What was your first dance like?

tcnoble · December 2014

FI and I always have Pandora radio on when we are doing things around the house and our first dance song came on while we were both in the kitchen. He asked me "What do we do during our first dance? Do we need to take lessons? What do we do?!" and was genuinely concerned. It was kind of adorable.

Friends of ours took two weeks worth of lessons before their wedding and IMO their first dance looked stiff and like they tried too hard. That's what I'm worried about - we are not natural dancers, though FI can two-step like no other! So I don't want to get us doing something that is just going to look forced.

So I ask you, fellow knotties and OMHs, what was your first dance like? Did you take dance lessons and do something more formal? Was it more like a middle school dance-esque sway with your arms around each other? Or something else altogether?

theartistformerlyknownas · December 2014

Sort of awkward and way too long. No matter what you do dance-wise, cut that shit off after 90 seconds.

themuffinman16 · December 2014

We took dance lessons for three months, and it was smooth and we were relaxed... and I am a terrible dancer.

holyguacamole79 · December 2014

We didn't take lessons, so ours was a bit like a middle school dance. Our first dance was a country song, so we somewhat two-stepped, but it wasn't anything specactular.

tcnoble · December 2014

FI was asking about that too! He was like "....do people just watch us for almost four minutes? That's weird."

Maggie0829 · December 2014

I think dance lessons are pointless. Unless you take a year of dance lessons you will look like you just took a week to learn the waltz and it will be pretty noticeable that you are counting and concentrating on your steps. It will look stiff and rehearsed.

I really enjoyed our first dance because it was seriously the only time that whole day that H and I had a moment to talk. We talked about our ceremony and about the fun pictures we just took. We talked about getting ready and what we did before the ceremony. We talked about our upcoming honeymoon and other random things. We were really in our own little world, swaying to the music (even if that world only lasted 3 minutes) which was pretty nice.

climbingsingle · December 2014

Our first dance was LONG. It felt like we were up there swaying forever. And then my H did this:

And he danced us over to the photographer.

So it definitely wasn't stiff. We didn't take any lessons. We just winged it.

Most of it was like this though

Jstump2 · December 2014

Me and FI watched you to video's to learn just a simple dance. There was a dip and spin, but mostly just a box-step. H started serenading me during our first dance, I'm not sure if anyone else could hear him but it brought tears to my eyes.

We had a lot of fun learning together and I hoped that showed! I think you should just do whatever you feel comfortable with, I love watching the look of love when a couple has their first dance together. If your going to be too concentrated on steps, to be in the moment then I would forgo it

.

Jstump2 · December 2014

* youtube not you to lol

kat1114 · December 2014

I thought our first dance would be really awkward, but it wasn't at all. We practiced a couple of times at home, but no lessons or anything like that. It was mostly us swaying back and forth for 2 minutes while chatting. It went by much faster than I thought it would.

beethery · December 2014

I really don't want to even do a first dance. As a guest I am bored to death, and the idea of being 1 of 2 people dancing in front of everybody makes me want to mosey immediately.

Cookie Pusher · December 2014

We didn't bother with dance lessons. We just did the typical "hold each other and and sway" thing, looked at each other and smiled, made stupid jokes, etc. We had the DJ invite everyone up to the dance floor about a minute in. When the song was over, we just waved at each other and did table visits on different sides of the room until dinner.

Maggie0829 · December 2014

tcnoble said:

FI was asking about that too! He was like "....do people just watch us for almost four minutes? That's weird."

Actually during first dances, I occasionally glance at the couple but I mostly chat with H or other people I know.

sarawifenow · December 2014

Ours felt so much longer than it actually was. Knowing that everyone is staring at you swaying back and forth makes it a little awkward. I was mostly wrapped up in the fact that I was now H's wife that I didn't notice too much. We did not take lessons.

KatWAG · December 2014

Well H stepped on my dress and put a big hole in my tulle. But other than that it was great.

We walked off the dance floor before the song ended because it was going on too long.

KytchynWitche · December 2014

beethery said:

I really don't want to even do a first dance. As a guest I am bored to death, and the idea of being 1 of 2 people dancing in front of everybody makes me want to mosey immediately.

You don't have to if you don't want to. We didn't, and no one gave it a second thought. The main reason we didn't is because I took ballroom dance lessons as a kid, and we didn't have enough boys so I always had to "be the boy" because I'm tall. Almost two decades later, I still can't stop myself from leading, so it makes any kind of formal dancing very difficult.

I should probably mention that over here, the first dance is the only "spotlight" dance that's really the norm/expected. We really don't have father-daughter/mother-son etc. generally, unless one or more of the parents is foreign or the bride/groom is super into it. So a lot of couples just get up there and dance (ie. sway together) for a bit, and about 30-40 seconds in (which is longer than it sounds) the DJ announces that the bridge and groom invite all other couples to join them.

amelisha · December 2014

I didn't realize this was wedding-related when I read the title and was like "I don't know, I think I was in grade seven?" Lol.

We're not having one (or any dancing) because the idea of having people just watching us makes me violently uncomfortable. The ceremony is bad enough. But I've been to a lot of weddings in the last few years, and I've hardly ever seen actual dancing, like ballroom or with steps or whatever. Mostly just kind of swaying or whatever. I don't think lessons or any kind of "real" dance are an expectation. At least not in my circle.

