Did you know your proposal was coming?

theycallmelinz · November 2014

There was a thread on the E board that mentioned a girl knowing her BF had the ring and she'd done like 90% of the planning for the wedding while he still hadn't proposed. IMO that is craycray, and kind of takes the fun out of it. FI and I knew we were the person each other wanted to marry, but before he actually proposed to me I refused to do ANY wedding planning or talk, no matter how much my FMIL or mother tried to get me to do it. When the time finally came, I had NO idea it was happening. In fact, I said this in another thread but the day it happened before-hand, I was bitching to my best friend about how I was tired of waiting on him to do it when I was ready and obviously he wasn't ready because he hadn't even started trying to save money to buy a ring. Ha. Joke was on me, he'd had the ring for over a month.

On the other hand, I once knew a girl who "went away to get engaged." They seriously went on vacation over the weekend TO get engaged. Weird.

Did you guys know your proposal was coming or were you taken by surprise?

esstee33 · November 2014

I knew it was coming, since I basically picked out my ring and I knew he'd bought it. We'd never seen it in person, so when he got it in the mail, he showed it to me so I could say "Yes, that's definitely the one" or not. Then he "hid" it, although I knew where it was the whole time. It was ridiculous haha.

We had planned a trip to go hiking in a big state park where he'd never been, and he was acting WEIRD AS FUCK the entire week leading up to it. So I absolutely knew he was planning to propose then. He didn't, because he didn't realize how many people would be around at all times, and he knows I get super panicky when I'm the center of attention like that. He was super bummed out, we talked about it, and all was well. He ended up waking me up at like 6:30 in the morning three days later and did it then.

So in the end it did end up being a surprise, but mostly because I was only half-awake.

ETA: I had already bought a dress and shoes because I found them on clearance and they were perfect, but I drew a hard line at any further serious planning, and I most certainly wasn't interested in looking at venues or any other such things.

Peaseblossom55 · November 2014

I got proposed to while on vacation in the Bahamas in March '13. I knew he bought the ring sometime in December. I didn't know or think he was going to propose then really so it was a surprise. He has someone take our picture and then while the picture was being taken he got down on one knee and proposed the look of shock on my face was priceless.

novella1186 · November 2014

I had no idea. FI actually had my ring for 6 months and tried FIVE different times to propose. I kept accidentally ruining his plans because I didn't get what was going on. Poor guy. On the night that he popped the question, he tried TWICE to propose and I messed both of those up, so when we got back in the car he finally did it. In the car. While Piano Man was on the radio. It was awesome and amazing. AND even then I almost got out of the car in the middle of his proposal cuz my dumbass STILL didn't get what was going on and I was hungry.

After I found out how many times I had messed up his plans I felt so bad, but I'm so glad it was a total surprise cuz it was the most amazing feeling in the world! I don't think I've ever been so shocked and happy in my whole life. And I actually love telling the story of how it happened

Heffalump · November 2014

I knew, just because DH planned a weekend away. I'm the planner in our relationship, he's usually asking "Where are we staying? What time are we leaving?" etc. So when he made all the plans, I knew.

climbingsingle · November 2014

I had no idea it was coming. I was totally shocked. We had only been dating for 5 months. We talked about getting married, but I honestly thought if he proposed, it would be somewhere around our year anniversary.

ShesSoCold · November 2014

I knew it was coming. It's a long story, but we had been together 5 years and he'd done something stupid and I had a "I'm not dealing with this shit if we have no future" thing. He said he'd been planning anyway, but I helped pick out the setting (we'd bought the stone but I didn't know he was going to make an E-ring out of it). So I knew it was coming because if it wasn't, I was going.

I didn't know on the day he proposed though.

theartistformerlyknownas · November 2014

lulu411 said:

There was a thread on the E board that mentioned a girl knowing her BF had the ring and she'd done like 90% of the planning for the wedding while he still hadn't proposed. IMO that is craycray, and kind of takes the fun out of it. FI and I knew we were the person each other wanted to marry, but before he actually proposed to me I refused to do ANY wedding planning or talk, no matter how much my FMIL or mother tried to get me to do it. When the time finally came, I had NO idea it was happening. In fact, I said this in another thread but the day it happened before-hand, I was bitching to my best friend about how I was tired of waiting on him to do it when I was ready and obviously he wasn't ready because he hadn't even started trying to save money to buy a ring. Ha. Joke was on me, he'd had the ring for over a month.

