to be out of the state and miss my shower. I am having a wedding craft party next weekend and only 1 of my 5 bridesmaids has responded. I'm trying to not go all Solange Knowles on them but I am not feeling very loved by some of my best friends. I know we all have busy schedules and it's summer but it's my crunch time and I feel like the only way things are going to get done is if I do them. I know I should probably just tell them how I feel but I don't want to become a Bridezilla.

    Am I the only one feeling this way? 
    Has anyone found a way to relieve this feeling?
    Get yourself a margarita.  Talk to FI and enlist his help.

    It is an overwhelming process, but your BMs have their own lives going on and have no obligations other than to show up in their dresses, sober (well, for the most part).
    Anniversary

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  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited July 2014
    Your wedding may be the most important thing going on in your life right now, but that's not the case for your wedding party. Honestly, I'd decline a crafting party too. I'm not the least bit crafty. I barely want to do crafty things for my own wedding. 

    Have a glass of wine and relax. Your friends care about you, even if they're not able to make it to your events. 
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    You've crossed over into Pinterest/bridal TV show expectation territory with the crafting party. Ditto PPs. It's not that your friends don't care about you, but a lot of people are just not into a lot of wedding stuff. 


    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • SarahJ119SarahJ119 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    I can do all the "crafts" myself and honestly if nothing gets done that day I won't be heart broken. I guess I was just hoping to finally get them all together to tell them when they need to be places and other important things like that. It wouldn't be such an issue if they would just answer my calls/texts. And would you seriously turn down a free BBQ and booze with some of your best friends? I've known these girls for more than 20 years and done these same things for them. So that's why I'm a little frustrated. 

    The wine isn't helping.
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  • slothiegalslothiegal member
    First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    I mean, personally, no, I wouldn't turn down free food/booze.  But that's because I'm a fatty/wine-o.

    Seriously though, I know it's a bummer that your girls can't be there.  My BMs are all out of state, I haven't seen some of them since BEFORE I got engaged.  

    I called my MOH crying after I got my dress about how sad I couldn't share that moment with her in person.  But you know what?  She's still my BFF.  We've been through graduations, births, funerals, hospital visits, you name it.  My wedding is just another event in our friendship.  There's a good chance she won't be able to make it, because of health issues.  You know what?  We're still biffles and we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.  We call each other every week, catching up on the big things, the mundane, everything in between.  

    I know it can be frustrating.  But remember your loved ones still have their own world/battles going on.
    Anniversary

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  • jules3964jules3964 member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    SarahJ119 said:
    I can do all the "crafts" myself and honestly if nothing gets done that day I won't be heart broken. I guess I was just hoping to finally get them all together to tell them when they need to be places and other important things like that. It wouldn't be such an issue if they would just answer my calls/texts. And would you seriously turn down a free BBQ and booze with some of your best friends? I've known these girls for more than 20 years and done these same things for them. So that's why I'm a little frustrated. 

    The wine isn't helping.
    If they're not answering your calls/texts, I would just send an email to each of them with all those logistical details and be done with it. It's still well over a month away, so even if you told them all those things next weekend, they may have to be reminded again closer to the day anyway.
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  • KaurisKauris member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited July 2014
    SarahJ119 said:
    I can do all the "crafts" myself and honestly if nothing gets done that day I won't be heart broken. I guess I was just hoping to finally get them all together to tell them when they need to be places and other important things like that. It wouldn't be such an issue if they would just answer my calls/texts. And would you seriously turn down a free BBQ and booze with some of your best friends? I've known these girls for more than 20 years and done these same things for them. So that's why I'm a little frustrated. 

    The wine isn't helping.
    Yes, I would turn it down if it came with strings attached. Like having to do work for your wedding. Unfortunately weddings are not tit for tat. 

    And how many texts are you sending? I mean, shouldn't the invitations to the events and maybe one email be enough?


    ETA - Sorry, this was too long ago for you to care. Ugh. Duh
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