When you just wanna smack him...

novella1186 · October 2014

As wonderful as my FI is, and as much great stuff I could say about him, sometimes he just makes me mad/annoyed. I'll call it mannoyed. (works on two levels cuz the man is annoying me and he's making me a combo of mad and annoyed). Ha.

What really drives me nuts is when I ask the most simple straight forward question and he replies with "what do you mean?"

Example: last night I asked, "Hey, where's the scrub brush?" because I was trying to clean the bathroom.

He replies "What do you mean?"

I stare at him blankly for a few seconds and then say, "What do you mean what do I mean? What part of that question do you need me to clarify?"

Seriously, how do I explain that or make it clearer for him? Just where is the effing scrub brush, dude.

Then he said, "Oh, it's in the laundry room."

Doesn't help that I was already crabby and that I don't really enjoy scrubbing the bathroom.

What are your pet peeves with FI/ DH?

larrygaga · October 2014

He's a know it all.

The annoying part is that he is always right.

birdybride2014 · October 2014

FI doesn't really have anything that he does that constantly bothers me. Except for when he is watching sports. If a team he loves does one bad thing or has a single bad play, then he immediately throws a hissy fit and screams, or does something overly dramatic. I hate it, and he knows I hate it.

It all stems from me not being a huge sports fan/not liking people yelling and being overtly angry because I naturally get frightened or startled, but he's working on it lol and I try to care less that he's being a big, loud baby lol

Jells2dot0 · October 2014

Mine is answering a question with another question and throwing the ball back into my court.

Examples:

Me: I am not craving anything for dinner. What would you like to have?

DH: I don't know, what do you want to have?

Me: What did you want to do today? I don't have anything particular in mind.

DH: I don't know, what did you want to do today?

I can make the decision myself, but I know if I do, then I'll be accused of always making all of the decisions.

holyguacamole79 · October 2014

My husband can take FOREVER to tell a story. Sometimes I'm like "hey, babe, wrap it up!"

Couggal12 · October 2014

That would annoy me too.

H talks to himself when he is on the computer or typing an e-mail. It doesn't drive me crazy usually but, then sometimes he will ask me a question and I'll tune it out because I think he's talking to himself. Then he gets annoyed when I don't reply. Like how am I supposed to know?! Or vice versa, I'll reply when he is talking to himself and he's like "Huh? I was talking to myself".

novella1186 · October 2014

Jells2dot0 said:

Mine is answering a question with another question and throwing the ball back into my court.

Examples:

Me: I am not craving anything for dinner. What would you like to have?
DH: I don't know, what do you want to have?

Me: What did you want to do today? I don't have anything particular in mind.
DH: I don't know, what did you want to do today?

I can make the decision myself, but I know if I do, then I'll be accused of always making all of the decisions.

Yep, that happened to me a couple years back. FI is really easy-going and will never decide on anything, so I would decide to just get down to business and say "Fine, let's do this" knowing that otherwise we'd just sit there for hours trying to decide. Then he decided that I was being "controlling" and not letting him pick anything. After a really annoying, stupid, long argument, he admitted that he really never does pick anything, even if I try to get him to, so I really wasn't being controlling, I was just being impatient. He's better at picking things these days.

blabla89 · October 2014

FI sometimes corrects my pronunciation of words, which doesn't necessarily bother me, except usually when he does it he's the one pronouncing it wrong. And he refuses to believe me when I tell him so. It irks me so much.

Yesterday I told him I was planning to make chili with all the accoutrements, to which he replied, "Uh...do you mean account-trements? I'm pretty sure you mean account-trements." (and he was totally serious)

goldchocobo.defunct635829490514903826 · October 2014

Answering a question with a question is damn annoying.

I work all day. FI will call me (from home or work, he works shift work in retail) and will say "So what are you thinking for dinner? Like, any ideas?" (Not to imply it's up to me for dinner, but he wants to agree on a dinner option)

When I tell him he gets to make dinner, I get calls like "So, do you cook chicken at 350F or 400F? When I should I put the potatoes on?" He's a hesitant cook because he doesn't want to screw it up, but he gets in his own head sometimes....

cupcait927 · October 2014

Some days living with H is like playing a never-ending game of 20 questions. He's got anxiety and most of the time has it under control, but the question thing is a symptom of it. He can get so nervous to make a decision that he ends up asking me a million questions, basically putting all of the decisions on me. I snapped at him the other day because it was only like 9 am and I think I had answered 10 different questions from him, because he couldn't just be decisive. Also, when we had to write thank you notes. I seriously didn't know it was that hard to write a basic thank you note until I had H help me after the wedding. He kept asking question after question like he was writing a dissertation, not just a simple note to his OWN FAMILY to say thank you. I think it's more frustrating to me than most because I will try my hardest to find the answer on my own, before asking questions, and H is the opposite.

hellosweetie1015 · October 2014

FI very very rarely picks anything. I usually spend about thirty minutes going back and forth with him because for real it feels like everything we do, I picked. I get more frustrated with having to pick all the time than I do just about anything else.

