OOOOOOOOH MY GOSH. Wow. Anything really does go here. Yeah, the no teeth thing is definitely a game changer (I almost said gang changer...I'm drinking too). FI is the only guy to ever go down on me but I always thought "no chance of him biting/scraping me...winner winner chicken dinner."
And no, I have not had the D. But we should all agree to get the D on my wedding night. 10/11. Do it for me. (Literally.) (Puns.) (Alcohol.) (I need sleep.)
We will be having one-year-til-we're-married secks. So yes. We will definitely do it on your wedding night.
And this is why I need to be online more at night....
For the person (I lost who this was) that said going solo didn't work for them:
Hitachi Magic Wand.
Thank me later.
I'll go ahead and second that. Also - explore the attachments.
Based on this thread, I feel like the only female on the planet who gets squicked out by getting oral.
Eh, it's alright, but I almost never request it, and he's more than willing to give it to me. I definitely prefer other things. So I'm (almost) right there with you.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
I have. With my ex it wasnt as bad because he was less endowed then FI. with FI we tried it and it was REALLY uncomfortable and I told him if he wanted to go forward with this, we need to work up to it. Hes like "mehh.. its ok, no need" and i am like SWEET!
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
LMAO at the bolded. It totally does.
Yet... once I get over that... I don't hate it. Shocking, I know, for as much of a prude as I've probably made myself out to be. FI has no interest in it though so it's a moot point.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
I've only managed it really porn star successful once. I was very drunk, but was on top and in control of it so I wouldn't let it hurt.
Another it was passable.
The other times, I feel similar to you. I know I've done it before, so I'm like why can't I do it again??
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
LMAO at the bolded. It totally does.
Yet... once I get over that... I don't hate it. Shocking, I know, for as much of a prude as I've probably made myself out to be. FI has no interest in it though so it's a moot point.
You can get over it....
It's definitely a situation where smaller is better though. I got lucky though- FI likes the idea of it but prioritizes it so low that it never happens- why put it there when there are so many more fun places to put it?
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
LMAO at the bolded. It totally does.
Yet... once I get over that... I don't hate it. Shocking, I know, for as much of a prude as I've probably made myself out to be. FI has no interest in it though so it's a moot point.
FI jokingly asks for it all the time because he knows I'm going to make faces and say something crazy in response. He wants to do it because he's never done it, but he's resolved himself to the fact that it is probably never going to happen.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
LMAO at the bolded. It totally does.
Yet... once I get over that... I don't hate it. Shocking, I know, for as much of a prude as I've probably made myself out to be. FI has no interest in it though so it's a moot point.
FI jokingly asks for it all the time because he knows I'm going to make faces and say something crazy in response. He wants to do it because he's never done it, but he's resolved himself to the fact that it is probably never going to happen.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
Nope, can't do it. Hate it. Have tried it with exes and now refuse to do it with FI. I cannot get over the "pooping backwards" feeling. And it always hurts. Maybe someday, if I'm very drunk, I will let FI try and hope to hell that it satisfies his curiosity lol.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
Nope, can't do it. Hate it. Have tried it with exes and now refuse to do it with FI. I cannot get over the "pooping backwards" feeling. And it always hurts. Maybe someday, if I'm very drunk, I will let FI try and hope to hell that it satisfies his curiosity lol.
I've actually done it a few times and even though it's quite uncomfortable at first, it gets better as you start to relax. Well, last time we did it (was probably 3 years) as he came out, I'm afraid to say I...ahem...pooped a little. But I mean a little TINY bit!!!! Nobody freaked out and FI thought it was really funny. Haven't really done it since. Juste make sure that your anal cavity is completely clean before venturing there. Or try a finger or two first.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
Nope, can't do it. Hate it. Have tried it with exes and now refuse to do it with FI. I cannot get over the "pooping backwards" feeling. And it always hurts. Maybe someday, if I'm very drunk, I will let FI try and hope to hell that it satisfies his curiosity lol.
I've actually done it a few times and even though it's quite uncomfortable at first, it gets better as you start to relax. Well, last time we did it (was probably 3 years) as he came out, I'm afraid to say I...ahem...pooped a little. But I mean a little TINY bit!!!! Nobody freaked out and FI thought it was really funny. Haven't really done it since. Juste make sure that your anal cavity is completely clean before venturing there. Or try a finger or two first.
I love when men don't get freaked out about bodily functions.. it means they are your soul mate...
FI and i routinely have the sechsay times on my cycle and sometimes he comes out looking like a murder scene and hes just like "meh" and goes and jumps in the shower.
I can't get into anal either. At all. I tried to try it with an ex and stopped him like a centimeter in. H is a big dude and the thought of that thing in my poor little pooper is terrifying. He's sad, but has accepted the fact that never again will he have anal sex.
I hated it prior to FI but now it's not terrible as long as it's once in a while and I have to be extremely turned on!
I would recommend maybe a drink or two but don't do it if you're sloshed. That could be bad.
FI is so gentle and takes his time and doesn't rush me. MOST IMPORTANTLY, if I say, "ow" or "no," all anal play stops until I tell him to go ahead. Most times I just can't and he never pushes me or has a hissy fit. My ex-h did that and it made it all horrible.
DH isn't exactly endowed (I've never admitted that to anyone!). I've asked him about toys once and he isn't interested in that (says he likes it to be just us). Any suggestions as to how seksay times can be more enjoyable for me?
