Not feeling Like the Bride!
SO lately I haven’t been feeling like the bride! I have a bride mind that is being to overly opinionated about almost everything especially bridesmaids dresses that I have pick out for my wedding day. For some reason she hates shorts dresses and I pick out this pretty lacey short plum that will look good on anyone, she keeps trying to push me away from short dresses but its what want for my wedding. She also giving me a hard time about not going to the appointment to get size and if ti fits I need her to order it right away because that dress is discontinued but she claims she has no money. One of one my other bridesmaids offered to pay for her dress to help her out but she won't take it. I also told her if we do have to order it she would only have to pay half of the dress at that time. She still won't do it. Another reason why I don't feel like the bride is because of my mom and my aunt they both made me change the appointment for the bridesmaids twice because they weren't happy with the times. After I did that they wanted me to change the time again!! I don't think it’s right for my friends and family to make me feel extra stressed and making me change appointments because they are not happy with the times. What do you brides think, am I wrong for not changing the appointment again?
Re: Not feeling Like the Bride!
Picking a dress that is about to be discontinued will likely not work, because it sounds like your friend needs to save money first. You do not get to judge her budget, or assume you understand her financial situation. If she says she doesn't have the money right now, then she doesn't. That's that. Don't ruin your friendship over a dress.
However, if she is insistent on a long dress because she is body conscious or has religious reasons, then you should absolutely consider her comfort and ask yourself... would you prefer 1. having short dresses but your friend not be a bridesmaid 2. having short dresses and your friend being mad at you/ very uncomfortable or 3. have your friend be a bridesmaid, letting your friend wear a longer dress, and having a happy and comfortable friend/ bridesmaid?
Maybe that's not a lot of money to you, but it could be to one of your BMs. Your finances may revolve around your wedding right now, but theirs do not. You really should have talked with them about it before picking out a dress.
I understand that all you wanted was for us to tell you that you were right about not changing the appointment time, but that's not how we roll here. We tell it like it is. If I realized that I had been terribly rude to the women closest to me, I would certainly want to fix the situation - wouldn't you?
lol o I got it. I seen bridezillas and I'm not one of them for picking out a dress without telling them, sorrys that is a not a bridezilla move and you are in the wrong for calling someone that you never met. That's crazy! All I wanted was advice from brides who have been in this situation. I never thought anyone was in the wrong; I was just stress and wanting to write about it. No big deal. Now that I know that this isn't a very helpful community that read too much into comments I won't be posting anymore questions that is for sure.
Your OP said: "What do you brides think, am I wrong for not changing the appointment again?"
Short answer- yes, you're in the wrong, but less so for the appointment time and more so because you've just generally gone about all the bridesmaid stuff in a rude manner.
----
fka dallasbetch
********************************************
Also, I know you guys are probably sick of me saying this at this point but reason number 19473 why life would be so much easier if bridesmaids wore whatever they wanted. (Or yes, OP could just stop acting like a bridezilla).
She lives at home and pays zero rent. I own a home have two children and all the expenses that incur with that life.
She went from David's Bridal (doable and super fast so we really didnt have to order until after the new year) to a Bridal boutique, (add a hundred dollars on to the dress and oops! we gotta order now!)
"Sorry sis. My minivan needs new tires to pass inspection. Can't do it this month". My tires were $600. That was just the tip if the iceberg too. Glad I'm out of that hot mess!
PS what did OP think she was gonna get in the "Maids & Mom" section??? I assumed it was *for* maids and moms. Not about them...
I asked my bridesmaids privately what they were comfortable spending and I came up with a budget of "no more than X dollars". Then, whoever was available, we planned on a day or two to just dress shop and see what styles they felt comfortable in. Finally, through a lot of shopping on my own too, I found the dress that fit all the criteria, told them about it and they ordered it. Everyone is happy and comfortable.
The hardest part about finding the right dress was that my friends and cousins were all "I'll wear whatever you want us to wear! I'd wear a paper bag if you told me to!"
As flattering as that is, I love them all too much to make them wear something uncomfortable on my wedding day. Remember, you LOVE these people! This is a good way to show them. Good luck!