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HELP Missing RSVPs!

christinethebean88christinethebean88 member
First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
in Wedding 911
So our RSVP date has come and gone and our venue needs a firm number from us very soon.  We have heard from everyone on my side of the family, but we have about 20 people on my FI's side who have not responded.  We've tried calling (lots of disconnected phones, or we leave voicemails and get no response), e-mail, Facebook, EVERYTHING to try and get in contact with these people, but to no avail.  His mother and sister have told us that these people tend to be flaky and they aren't surprised (but aren't being particularly helpful about it either).  I'm at a loss at this point!  Should I just call or e-mail again and inform them that since I haven't heard from them I'm marking them down as a no, so we won't have a seat for them?  Is that rude?  As much as it annoys me that these people are being so flaky, I would like them to come because I feel bad for my FI (I have about 70 people coming, right now his side adds up to some friends and his very immediate family).  What should I do?
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Re: HELP Missing RSVPs!

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    janbride2015janbride2015 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment Name Dropper
    Call them back.  If no one answers leave the message "hey (insert name) I have not received an RSVP back from you and I need to provide a head count to our caterers.  If I don't hear from you by tonight I'll have to mark you down as a no. I do hope to hear from you."
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    atlastmrsgatlastmrsg member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary Name Dropper
    When I reached RSVP date, I had all but three of my RSVPs.  I was missing HALF of FI's.  I thought I'd lose my mind.  His sister asked if I needed help with anything, so I had her call everyone.  It def took calling them to shake down answers.
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    MW5280MW5280 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    This is my life right now!

    Our RSVP deadline is Monday. We're still missing 25 families and 90% of those are FI's relatives. 

    I might be on the phone a lot next week.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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    holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    christinethebean88 said:

    So our RSVP date has come and gone and our venue needs a firm number from us very soon.  We have heard from everyone on my side of the family, but we have about 20 people on my FI's side who have not responded.  We've tried calling (lots of disconnected phones, or we leave voicemails and get no response), e-mail, Facebook, EVERYTHING to try and get in contact with these people, but to no avail.  His mother and sister have told us that these people tend to be flaky and they aren't surprised (but aren't being particularly helpful about it either).  I'm at a loss at this point!  Should I just call or e-mail again and inform them that since I haven't heard from them I'm marking them down as a no, so we won't have a seat for them?  Is that rude?  As much as it annoys me that these people are being so flaky, I would like them to come because I feel bad for my FI (I have about 70 people coming, right now his side adds up to some friends and his very immediate family).  What should I do?

    This was dh's family, too. Agree with Janbride ... but give them a day. And good for enlisting fmil.




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    Car2992Car2992 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    I am in the same boat!!! My RSVP date was today and most of mine are in, almost NONE of my FI! I hope his friends will come out for him :-/
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    ReginaLambert13ReginaLambert13 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Comment
    I plan to put my RSVP date WAY before I actually need them (too late for that I know!) but then to start calling people pretty early.  If I haven't heard from them a week before I need to know I will just leave them a message saying that we have to have firm counts and so while we really hope they can be there if we haven't heard back from them by X (probably the next day) we will have to mark them down as not coming so we don't leave spaces empty and pay for meals that go uneaten.  I think at that point if you have given them plenty of time and left messages before you just have to go for the uber direct approach.
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    wrigleyvillewrigleyville member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    ReginaLambert13 said:
    I plan to put my RSVP date WAY before I actually need them (too late for that I know!) but then to start calling people pretty early.  If I haven't heard from them a week before I need to know I will just leave them a message saying that we have to have firm counts and so while we really hope they can be there if we haven't heard back from them by X (probably the next day) we will have to mark them down as not coming so we don't leave spaces empty and pay for meals that go uneaten.  I think at that point if you have given them plenty of time and left messages before you just have to go for the uber direct approach.
    First of all, please stop dragging up old threads.

    Second, this is not how you handle RSVPs. If people don't respond by the due date, you give the mail a couple more days (some people wait until the last minute) and THEN call.

    If you call them before they're even due, you come off as a bridezilla.
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    IamnowmrsjmsIamnowmrsjms member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    Apparently wrigley is TK police-watch out!
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    tammym1001tammym1001 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    disaiak said:
    Apparently wrigley is TK police-watch out!
    She's a moderator so she kind of is like TK police.
    image
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    ViczaesarViczaesar member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    disaiak said:
    Apparently wrigley is TK police-watch out!
    Are you drunk?



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