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Save the date needed?

Knottie81642829Knottie81642829 member
5 Love Its First Comment
edited September 2014 in Wedding Invitations & Paper
Hi I'm new to this forum and need a little help. I'm planning an intimate wedding with max 40 of our closest family and friends. Most are couples so about 20 invitations. We will have a ceremony followed by a sit down dinner, then cocktails and marshmallows by a fire pit. Everything will be in the same location. Do I still need to send save the date cards? how far in advance if so? Thank you. 
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Re: Save the date needed?

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    theartistformerlyknownastheartistformerlyknownas member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    Save the dates are never necessary. They're a relatively recent invention and people managed just fine for hundreds of years without them. Especially since you have such an intimate list, you can spread your date pretty easily via word of mouth or just call them all and say "we're getting married on (date), expect a formal invitation in (month!)!"
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    southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    If you decide to send save the dates, they go out 6-10 months before the wedding. Closer to 6 if everyone's local, closer to 10 if people are overseas/OOT.

    They're not necessary. I'd just make sure your VIPs know when it is so they can plan. Email is fine.
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    Knottie81642829Knottie81642829 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    Thanks for your reply. Most ppl invited are on fb. Will it be okay to create a fb event invite?
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    PineapplePopsiclesPineapplePopsicles member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    Knottie81642829 said:
    Thanks for your reply. Most ppl invited are on fb. Will it be okay to create a fb event invite?
    No!  Don't do this.  Your wedding is a special event, and deserves much more than a fb event invite.
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    theartistformerlyknownastheartistformerlyknownas member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    Knottie81642829 said:
    Thanks for your reply. Most ppl invited are on fb. Will it be okay to create a fb event invite?
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    Knottie81642829Knottie81642829 member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    NOOO I didn't mean not send regular invites. I meant to create a save the date event. I WILL send my invites by mail too.
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    Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    When it comes to social media, the best thing you can do is not discuss your wedding on it.

    People on social media make assumptions about whether or not they're invited or are welcome to tell it like they think it is about wedding information posted there, and justified or not, one or both sides often end up with hurt feelings.  So don't create a save-the-date event for your wedding on Facebook.
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    Knottie81642829Knottie81642829 member
    5 Love Its First Comment

    I won't do that then, even though the event would have been a private event and only ppl invited could see it. Honestly I don't think anybody's feelings will be hurt because we are inviting all of our VIPs so anyone else shouldn't expect to be invited. BUT if anyone was to get offended I could care less because unfortunately I can't please everyone and there's always that one person not matter what.

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    holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited September 2014
    Knottie81642829 said:

    I won't do that then, even though the event would have been a private event and only ppl invited could see it. Honestly I don't think anybody's feelings will be hurt because we are inviting all of our VIPs so anyone else shouldn't expect to be invited. BUT if anyone was to get offended I could care less because unfortunately I can't please everyone and there's always that one person not matter what.


    Yeah, that's not a good attitude to have.  Sure, you can't please everyone.  And, that's not a cop-out for not caring if people get offended.  Seriously, though, keep wedding talk off Facebook.  I got a Facebook save-the-date for a wedding and I found it to be tacky as hell.




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    Knottie81642829Knottie81642829 member
    5 Love Its First Comment

    Yeah I never use fb for any event before or post anything very personal. I'm currently planning a 1st birthday party and even for that I sent the cutest invites by mail. I like making my guests feel very special so I even customized the envelopes. I guess I should just send save the dates for the wedding by mail.

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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Just don't send STDates. Just call the people you're planning on inviting and give them a verbal date to save.
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    MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    You can PM your friends individually on FB to give them the date, but it's awfully impersonal.  These are your 40 closest friends and family.  Can't you just call them?
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