On the other hand, I once knew a girl who "went away to get engaged." They seriously went on vacation over the weekend TO get engaged. Weird.

Did you guys know your proposal was coming or were you taken by surprise?

Mine was a little of both. I thought it was coming eventually, but thought he'd wait at least until after the hubbub of Christmas. Instead he pre-empted it and proposed on 12/14 and caught me completely by surprise.

To the bolded, similar story here. I felt like a giant ass because I had a mini-breakdown a few weeks before because EVERYONE was asking "when are you gonna get engaged? do you think he'll propose now? how about NOW?!" and I was like "MOTHERFUCKERS IT'S NOT UP TO ME AND NO I DON'T THINK HE'S GONNA PROPOSE RIGHT NOW GODDAMMIT SO STOP ASKING." (Mind you, people had been hypothesizing about a proposal for 8 months at this point.) He could tell I was bumming about something and so I told him it just made me sad to constantly get asked about it and have to say "nope" but I didn't want to pressure him if he wasn't ready. Turns out he had already bought the ring and then HE felt like an ass because he wanted to badly to just go get it and propose right then to cheer me up, but really wanted to stick to his plan and knew I would feel bad if I felt like I ruined it for myself.

flutteringinfl · November 2014

It took me by surprise. We'd been talking about marriage for awhile but still agreed that we would do it the traditional way and wait until he was ready to propose to consider ourselves engaged. Still I'll admit I was getting a little antsy and found the process a little archaic. But in the end, I'm glad I waited and let him plan out the perfect moment.

birdybride2014 · November 2014

I had tiny ideas that it was possibly coming (i.e.-for Christmas and my birthday he had no clue what he was going to get me as a gift, but he said he already had a gift for our 2 year anniversary and wasn't worried about thinking of anything at all, so a ring had crossed my mind) but even when we went out on our date for our two year anniversary,and I could clearly see the defined shape of the ring box in his pants pockets, I still wasn't convinced and thought I was crazy. I was honestly blind sighted by being proposed to, even though looking back it should have been clearly obvious lol.

cupcait927 · November 2014

I knew it was coming because I accidentally found the ring in his sock drawer. We had talked about marriage and had gone to look at rings 8 months prior, but I had zero idea when he was going to actually do it. Well, I was putting laundry away one day and opened his sock drawer and saw a little black box. I didn't open it and to this day H does not know that I found it. I had no idea when he was actually going to propose and I didn't want to ruin the surprise and whatever he had planned. He ended up proposing a few days later and I was still taken by surprise (though looking back on it, he was acting super weird so I should've been tipped off).

blabla89 · November 2014

I kind of knew, because we had talked about our timeline. FI was very insistent that we needed to go to the Botanical Garden on a particular day. I think I said something like, "these next few weekends are kind of busy, let's wait till April, it will be warmer and more flowers will be blooming then" and he was like, "NO IT HAS TO BE MARCH 29." We don't usually make firm plans for the weekends, so I knew something was up.

As it turned out the ring came in 3 weeks earlier than expected, and one Saturday we took an impromptu day trip and he surprised me there. Later I found out he had planned this big, elaborate proposal complete with a paparazzi photographer (which apparently requires special permission from the Botanical Garden management) but then when the ring came in he just couldn't wait.

flutteringinfl · November 2014

birdybride2014 said:

I had tiny ideas that it was possibly coming (i.e.-for Christmas and my birthday he had no clue what he was going to get me as a gift, but he said he already had a gift for our 2 year anniversary and wasn't worried about thinking of anything at all, so a ring had crossed my mind) but even when we went out on our date for our two year anniversary,and I could clearly see the defined shape of the ring box in his pants pockets, I still wasn't convinced and thought I was crazy. I was honestly blind sighted by being proposed to, even though looking back it should have been clearly obvious lol.

