I still remember years after a wedding that the bride and groom did not greet everyone. They did the mingling/you had to find them to say hello. I literally didn't get a chance to speak to either of them the entire day because I couldn't get to them on the dance floor. I said bye to the groom on our way out but only because I managed to finally catch him at the bar.
You might miss someone if you don't do table visits or a receiving line, and they will likely be hurt. My family travelled from about 8 hours away to that wedding and as we are their family members, I was really surprised and felt ignored the whole time. They focused on partying with their friends.
Find a way to ensure you greet all of your guests.
I went to a wedding like this, too. The B&G were mingling with their bridal party during most of the reception instead of visiting tables. I also traveled in for this wedding and was annoyed by this.
Sorry, if you want to invite 200 people to your wedding you need to talk to them.
My husband and I went to part of our cocktail hour and were able to greet and talk with some people, but no where near all, and we only had 110 people.
We had stations and our server got our food for us so we could start table visits. We had our salad right after toasts, and then we started going to tables. We went to the older couple's first, because they would be less likely to be out on the dance floor later. Also, there was an entire table that we talked to at cocktail hour, so we didn't make it to their table during the night. But since we had already said hello to them earlier, and some were also on the dance floor, it was fine that we didn't physically go to their table to say hello.
You have to make an effort to talk to everyone. If you miss a few people it's not the end of the world, but you have to try.
My cousin and his wife were barely at their table because their daughter was fussing too much. I never said hi to them at the wedding. However, they did stay over, so were able to talk to them in the morning.
We also did table visits during dinner. We ate quickly, then hit up each table while guests were still enjoying their meals. It worked out great, we were able to talk to everyone, and only took about 20-30 minutes tops. People understand that you can only spend a few minutes at each table, but they will really appreciate the gesture.
I just wanted to point out another flaw in the "we'll do it at cocktail hour" - if there is travel and you're expecting people to probably check into their hotel during that time period, there's a good chance not everyone will BE at the cocktail hour when you're there. There may be a long line at the hotel (I nearly missed a friend's ceremony because there were 40 people in line checking in and two employees working). Or they may have decided to head to the hotel for a breather and skip cocktail hour and come back for dinner. Or just general mingling and maybe roaming around the grounds of the reception space will make it hard to keep track.
Also, you need to ditch the "anyone else who wants to see me can find me" thought. That isn't what the reception is about. It's not a party where 200 just bask in your presence and celebrate you in all your glory - the reception is about you "receiving" them for the first time as a married couple and providing hospitality and thanks for attending your ceremony. So hunting down each and every single one of them to personally receive them and thank them is not optional.
Reception lines are the easiest because 1) You know your aren't going to miss anyone as they are lined up, and 2) You stand as a barrier between them and food (and possibly booze) so people aren't as likely to linger and chit chat (especially when they see a long line of people behind them waiting for their turn).
Table visits are also possible - but as someone else said, it's easier if you have a coordinator to help you keep track and keep thing on schedule.
My plan is to join everyone at cocktail hour and make my rounds there to say hello. This means no receiving line and no visiting tables (other then to the elderly who may not be up and about). Anyone else who wants to see me can still come up to me at any time or preferably find me on the dance floor. The past few weddings I have been to the couples did not come to the tables (some were not even at the cocktail hour at all and also did not have a receiving line). However, my mom and grandmom are appalled at my plans. My mom even said her and my dad are expected to go to all of the tables (what??). I am having about 200 people and one friend told me it took her about 45 minutes to visit all the tables. I'm sure the day will be a blur and I want to enjoy it, not spend 1/4th of the reception walking around to tables.
Summary: Do I have to visit every table during the reception?
Yes, assuming you haven't already spoken to every single guest at a table.
OP, I'm glad you decided to explore some alternative receiving line options. I think that's a great solution.
