Not Engaged Yet

Can we start over?

edited November 2014 in Not Engaged Yet
Ok, so...Im sorry. (If I knew how to do gifs I would put a sad looking cat or puppy here)
I was soooooo sensitive yesterday, bratty and catty, down right wrong and bitchy. 
I went back and read the posts and I'm so disappointed in myself,I reverted right back to the middle school me (sad)
The main thing that brought about my freak out was when some of the ladies started talking about me bouncing from guy to guy after my break up from my fiance. We were together for 5 years and that break up was hard on me. I am not proud of a lot of the choices I made as far as my dating life. I was very hurt and very vulnerable and I did jump into some bad situations and make some poor choices and being called out on those bad choices really hit a sore spot for me and made me super defensive. (Not a valid excuse just an explanation)
I meant what I said that I do like this board, and want to stick around. 
I like my new boyfriend and although the relationship is still very new and may have already moved too quickly, he is truly a great guy and  I dont want to mess it up and I think the advice from the ladies on this board will be good for me. Hard to swallow at times, but still good for me. 
I completely understand that you ladies probably think I'm crazy (you may not be totally wrong on that one) and want to steer clear of me and I get that but I'm going to stick around a little longer and see if I can make amends. 
So what do you say? Redo?

ChemFanatic25

Re: Can we start over?

  • Hey you're good in my book @lifeisajourney but I'm relatively new as well and not engaged anymore so my opinion might not count. :-)
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    lifeisajourney
  • Look, getting defensive happens. I'm sure I was defensive when I first got called out on my BSC-ness all those years ago. I'm glad you realized that most of us are coming from a place of having been where you've been and wanting to keep you from making the same mistakes we did.

    It's not necessarily a bad thing to jump from guy to guy for a few months at a time, just make sure you are taking the time to yourself that you need. Before any relationship will work, you have to be content with who you are and know that you would be ok on your own.

    Welcome back.
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    "You are made of win." -SopChick
    Still here and still fabulous!

    lifeisajourney
  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    For me, it wasn't that you got defensive about the advice you were receiving on your own thread, it was when you became sarcastic on another thread and it seemed like you were making fun of us but saying you wanted to be friends with us all at once. You can't expect people to be inviting and friendly when you're acting like that. 

    That said, I don't tend to hold grudges so I'm good with cheers-ing our morning coffees and moving forward. 

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    lifeisajourney
  • Hummingbird125Hummingbird125 New York member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    @lifeisajourney - I didn't chime in yesterday, but that thread was great bedtime reading and I'm all caught up.

    The way you become "accepted" as part of this community is by doing a LOT of lurking, and by participating and showing us - time and time again - that A) You're not crazypants and B) Whenever you become crazypants you can take in good advice without getting upset. If you do that enough, while also managing to add something worthwhile to our discussions here, you will naturally become a part of the community.

    I probably lurked on her for a good 6 months before I started posting regularly, and I still posted some stupid things and got a little snarky with some regs at least once. They put me in my place. I stuck with it, learned a LOT from these ladies, and am now happily engaged and - even more importantly - have AMAZING IRL friendships with several of the "popular" girls.

    Good luck.
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  • @lifesajourney‌ I didn't chime in yesterday either, because I'm still new here. But these ladies do have great advice, and I've found them to be very welcoming. It's just like in real life, forming new friendships and relationships takes work. I always say it's totally fine to make mistakes, just own them when you do. It's great that you've apologized and want to start with a clean slate.
  • Hey if you had the balls to come back and apologize and realize that you were being defensive, you're fine in my book.  We've all been there, we've all made shitty choices, we've all been bratty/defensive but the trick in life is to recognize it, apologize, and move forward.  

    So welcome!  Open yourself  and you'll find you get awesome advice on here.  You won't be coddled, you won't be validated (unless what you're doing is right and then you'll totally be validated) but you can learn a lot.
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    CLoGreenEyeslifeisajourneyAuroraRose41
  • GoldenPenguinGoldenPenguin Upstate NY mod
    Moderator Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its
    Sure, welcome. File:Whatever.gif



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    peekaboo2011cu97tiger
  • See? Own it, apologize, all good.

    We're not crazy ladies. Or mean.
    GoldenPenguinKeptInStitches
  • What @lacqueredlover‌ said. I think it shows a lot that you're willing to come back, apologize for your role in the drama, and want to try again. Welcome back!
  • peekaboo2011peekaboo2011 Washington, DC member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 250 Love Its Name Dropper
    Are you wearing pink?
    I french with my man
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  • @lifeisajourney, there have been more egregious mistakes made by new posters. But I echo what @loves2shop4shoes said, do NOT make this a pattern where you freak out major and then come crawling back with apologies the next day. 

    That being said, @peekaboo2011, I have pink roses on my undies, does that count? My winter wardrobe is shockingly dominated by blues and greens. 
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    "You're our early 20's BSC scarecrow. They cower at your maturity." - lennonkdc Anniversary
  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I'm wearing black. 

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    GoldenPenguinChemFanatic25speakeasy14
  • GoldenPenguinGoldenPenguin Upstate NY mod
    Moderator Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its
    I forgot and wore teal. 



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  • peekaboo2011peekaboo2011 Washington, DC member
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    @audrewuh @goldenpenguin @swazzle You guys suck at this game.
    I french with my man
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  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches the Northern Plains member
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    I'm wearing a red shirt, which is like dark pink, right?
    [Deleted User]
  • lmcooper86lmcooper86 Toronto member
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    I failed hard today and am wearing green. But my nails are pink! Acceptable?

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  • I'm wearing blue.  My lipstick is pink though!
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  • NONE OF US CAN SIT WITH US.
    I have a tshirt that says "You Can't Sit With Us."  I'm so putting it on when I get home.
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  • NONE OF US CAN SIT WITH US.
    I have a tshirt that says "You Can't Sit With Us."  I'm so putting it on when I get home.
    Is the t-shirt pink?
  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I actually am wearing pink today...but now I have to sit by myself which is no fun :(


  • NONE OF US CAN SIT WITH US.
    I have a tshirt that says "You Can't Sit With Us."  I'm so putting it on when I get home.
    Is the t-shirt pink?
    Nope.  It's black.  Like my soul.
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    GoldenPenguin
  • lmcooper86lmcooper86 Toronto member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    Mean Girls is fully on tv right now.

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  • kaitlynmichellekaitlynmichelle British Columbia member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Name Dropper
    @bethsmiles‌ I'm also in pink. Let us sit together since we are awesome.
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    bethsmiles
  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
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  • SwazzleSwazzle New Jersey member
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    NONE OF US CAN SIT WITH US.
    I have a tshirt that says "You Can't Sit With Us."  I'm so putting it on when I get home.
    I have a grey one with black writing that I wore to bed last night hahaha



    GoldenPenguin
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