Death with Dignity Act

paperpusher · October 2014

This came across my Yahoo news feed this evening:
https://www.yahoo.com/health/one-womans-quest-to-die-with-dignity-and-what-it-means-99374572007.html

For those of you who don't want to click thru - it's an article highlighting the Death with Dignity Act established in Oregon.
Where a competent adult with a terminal illness that is a resident of Oregon can request help in ending their life on their own terms (through what sounds like prescribed medications).

I'm on the fence about this.
Someone who is ill, has no hope of recovery or a normal life, and wants to go on their own terms.
When FIL started showing signs of ALS and everything was progressing so fast he was essentially trapped in his own body. Couldn't talk, couldn't walk, needed help every where he went. He was a proud man and it was really sad seeing him so dependent on others.

But on the other hand I'm glad we had every moment we did with him and his time wasn't cut more short than it already was. It's still very upsetting thinking about him and how much he won't be here for.

I guess I'm on the side with being OK that that option is there, but not 100%. But please don't make it your first option. Explore other things first.

What's your opinion?

ETF: Clarity and grammar

theartistformerlyknownas · October 2014

Also on the fence. I can understand leaving a person free to make that choice, but...ugh that story made me miserably sad.

LabLove86 · October 2014

I'm all for it. ******** But I also think there should be very strict stipulations. Such as - must have a medically terminal disease, must be of sound mind, and give consent multiple times with X days/weeks between hand. *********** I think it could be easily abused if not extremely closely monitored - but at the same time I would want this option for myself if I was in a terminal situation that would result in pain and suffering. ETA - PARAGRAPHS

Nymeru · October 2014

I can't imagine trying to tell someone who truly wants it that they shouldn't. It's painful for those being left behind, but I think we should respect what people want to do with their own bodies/lives.

holyguacamole79 · October 2014

Also on the fence. I remember watching my uncle in the final weeks of his life and praying that God would take him and end his pain. On the other hand, I have issues with suicide.

lurkergirl · October 2014

This is seriously tough stuff. Just like lolo, it makes me miserably sad.

I am not exactly sure how feel about it. The idea of choosing a date I think makes me a little uncomfortable. I'm not sure exactly why, but...it just does.

I'm also curious if she will donate her body to science. Wouldn't it be nice to study this awful cancer and make potential strides in treatment so that future sufferers maybe don't need to make that decision, or the diagnosis won't be a death sentence (regardless of whether that death is by choice/on your own terms or through nature)?

jynxiie · October 2014

There is a great documentary called 'How to die in Oregon'

It follows some families that are looking into the option and even some that take the medication.
The ones that they followed also had counselors who would ask you before you did take the medication to explain what the medication would do to you if you did take it. As well as I believe it asked you why you wanted to take it.

I believe people should be able to choose if they suffer or not.

larrygaga · October 2014

As a hospice therapist and social worker, I believe people have the right to die in the way that they choose, in the most humane way possible. It is very rare for me to work with people who are competent upon death (work in a dementia and MR ward), in which a power of attorney must choose if they can have life sustaining procedures or not. It is also rare for me to work with people who are so young.

It seems like she didn't want that to be her first option. It's awesome that she is allowed to choose.

I have seen some very horrifying things happen to people who are dying, because they or their loved one did not want them to die.

Here is a story on my perspective. I have seen a very frail old person have all her ribs break and many other bones when the EMTs were trying to give her CPR. It really was her time to go, she didn't survive and she had to go through agonizing pain on her way out. Or her heart could have stopped and she could have gently (relative) died. I used to believe in saving peoples lives no matter what, until I heard every single crunch of her ribs.

Another time this man had all these feeding tubes and other wires hooked up to him and they were all getting infected and he was on so many pain pills that he had no idea what was happening. All to keep him alive for a few more weeks. This actually happens often. Don't even get me started on dialysis.

All of these life sustaining procedures are wonderful and can be worth it depending on a person's quality of life. Why should we torture people to keep them alive for a few more drug induced weeks?

It gets tricky IMO when the person is so young, but all my experience is with people who are 85 and up, and have lived their lives. Personally, I don't think I would be brave enough to end my own life like she will be doing. Even if it meant horrific brain cancer death.

larrygaga · October 2014

jynxiie said:

There is a great documentary called 'How to die in Oregon'

It follows some families that are looking into the option and even some that take the medication.
The ones that they followed also had counselors who would ask you before you did take the medication to explain what the medication would do to you if you did take it. As well as I believe it asked you why you wanted to take it.

I believe people should be able to choose if they suffer or not.

