Most embarrassing thing you have done?

themuffinman16 · September 2014

Just thinking I should even out the score card. My list is a mile longer than H. I will always remember this. I thought this guy in high school was super cute. I was riding my bike as he was walking across the street. I was staring at him so hard, i rode my bicycle into a parked car, and went careening over the hood. I landed face first into the grass. He came over to see if I was okay, and I smiled at him. He made a disgusted face and ran away. I, apparently, had grass and soil all up in my grill, when I tried to flash him my pearly whites. Lol. There have been several more recent ones, but that is the embarrassing moment that haunts me.

larrygaga · September 2014

I farted in front of like 140 people when I was 13, including FI who was my new boyfriend at the time. I played it off like I meant to do it on purpose. I'm over it now but for a long time I just wanted to die.

lurkergirl · September 2014

From time to time I have uncontrollable laughing fits. And they never happen at appropriate times--it's always a quiet classroom or meeting.

Most recently, we were registering at Macy's. We're sitting in the registry area with an employee who is setting it all up for us. Another woman walks up to the other desk, and I hear her say that her wedding is over and she wants to get leftover stuff from the registry. Not interesting, but I decided to eavesdrop the shit out of her conversation, so much so that I totally zoned out.

I hear "Baby!" and respond, "HUH?" in the dumbest hick voice you've ever heard. FI was like, "OMG My future wife...I said your name three times and it was like you just weren't even here. And then you said, 'HUH'. WTH?"

I though that was HILarious and laughed accordingly. And laughed. And laughed. Then tried to stop so we could get serious, but...nope still laughing. And trying to stifle it which just makes it all worse. I had tears pouring down my face, body shaking from laughing so hard.

The guy working with us laughed at me too and said we were definitely one of the most memorable couples.

So, now any time I give FI a hard time about anything, he just says, "HUH?!"

larrygaga · September 2014

lurkergirl said:

From time to time I have uncontrollable laughing fits. And they never happen at appropriate times--it's always a quiet classroom or meeting.

Most recently, we were registering at Macy's. We're sitting in the registry area with an employee who is setting it all up for us. Another woman walks up to the other desk, and I hear her say that her wedding is over and she wants to get leftover stuff from the registry. Not interesting, but I decided to eavesdrop the shit out of her conversation, so much so that I totally zoned out.

I hear "Baby!" and respond, "HUH?" in the dumbest hick voice you've ever heard. FI was like, "OMG My future wife...I said your name three times and it was like you just weren't even here. And then you said, 'HUH'. WTH?"

I though that was HILarious and laughed accordingly. And laughed. And laughed. Then tried to stop so we could get serious, but...nope still laughing. And trying to stifle it which just makes it all worse. I had tears pouring down my face, body shaking from laughing so hard.

The guy working with us laughed at me too and said we were definitely one of the most memorable couples.

So, now any time I give FI a hard time about anything, he just says, "HUH?!"

You have to have something more embarassing than that to tell us.

lurkergirl · September 2014

@larrygaga I obviously suck at storytelling because I swear it was embarrassing! (Picture a nicely dressed lady at an upscale mall laughing like a stoner from Half-Baked. Does that help?

Let's see...what about when we played speed volleyball in high school personal fitness. I tripped over my shoelaces, fell flat on my face, and slid on my belly under the net. My coach couldn't even help me because he was laughing so hard.

ETA: On a deeper, less funny level, I am embarrassed that I took longer to get my shit together than my friends. I was a hot mess in my early twenties!

climbingsingle · September 2014

The most recent thing - my phone rang in the middle of a funeral.

lurkergirl · September 2014

ClimbingBrideNY said:

The most recent thing - my phone rang in the middle of a funeral.

wandajune6 · September 2014

FI is Mexican. He's the oldest of 4 and their dad passed years ago. His brothers married Puerto Rican sisters. The two families are now pretty intertwined, particularly since both families are small-ish in our area.

