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We got married on friday at the court house, but now we want to have a ceremony and reception in Feb

gracelyn64gracelyn64 member
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I need your help. We got married on Friday, but we are planning a ceremony and reception in February.  Few people know that we got married since my family i have no family here, only his family and our friends know.
So, I have to announce the wedding
Send save the dates (when do I send those out?...was thinking about after thanksgiving as a christmas/STD post card
Have a ceremony of sorts - candlelit... this is my BIG deal... have no idea how to do if i am already married and no one knows :)
Then reception

The theme is Tying the knot.
Purple, Gold, White

I know it sounds like i have it all planned, but I need suggestions for the ceremony format.... ????
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Re: We got married on friday at the court house, but now we want to have a ceremony and reception in Feb

  • artbyallieartbyallie mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    You already tied the knot, yay! Congratulations on your wedding.

    Others have already addressed the main points here, so I'm just going to drop the link to our little FAQ for this situation.

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  • charlieyankee03charlieyankee03 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited October 2014
    So much no.

    The second sticky on this board is regarding throwing a PPD (pretty princess day/ceremony and reception after already being married). It is widely suggested that people lurk for a while for this exact reason. These things come up a lot and are discussed ad nauseum. 

    No matter how many people know you got married on Friday (congratulations!!), that number will grow exponentially by the time your new "ceremony" rolls around. People do not keep secrets like that. I suggest that instead of Save the Dates, send out wedding announcements. Instead of wedding invitations, send out invitations to your party celebrating your recent marriage. Want people to see that kickass dress you wore? Put up a bunch of photos of you and your groom dressed to the nines. This doesn't mean you can't wear white during your party, just find an elegant and beautiful cocktail dress. 

    Good luck and congrats again on becoming a Mrs.!
    __________________________________________________________________________

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  • chibiyuichibiyui member
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    Congrats on your marriage!

    Throw a kick ass party, skip the vows.

    Or at the very least, tell your guests that you're already married.
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    Anniversary
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  • climbingsingleclimbingsingle member
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    Congrats on getting married!

    Unless you plan on divorcing your spouse before February, you don't get another ceremony. You're already married. Why are you ok with lying to your friends and relatives?

    Send out marriage announcements and then have a party in February. No fake redo.
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  • larrygagalarrygaga member
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    edited October 2014
    A courthouse wedding is still a wedding! You can still plan an amazing wedding celebration! Congrats on your marriage!!!

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  • ohannabelleohannabelle member
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    The knot has already been tied, and you're married!
    Congratulations!
    Please don't even think about lying to people and having a pretend wedding. 
    Buy a beautiful evening gown, plan a beautiful candlelit dinner or party or whatever, and send invitations to the "celebration of your recent marriage."
    Enjoy.

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  • jenajjthrjenajjthr member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Ditto X1000
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  • CMGragainCMGragain member
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    edited October 2014
    This is proper wording for your wedding announcement.  Send it to all of your friends and family immediately.

    Bride's Full Maiden Name
    and
    Groom's Full Name
    announce their marriage
    Date
    City, State

    No other information should be included.  Congratulations on your marriage! 

    You may have a party to celebrate any time you wish.  Send out invitations just like for any party.  What you should NOT do is to have another "wedding ceremony".  You only get one of those, and you had yours when you signed the courthouse papers.
    No white wedding dress, no bridesmaids, no bouquet tossing, no cake cutting and feeding each other ceremony, no "first dance".  You gave all that up when you decided to have a courthouse wedding.  You can have a beautiful party with food, alcohol, and dancing, though.  Get a lovely formal dress if you want to - just not a "wedding dress".
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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  • mollyringwald15mollyringwald15 member
    Name Dropper First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Also calling MUD
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  • mrstrevor3mrstrevor3 member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    image

    That is all.
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  • theartistformerlyknownastheartistformerlyknownas member
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    Aw man, we were so polite. Wasted.
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  • raissyraisraissyrais member
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    MUD?!
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  • auriannaaurianna member
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    In the event this isn't MUD, I vote:

    Wedding announcements as PPs have mentioned.
    Invitations to a PARTY (not a wedding reception) in February
    I doubt anyone would offer since you are already married, but kindly decline any showers anyone might offer.
    Have your party in Feb (no bridal party, no white dress, no special dances except perhaps an "opening the floor" with your husband
    Then, on your anniversary in a year, do a completely private candlelit vow renewal with just your husband if the candles is something you really want. Or, wait 10 years or so and do a candlelit vow renewal and invite lots of people (but don't treat it like a wedding. Still no poofy gown, no bridal party, etc)
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  • JeeGooDowsterJeeGooDowster member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    What's MUD??  
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  • slothiegalslothiegal member
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    carynNchan said:
    What's MUD??  
    Made Up Drama.
    Anniversary

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  • JeeGooDowsterJeeGooDowster member
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    slothiegal said:
    carynNchan said:
    What's MUD??  
    Made Up Drama.
    Ah Ok...yeah i think it could be a MUD...but I actually thought it was a semi-joke!
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  • mrs4everhartmrs4everhart member
    First Comment First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer
    I'm inclined to think this is MUD as well. But if not, it seems outside of the where and when your actual question is about ceremony formatting?

    That's going to depend on a lot of different things of course, OP.

    In one sentence you say prior to this event you'll be sending out announcements. Then you say you're unsure to proceed because people don't know you're already married. I guess that leaves the question: then what are you announcing?

    If you're just looking for ceremony resources, I'm not being a smartass, just Google whatever type of ceremony you're interested in. Your clergy person (if you're involving a place of worship) will likely have a ceremony he/she may prefer or may allow you to modify to your liking or situation with prior approval.
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  • wrigleyvillewrigleyville member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    Reaction GIF: what the fuck?
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