Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Mother/Father Dance

Hello Ladies! I decided to post after going back and forth for a while on the Mother/Father Dance situtation me and FH have. Both my father and his mother passed some time ago, thus creating my current dilemma. I had three options in mind 1.) no dance at all for either of us, 2.) we dance at the same time with our uncles/aunts and 3.) I dance with his father and he dance with my mother at the same time to the same song. I have already nixed number #2 as there are too many aunts and uncles and too much coordination would be needed to have them each dance a little part. So that leaves me with option #1 and #3. I would really like to do #3 as a symbolic gesture to our new mom/dad (we all get along very well) but without taking away the significance of our actual parents. But my thought is unless I can find the right song then we would just scrap the whole mother/father dance thing all together. So, my ultimate question to you is, do you know any song fitting of the situation?

Currently, the two songs that were suggested to me and I kinda liked were "There You'll Be" by Faith Hill and "You've Got A Friend" by James Taylor.

Thanks for your time!

Re: Mother/Father Dance

  • My vote would go to #1. Just do the first dance with you and your FI. 

    I honestly think #3 would look a little like you're trying to replace/fill space. Obviously no one can take the place of your father/his mother, so I would tread carefully on making it look like you're trying to do so. 
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  • I agree with southernbelle, I would go with option #1.  You can dance with his father at another point during the reception, and it will still be very meaningful.
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  • I vote for option 1 as well.  In addition to what the PPs have said, your guests will appreciate it if you limit spotlight dances and other activities where they can't actively participate in the festivities.
  • Option 1. Definitely not option 2.
  • I also agree with option 1.  If something happened to my dad, and my sister chose to dance with her FIL instead, I'd be a bit miffed that he is taking that place. 
  • We're doing something similar in that FH's parents are both gone so I am dancing with my father at the same time he is dancing with my mother. Choosing a song was a challenge and we came up with "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong and both of my parents thought it was a great choice. An added bonus is it's pretty short.
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