FI and I just decided on a receiving line ourselves last night, in part because in figuring out how long table visits would be for our 220 guests, he snarked "we could always just do like M & K did last month, and not talk to any damn body. I heard people were pissed." They had used the "people can just find us if they want to talk to us" method No. People already CAME TO YOUR WEDDING, they shouldn't have to keep fighting for your attention.
Personally, the idea of a receiving line seems just terrible to me. It seems so forced, just standing there and saying hello as you walk by, essentially. Table visits seem so much more like regular mingling, especially because you can essentially greet your guests as groups instead of individuals. Of course you need to greet everyone, but a nice hello as they sit at their table seems so much better to me as opposed to the awkward standing in line. But that's just me.
But really, isn't the mingling with your guests really what the reception is all about? I'm looking forward to it! Yes, there's going to be some tables I don't particularly want to spend a lot of time at (i.e. the people you "had to invite", or the groom's family that you don't really know). But out of 45 minutes of table visits, I'm willing to suck it up for the 20 minutes at those tables. I mean, I assume people will be nice to me and tell me I look pretty, so how bad can it be?
Are receiving lines typically done as everyone is in line to get their food? At the church post ceremony? Or how does this work excatly? I'm trying to think of a wedding where a bride and groom have had a receiving line, and I can't think of one that I have been to with a receiving line. It sounds like a great idea to me, I'm just now sure how people normally do it.
I remember one where the bride and groom stood in the narthex (lobby) of the church to greet everyone as they exited the sanctuary. I think both sets of parents also stood there thanking everyone for coming. The bridesmaids and groomsmen stood nearby so they could also greet anyone they knew. It was kinda cool.
We did a receiving line - it was super quick, too. Since we exited the ceremony space before everyone else, we just stood next to the opening and shook hands or hugged people as they walked past. Lots of people were happily chatting away with each other. I think we got through our line in only a couple of minutes (75 guests). We did follow up with longer table visits during the cocktail hour, though.
I remember one where the bride and groom stood in the narthex (lobby) of the church to greet everyone as they exited the sanctuary. I think both sets of parents also stood there thanking everyone for coming. The bridesmaids and groomsmen stood nearby so they could also greet anyone they knew. It was kinda cool.
That is the usual way. I have seen one other time the bride stand in the hall and have a receiving line as the guests go from the cocktail room the reception room.
SITB
I do think that's neat, I guess most of the weddings I have been to the couple has just greeted everyone at their tables, and now that I think about it there have been several that I have been to where I have actually had to seek THEM out... more than I realized have been that way actually.. But I like the idea of a receiving line or going from table to table. I think it's important to thank each and every guest for coming. It shows that you really care that they came.
We had our ceremony and reception at the same venue (same room!), so this worked really well for us. Once we had the ceremony, we filled out on to a covered veranda and received our guests as they exited the room. The staff needed 15 mins to change the room over, so we used this 15 mins to chat with our guests. We had a much smaller guest list than you (70 people- but everyone made it through the "line" in less than 15). Then cocktail hour started and guests moved back into the room.
So you could do a receiving line a) upon exiting the ceremony, b) upon entering the cocktail hour space, c) upon entering the reception space.
At my cousin's wedding, the receiving line was upon entering the reception space- they had 140 guests and it still did not take very long at all! (Less than half an hour)
At our wedding we also had time in between courses to do some table visits- guests weren't getting up, except to use the bathroom or go to the bar, so it worked out quite well actually and we could chat with people for a few minutes. We had no issues having time to eat our own meal either.
I hate a line. So, I'm one of those people who will see the receiving line of people trying to enter the cocktail venue, will skip the line, go in and get my cocktail, then head back outside to get in line. So, if you're worried about the line getting too long, hopefully you'll have obnoxious friends like me who will make it work.
Thanks for all the input I am just coming back to see it now I'm going to talk to my FI about when we can do a line and then we will probably also do some table visits for more elderly guests just because they won't really see us again much throughout the night since they won't be up and about.