I had the pleasure of working with a man who was fed up with dialysis, and I had to have him explain to me over and over what happens if he stops going. In my facility, a whole lot of people have to test him over and over to be sure that is what they want. There's a whole procedure.

Jells2dot0 · October 2014

I have recently been in a great deal of pain. It fucked with me so much mentally. It's fucking with me right now as I'm having a great deal of bone pain from my Neulasta injection. However, I knew it would end and I knew I would survive. My pain was probably a fraction of what terminally ill patients go through and my pain would come and go. It wasn't constant and persistent. After my personal experience, I would want the choice to end my pain. Oddly enough, my family backs this 100% regardless of how they feel about losing me. Sad to say, we had the discussion when we weren't sure what my prognosis would be.

lyndausvi · October 2014

My grandmother was put on a ventilator against her will. She had a DNR that was not honored.

Once on you can't be taken off (she was not in a coma or brain dead).

It took her 10 months to gain enough strength to get off the ventilator. She died 7 days later.

I spent 10 months listening to her BEG me to get her off the ventilator. 10 long months. All she wanted to do was die. I had a sense of relieve when she died. She was finally where she wanted to be.

As long as they are of sound mind, have a terminal illness or have DNR orders I'm all good with it. My grandma didn't want to prolong the inevitable. Both my parents feel the same way and have made their wishes known (I'm their medical POA of the other parents is unable).

I have also made my wishes known. I want the ability to make the choice if I was truly terminally ill. Especially the older I get. If I make it to 70 something I will have lived a good life, no need to extended it a few months in pain.

lurkergirl · October 2014

lyndausvi said:

My grandmother was put on a ventilator against her will. She had a DNR that was not honored.
Once on you can't be taken off (she was not in a coma or brain dead).

It took her 10 months to gain enough strength to get off the ventilator. She died 7 days later.

I spent 10 months listening to her BEG me to get her off the ventilator. 10 long months. All she wanted to do was die. I had a sense of relieve when she died. She was finally where she wanted to be.

As long as they are of sound mind, have a terminal illness or have DNR orders I'm all good with it. My grandma didn't want to prolong the inevitable. Both my parents feel the same way and have made their wishes known (I'm their medical POA of the other parents is unable).

I have also made my wishes known.  I want the ability to make the choice if I was truly terminally ill. Especially the older I get. If I make it to 70 something I will have lived a good life, no need to extended it a few months in pain.

See, 70s seems still kind of young to me. It's common in my family to make it well into your 90s, so maybe I have a weird perspective, but I don't think I would be ready to give up at that age.

JCbride2015 · October 2014

I read a different story on her and it just breaks my heart. She is so brave. I'm not sure I could do that.

I feel the same way about assisted suicide as I feel about abortion, actually. I don't think it should be the first option, but it should be safe (in this case of course I guess I mean as painless and effective as possible) and legal for people who have really considered the decision and evaluated their options. Bodily integrity is a major foundation of our Bill of Rights and a basic human right. I know it's an ethical problem for doctors, but I think it should at least be an option on the table.

Ndelible · October 2014

My Mother died last year after a very long bout with diabetes, heart disease and gout. She had to lose several toes and had a terrible ulcer on her leg. She caught several infections of the blood due to the dialysis. The last one did her in. Her brain swelled and she couldn't breathe. The first night of that hospital stay, I knew it was time for her to go. I asked her and she nodded yes, because she couldn't speak. The doctors wanted to intabate (sp?) her. I was against it and my sister for it. She had a DNR, but she was coherent, so my sister convinced her to try it. That meant two more weeks of terrible pain as the infection spread. She told me she wanted to go when I asked. However, my sister kept pressuring her to stay. It was terribly difficult to finally let her wishes known to the doctors, when she was basically on life support.

I have written my wishes and have a DNR. My sister is not my healthcare guardian. If you have a right to live, I think you have a right to die.

huskypuppy14 · October 2014

I was going to post about this last night, but I didn't want to post and run.

I completely agree with her choices. Her body, her choice.

Do you realize she is going to become a vegetable. She doesn't want to go through that. She's going to suffer until she dies. That doesn't sound like a life to me.

If your pet had inoperable cancer, would you just let it suffer until it died? Of course not. So why make it so difficult for humans?

lyndausvi · October 2014

lurkergirl said:

lyndausvi said:

My grandmother was put on a ventilator against her will. She had a DNR that was not honored.
Once on you can't be taken off (she was not in a coma or brain dead).

It took her 10 months to gain enough strength to get off the ventilator. She died 7 days later.

I spent 10 months listening to her BEG me to get her off the ventilator. 10 long months. All she wanted to do was die. I had a sense of relieve when she died. She was finally where she wanted to be.

