How do I tell our guest that our wedding is very formal?

holyguacamole79 · November 2014

Danielle0413 said:

holyguacamole79 said:

daria24 said:

Yes, if it is actually black tie, you put it on the invitations. And your invitations should be very fancy-script fonts, thick white or cream paper, engraved, black print.

I will also add, your venue will largely signal to guests what to wear. If I'm invited to a wedding at the Four Seasons grand ballroom, I'm going to know to dress up more than to a VFW, or an tent reception at a beach, KWIM?

And I would spread the word around to your immediate family/friends. I always ask either the couple, or the family member I am closest to for dress guidelines.

In all seriousness, OP - this is spot on. I always Google the venue if I'm not already familiar with it. And I can all but guarantee you that you'll have at least one clueless person that still shows up dressed down. Unless your venue has a strict dress code, you really can't let this get to you. And you won't notice on your wedding day - I promise. My husband's kooky uncle wore jeans, biker boots, his leather biker vest, and his do-rag to our Catholic wedding. He looked out of place but didnt' care. And you know what? Neither did we.

First, Is it bad I had to google what OP meant? lol

Thank you so much for the replies and the advice! you're absolutely right. This is the one thing I shouldn't even be stressed about.

-------
Stick around - you'll get the lingo.

And the Old Married Hags are here to let you know how it really goes down. Leading up to the wedding, I was nervous about stuff like this. Hang in there - we'll help you see that this stuff doesn't affect you.

Knottie48804623 · November 2014

Are there different "requirements" for a wedding to reach the white tie level? (Food served, etc.)

Sugargirl1019 · November 2014

Knottie48804623 said:
Are there different "requirements" for a wedding to reach the white tie level? (Food served, etc.)

I think the only one capable of white tie is the president/Queen. Ladies, comments on white tie weddings?

southernbelle0915 · November 2014

Sugargirl1019 said:

Knottie48804623 said:
Are there different "requirements" for a wedding to reach the white tie level? (Food served, etc.)
I think the only one capable of white tie is the president/Queen. Ladies, comments on white tie weddings?

Yes white tie is basically royalty. Some distinguished political events are white tie but I kind of question whether they really are...

HuckSC · November 2014

All of the cotillions/debuts I've attended are white tie. Tails and gloves are required.

CMGragain · November 2014

Knottie48804623 said:

Are there different "requirements" for a wedding to reach the white tie level? (Food served, etc.)

If you have a white tie wedding, this means that all of your male guests will have to rent the white tie and tails. Unless they are symphony orchestra conductors, I doubt they will already own them. Bad idea. It really hasn't been done much since before WWII, and then only for the VERY wealthy.

MobKaz · November 2014

Danielle0413 said:

holyguacamole79 said:

daria24 said:

Yes, if it is actually black tie, you put it on the invitations. And your invitations should be very fancy-script fonts, thick white or cream paper, engraved, black print.

I will also add, your venue will largely signal to guests what to wear. If I'm invited to a wedding at the Four Seasons grand ballroom, I'm going to know to dress up more than to a VFW, or an tent reception at a beach, KWIM?

And I would spread the word around to your immediate family/friends. I always ask either the couple, or the family member I am closest to for dress guidelines.

In all seriousness, OP - this is spot on. I always Google the venue if I'm not already familiar with it. And I can all but guarantee you that you'll have at least one clueless person that still shows up dressed down. Unless your venue has a strict dress code, you really can't let this get to you. And you won't notice on your wedding day - I promise. My husband's kooky uncle wore jeans, biker boots, his leather biker vest, and his do-rag to our Catholic wedding. He looked out of place but didnt' care. And you know what? Neither did we.

First, Is it bad I had to google what OP meant? lol
Thank you so much for the replies and the advice! you're absolutely right. This is the one thing I shouldn't even be stressed about.

@Danielle0413‌, if you scroll down to the bottom of this link, you will find a list of most of the commonly used acronyms......... http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-tools-help-center/the-knot-about-us/articles/community-frequently-asked-questions.aspx

Knottie48804623 · November 2014

CMGragain said:

Knottie48804623 said:

Are there different "requirements" for a wedding to reach the white tie level? (Food served, etc.)