I personally hate receiving lines and think they are awkward even as a guest. We did all the pictures before so we could do most of our greetings at cocktail hour. We tried to stop by tables too to catch people we missed, but everyone started wandering outside to watch the sunset. In the end we sort of had to track people down to say hello and thanks for coming, so it was a bit of a task. Although it led to some much funnier converations with some people that were a few drinks in. I think you can probably forgo planned rounds, but it may be more effort. If you think it's more fun that way and you catch up with all your guests at some point, I don't see an issue with it.
I personally hate receiving lines and think they are awkward even as a guest. We did all the pictures before so we could do most of our greetings at cocktail hour. We tried to stop by tables too to catch people we missed, but everyone started wandering outside to watch the sunset. In the end we sort of had to track people down to say hello and thanks for coming, so it was a bit of a task. Although it led to some much funnier converations with some people that were a few drinks in. I think you can probably forgo planned rounds, but it may be more effort. If you think it's more fun that way and you catch up with all your guests at some point, I don't see an issue with it.
Which you wouldn't have had to do if you'd had a receiving line.
I didn't read the entire thread but I will just add my experience. At our wedding we did table visits. It took about an hour for 130 guests (12 tables) so about 5 minutes a table. Yes, an hour may seem like a lot to you now, but it really isn't. We did it while people were finishing up their dinners so 98% of the guests were seated (And really what are you planning on doing once you have eaten your dinner, since the couple is typically served first, and your other guests are still eating? Just sit there and look at everyone?). Once the last table was hit we signaled to our DJ to start up the dancing and from that point on I was out on the dance floor with friends and family enjoying the rest of our reception (a full 3 hours).
I personally hate receiving lines and think they are awkward even as a guest. We did all the pictures before so we could do most of our greetings at cocktail hour. We tried to stop by tables too to catch people we missed, but everyone started wandering outside to watch the sunset. In the end we sort of had to track people down to say hello and thanks for coming, so it was a bit of a task. Although it led to some much funnier converations with some people that were a few drinks in. I think you can probably forgo planned rounds, but it may be more effort. If you think it's more fun that way and you catch up with all your guests at some point, I don't see an issue with it.
Which you wouldn't have had to do if you'd had a receiving line.
Might be awkward, but at least it gets done.
I still liked the route we chose more than the receiving line. The receiving line couldn't have really worked for us anyway the way the venue was set up, since cocktail hour was about 4ft away from the ceremony. It was just way more fun for us to catch up with everyone more naturally and made for good dancing breaks.
I say to each their own as long as you get to everyone at some point!
We didn't do table visits or a receiving line at our ceremony. We were still able to visit and talk with everyone, but we only had 35 people at our wedding. There's no way we could have done that with a bigger guest list. I think receiving lines are the most efficient way to make sure you get to talk to everyone.
We did a receiving line. We had both ceremony and reception at a large church. So we stood in the hallway between the sanctuary and the room where the reception was and everyone filed by. It didn't take that long (around 100 guests), maybe 20 minutes?
Re: Do I have to visit all tables?
Also, you need to ditch the "anyone else who wants to see me can find me" thought. That isn't what the reception is about. It's not a party where 200 just bask in your presence and celebrate you in all your glory - the reception is about you "receiving" them for the first time as a married couple and providing hospitality and thanks for attending your ceremony. So hunting down each and every single one of them to personally receive them and thank them is not optional.
Reception lines are the easiest because 1) You know your aren't going to miss anyone as they are lined up, and 2) You stand as a barrier between them and food (and possibly booze) so people aren't as likely to linger and chit chat (especially when they see a long line of people behind them waiting for their turn).
Table visits are also possible - but as someone else said, it's easier if you have a coordinator to help you keep track and keep thing on schedule.
I'm the fuck out.
I still liked the route we chose more than the receiving line. The receiving line couldn't have really worked for us anyway the way the venue was set up, since cocktail hour was about 4ft away from the ceremony. It was just way more fun for us to catch up with everyone more naturally and made for good dancing breaks.
I say to each their own as long as you get to everyone at some point!