I studied Spanish for a decade in school but didn't use it for the 12 years before meeting FI. Back then, schools focused more on Spain than Mexico or PR. They also don't teach slang. I suck at if but speak a lot anyway since his mom's English is worse than my Spanish. Also FBILs' PIL don't speak English. I try.

I make people laugh regularly. I've also offended people regularly. I have now called his mom a whore, offered inappropriate 'favors' to the FIL, and insulted the MIL's cooking. And I make them all laugh so hard that I have no idea where I screw up. Fortunately, I'm always forgiven but I wonder when that will get stale.

cupcait927 · September 2014

I am constantly embarrassing myself but one of the best times was when myself and an ex got caught having sex in a car...by a police officer.

We drove down to this little overlook spot that we'd been too before(at night) and had our seksay time. We noticed that a car had driven by a couple of times but really didn't think too much of it. So we get dressed and pull out of the overlook to go home. Well, not 30 seconds after we start driving, flashing lights pop up behind us. Ex pulls over, officer comes to the car door. Officer asks if we knew why he pulled us over, and is trying to be as serious as possible about this but knows we were just teenage kids sneaking sex so he cracks a few jokes with us. Lets us go with just a warning that this might not be the best spot to come back to, since police cars regularly patrol it and then leaves us with a story about the time he was doing concert security and found a 50-something couple getting it on in the back of an SUV in the parking lot at the concert. So embarrassing but it's a funny story in retrospect.

jenna8984 · September 2014

**DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY TK GIVES EVERYONE PARAGRAPHS EXCEPT FOR ME EVEN WHEN I EDIT** In junior high/ early stages of high school I didn't have the period thing down yet and bled through my pants on about 5 occasions (some in school, some outside of school). Once left a spot on my besties fabric sofa. I was so embarassed, I quickly put a pillow over it and went home without saying anything. Obviously her and her family must have known it was me when they later found it but I was thankful that they never said anything. Had a party at my apartment in college one time and my brother and a few of his friends came from home (2 hours away). Everyone was drinking, having a great time. My brother walked in (my bedroom) on me topless, giving a BJ to a guy I was seeing. The light was off so he only saw what shined in from the hallwall thank God. We never mentioned it or joked about it, just pretended it didn't happen.

lurkergirl · September 2014

Omg, @larrygaga I though of one!

High school BF was going down, I got into it, and totally farted in his face. Horrifying. I think I have purposely tried to forget that one, haha.

@jenna8984 Oh my gosh, I would die if my brother saw me doing that! How awful for you (and him too probably lol)

cupcait927 · September 2014

@jenna8984 oh thank god I'm so glad I'm not the only person that the period thing has happened to. First time it happened was on a school trip to Quebec and I totally got called out for it by one of the popular girls (I was decidedly not popular). I wanted to die. And I couldn't change my clothes either because we were leaving to go home that evening so all of our suitcases were on the bus. Had to walk around the rest of the day with a sweatshirt tied around my waist.

southernbelle0915 · September 2014

When I was little, I got injured on a playground and in the time it took to get to the office nurse, then have my mom take me to the hospital, then wait to see the doctor, then this, then that....... We're talking like 4 hours and I already had to pee before I was even on the playground. I REALLY had to pee. And I was a scared little kid so I just didn't ask.

Finally I told the nurse I couldn't hold it any more. She and my mom helped me to the bathroom. I sat down and the pee shot straight out. Like not in the toilet. STRAIGHT OUT. I was spraying the nurse, my mom and the wall. I was sobbing because I was embarrassed but I couldn't stop peeing. So I was sobbing and apologizing and spraying pee everywhere.

Yea. That.

lurkergirl · September 2014

southernbelle0915 said:

When I was little, I got injured on a playground and in the time it took to get to the office nurse, then have my mom take me to the hospital, then wait to see the doctor, then this, then that....... We're talking like 4 hours and I already had to pee before I was even on the playground. I REALLY had to pee. And I was a scared little kid so I just didn't ask.