In the moment I probably should have noticed too. He wanted us to get our picture taken at Disney and asked me to stand over where we'd get it done while he talked to the photographer. I thought he was just telling her how to work his camera but he was also telling her he was going to propose. The way he definitely hid his mouth at that point and fidgeted with his pocket should have been a sign, but I was oblivious. I'm kind of glad though. It made the moment even cooler to not know what was coming.

littlemushroom · November 2014

We had talked about getting engaged and I told him that whenever he actually proposed I wanted it to be a surprise.

The ring I loved was on sale when we looked so he went ahead and bought it even though he wasn't planning to propose for a while. He teased me about how he was going to set it on the TV stand in the box so I had to stare at it for a few months until he proposed. This was October, and I was sure he was going to wait until around the holidays or our anniversary in January.

He ended up proposing a week after he got the ring. I was very surprised because I thought it wasn't going to happen for a while. He had decided he didn't want to wait because he already knew he wanted to marry me.

plainjane0415 · November 2014

FI and I dated for 7 years before he proposed, I had picked out a ring a year prior to the engagement, and I was still TOTALLY SHOCKED when it happened. FI ended up asking me at his surprise birthday party I threw for him (he found out about it apparently) so all of our friends and family were there, but only my parents knew that he was going to ask me. It was such a memorable and special moment and I'm so glad that I didn't see it coming!

Jells2dot0 · November 2014

Both, actually. We had discussed getting married for years, but I knew DH had some reservations about it because of his first marriage. It took me awhile, but I had finally content about the idea of just being "life partners". He took me aside one day and said he was ready. I was stunned. So, when he proposed, I knew it was coming and I figured it would be on my birthday since it was a few weeks from when he spoke with me about it. I didn't pick out my ring, so that was a surprise. So, in the end, I knew it was coming and most likely when, but didn't know about the ring. In fact, we got engaged 4 years ago today!!!

flyingfoxes · November 2014

Nope. We had already told each other we wanted to get married someday, but I thought it would be after he was back from deployment and we'd lived together. Instead he did it when he was home on R&R. I loved it, it was a fantastic, romantic surprise. He did it at the colonial B&B we stayed at while visiting his kids in St. Charles MO (outside of St. Louis).

jenna8984 · November 2014

I was surprised. We had obviously talked about it and knew we'd get married one day, but I thought the proposal would be about 6 months to a year after it actually took place.

I agree though, I think planning beforehand takes the "fun" out of it so I wouldn't allow myself a Pinterest board or looking at dresses or anything until it actually happened.

loro929 · November 2014

I had no idea! He actually bought the ring months beforehand. We were on vacation in Venice when he popped the question. We usually go to Italy in the summer so I didn't really think anything of it, but looking back in retrospect there were many different little signs I was totally oblivious too. For instance, he was carrying around this man-purse the whole day, which he never does (but apparently he had the ring with him and was waiting for the "right, most perfect" moment).

Since it was a surprise, I had no clue that he bought a ring, but apparently about 6 months earlier, he already told my parents his intention, so for them it was a big waiting game until it happened. For me, ignorance was bliss

It was really an amazing feel of happiness and shock not expecting anything. Truly one of the best, most exciting and joyful moments of my life.

novella1186 · November 2014

I will add that I had a clue that it would maybe happen eventually, because when FI and I had been dating for a few months he said "I want to be an old person with you!" My heart kind of melted.

lacqueredlover · November 2014

I was pretty surprised. We had talked about getting married and knew it was what we both wanted and I figured maybe we would be engaged by the end of 2014. In fact I had dinner with my bff like 2 weeks before and she asked me when I thought we would get engaged and I told her probably winter 2014 early 2015.

He and I had planned a trip back in the Spring to go to Nashville over labor day weekend because we knew his ex wife was taking the kids to the beach that weekend so we wouldn't have any time with them (usually even weekends we don't have them overnight we see them at least one day.) Right before I left, a coworker asked me if I thought I would be getting engaged. I laughed and said no way. She got a text message 48 hours later that he had proposed! I literally had no idea haha, we were walking around Nashville, it was raining, we went to some random Tennessee state museum and then up to this structure that overlooked the town we just happened to bump into, While up there, he had someone take our pic and then proposed! Apparently he had talked to my parents the week before, got the ring that my mom had for me (it was her mothers, my brothers wife wears the one that was my dads mothers) and knew he would propose in Nashville but he had no idea how. He just kinda winged it and it was perfect! He told me after how scared he was walking around with the ring in his pocket! I was SO surprised (apparently I didn't say yes and he had to prompt me haha I was so in shock and then I burst into tears about 15 minutes later.) It's been over 2 months and I'm still surprised!