As long as they are of sound mind, have a terminal illness or have DNR orders I'm all good with it. My grandma didn't want to prolong the inevitable. Both my parents feel the same way and have made their wishes known (I'm their medical POA of the other parents is unable).

I have also made my wishes known.  I want the ability to make the choice if I was truly terminally ill. Especially the older I get. If I make it to 70 something I will have lived a good life, no need to extended it a few months in pain.

See, 70s seems still kind of young to me. It's common in my family to make it well into your 90s, so maybe I have a weird perspective, but I don't think I would be ready to give up at that age.

All but one grandparents lived well into their 80's. But if they got as sick as they did in their 70s they would have wanted to go. Dad just turned 70. He is still working and running half marathons on the Great Wall of China. He is in prefect health. My mom is almost 69. She has a lot of medical issues. She is in consent pain (not terminally ill). If she became terminally ill in the next 10 years I can see her not wanting to prolong the inevitable.

lurkergirl · October 2014

lyndausvi said:

lurkergirl said:

lyndausvi said:

My grandmother was put on a ventilator against her will. She had a DNR that was not honored.
Once on you can't be taken off (she was not in a coma or brain dead).

It took her 10 months to gain enough strength to get off the ventilator. She died 7 days later.

I spent 10 months listening to her BEG me to get her off the ventilator. 10 long months. All she wanted to do was die. I had a sense of relieve when she died. She was finally where she wanted to be.

As long as they are of sound mind, have a terminal illness or have DNR orders I'm all good with it. My grandma didn't want to prolong the inevitable. Both my parents feel the same way and have made their wishes known (I'm their medical POA of the other parents is unable).

I have also made my wishes known.  I want the ability to make the choice if I was truly terminally ill. Especially the older I get. If I make it to 70 something I will have lived a good life, no need to extended it a few months in pain.

See, 70s seems still kind of young to me. It's common in my family to make it well into your 90s, so maybe I have a weird perspective, but I don't think I would be ready to give up at that age.

All but one grandparents lived well into their 80's. But if they got as sick as they did in their 70s they would have wanted to go. Dad just turned 70. He is still working and running half marathons on the Great Wall of China. He is in prefect health. My mom is almost 69. She has a lot of medical issues. She is in consent pain (not terminally ill). If she became terminally ill in the next 10 years I can see her not wanting to prolong the inevitable.

That makes sense. I guess I view it more on an individual basis than "hey, this age is when I'm done."**

**Full disclosure I heard about THIS yesterday, and I think the two articles together just make me feel...I don't know, a little uneasy, I guess? As much as people want to have the right to die, I also want the right to live. I don't want anyone to ever tell me that it's my time to go because I'm too old or too sick. If I have the money and the willpower, then who is anyone else to stop me from fighting for life?

JCbride2015 · October 2014

@lurkergirl I just read that article yesterday too, didn't quite get to the end of it. It gave me a queasy feeling. Why put a number on it? Shouldn't your desire to live be based on your quality of life instead of some arbitrary age?

NavyBlue143 · October 2014

We have the right to end our pet's life if we feel they are suffering, and they cannot decide for themselves. People have that ability, and yet the law says we do not. I couldn't put my dog through weeks or months of needless suffering, I can't imagine expecting a family member to endure it. It's hard and it sucks, but there's a peace knowing someone went peacefully and while there was still joy in their lives. I personally am terrified of being aware but trapped in a useless body, or losing my mind while my body is sound. I would like for my family to remember me as I am, not a husk of who I was.

bethsmiles · October 2014

I don't think I could ever be so selfish as to tell someone I love that they can't end their pain because I need more time with them. It's heartbreaking to lose someone you love, it's even more heartbreaking to see them suffer for months waiting for it to end. I have no problem with the death with dignity act. I don't know if I would choose that option were I in the position but I think the option should be there.

I don't know if each state has the same stipulations but I know that in Washington you must be competent adult with a terminal illness that will lead to death in 6 months or less. And they have to make multiple requests a specific number of days apart and the doctor has to wait a certain number of days between the last required request and writing the prescription (I can't remember the exact number of days for all of that). No one is making a hasty decision in this process. People aren't just going in and asking for lethal doses of drugs and getting them. These are people who are in a heartbreaking situation and there is no easy answer so I don't see a problem with giving them every available option, even if that option is to end their life.

hellohkb · October 2014

Personally, I am 100% for the Death with Dignity act. I strongly believe that every person has the right to do whatever they want with their own body should they so choose to. The amount of pain that some people go through, I could not imagine telling that person "no, you cannot choose to end your pain".