Finally I told the nurse I couldn't hold it any more. She and my mom helped me to the bathroom. I sat down and the pee shot straight out. Like not in the toilet. STRAIGHT OUT. I was spraying the nurse, my mom and the wall. I was sobbing because I was embarrassed but I couldn't stop peeing. So I was sobbing and apologizing and spraying pee everywhere.

Yea. That.

Oh my gosh, I totally forgot that I peed myself during snowpocalypse. I attempted to rig something up, but it failed, and there was pee everywhere. And I was stuck in the car for HOURS!

FI is the only person who knows about that IRL, and he loves to tease me about it.

southernbelle0915 · September 2014

lurkergirl said:
Oh my gosh, I totally forgot that I peed myself during snowpocalypse. I attempted to rig something up, but it failed, and there was pee everywhere. And I was stuck in the car for HOURS!

FI is the only person who knows about that IRL, and he loves to tease me about it.

Omg... I imagine most cars had at least some pee and poop in them during the snowpocalypse. Unless someone is McGyver or can hold it forever, there's no way around it! I bet the car detailing places had a lot of employee turn around in the following weeks.

Sugargirl1019 · September 2014

Telling all about what secksay time things I've done with DH.

And now Lolo won't look me in the eye.

jenna8984 · September 2014

lurkergirl said:

southernbelle0915 said:

When I was little, I got injured on a playground and in the time it took to get to the office nurse, then have my mom take me to the hospital, then wait to see the doctor, then this, then that....... We're talking like 4 hours and I already had to pee before I was even on the playground. I REALLY had to pee. And I was a scared little kid so I just didn't ask.

Finally I told the nurse I couldn't hold it any more. She and my mom helped me to the bathroom. I sat down and the pee shot straight out. Like not in the toilet. STRAIGHT OUT. I was spraying the nurse, my mom and the wall. I was sobbing because I was embarrassed but I couldn't stop peeing. So I was sobbing and apologizing and spraying pee everywhere.

Yea. That.

Oh my gosh, I totally forgot that I peed myself during snowpocalypse. I attempted to rig something up, but it failed, and there was pee everywhere. And I was stuck in the car for HOURS!

FI is the only person who knows about that IRL, and he loves to tease me about it.

OMG I forgot I sharted once. But I don't consider it embarassing because no one ever knew!!!!!!

I was in a nice restaurant with ex, halfway through my meal and felt my stomach rumbling. I tried to let out a little silent fart to relieve it and I instantly felt the area get wet/warm. I was like WTF just happened?! Went to the restroom and there was a slight bit of diarrea but I happened to be wearing a pad for the end of my cycle so THANK GOD I just threw the pad out and it was fine! I did not tell him! If I had only been wearing underwear it would have been a disaster!!
@southernbelle0915 yours totally made me LOL

lurkergirl · September 2014

OMG, one of my friends sharted once. It was AWFUL! I wasn't there, so I'm retelling what she told me, but...

She had been out for a big dinner and a night of heavy drinking. They were leaving to walk to another bar, and her tummy felt a little rumbly. She let out a little fart--or so she thought--then felt something warm and wet running down her leg!!!!!

She got into the bar, cleaned herself up, and threw her underwear in the trash and kept partying!! Sooooo gross. And she is so not a normally gross person at all, so it was extra funny to hear her tell that story.

Ndelible · September 2014

Speaking of periods... When I finally met FH's parents, we went to their house straight from the airport. Aunt Flow was on her way out, so I didn't think to check my pad. Needless to say, I spotted all over there couch. I realized it was happening and sheepishly told her. I thought that's it, they are going to think I'm a grown woman who can't manage her lady functions. She laughed and told me not to worry. I went to the bathroom to clean myself up. When I came back, she had gotten the stain up (fabric, not leather). Looked like nothing happened. And she loves me. Crisis avoided.

lurkergirl · September 2014

Ndelible said:

Speaking of periods... When I finally met FH's parents, we went to their house straight from the airport. Aunt Flow was on her way out, so I didn't think to check my pad. Needless to say, I spotted all over there couch. I realized it was happening and sheepishly told her. I thought that's it, they are going to think I'm a grown woman who can't manage her lady functions. She laughed and told me not to worry. I went to the bathroom to clean myself up. When I came back, she had gotten the stain up (fabric, not leather). Looked like nothing happened. And she loves me. Crisis avoided.

