Wedding planning sucks already

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

Finally got past step 1 (picking the date) which is Oct 3rd 2015. I have been researching vendors and caterers, etc like crazy for the past few months and had a favorite venue picked out to visit within the next couple weeks. So I go to the website and the venue is unavailable for the ENTIRE months of September and October, 2015. Wow. Awesome. I didn't think you had to pick a venue more than a year in advance! Had I known it was so popular I would have planned accordingly but I had never even heard of this place! Hoping everything works out and happens for a reason, blahblahblah.

-Bummed.

doeydo · July 2014

What about November or another month? Are you open to changing your date? Also, it might help to look at unconventional venues, such as a museum or a zoo or something.

OliveOilsMom · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

Finally got past step 1 (picking the date) which is Oct 3rd 2015. I have been researching vendors and caterers, etc like crazy for the past few months and had a favorite venue picked out to visit within the next couple weeks. So I go to the website and the venue is unavailable for the ENTIRE months of September and October, 2015. Wow. Awesome. I didn't think you had to pick a venue more than a year in advance! Had I known it was so popular I would have planned accordingly but I had never even heard of this place! Hoping everything works out and happens for a reason, blahblahblah.

-Bummed.

September and October are becoming just as popular, if not more, than June. If you can, be flexible with your date. H & I knew we wanted to marry in March, so while we had an ideal date in mind, we also knew it wouldn't be the end of the world if we had to wait an extra week. We also needed to consider the scheduling of our Catholic Church in addition to the venue!

Most of the time, you should pick a venue and then the date that is available for that venue. That doesn't always work, if job, life, and your VIP attendees availability need to be considered.

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

We are flexible on our date but wanted late summer/early fall so we could be outdoors (we live in New England). I would say for the venue to be completely booked every weekend Fri-Sun for two months straight over a year ahead must be unusual?

JCbride2015 · July 2014

It's not that unusual for a popular venue. We booked 18 months in advance, and we actually didn't get our preferred date. They were available one month later so it was NBD, but this is actually fairly normal if you live in a busy area. Especially in New England, fall will be popular because the foliage is so pretty.

I'm sorry. Just because it's normal doesn't mean it sucks less. :-/

Can you get the last weekend in August or the first weekend in November? Those months might also be cheaper than Sep/Oct.

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

JCbride2015 said:

I'm sorry. Just because it's normal doesn't mean it sucks less. :-/

Can you get the last weekend in August or the first weekend in November? Those months might also be cheaper than Sep/Oct

The venue would be outdoors (tent) and I am just concerned about people's comfort. I do not want people sweating or freezing. Even mid-October I have been to weddings where the ceremony was miserable because everyone was shivering.

JCbride2015 · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

JCbride2015 said:

I'm sorry. Just because it's normal doesn't mean it sucks less. :-/

Can you get the last weekend in August or the first weekend in November? Those months might also be cheaper than Sep/Oct

The venue would be outdoors (tent) and I am just concerned about people's comfort. I do not want people sweating or freezing. Even mid-October I have been to weddings where the ceremony was miserable because everyone was shivering.

Yeah, I see. Where in New England? Would the end of August be reasonable?

Otherwise I think you've got to just look at a different venue.

beethery · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

JCbride2015 said:

I'm sorry. Just because it's normal doesn't mean it sucks less. :-/

Can you get the last weekend in August or the first weekend in November? Those months might also be cheaper than Sep/Oct

The venue would be outdoors (tent) and I am just concerned about people's comfort. I do not want people sweating or freezing. Even mid-October I have been to weddings where the ceremony was miserable because everyone was shivering.

YUP. And September weddings where the ceremony was comfortably warm/bordering on hot and then the reception was freezing cold!

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

Its booked for ALL of August as well. I have seriously never heard of this place before and it's an hour away from where I grew up. I have looked at so many venues and was excited that they allowed outside catering. A lot of other venues didn't fit in our budget and I have seriously looked at SO many online already. Extremely frustrating. Thanks for the suggestions, everyone. I guess I have to start over.

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 · July 2014

Booked solid? Or just every saturday is booked? You could get married on a Sunday, or Friday night.

huskypuppy14 · July 2014

I think it's pretty crazy that this place is booked every weekend for 3 months straight over a year from now. But I live in New England, and got married in June. Our venue coordinator said that October has become even more popular then June, and they are booked for 2-3 weddings per weekend every weekend this October. Whereas in June they only had 1 or 2 per weekend. It's crazy!

lc07 · July 2014

Wedding venues in my area but up WAY in advance. some even further than a year out. Especially for Saturdays. I'd recommend not setting a date until you have a venue selected, unless there is no other date that works for you and your FI and your VIPs. I had a 10 month engagement and ended up going with a Sunday since all the Saturdays were booked at the venue that worked best for us and our guests.

ElcaB · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

JCbride2015 said:

I'm sorry. Just because it's normal doesn't mean it sucks less. :-/

Can you get the last weekend in August or the first weekend in November? Those months might also be cheaper than Sep/Oct

The venue would be outdoors (tent) and I am just concerned about people's comfort. I do not want people sweating or freezing. Even mid-October I have been to weddings where the ceremony was miserable because everyone was shivering.