Although he also is a fan of looking like he's gonna kiss me and then licking my forehead/cheek/nose/whatever instead. That's a little annoying.

I loved your post for the "mannoyed" bit.

gladyscf · October 2014

larrygaga said:

He's a know it all.

The annoying part is that he is always right.

Same with my FI. I hate having to tell him he was right.

Also, if I remember a detail differently than he does, we will go back and forth for a few times and then I'll say, "whatever, is this something we need to argue about?" That usually ends it but I can tell it's not satisfying to him cause I've not conceded to his being right and he hasn't proven it. I just shake my head.

amelisha · October 2014

The two things that make me irrationally upset with my fiance are both housekeeping related.

First, he can't brush his teeth without getting spots ALL OVER the mirror and the taps. I have no idea how or why, but I can clean them every single day and it never looks like I've done a thing. Fortunately it's not a bathroom guests use, but I still get rage-y about it sometimes.

The second thing is that he has allergies pretty much year round, and consequently blows his nose a lot. Not a problem, except he only manages to get about 80% of them into the garbage. The rest end up wadded up on end tables, on the floor on his side of the bed, and (worst) in the pockets of his sweaters, which then go in the wash and disintegrate into little white clean-laundry-coating balls of lint. I no longer wash our clothes in the same load, but still. And I know he tries - before we lived together I think 80% of the tissue DIDN'T make it into the garbage, but accidentally touching a wet, mucus-y tissue is one of the most disgusting feelings in the entire world and it makes me a little violent, haha.

LadyMillil · October 2014

DH has this friend that thinks it is awesome to be a troll IRL. DH has been spending too much time with the friend recently and has adopted his habit so he trolls me all the time. It drives me bananas and I said I'd stop talking to him if he can't have a normal conversation with me. I was telling him how a thesis defense works and we had the following conversation

Me - you have to be quiet. you can't ask any questions

Him - I can't even say how much I like cats.

Me - no, you can't say anything.

Him - But it's really important that the examiners know how much I like cats

Me - If you do that you will be asked to leave. The door is locked so you won't be able to get back in

Him - The door being locked doesn't seem safe. What if there is a zombie apocalypse?

decembergrl2014 · October 2014

FI's biggest thing is saying, "I will." It doesn't matter if I ask him to do something big or small, that's his answer. Sometimes I'll just take care of it myself (like putting his clothes upstairs so they're not all over the place) and other times I have to ask him multiple times, like deciding on tuxes for the wedding, and FINALLY deciding on a BM. He gets it done, but not before him calling me a nag. My response: "just get it done, and you won't have to be nagged".

novella1186 · October 2014

decembergrl2014 said:

FI's biggest thing is saying, "I will." It doesn't matter if I ask him to do something big or small, that's his answer. Sometimes I'll just take care of it myself (like putting his clothes upstairs so they're not all over the place) and other times I have to ask him multiple times, like deciding on tuxes for the wedding, and FINALLY deciding on a BM. He gets it done, but not before him calling me a nag. My response: "just get it done, and you won't have to be nagged".

SIB
My FI is the same way. He definitely put the "pro" in procrastination.

lovesclimbing · October 2014

Jells2dot0 said:

Mine is answering a question with another question and throwing the ball back into my court.

Examples:

Me: I am not craving anything for dinner. What would you like to have?
DH: I don't know, what do you want to have?

Me: What did you want to do today? I don't have anything particular in mind.
DH: I don't know, what did you want to do today?

I can make the decision myself, but I know if I do, then I'll be accused of always making all of the decisions.