As for planning before getting engaged, I think that's crazy. And takes the fun out of getting engaged and being engaged for a minute before jumping into it.

JennyColada · November 2014

It wasn't a surprise that he proposed, but it was a surprise when he did it.

He had talked about getting married and tried on rings together. I knew that he bought the ring (he lied and said it was at his dad's though!). We agreed to wait at least six months in the relationship. So I thought it would be on my birthday when we ate at the restaurant that we had our first date.

Nope. Five months. On Christmas.

He got me a pair of diamond earrings and, like a jerk, I laugh "an I going to get a ring to match?" (Thinking that if course I won't...but in his mind he knew that I would in about 6 hours!).

[Deleted User] · November 2014

I knew the ring was in the house (it was my grandmother's and my mom gave it to FI), but didn't know when it was coming.

I kinda ruined his plan, he was going to do it in this beautiful park we like to take our bikes to. Instead, I was crabby from a bad day of work and said it was too late and didn't feel like going. So he made dinner then popped the question at home after (using our son to help!)

kaitlynmichelle · November 2014

I totally knew. H designed my ring with input from me so I knew when the ring was being made. He had a few questions for me throughout the process. This also was happening a month before our 9 year anniversary so it was pretty obvious.

We always go on a ski trip for our anniversary too, so I knew it would be on the trip. I didn't know specifically when, so he still caught me by surprise. We went snowshoeing in the late afternoon before going out for dinner and he stopped in the middle of the snowy forest at sunset. It was amazing and no one else was anywhere near us.

I really didn't mind knowing it was coming. After almost 9 years, I was a bit BSC and knowing it was finally happening was actually helpful for that! I had bought nothing for the wedding, or made plans. I had ideas in my head of course but no research or plans were made until we were engaged.

NowIamMrsKlein · November 2014

I knew and yet he still managed to throw me off. We had picked out the ring together at a jeweller in the city we had been living in in September and then he ended up getting transferred to another province and we up and left before having the chance to buy the ring. So it was really hard for him to keep the whole process a secret as he had to come up with excuses to drive the 7 hours back home without me to order and pay for it and then to pick it up.

He tried to go in December under the disguise of Christmas present shopping and delivering but then there was a giant blizzard that forced him to stay home. So then poor guy was trying to come up with excuses to go in January. I would tease him and be like you know what else you could buy while your down..... and he would play all innocent.

So I knew he had ordered it in January, and then he went back down in March to visit his brother so I knew that he was picking up the ring. So when he got home from that trip I knew the ring was in his possession and it was only a matter of time. He threw me off by doing it that night after supper in our living room. He knew that I would expect him to wait a couple days to make sure I didn't know when it was coming so he thought that the best way to surprise me was doing it right then and there. It was perfect.

I have to admit I was a bit BSC for a week or two in February because it had been 6 months since we had chosen the ring and we had had the discussion about getting married and obviously agreed it was what we both wanted and that we both wanted it sooner rather than later. So I wanted to just be engaged, I didnt need the ring or grand proposal. I think I said "We've decided that we want to get married, so why cant we consider ourselves engaged?" several times. But he's a traditional man and wanted the ring and proposal. I eventually calmed down and went with the flow but there was definitely some minor crazy girl in there.

raissyrais · November 2014

Not to freak anyone out but I have very, very vivid dreams that can let me see what will happen in the future. Obviously they relate to me so it might be just my brain trying to show me what my deepest desires are through dreams. I knew exactly what date FI was going to propose, how when and what ring I was getting. I did have my heart set on a stone and style but I had yet to see it in the flesh.