Aww, that's actually sweet

We were at the FIL's a few months ago, and we were staying in their garage apartment. They don't normally have guests up there, and there were a few dead bugs in the living room, so I picked them up with giant wads of t.p. and flushed them.

Later, FI went to use the restroom, and the toilet overflowed like crazy. They are on septic, and the whole thing just backed up and flooded the bathroom.

I never told anyone it was actually my fault because you should definitely not flush half a roll of tp at once when you're on septic. Whoops.

climbingsingle · September 2014

I never understood how sharting happened. Until it happened to me. There should have been an after-school special about this. Thankfully it happened to me at home, and no one ever knew about it. Until know. And all of you know.

steph861 · September 2014

I don't remember the (supposedly) most embarrassing thing I've ever done. When I was, like, six, apparently I was running around at some function and ran straight into the mayor's crotch. I'm told he doubled over in pain. I guess you could say that was more embarrassing for my parents than it was for me. As for the most embarrassing thing that I can actually remember, that would be freezing up for 30 seconds during a big piano recital. ETA: TK, why you no give me paragraphs?

afox007 · September 2014

I embarrass myself on a regular basis so not 100% what the most embarrassing thing ever was, but the most recent was at FI's show on Sunday. I had been sitting super close to the stage with the other SO's and got up to get a drink. There was this weird little ramp up to the bar that had an inch gap at the bottom, my heel caught and I managed to fall in front of a few hundred people. Luckily I did not spill my beer.

SBmini · September 2014

I peed my pants at summer camp. There were two comedians performing for us. I had to pee really bad, but I didn't want to leave because they were so hilarious, hence the outcome. I don't know how many people realized, but I'm sure some did. I hung out leaning up against a door until everyone else left and then slipped into my cabin to change.

I was probably 11 at the time.

jynxiie · September 2014

I'm REALLY, REALLY good at forgetting anything I don't want to remember.

I know I have embarrassed myself a lot, but thankfully can only rememeber the really recent stuff.

This was when I first met FI - He invited me over to his buddies house.
We were all drinking hard and fast - which is fun but I hadn't eaten all day... So it hit me like a ton of bricks.

I am usually really good at handling my booze... But not that day...

I blacked out... Went to their washroom to throw up like crazy...
Passed out while doing so ... Somehow breaking the toliet seat with my face (classy).

I stand up... Fall right back down - this time face planting.

FI bangs on the door - he's freaking. Finally he gets the door open... Blood was everywhere.

All over my face...

His friends are all freaking - one thinks I am underage (over the age limit by 3 years, but thanks). So they're looking through my wallet to see my ID.

Luckily one of the guys girlfriends went to school for medical assistant - so she cleaned me up.

I was fine - but I gave them money for a new toliet seat.

southernbelle0915 · September 2014

Oh, and there's also the time that I was tailgating for a football game. It was a white out (everyone wears white), so I was all cute in my white outfit. We were walking by this mud pit where a bunch of SUPER wasted college kids were mud wrestling. It was NASTY. Before I knew what was happening, the guy comes up, grabs me and throws me in. Obviously an asshole and everyone was hated him.

So I'm covered in mud and have to walk 2 miles back to my car that was parked in a neighborhood and where I THANKFULLY had a change of clothes. On the way, people felt bad for me so they were offering me shots, which I accepted. By the time I got back to my car I was wasted. I was basically changing my clothes in the street because I didn't want to get mud in my car. Some old couple comes out of their house and offers for me to come inside. They thought I was homeless and living out of my car. That I had gotten drunk and fallen in a ditch. They gave me food because they thought I was hungry and asked if I had access to clean water - if I didn't I could shower there. Then they drove me back to the stadium.

Yea. That, too.

