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October 2014 Weddings

I know it's an irrational feeling...

My 9 yr old FSD is super excited to be flowergirl and her dress is delivered for her to try on tomorrow. She asked FI if they can send a pic to her mom. He said yes.

I asked for a photo since I'll be a work. FI replied "I'm already sending one to Ex-wife"

I know I'm being overdramatic but I'm so overwhelmed with some things the past few days, it pissed me off that I was secondary thought. I'm honestly having dreams where his ex walks into the reception and disrupts everything. She did this very thing at FILS wedding anniversary a few years ago and at a christening last year so it's a possibility :(

Ok. Thanks for letting my vent. I know I'm being stupid over this

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Re: I know it's an irrational feeling...

  • Well, why would it be such a problem to send you the pic, too? Doesn't seem like too much to ask! I'm starting to be more irritable about the dumbest things, I can relate! I don't feel wedding stress but maybe I am and I don't realize it?
  • It was the "I'm ALREADY sending..." that bugged me. I know FI is just being nice but his ex is a miserable witch so it rubs me the wrong way. Especially since we've been together 5 years and his ex won't meet me. If I'm anywhere near her, she leaves the room, but she gets to share in our wedding? She wouldn't extend the same courtesy to FI.

    * sorry, I really dislike his ex. She's treated FI appallingly the last few years and uses their child as a weapon against him so her involvement, however small irks me :(

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  • That would piss me off too, and I'm the type of person that doesn't know how to keep my mouth shut, so I would let him know about it!  There's no reason he can't send you a picture too!!!


  • Dignity100Dignity100 Northeastern Ohio member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    I think that would tick just about anybody off!!

  • Thank you for not making me feeling crazy and irrational! :) I'm so glad I can vent and get things off my mind and you ladies don't judge :)

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  • The way he said it would piss me off, but the sending a picture to the exwife and not thinking to send one to you? I can *almost* see that happening, except since it's a dress for your wedding...I don't know. My youngest daughter is from my previous marriage, and I send pictures of her to her dad a couple times a week. I don't often remember/think to send them to my fiance if he's not around at picture time, even if it is for the wedding. When I got her flower girl dress, I immediately took a picture and sent it to XH and my mom, but not to fiance. I had her model again when he got home.
    I'm ramble-y...sorry! The way he said would definitely rub me the wrong way. Did he end up sending it to you?
  • Lowell14Lowell14 member
    Fifth Anniversary 100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    edited August 2014
    @kebab, thank you for that perspective. If it wasn't wedding related, I don't think (but cant say for certain) that I would be annoyed. He did send me a pic of the dress and then they went for shoes...that was a 2hour adventure for FI that he never wants to relive lol. He also brought it all home so I have it with my dress for the day of the wedding. (I was also worried that if the Ex-wife had FSD outfit, some or all wouldn't make it...accidentally or on purpose :)...) There's the irrational thoughts again, putting stock into situations that most likely wont occur! ETA: Why cant I have paragraphs?

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