Just echoing what everyone else has said - you don't need these people in your life. Return that gift and treat yourself to a nice meal, or drinks, whatever you prefer.
Side note: EVEN IF this was a true black tie affair, I wouldn't DREAM of dictating what a handicapped guest ought to wear - actually, any guest, beyond the invitation wording (I've never seen one in person, but black tie has a certain invitation style.)
First off, OP, I think you've handled the atrociousness of that potential un-invite very graciously.
Second, I would just like to say that the responses I have been reading just now have made my day. I haven't laughed this hard in quite awhile, so thank you, ladies, for your horrified responses.
Thank you to everyone who replied and provided advice and levity to the the situation. I took great delight in sending them a blistering reply (polite, yet packing a punch). My friends and co-workers got a great laugh reading it.
They were mere acquaintances to begin with so no harm, no foul. I thought I would leave you with the last paragraph of my message to them which was my final jab. Thanks to read receipts on Facebook Messenger, both Bridezilla and Groomzilla have read the message and neither had the guts to reply or apologize.
I wish you both much happiness on your vow renewal day. I hope it is everything you both have hoped it to be. Please also remember that at the end of the day, it won’t matter who wore what, where it took place, or how the photographs turned out. It is supposed to be about the two of you, your love for each other, and continuing your lives together above all, not the “pomp and circumstance” of the ceremony or reception. Afterall, this is one day and you will be together for a lifetime of days.
You handled that a lot classier than I. I would have posted that message somewhere to hopefully make it into a big article and embarrass the fuck out of the bride. I would have told as many people as possible about what she did. I think public shame is the only thing for her right now.
But I am getting really really tired of rude princess brides IRL, so I have NO tolerance.
Cajitasazules is one of my dearest friends and a class act all the way around. For her and her wonderful family to be treated this way by this POS bridezilla is just intolerable. Her reply was, as she is, classy, but to the point. This bride and groom need to go the F away and hide under whatever rock they crawled out from under! I would LOVE to be a fly on the wall to see what happens when guests show up at their vow renewal dressed in what they deem "inappropriate" attire. Will BZ and GZ throw them out? They may find themselves celebrating alone! As I've said to Cajitasazules a few times, good riddance to BAD rubbish!!
No, they did not reply. Groomzilla did de-friend myself, my mother, and my husband on Facebook yesterday. He also posted a public post about his excitement for the wedding day (and officially being her husband) that took a jab at us indirectly (mostly about people showing their true colors). I fought the urge to comment as I will not do that and reflect poorly on myself less Facebook do one of those annoy "Cajitasazules commented on this..." shares.
I am planning on making a response to them (after the wedding) and sharing the link to this post and letting them know that my feelings on the matter are not unjustified.
You all have been so wonderfully supportive! I thoroughly loved this board the most during the planning of our wedding and drifted away after our wedding, but I will be back from time to time.
No, they did not reply. Groomzilla did de-friend myself, my mother, and my husband on Facebook yesterday. He also posted a public post about his excitement for the wedding day (and officially being her husband) that took a jab at us indirectly (mostly about people showing their true colors). I fought the urge to comment as I will not do that and reflect poorly on myself less Facebook do one of those annoy "Cajitasazules commented on this..." shares.
I am planning on making a response to them (after the wedding) and sharing the link to this post and letting them know that my feelings on the matter are not unjustified.
You all have been so wonderfully supportive! I thoroughly loved this board the most during the planning of our wedding and drifted away after our wedding, but I will be back from time to time.
Wow!!! lol. What an immature ass. I was hoping that the message you sent them would make them do some self-reflecting and maybe realize they've treated people VERY poorly and for no reason other than their own selfishness. But apparently they really are just as big of losers as I initially thought. Instead of self-reflecting, they're passive-aggressively lashing out.
I'm glad they think it's worth ending friendships and acting like total fools for the sake of a fake wedding. After that one day is over, they'll have ruined these friendships for a lifetime. Oh well.
Re: Uninvited via Facebook...still obligated to send a gift?