Does the venue have a Plan B for inclement weather? We were hoping for mid-September for our wedding, but our venue was booked solid. We opted for late October and are planning an outdoor ceremony. If it's too cold, though, we'll just move inside & have the ceremony in the reception space.

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

This venue rents the property for a two night minimum and there is only one wedding per weekend so yeah, it's booked fri-sun for Aug, Sept, and Oct. LOL. The indoor space is too small, and it's also a barn. Unfortunately I agreed to my FSIL's demand that we NOT get married in a barn because she wants a barn wedding and is waiting for her bf to propose. I probably should never have promised that since we have limited options.

climbingsingle · July 2014

So, your FSIL is not even engaged yet and she made you promise not not have a barn wedding because that's what she wants to do?

OliveOilsMom · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

This venue rents the property for a two night minimum and there is only one wedding per weekend so yeah, it's booked fri-sun for Aug, Sept, and Oct. LOL. The indoor space is too small, and it's also a barn. Unfortunately I agreed to my FSIL's demand that we NOT get married in a barn because she wants a barn wedding and is waiting for her bf to propose. I probably should never have promised that since we have limited options.

A thousand times no to the bolded! She can't "claim" a wedding location! Who cares if you both have barn weddings? That is so popular right now, she will probably be attending multiple ones before she even gets engaged. Which also reminds me, that you can't call dibs on something related to getting married, when you aren't even engaged! Even if you and FSIL end up getting married in the exact same place, the weddings will be totally different from each other! I think you need to just look for the location that suits you and FI best. As long as you can properly host all of your guests at your chosen venue, it can be in a barn, an industrial loft, church hall, or banquet facility.

wandajune6 · July 2014

We met with a florist this weekend and ordered our flowers. During the course of our conversation I learned that October has become the big month for weddings.

His explanation is that the weather has been so weird for the last few years that May and June have no longer had consistently good weather- and that October seems to be the perfect summer weather.

We came up with a handful of dates we liked before looking at venues. It's much easier to see what's available than to find something that fits more precise requirements.

falsara · July 2014

wandajune6 said:

We met with a florist this weekend and ordered our flowers. During the course of our conversation I learned that October has become the big month for weddings.

His explanation is that the weather has been so weird for the last few years that May and June have no longer had consistently good weather- and that October seems to be the perfect summer weather.

We came up with a handful of dates we liked before looking at venues. It's much easier to see what's available than to find something that fits more precise requirements.

SIB

That is very true, one of the reasons that me and FI decided on our venue at 22 Months to the wedding, is that he wants to have it on my Birthday. I think its great, but in order for us to guarantee that our vendors/ venues are available for that particular date we have to plan ahead by almost two years.

charlottesmom0626 · July 2014

girl, have your barn wedding if you want it. My FI's brother's girlfriend, upon hearing of our engagement, said "They better not get married before us!" Everyone gave her the crazy eye, and she still doesn't have a ring.

theartistformerlyknownas · July 2014

Definitely find a venue before you get your heart set on a date. The date matters so much less than the venue does. Find something you love, then see when they're available. I didn't want to get married on the 13th but it was the only day that worked for the venue FI had his heart set on, so be it.

And for a barn venue that allows outside catering for a fall date, I'm not surprised at all that they're booked so far out in advance. All super in-demand items right now.

Seriously, FSIL can't claim shit. Even if your weddings are in the same place it won't matter, but who's to say her tastes won't change between now and whenever she actually gets engaged?

And good luck!

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

I love her and I didn't mind because I don't really care much, but now that I'm realizing how limited my options are for my budget I may have to break that promise which sucks but if that does happen I will just have to explain and hope she understands. She's not a mean person I'm sure she would play it off like she was just kidding anyway.

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

I don't need a barn by any means I wanted to go for something "naturey" like a farm, garden, or field whatever works. I'm really not picky on the date I just want temperate weather so that people will be comfortable and I can't commit to spring 2015 because that's too soon so late summer/early fall seems to be the time to shoot for.

beethery · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

I don't need a barn by any means I wanted to go for something "naturey" like a farm, garden, or field whatever works. I'm really not picky on the date I just want temperate weather so that people will be comfortable and I can't commit to spring 2015 because that's too soon so late summer/early fall seems to be the time to shoot for.

I can suggest a few places in the Bedford/New Boston/Francestown/Goffstown areas if you'd like.

jenna8984 · July 2014

beethery said:

BlackLace2015 said:

I don't need a barn by any means I wanted to go for something "naturey" like a farm, garden, or field whatever works. I'm really not picky on the date I just want temperate weather so that people will be comfortable and I can't commit to spring 2015 because that's too soon so late summer/early fall seems to be the time to shoot for.

I can suggest a few places in the Bedford/New Boston/Francestown/Goffstown areas if you'd like.

I was going to say the same thing...what area are you in? Maybe we can help, I'm in central MA.