I knew I had to organize the dinner cruise on the Saint Laurent since he was coming to Montreal on a business trip from Toronto and wouldn't have had time to do anything. I guess the setting was perfect and the moon was full and bright. And he whispered it in my ear, just like I dreamt it! *Swoon*

theycallmelinz · November 2014

SoontobeMrsKlein said:

I knew and yet he still managed to throw me off. We had picked out the ring together at a jeweller in the city we had been living in in September and then he ended up getting transferred to another province and we up and left before having the chance to buy the ring. So it was really hard for him to keep the whole process a secret as he had to come up with excuses to drive the 7 hours back home without me to order and pay for it and then to pick it up.

He tried to go in December under the disguise of Christmas present shopping and delivering but then there was a giant blizzard that forced him to stay home. So then poor guy was trying to come up with excuses to go in January. I would tease him and be like you know what else you could buy while your down..... and he would play all innocent.

So I knew he had ordered it in January, and then he went back down in March to visit his brother so I knew that he was picking up the ring. So when he got home from that trip I knew the ring was in his possession and it was only a matter of time. He threw me off by doing it that night after supper in our living room. He knew that I would expect him to wait a couple days to make sure I didn't know when it was coming so he thought that the best way to surprise me was doing it right then and there. It was perfect.

I have to admit I was a bit BSC for a week or two in February because it had been 6 months since we had chosen the ring and we had had the discussion about getting married and obviously agreed it was what we both wanted and that we both wanted it sooner rather than later. So I wanted to just be engaged, I didnt need the ring or grand proposal. I think I said "We've decided that we want to get married, so why cant we consider ourselves engaged?" several times. But he's a traditional man and wanted the ring and proposal. I eventually calmed down and went with the flow but there was definitely some minor crazy girl in there.

Haha I did the same thing. I was like I JUST WANT TO KNOW YOU'RE COMMITTED!!! I think relationships and love make us all a little BSC haha.

VulgarGirl · November 2014

Well since I did the proposing...yeah I knew it was coming. She had no idea though, she knew I wanted to marry her but didn't know I was actually going to ask her.

And when she re-asked me later because we were engaged for fucking ever, I didn't really know she was going to come and ask me.

WinstonsGirl · November 2014

I had an idea, but wasn't expecting it. About 3 weeks before, we were at the mall and he asked if I wanted to go into jewellery stores to look around, which I found weird cos I don't wear jewellery. But he brushed it off as looking for Christmas ideas, so I did too.

I was pretty sure he was doing it though when he was sitting in the car acting weird and nervous for 10 minutes before asking me to go hang outside in -35C to look at the moon (lunar eclipse). He wasn't actually planning on doing it then. He wanted to wait for New Years, so didn't have the ring on him. I got it when we went home that night.

loveislouder · November 2014

I knew it was coming because we picked the ring together, but i wasn't supposed to know when. That being said, he's a terrible liar and my sister is an idiot. We were going to his Mom's cabin and he was like "It's Grandpa's birthday this weekend (grandpa's birthday is in November so nope) so we bought him a present, but it has to stay in the mini fridge in the man cave because its melty.(I never go in the man cave)" then when we were leaving "We're having a champagne toast for Grandpa so if you see any don't say anything." Grandpa doesn't drink. Then he insisted on bringing the sweater he wore on our first date, even though the weather was supposed to be 35 C all weekend, and everyone was googly eye-ing us every time we went somewhere alone. I had my suspcions.

princessofgenovia · November 2014

I was very suprised, but I also knew it was coming.

We'd been together a little over 6 months when he told me he was pretty sure he wanted to me marry me. At the year mark we actually had the marriage discussion, I wasn't ready yet and also I wanted to be done with grad school before we got engaged. Then around 1.5 years together, we decided to move in together when our leases ended and I told him then that we could talk about forever now.

He popped the question right after we moved in, like...sweaty, gross, everything still in boxes, he drops to one knee all "I can't wait anymore, marry me?", he'd bought the right the day before my graduation ceremony. He'd thought about asking me then, then the fourth of July, then he decided he'd wait until my birthday. Then he decided fuck it, because he couldn't hold out that long.

I was surprised it happened when it did, I figured around my birthday or Christmas he might ask. But I'm kind of glad it didn't end up being a big huge romantic thing. I like that it was simple and just because he couldn't wait anymore. Also I probably would have stumbled over the ring between us moving in together and my birthday or Christmas.

Did you know your proposal was coming?

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