With us, I'll say what I want to do, he'll say he doesn't feel like it, and then he'll suggest x and I'll say OK. So next time, he'll say "well, where do you want to eat?" and I'll say "Oh, I don't care, what do you want?" and he'll say, "I always decide!" And I say, "Well, that's because I've told you where I want to go, you don't feel like it, and so we do whatever you want, so I'm just skipping the step of me telling you what I want to do and you shooting it down!"

I don't really have strong feelings about where I want to eat or what I want to eat, but he does. I need to just tell him we're going to try the Mexican place next time, and just ignore him saying "I want a burger" because there are places I want to try!

theartistformerlyknownas · October 2014

I like the portmanteau.

DH is such a creature of habit, and it's making me irrationally annoyed about yogurt. He gets the Kroger brand "lite" Greek yogurt, while I get a more natural one without artificial sweeteners. Now that we've combined grocery bills and got a Costco membership, I wanted to get a case of Chobani or whatever from Costco - costs less, would last us 2 weeks, and maybe I can finally get him eating more natural foods (everything he eats is SUPER overprocessed and fake).

He said "well you can get that kind, but I'm still gonna get my Kroger one."

"But this is better for you."

"No it's not, it has 30 more calories."

"Well 60 additional calories a day (he eats 2 with lunch) isn't going to kill you, but all that aspartame might! Calories aren't all that matter. Or maybe you can cut back on the jelly beans if you're worried."

"I just like the other kind better."

"How do you know, you've never had this kind!"

Grrrrrr.

Cookie Pusher · October 2014

DH is, for lack of a better word, a slob. His mess does not bother him, nor does it bother him that I often cannot clean MY things because he has dropped his things on top of them. For example: his mail. We get a fair amount of catalogs (both requested and not requested) and junk mail. As he gets home before I do, he gets the mail and pulls out anything that is addressed to me. The rest, he puts in a pile on the coffee table. Until the pile is about a foot high, then he moves it to the floor. Once the pile on the coffee table has gotten high again, he'll move it to the arm chair. Next, new mail will go under the coffee table. When we're planning on having company over, I ask him a week beforehand to please sort and discard the mail - which to him means to move all the piles into a monster pile in the bedroom. I swear, there are ValPaks from FIVE YEARS AGO in there! He always tells me he's going to clean up, but I've yet to see it happen. It has now gotten to where I throw out anything that isn't a bill if we've had it more than a week. Oh, you can't find your car parts catalog? Should have actually looked at your mail!

cowgirl8238 · October 2014

Cookie Pusher, I think you have my Husbands Twin! He NEVER throws out his junk mail...ever! And he also has the habbit of sheding his clothes like a snake as he enters the house. So his shoes are by the door, then his socks, then his pants and belt, then his shirt...then he's there in his boxers with a whole trail of how he went throughout the house!

Cookie Pusher · October 2014

cowgirl8238 said:

Cookie Pusher, I think you have my Husbands Twin! He NEVER throws out his junk mail...ever! And he also has the habbit of sheding his clothes like a snake as he enters the house. So his shoes are by the door, then his socks, then his pants and belt, then his shirt...then he's there in his boxers with a whole trail of how he went throughout the house!

I swear, it's a guy thing. I know SO MANY guys who keep their junk mail for no good reason.

Fortunately, DH is very good about getting his clothes into the hamper. He also does all of his own laundry and ironing while I do mine. However, he's also the the kind of guy who, if he puts something on even for an hour, it has to go in the hamper and get washed afterwards - even if all he did in whatever he wore was lay on the couch. Yes, honey, the ratty t-shirt from high school that you wore while watching "Top Gear" got soiled by the couch that I Febreeze every week.

AprilH81 · October 2014

Cookie Pusher said:

DH is, for lack of a better word, a slob. His mess does not bother him, nor does it bother him that I often cannot clean MY things because he has dropped his things on top of them. For example: his mail. We get a fair amount of catalogs (both requested and not requested) and junk mail. As he gets home before I do, he gets the mail and pulls out anything that is addressed to me. The rest, he puts in a pile on the coffee table. Until the pile is about a foot high, then he moves it to the floor. Once the pile on the coffee table has gotten high again, he'll move it to the arm chair. Next, new mail will go under the coffee table. When we're planning on having company over, I ask him a week beforehand to please sort and discard the mail - which to him means to move all the piles into a monster pile in the bedroom. I swear, there are ValPaks from FIVE YEARS AGO in there! He always tells me he's going to clean up, but I've yet to see it happen. It has now gotten to where I throw out anything that isn't a bill if we've had it more than a week. Oh, you can't find your car parts catalog? Should have actually looked at your mail!