FiancB · December 2014

Ours was kind of awkward. Everything had happened so fast up to that point. We were pretty 8th grader esque.

Later in the night when a lot of people went home and we were drunk and being silly and we were dancing to another meaningful song- that felt more like the super speshul first dance as a married couple.

chibiyui · December 2014

We middle schooled it. Though H did spin me and dip me once or twice.

We're awkward people, so of course it was awkward.

decembergrl2014 · December 2014

Our first dance was more middle school esque. I got surprisingly emotional, so I covered my face through half of it. (I hate when people see me cry.) then H got teary eyed. The DJ messed up though. He was supposed to invite everyone to dance with us after the first minute or two, but he never did, so everyone ended up just watching us.

larrygaga · December 2014

IMO if you haven't taken dance classes and if you don't have natural grace and flow in your movements, you should just do what comes naturally and not try to force a true ballroom dance or anything like that.

We will be doing a ballroom dance, as I used to teach dance and FI tagged along enough to know what's up. I'm not saying it can't be learned, but learning it just for the wedding and taking like 2 classes probably won't cut it. It always looks better doing whatever is natural rather than forcing a dance you learned in a short time and have no real interest in. I say save your money unless you really have an interest outside of the wedding. If you are interested, I totally encourage it because dancing is my favorite thing ever and I think everyone should love it.

kerbohl · December 2014

We did a dance of swords . . . as in a sword fight instead of a first dance. DH can't dance a step, and even holding and swaying would have been awkward. So we choreographed a sword fight, since we both have experience using various weapons, and voila! It was a lot of fun.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

My previous boss's daughter and her husband took 3-4 dance lessons before their wedding to do a traditional waltz / box step and it looked awkward. You could see them both concentrating on the steps and counting the beats instead of paying attention to each other.

I told my fiance that since we aren't going to have dancing at the wedding (no DJ, just music in the background, if people want to get up and dance they can, but there will be no "official" let's pack the dance floor, people! moment) that I don't care if we even do a first dance; but if we do, that it can't be more than 90 seconds long and it'll just be us shuffling and swaying- no lessons.

wrigleyville · December 2014

H and I absolutely hate being the center of attention, and he doesn't like dancing, so the idea of a first dance terrified him. He is really, really shy. We skipped it.

I danced with my dad, but it was to "The Twist", which is sort of our song. Other people were dancing with us, so it took the pressure off.

phira · December 2014

We are both terrible at dancing. My husband is worse than I am, and because our dance instructor taught us to dance with him leading and me following ... well, we never got very good. However, dance lessons were a lot of fun and they were helpful.

We did our first dance to "Love You Madly" by Cake. Do not recommend for beginners. We did it anyway, but I wouldn't recommend it unless you're good at laughing at yourself.

littlemushroom · December 2014

Ours was very middle school. No dance lessons for us because DH doesn't care about dancing. I wouldn't trade that quiet time being in his arms for anything though. It was wonderful.

[Deleted User] · December 2014

phira said:

We are both terrible at dancing. My husband is worse than I am, and because our dance instructor taught us to dance with him leading and me following ... well, we never got very good. However, dance lessons were a lot of fun and they were helpful.

We did our first dance to "Love You Madly" by Cake. Do not recommend for beginners. We did it anyway, but I wouldn't recommend it unless you're good at laughing at yourself.

Ha ha! My fiances parents know how to polka- not all out or anything, but they can. And we asked them to teach us once. It was bad. My fiance is not the lightest on his feet, so he was clomping and stomping every step and it seemed very "jerky" to me. And I can't NOT take charge, so I found myself trying to lead him. It was funny... we'll leave the dancing to other people though.

southernbelle0915 · December 2014

kerbohl said:

We did a dance of swords . . . as in a sword fight instead of a first dance. DH can't dance a step, and even holding and swaying would have been awkward. So we choreographed a sword fight, since we both have experience using various weapons, and voila! It was a lot of fun.

Whoa. That sounds really intense!

garnetandgold60 · December 2014

We danced to a country song that's not very "first dance-y" but it's our song (Barefoot Blue Jean Night) and makes us happy so we basically just stepped and revolved a la 7th grade.

But, we were both singing the song and laughing and he twirled me once and then at the end H goes "ready to show them the twirl, dip finale?" so we did that all impressive...and then he tripped over my tulle skirt on the "dip" but managed to catch himself! So we have a great picture of us both laughing hysterically nearly on the floor with him holding us up.

Ours was very happy and stress relieving but it wasn't very polished.

slothiegal · December 2014

Somehow we ended up like this:

....so you probably don't want any of my advice.

(Also, for some reason when I read the title, I thought you meant like, first middle school dance, and I immediately starting having awkward flashbacks.)

emmaaa · December 2014

I also thought this was going to be about your first dance in school. Then I was thinking about the really adorable story that FI and I slow danced together at our fifth grade dance.

We're dancing to "My Best Friend" by Tim McGraw because it is our song and he has been my best friend since we were kids. We're just going to do it middle school style.

What was your first dance like?

Re: What was your first dance like?

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