@msstaticfancypants The first ex I tried it with was awful about getting pissy over having to stop. He would make me feel so awful if I didn't want to continue and would pout the rest of the night. The next ex did the same, but not to the extent the first one did. FI would never, ever do anything like that, so maybe one day I will let him try and have a go at it.
I can not get into anal. At all. I've tried it multiple times, and NONE WERE EVEN REMOTELY GOOD.
No matter how much lube I use, it always feels like pooping backwards, or like someone is making a valiant attempt at parking a coach bus in the opening of a coke can.
Am I alone in this?????
SIB
It's not my favorite, but I've been known to enjoy it if I'm in the right mood (read: drunk). However, I think DH is the one man in the world who's not into it. He's like, "....why do I want to put my doodlebanger where your poop comes out? I DON'T GET IT." Which is fine by me.
@msstaticfancypants The first ex I tried it with was awful about getting pissy over having to stop. He would make me feel so awful if I didn't want to continue and would pout the rest of the night. The next ex did the same, but not to the extent the first one did. FI would never, ever do anything like that, so maybe one day I will let him try and have a go at it.
SITB
I hated the way he made me feel about it. He was such a jerk though. I've said in another thread that he was a porn addict and he just ruined so much in me that I had to get back. When I met ex-h, I was so sexually confident and he just destroyed that. Since FI is completely the opposite of him, I'm getting that confidence back.
DH isn't exactly endowed (I've never admitted that to anyone!). I've asked him about toys once and he isn't interested in that (says he likes it to be just us). Any suggestions as to how seksay times can be more enjoyable for me?
A lot of guys are threatened by the idea of toys. I've noticed that the smaller the guy, the more threatened he is. Or at least until he tries- then it takes some pressure off, I think.
I'd start by bringing in props rather than toys. That's a safe, easy way to open things up to new ideas. Once he's comfy with that, toys might be more accepted.
Also, hands and tongues.
One of the best lovers I've ever had was tiny. But he was super eager-to-please. It was ridiculous.
Thanks, @wandajune6. He's getting better with hands, but he can't / won't use tongue. He claims to have a bad gag reflex. He is definitely eager to please, though!
I'm going to be completely honest with ya'll... FI was a virgin when we got together. He was very shy, and very scared of hurting me because hes... above average. But dang was he good at what he does, even without having done it before.
He won't use his hands because he insists he will smell like "lady juice" and everyone will know, even after he washes his hands.
I'm going to be completely honest with ya'll... FI was a virgin when we got together. He was very shy, and very scared of hurting me because hes... above average. But dang was he good at what he does, even without having done it before.
He won't use his hands because he insists he will smell like "lady juice" and everyone will know, even after he washes his hands.
Um, what the hell does he think you smell like down there?? (Giving you the benefit of the doubt that you do not, in fact, smell like anything.)
I'm going to be completely honest with ya'll... FI was a virgin when we got together. He was very shy, and very scared of hurting me because hes... above average. But dang was he good at what he does, even without having done it before.
He won't use his hands because he insists he will smell like "lady juice" and everyone will know, even after he washes his hands.
Lady Juice smells like Lady Juice...he will need to get used to that because he will have to use his hands at some point. Variety is the spice of life! What does he think, Cock Juice is odourless and tasteless? Hihi....
@sarahbear31: Jeez what is it with these guys and smells? Are they 5? Of course there are smells, but it's only natural. Try to ask him if he's ready to try oral on you right after you've showered with daisy and roses shower gel?
FI has a nice set of restraints. Not, like, expensive leather, high quality ones, but ones that are actual restraints made for... ........ well. They're not neckties and karate belts. The problem is that despite the fact that he has them, and despite the fact that he KNOWS I want to use them... he's never decided to use them.
What, pray tell, might I do to... encourage... these particular items to make an entrance into our fun times? I've thought about just putting on my (one, crappy, red) corset thingy and tying myself up a few minutes before he gets home, but I can't quite get myself to do it. (I have straight-up asked for us to use it... but then we... forget....)
Re: It's TMI time (there is so much more than BC going on in here)
I'm the fuck out.
Another it was passable.
The other times, I feel similar to you. I know I've done it before, so I'm like why can't I do it again??
It's definitely a situation where smaller is better though. I got lucky though- FI likes the idea of it but prioritizes it so low that it never happens- why put it there when there are so many more fun places to put it?
I'm the fuck out.
Nope, can't do it. Hate it. Have tried it with exes and now refuse to do it with FI. I cannot get over the "pooping backwards" feeling. And it always hurts. Maybe someday, if I'm very drunk, I will let FI try and hope to hell that it satisfies his curiosity lol.
*raises hand
I'm the fuck out.
DH isn't exactly endowed (I've never admitted that to anyone!). I've asked him about toys once and he isn't interested in that (says he likes it to be just us). Any suggestions as to how seksay times can be more enjoyable for me?
I'd start by bringing in props rather than toys. That's a safe, easy way to open things up to new ideas. Once he's comfy with that, toys might be more accepted.
Also, hands and tongues.
One of the best lovers I've ever had was tiny. But he was super eager-to-please. It was ridiculous.
He won't use his hands because he insists he will smell like "lady juice" and everyone will know, even after he washes his hands.
FI has a nice set of restraints. Not, like, expensive leather, high quality ones, but ones that are actual restraints made for... ........ well. They're not neckties and karate belts.