So, one of the couples I invited to our wedding has recently sent in their decline to attend the wedding. My brother told me last Sunday at my wedding shower that the husband of the couple wants to attend but that the wife is boycotting because she disagrees with the wedding being on a Friday stating that it is rude to have a wedding on a weekday.
However, my brother explained that he plans on attending anyway without his wife.. So, I called him and asked if he will be coming or not so that I can let my caterer know to set a place for you and to ensure you have food and drink available to you. He explained he is not sure but will most likely attend the ceremony.. I kept asking if he will be attending the reception and he said no. I don't want to be rude, but I don't feel comfortable paying for his possible attendance at the reception if he decides to stay after the ceremony.
I've also caught wind that there will be some other folks who were not invited who plan to crash the wedding after the ceremony and I don't plan on paying for these folks as we can't afford it. Which unfortunately is the reason we were unable to invite these people in the first place. So, how do I explian to unvited guests they are not welcomed to stay at the reception? And no, I won't be hiring security.
Anyone experience situations like this before?
Re: Wedding Crashers
Also, ask your FI and brothers to pass the word (gently) to these people that you are unable to accommodate them at the wedding and that it would be very rude for them to show up uninvited.
WHOA. That is straight up not cool. Who is funding the wedding? I would have a SERIOUS come to Jesus meeting with your brother and explain that unless he is paying for your wedding, then he has NO RIGHT to encourage this.
I would seriously considering hiring security now that you mention this.
I'm the fuck out.
It's your wedding. Have it on a Friday if you want. If you have "friends" that are going to be petty like that, then they aren't really friends at all.
Call the supposed to be wedding crashers and tell them, honestly, "I do not have enough money to invite everyone I know. For this reason, I've limited my guest list to close friends and immediate family."
Certainly the OP can have her wedding anytime she likes, but even her closest friends may not be able to make it to her wedding if it's on a weekday, including Friday-or for that matter, any other time. It doesn't mean they're not good friends if that's the case. It just means that they can't make it.
And it's not a good idea to tell anyone who isn't invited or who RSVPs for people who aren't invited that the reason is because you couldn't afford it. They'll immediately offer to pay their own way. Everyone needs to accept that it's up to the hosts who gets invited, and that if one isn't invited, it's not appropriate to try to force one's way into someone else's event or home.