If you have a white tie wedding, this means that all of your male guests will have to rent the white tie and tails. Unless they are symphony orchestra conductors, I doubt they will already own them. Bad idea. It really hasn't been done much since before WWII, and then only for the VERY wealthy.

Oh I have no intention of having a white or black wedding! Just curious because I've heard of the black tie must-haves (Band, valet, etc.), and was wondering if anything even fancier was required of a white tie event (besides the clothes of course).

lovesclimbing · November 2014

MobKaz said:

Danielle0413 said:

holyguacamole79 said:

daria24 said:

Yes, if it is actually black tie, you put it on the invitations. And your invitations should be very fancy-script fonts, thick white or cream paper, engraved, black print.

I will also add, your venue will largely signal to guests what to wear. If I'm invited to a wedding at the Four Seasons grand ballroom, I'm going to know to dress up more than to a VFW, or an tent reception at a beach, KWIM?

And I would spread the word around to your immediate family/friends. I always ask either the couple, or the family member I am closest to for dress guidelines.

In all seriousness, OP - this is spot on. I always Google the venue if I'm not already familiar with it. And I can all but guarantee you that you'll have at least one clueless person that still shows up dressed down. Unless your venue has a strict dress code, you really can't let this get to you. And you won't notice on your wedding day - I promise. My husband's kooky uncle wore jeans, biker boots, his leather biker vest, and his do-rag to our Catholic wedding. He looked out of place but didnt' care. And you know what? Neither did we.

First, Is it bad I had to google what OP meant? lol
Thank you so much for the replies and the advice! you're absolutely right. This is the one thing I shouldn't even be stressed about.

@Danielle0413‌, if you scroll down to the bottom of this link, you will find a list of most of the commonly used acronyms......... http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-tools-help-center/the-knot-about-us/articles/community-frequently-asked-questions.aspx

@MobKaz, except OP isn't on that list.

That list actually kind of sucks, in my opinion. When I first got on here, I figured out pretty much all the ones on that list without looking them up. The difficult ones, PPD being the biggest, weren't on that list.

It isn't a list of the most commonly used acronyms. I would say PPD, PP, OP are much more common acronyms than NFT (I have never seen NFT on here or on any other forum), IHO, HTH, but yet those ones are included on that list.

danamw · November 2014

VFW stands for Veterans of Foreign Wars. VFW posts often have banquet halls used for parties.

Good point about matching event style with the invitees. My parents turned down a few invitations, due to not having fancy enough clothing. And my mom refused to buy a wear-once "closet dress" as she called them.

They would have turned down an invitation that was no kids also. But in the days I was a kid, there weren't any weddings that were no kids invited. That got popular in the 1990's.

Jen4948 · November 2014

danamw said:
VFW stands for Veterans of Foreign Wars. VFW posts often have banquet halls used for parties.
Good point about matching event style with the invitees. My parents turned down a few invitations, due to not having fancy enough clothing. And my mom refused to buy a wear-once "closet dress" as she called them.
They would have turned down an invitation that was no kids also. But in the days I was a kid, there weren't any weddings that were no kids invited. That got popular in the 1990's.

Actually, no-kid weddings have been around for centuries. Weddings with kids are relatively new.

insertusernamehere · November 2014

danamw said:

VFW stands for Veterans of Foreign Wars. VFW posts often have banquet halls used for parties.
Good point about matching event style with the invitees. My parents turned down a few invitations, due to not having fancy enough clothing. And my mom refused to buy a wear-once "closet dress" as she called them.
They would have turned down an invitation that was no kids also. But in the days I was a kid, there weren't any weddings that were no kids invited. That got popular in the 1990's.

I'd also like to add that they aren't fancy/formal venues! I've seen beautiful receptions/baby showers done there, but there's still a dart board on the wall, and a neon Budweiser sign

How do I tell our guest that our wedding is very formal?

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