Sugargirl1019 · September 2014

southernbelle0915 said:
Oh, and there's also the time that I was tailgating for a football game. It was a white out (everyone wears white), so I was all cute in my white outfit. We were walking by this mud pit where a bunch of SUPER wasted college kids were mud wrestling. It was NASTY. Before I knew what was happening, the guy comes up, grabs me and throws me in. Obviously an asshole and everyone was hated him.

So I'm covered in mud and have to walk 2 miles back to my car that was parked in a neighborhood and where I THANKFULLY had a change of clothes. On the way, people felt bad for me so they were offering me shots, which I accepted. By the time I got back to my car I was wasted. I was basically changing my clothes in the street because I didn't want to get mud in my car. Some old couple comes out of their house and offers for me to come inside. They thought I was homeless and living out of my car. That I had gotten drunk and fallen in a ditch. They gave me food because they thought I was hungry and asked if I had access to clean water - if I didn't I could shower there. Then they drove me back to the stadium.

Yea. That, too.

OH MY GOSH! That's a great story. I'm sorry that happened to you!

lurkergirl · September 2014

southernbelle0915 said:

Oh, and there's also the time that I was tailgating for a football game. It was a white out (everyone wears white), so I was all cute in my white outfit. We were walking by this mud pit where a bunch of SUPER wasted college kids were mud wrestling. It was NASTY. Before I knew what was happening, the guy comes up, grabs me and throws me in. Obviously an asshole and everyone was hated him.

So I'm covered in mud and have to walk 2 miles back to my car that was parked in a neighborhood and where I THANKFULLY had a change of clothes. On the way, people felt bad for me so they were offering me shots, which I accepted. By the time I got back to my car I was wasted. I was basically changing my clothes in the street because I didn't want to get mud in my car. Some old couple comes out of their house and offers for me to come inside. They thought I was homeless and living out of my car. That I had gotten drunk and fallen in a ditch. They gave me food because they thought I was hungry and asked if I had access to clean water - if I didn't I could shower there. Then they drove me back to the stadium.

Yea. That, too.

Bahaha. I picture you being a super classy lady, so the image of that happening to you really cracks me up

southernbelle0915 · September 2014

lurkergirl said:
Bahaha. I picture you being a super classy lady, so the image of that happening to you really cracks me up

LOL thanks! I felt like a wet dog. When they started alluding to me being homeless, I started to correct them and they were like "no, no... it's ok." So I just didn't say anything except thanks. They were really sweet, but DAMN I was embarrassed.

SBmini · September 2014

southernbelle0915 said:

Oh, and there's also the time that I was tailgating for a football game. It was a white out (everyone wears white), so I was all cute in my white outfit. We were walking by this mud pit where a bunch of SUPER wasted college kids were mud wrestling. It was NASTY. Before I knew what was happening, the guy comes up, grabs me and throws me in. Obviously an asshole and everyone was hated him.

So I'm covered in mud and have to walk 2 miles back to my car that was parked in a neighborhood and where I THANKFULLY had a change of clothes. On the way, people felt bad for me so they were offering me shots, which I accepted. By the time I got back to my car I was wasted. I was basically changing my clothes in the street because I didn't want to get mud in my car. Some old couple comes out of their house and offers for me to come inside. They thought I was homeless and living out of my car. That I had gotten drunk and fallen in a ditch. They gave me food because they thought I was hungry and asked if I had access to clean water - if I didn't I could shower there. Then they drove me back to the stadium.

Yea. That, too.

Awww! What a sweet couple! That's awesome

Senecaf · September 2014

I went out with my girlfriends a few years ago. We had been drinking but not much, however after 1 drink I have to pee like crazy and it continues all night. I was driving on the way to a bar and had to go so bad but there was no where to go so I pulled my dress up and sat on a sweater just in case. It started happening at a red light so I threw the car in park and hopped out and peed in the grass. In the middle of a busy downtown bar area. So bad. Underwear and sweater both peed on. The traffic cop saw me and ignored me. He had to have know. They still tease me about it.

Most embarrassing thing you have done?

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