There's a very moving and touching documentary on Netflix about this called How to Die in Oregon. I highly recommend it to those who are interested.

[Deleted User] · October 2014

[Deleted User] · October 2014

lc07 · October 2014

I'm 100% on board with the right to choose to end your life. I don't know that I'd be brave enough to make that choice for myself. I'd love to believe that I'd be some miracle case that came through the other side and recover even if everyone said it was impossible. Especially if I was in my 20s. But I've never experienced anything remotely close to the pain and suffering that these people are dealing with, so who knows how I would react in that situation. I would want the option, though, and I'd want my loved ones to have the option as well.

raissyrais · October 2014

It's a sad business but I'm all for it too.

Maggie0829 · October 2014

I am all for people having the right to decide how and when they want to die. Myself and others around should not be selfish and "force" them to stay just so that we can have one more day with them. It is their life and it should be their choice when to go.

I also believe ending your life because you are in pain and suffering from a terminally ill disease is completely different then someone committing suicide because of emotional and mental issues, that if they sought help then they could be "cured," so to speak (unfortunately as a nation we still think of this type of disease as something that is shameful and not be talked about). I don't see the terminally ill patient as committing suicide but rather not prolonging the inevitable. I think this distinction is very important and is probably why people are against it because all they think about is "suicide" rather then the context of the situation.

l9i · October 2014

I did not even know this was an option in some states until yesterday when I saw that article. I am 100% for this and I know my DH is agrees as well because we've talked about this very thing. I recently watched my grandmother go threw a long, painful, drawn out death over a two month period. She essentially stopped eating and drinking because she wanted so bad just to pass and be free. Once she began this she was inserted with feeding tubes and laid in bed contracting even more pain with growing bed sores over the next few weeks until her passing. While it was sad to see her go it was FAR worse to see her like that, knowing how bad she wanted to be done with the pain, yet she was not able to - it was heartbreaking.

Once my time on the Earth has passed and I was terminal with clearly no signs of recovery I would want the same option. I would want to have my family with me and go in peace knowing they were by my side. In terms of family members being against it. It's sad but I would not be selfish enough to stop someone just to have "a little more time" be that days, weeks, or months. Death is inevitable and cannot be avoided given time.

hellosweetie1015 · October 2014

I would want this option, even if I never used it. I'm home today (up all night with the same sort of sick I had a few weeks ago. Not a fan.) so I'll look up that How to Die in Oregon documentary.

I'm with @pinkrevenge - if FI was terminally ill and told me he wanted this option, it would break my heart but I'd move heaven, hell, and everything in between to ensure he was able to use it.

ETA Formerly CaitTDid23. Remembered on mobile, forgot it wasn't part of my sig. Dumbutt.

Bubblegum5586 · October 2014

JCbride2015 said:

I read a different story on her and it just breaks my heart. She is so brave. I'm not sure I could do that.

I feel the same way about assisted suicide as I feel about abortion, actually. I don't think it should be the first option, but it should be safe (in this case of course I guess I mean as painless and effective as possible) and legal for people who have really considered the decision and evaluated their options. Bodily integrity is a major foundation of our Bill of Rights and a basic human right. I know it's an ethical problem for doctors, but I think it should at least be an option on the table.

This was my thought on it. It is not my place to tell others what to do with THEIR body.

I read the article yesterday and watched the video of the girl and it most definitely brought me to tears. I though it was interesting when she said it is NOT assisted suicide. She doesn't want to die.

I hadn't realized it was legal in some states and I think that it great. I remember as a kid when Dr. Kevorkian went to jail and my dad was explainging it to me. I couldn't comprehend why what this man was doing was so wrong. If someone is in unimaginable pain why can't you help them?

pinkcow13 · October 2014

I read about this yesterday and it brought tears to my eyes. I cannot even begin to imagine what she and her family must be going through.

Like most PP's, I am all for this, for the reasons listed above. I think she is very courageous. I know that if I was told that there was no chance for me to be cured of my disease, and that I would end up dying a painful death, I would do this. I think it is much worse for the family to see a loved one suffer from a debilitating disease than to have them die in a dignified matter. At least this is my personal take on this from watching loved ones suffer, and from seeing my moms pain when HER mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

flyingfoxes · October 2014

I saw this story yesterday and it was just so sad. I completely 100% agree with her right to die with dignity. Why in the world would you want someone you love to suffer and waste away in horrible pain - that's not extending your time with him/her - that's torture.

I don't believe it's suicide. She's choosing to avoid pain and suffering, but she's going to die, regardless.

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