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

@beethery @jenna8984 Anything up to 2hrs away from central ma, preferably something in nh. preferably allowing outside catering, I haven't been too impressed with the meals/prices that most venues offer. looking for something for up to 150 people. Ceremony outside. Reception inside or outside. Somewhat rustic or garden.

beethery · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

@beethery @jenna8984 Anything up to 2hrs away from central ma, preferably something in nh. preferably allowing outside catering, I haven't been too impressed with the meals/prices that most venues offer. looking for something for up to 150 people. Ceremony outside. Reception inside or outside. Somewhat rustic or garden.

Alright @BlackLace2015, I'm going to see what all I can pull together locally for you.

I can tell you that New Boston and Francestown are about 25 minutes from Milford and about 45 minutes from the state line down by Costco and the Pheasant Lane Mall. They're rural but pretty accessible from the highways.

Goffstown is slightly further (15 minutes down the road from New Boston), and Bedford is west of Manchester (in between New Boston and Manch) and very, VERY nice. FSIL's crazy-ass sister is having her wedding at a farm in Greenfield. I know you're not exactly going in that direction, but I can get the information and direct you there if you'd like.

I know you're not specifically looking for a barn, but FSIL and FBIL had their wedding at the 4H grounds in New Boston last year. The barn wasn't quite complete (I think they were going to do more to the ceiling inside of it), but it was $800 to rent, had clean bathrooms down the walkway from it, and you could have whatever vendors you wanted there. If you can't find the number for those people online, I can get it for you from FSIL.

If you are REALLY fiending for a field, there is a small possibility that I can get you in touch with some landowners in Francestown with a couple of poop-free fields. I will say that navigating a bathroom situation for the field option might prove difficult, and I don't know how the landowners would feel about having something there. If you want that, I'll talk to them first and see how they feel about it before asking for their numbers for ya. That way if they're on the hell-no train I can let you know it ain't gonna happen.

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

beethery said:

BlackLace2015 said:

@beethery @jenna8984 Anything up to 2hrs away from central ma, preferably something in nh. preferably allowing outside catering, I haven't been too impressed with the meals/prices that most venues offer. looking for something for up to 150 people. Ceremony outside. Reception inside or outside. Somewhat rustic or garden.

Alright @BlackLace2015, I'm going to see what all I can pull together locally for you.

I can tell you that New Boston and Francestown are about 25 minutes from Milford and about 45 minutes from the state line down by Costco and the Pheasant Lane Mall. They're rural but pretty accessible from the highways.

Goffstown is slightly further (15 minutes down the road from New Boston), and Bedford is west of Manchester (in between New Boston and Manch) and very, VERY nice. FSIL's crazy-ass sister is having her wedding at a farm in Greenfield. I know you're not exactly going in that direction, but I can get the information and direct you there if you'd like.

I know you're not specifically looking for a barn, but FSIL and FBIL had their wedding at the 4H grounds in New Boston last year. The barn wasn't quite complete (I think they were going to do more to the ceiling inside of it), but it was $800 to rent, had clean bathrooms down the walkway from it, and you could have whatever vendors you wanted there. If you can't find the number for those people online, I can get it for you from FSIL.

If you are REALLY fiending for a field, there is a small possibility that I can get you in touch with some landowners in Francestown with a couple of poop-free fields. I will say that navigating a bathroom situation for the field option might prove difficult, and I don't know how the landowners would feel about having something there. If you want that, I'll talk to them first and see how they feel about it before asking for their numbers for ya. That way if they're on the hell-no train I can let you know it ain't gonna happen.

wow thanks I'll pm you!

luckya23 · July 2014

My coworker had her wedding at Santarella which looked so cool. I once stayed at the Publick House in Sturbridge when they were setting up for a wedding and that looked nice too.
I also found this link for you... http://www.rusticbride.com/category/massachusetts/page/2

BlackLace2015 · July 2014

Kelani23 said:

My coworker had her wedding at Santarella which looked so cool. I once stayed at the Publick House in Sturbridge when they were setting up for a wedding and that looked nice too. I also found this link for you... http://www.rusticbride.com/category/massachusetts/page/2

thanks I will check out that link. I've never heard of Santarella but I just went to the website and its really cool!

ashleyep · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

We are flexible on our date but wanted late summer/early fall so we could be outdoors (we live in New England). I would say for the venue to be completely booked every weekend Fri-Sun for two months straight over a year ahead must be unusual?

Not really. I'm getting married this weekend. When I started looking at venues last march (nearly 18 months out) one of the venues we looked at had only 3 or so Saturdays left all Summer. September and October are very popular times of the year for weddings in New England. My photographer starts getting busy in August and doesn't really stop until October.

ashleyep · July 2014

BlackLace2015 said:

@beethery @jenna8984 Anything up to 2hrs away from central ma, preferably something in nh. preferably allowing outside catering, I haven't been too impressed with the meals/prices that most venues offer. looking for something for up to 150 people. Ceremony outside. Reception inside or outside. Somewhat rustic or garden.

Try checking out Gibbet Hill in Groton. It's rustic, but very classy. We had some friends get married there in September a few years ago, it was gorgeous. 150 *might* be too many people though, not sure.

http://www.barnatgibbethill.com/weddings-events/

Wedding planning sucks already

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