What's even crazier is that Karen was all, "I never judged Cathy! Look, I have a FB message to prove it!" And the FB message she then forwarded me completely contradicts that.
What's even crazier is that Karen was all, "I never judged Cathy! Look, I have a FB message to prove it!" And the FB message she then forwarded me completed contradicts that.
This has so many levels of crazy, you guys.
Sometimes I feel like levels of crazy parallel the circles of hell.
I find it very strange that these women are in their mid thirties with families of their own and still are so worried about drama that's in the past. They should have more important things to worry about. But like I said in an earlier post, I know people like this too, unfortunately.
I definitely think that you made the right choice to end those friendships. Toxic is what they sound like.
I feel like the older I get, the more...picky...I am about who I am friends with. Quality over quantity. KWIM?
This. So much this. It always amazes me when adults fail to act like adults and revel in drama. I just can't. It honestly gives me anxiety. This is probably why I went from someone who had tons of "friends" to someone who made a wedding guest list and decided there were only about 15 people who I REALLY care if they attend.
Are they really that bored with their lives that they have nothing else to talk about other than shit that happened 3 years? And at your wedding, no less?
If they need something to talk about, they can join a book club. Sheesh.
What's even crazier is that Karen was all, "I never judged Cathy! Look, I have a FB message to prove it!" And the FB message she then forwarded me completed contradicts that.
This has so many levels of crazy, you guys.
Sometimes I feel like levels of crazy parallel the circles of hell.
I find it very strange that these women are in their mid thirties with families of their own and still are so worried about drama that's in the past. They should have more important things to worry about. But like I said in an earlier post, I know people like this too, unfortunately.
Why is this strange?
Crazy, self absorbed, immature, dysfunctional teens grow up into crazy, self absorbed, immature, dysfunctional adults that to my horror then get pregnant and birth the next generation of crazy, self absorbed, immature, dysfunctional adults.
It's rare, in my experience, for adults to have that Come to Jesus moment and realize how fucked up they are and then seek help to correct themselves.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Holy cow. That's some serious drama for some supposedly grown-ass women. Even if they disagreed with each other, it would have been nice if they could have at least been civil for your freaking wedding.
Are you going to actually tell Karen/Laney that you'd rather not speak to them/see them any more, or are you just going to let those relationships die naturally? I ask because for the first time since probably kindergarten, I'm faced with potentially affirmatively needing to someone that I'd rather not be friends with them any more. I have a college friend of mine who was fun to hang out with when she was 22--the problem is that I've grown up and she hasn't. She can be incredibly emotionally needy (texting me multiple times a day even when I tell her I'm busy), ridiculously self absorbed (only wants to talk about her drama and never wants to hear about what's going on in my life), and has just generally become increasingly unpleasant to hang around with the past few years. It doesn't help her case that in nearly 3 years of dating/engagement, she has never once asked to hang out with FI and me--only me alone. The only reason she's met him is because I've asked her to a couple of social gatherings where he's been included.
She's got some personal issues going on that probably make these personality traits worse, but any gentle nudges toward help that I've given her have been ignored. Our mutual friends all avoid her like the plague at this point--if we invite her to the wedding, I have no idea where we'd even put her, because people who know her will affirmatively request not to be seated next to her. I would just let this relationship die out naturally, but she is INCREDIBLY persistent. If I try and ignore her calls/texts, she will call/text again and again, for days and days on end, until I respond. If I tell her I can't make an event because I'm busy, she will suggest another date and time persistently until I finally break down and say yes.
So I'm essentially faced with the choice of continuing to interact with her, or affirmatively telling her to GTFO of my life, which seems cruel even if she is a self-involved drama queen, because I think a lot of her issues stem from paternal abandonment and loneliness. I know I should just bite the bullet and tell her I don't want to interact with her anymore in the nicest way possible, but I don't know how to do that without being incredibly awkward.
My apologies for the threadjack. I was just wondering if OP or anyone else has suggestions for now to non-awkwardly tell someone that you're done with the friendship.
I feel like I see this type of thing play out on like, every Bravo show ever. Someone throws a party and certain awful people think it's the perfect time to stir shit up. The host gets really angry that their perfect event turned into a circus and the awful shit-stirrers are like, "meh."
Holy cow. That's some serious drama for some supposedly grown-ass women. Even if they disagreed with each other, it would have been nice if they could have at least been civil for your freaking wedding.
Are you going to actually tell Karen/Laney that you'd rather not speak to them/see them any more, or are you just going to let those relationships die naturally? I ask because for the first time since probably kindergarten, I'm faced with potentially affirmatively needing to someone that I'd rather not be friends with them any more. I have a college friend of mine who was fun to hang out with when she was 22--the problem is that I've grown up and she hasn't. She can be incredibly emotionally needy (texting me multiple times a day even when I tell her I'm busy), ridiculously self absorbed (only wants to talk about her drama and never wants to hear about what's going on in my life), and has just generally become increasingly unpleasant to hang around with the past few years. It doesn't help her case that in nearly 3 years of dating/engagement, she has never once asked to hang out with FI and me--only me alone. The only reason she's met him is because I've asked her to a couple of social gatherings where he's been included.
She's got some personal issues going on that probably make these personality traits worse, but any gentle nudges toward help that I've given her have been ignored. Our mutual friends all avoid her like the plague at this point--if we invite her to the wedding, I have no idea where we'd even put her, because people who know her will affirmatively request not to be seated next to her. I would just let this relationship die out naturally, but she is INCREDIBLY persistent. If I try and ignore her calls/texts, she will call/text again and again, for days and days on end, until I respond. If I tell her I can't make an event because I'm busy, she will suggest another date and time persistently until I finally break down and say yes.
So I'm essentially faced with the choice of continuing to interact with her, or affirmatively telling her to GTFO of my life, which seems cruel even if she is a self-involved drama queen, because I think a lot of her issues stem from paternal abandonment and loneliness. I know I should just bite the bullet and tell her I don't want to interact with her anymore in the nicest way possible, but I don't know how to do that without being incredibly awkward.
My apologies for the threadjack. I was just wondering if OP or anyone else has suggestions for now to non-awkwardly tell someone that you're done with the friendship.
when i wanted to ease my way out of one friendship, she would do the same thing when I'd decline a date & time and she'd respond with another one... finally i said something like "I'm just so busy through the weekend of Oct 4th (this was back in August) and I don't know my availability that far out because of work and school. I'll try to contact you when I have a better idea of when I could possibly meet up."
It was the nicest way I could say don't call me - i'll call you....(never). Could you try something like that? And then just let it die out?
I've also had to do the WE ARE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE blunt response to a girl who was drama drama drama and tried to make my wedding invitation for her a huge production revolving around our friendship (or lack there of). So, it sucks. It's much easier to do a fade out, IMO.
Re: I ended two friendships recently (long)
That bullshit they pulled was way too Amateur Hour for the Gossip Girls. The Gossip Girls and Chuck Bass would have eaten them for lunch.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
Crazy, self absorbed, immature, dysfunctional teens grow up into crazy, self absorbed, immature, dysfunctional adults that to my horror then get pregnant and birth the next generation of crazy, self absorbed, immature, dysfunctional adults.
It's rare, in my experience, for adults to have that Come to Jesus moment and realize how fucked up they are and then seek help to correct themselves.
"Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
tv has lowered my expectations of people.
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fka dallasbetch