We may be married to the same man.

He may bring the mail in but he doesn't go through it at all, it sits on the counter until I go through it. I pay the bills, so I pull everything out that needs to be taken care of, shred the junk mail with our names and address on it and then a small pile for DH is left. It will sit for MONTHS... It keeps getting bigger and then I ask him to go through it about 5 times before he takes action. Most of it gets shredded, but there are always 3-4 envelopes that STILL hang out until I lose it over the mail.

That and DH always leaves dresser/cabinet doors open. Drives me freakin' crazy!

cupcait927 · October 2014

AprilH81 said:

Cookie Pusher said:

DH is, for lack of a better word, a slob. His mess does not bother him, nor does it bother him that I often cannot clean MY things because he has dropped his things on top of them. For example: his mail. We get a fair amount of catalogs (both requested and not requested) and junk mail. As he gets home before I do, he gets the mail and pulls out anything that is addressed to me. The rest, he puts in a pile on the coffee table. Until the pile is about a foot high, then he moves it to the floor. Once the pile on the coffee table has gotten high again, he'll move it to the arm chair. Next, new mail will go under the coffee table. When we're planning on having company over, I ask him a week beforehand to please sort and discard the mail - which to him means to move all the piles into a monster pile in the bedroom. I swear, there are ValPaks from FIVE YEARS AGO in there! He always tells me he's going to clean up, but I've yet to see it happen. It has now gotten to where I throw out anything that isn't a bill if we've had it more than a week. Oh, you can't find your car parts catalog? Should have actually looked at your mail!

We may be married to the same man.

He may bring the mail in but he doesn't go through it at all, it sits on the counter until I go through it. I pay the bills, so I pull everything out that needs to be taken care of, shred the junk mail with our names and address on it and then a small pile for DH is left. It will sit for MONTHS... It keeps getting bigger and then I ask him to go through it about 5 times before he takes action. Most of it gets shredded, but there are always 3-4 envelopes that STILL hang out until I lose it over the mail.

That and DH always leaves dresser/cabinet doors open. Drives me freakin' crazy!

H actually mentioned not shutting the cupboard doors in our vows because he's always, always leaves them open, along with the dresser drawers. I'm constantly closing drawers and doors and have banged my head on them more than a few times.

lovemyrunner · October 2014

@hellosweetie1015 my FI does the face lick thing too! It's so weird, where do they pick this up?? It's gotten so bad that now, when he grabs my hand, I immediately pull away because I don't know if he's going to kiss it or lick it. Although these days, I'm fighting fire with fire. He then responds "Ew gross! Where did you learn that?"

hellosweetie1015 · October 2014

lovemyrunner said:

@hellosweetie1015 my FI does the face lick thing too! It's so weird, where do they pick this up?? It's gotten so bad that now, when he grabs my hand, I immediately pull away because I don't know if he's going to kiss it or lick it. Although these days, I'm fighting fire with fire. He then responds "Ew gross! Where did you learn that?"

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS WHOLE CONCEPT. Like, my face is not especially lickable. I do not understand why he has the urge to do this.

theartistformerlyknownas · October 2014

hellosweetie1015 said:

lovemyrunner said:

@hellosweetie1015 my FI does the face lick thing too! It's so weird, where do they pick this up?? It's gotten so bad that now, when he grabs my hand, I immediately pull away because I don't know if he's going to kiss it or lick it. Although these days, I'm fighting fire with fire. He then responds "Ew gross! Where did you learn that?"

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS WHOLE CONCEPT. Like, my face is not especially lickable. I do not understand why he has the urge to do this.

I think I would throw up if DH ever licked my face.

steph861 · October 2014

cupcait927 said:

AprilH81 said:

Cookie Pusher said:

DH is, for lack of a better word, a slob. His mess does not bother him, nor does it bother him that I often cannot clean MY things because he has dropped his things on top of them. For example: his mail. We get a fair amount of catalogs (both requested and not requested) and junk mail. As he gets home before I do, he gets the mail and pulls out anything that is addressed to me. The rest, he puts in a pile on the coffee table. Until the pile is about a foot high, then he moves it to the floor. Once the pile on the coffee table has gotten high again, he'll move it to the arm chair. Next, new mail will go under the coffee table. When we're planning on having company over, I ask him a week beforehand to please sort and discard the mail - which to him means to move all the piles into a monster pile in the bedroom. I swear, there are ValPaks from FIVE YEARS AGO in there! He always tells me he's going to clean up, but I've yet to see it happen. It has now gotten to where I throw out anything that isn't a bill if we've had it more than a week. Oh, you can't find your car parts catalog? Should have actually looked at your mail!

We may be married to the same man.

He may bring the mail in but he doesn't go through it at all, it sits on the counter until I go through it. I pay the bills, so I pull everything out that needs to be taken care of, shred the junk mail with our names and address on it and then a small pile for DH is left. It will sit for MONTHS... It keeps getting bigger and then I ask him to go through it about 5 times before he takes action. Most of it gets shredded, but there are always 3-4 envelopes that STILL hang out until I lose it over the mail.

That and DH always leaves dresser/cabinet doors open. Drives me freakin' crazy!

H actually mentioned not shutting the cupboard doors in our vows because he's always, always leaves them open, along with the dresser drawers. I'm constantly closing drawers and doors and have banged my head on them more than a few times.

My FI does this this too. He'll put the toilet seat back down every time, but drawers and cupboards? Forget about it.

When he does laundry, he'll only do his unless I explicitly ask him to include mine. If you're washing a certain colour, was everything in the hamper that is that colour! It didn't even occur to him to wash both of our clothes until I called him on it. He's finally asking me if I have anything I want him to wash, but for the longest time it would drive me absolutely crazy.

ETA: oh! The dishwasher door! He leaves that fucking thing all the way open ALL THE TIME. Whyyyyy does it need to be open all the time?! It always gets in my way when I go in the kitchen.

hellosweetie1015 · October 2014

lolo883 said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

lovemyrunner said:

@hellosweetie1015 my FI does the face lick thing too! It's so weird, where do they pick this up?? It's gotten so bad that now, when he grabs my hand, I immediately pull away because I don't know if he's going to kiss it or lick it. Although these days, I'm fighting fire with fire. He then responds "Ew gross! Where did you learn that?"

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS WHOLE CONCEPT. Like, my face is not especially lickable. I do not understand why he has the urge to do this.

I think I would throw up if DH ever licked my face.

It is generally not pleasant but I haven't yet broken him of it. I have yet to barf, but I don't know how because I have MAJOR issues with bodily fluids in general.

lovemyrunner · October 2014

hellosweetie1015 said:

lolo883 said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

lovemyrunner said:

@hellosweetie1015 my FI does the face lick thing too! It's so weird, where do they pick this up?? It's gotten so bad that now, when he grabs my hand, I immediately pull away because I don't know if he's going to kiss it or lick it. Although these days, I'm fighting fire with fire. He then responds "Ew gross! Where did you learn that?"

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS WHOLE CONCEPT. Like, my face is not especially lickable. I do not understand why he has the urge to do this.

I think I would throw up if DH ever licked my face.

It is generally not pleasant but I haven't yet broken him of it. I have yet to barf, but I don't know how because I have MAJOR issues with bodily fluids in general.

I'm a nurse, so it's really hard to gross me out. But I think it's super weird and I fear for his sanity.

larrygaga · October 2014

I love licking FI's face. I do the thing where I pretend to go in for a kiss and get him. He will either get mad or lick me back. I have no idea why it's so tempting to do it, but I hate getting licked in my face so I understand why he and all of you get mad.

Just be flatter that your face is so delicous.

hellosweetie1015 · October 2014

lovemyrunner said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

lolo883 said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

lovemyrunner said:

@hellosweetie1015 my FI does the face lick thing too! It's so weird, where do they pick this up?? It's gotten so bad that now, when he grabs my hand, I immediately pull away because I don't know if he's going to kiss it or lick it. Although these days, I'm fighting fire with fire. He then responds "Ew gross! Where did you learn that?"

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THIS WHOLE CONCEPT. Like, my face is not especially lickable. I do not understand why he has the urge to do this.

I think I would throw up if DH ever licked my face.

It is generally not pleasant but I haven't yet broken him of it. I have yet to barf, but I don't know how because I have MAJOR issues with bodily fluids in general.

I'm a nurse, so it's really hard to gross me out. But I think it's super weird and I fear for his sanity.

If he ever tells you where he got that from, let me know and we'll compare notes, haha. It might be the key to preventing future generations from continuing the face-licking epidemic of the mid-2010s.

When you just wanna smack him...

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