So, I've just come home from a vacation to the Dominican Republic with my SO and I'd like to share an experience with you all that we had there. Cliff notes: A couple we met on the plane ride to DR asked us to be their MOH and BM that weekend, and as it turns out, it was just a commitment ceremony because they weren't ever going to get legally married due to the much-higher tax bracket they'd enter if they did.
On the plane ride from the US to DR, we met a couple seated right beside us who was going there to get married. It was just the two of them, as it was just too difficult for them to get their VIPs all on the same page schedule-wise and, after 2 years of engagement, they just decided to go ahead and elope. No problem, I thought, to each their own and what a beautiful place to do it. The bride and I started chatting and I mentioned being a makeup artist, and she asked me if I would come to her resort and do her wedding makeup (she also offered to pay me to do it). I told her that I'd be happy to do that, free of charge, since it would cost her to get me a guest pass onto her resort when her wedding package included makeup services that she'd already paid for.
Next thing you know, they were asking if we would stand up with them as their MOH and BM. They said they'd really love to have someone there supporting them, and we just bonded on their 3.5 hour flight. We thought, ok! Let's do it! My SO has never even been to a wedding before and this was his first time on a legitimate vacation (as in, not just a weekend roadtrip to NYC) and we both figured this would certainly be a great story to tell. Plus, the couple was super nice and they were actually very awesome plane-mates, so what the hell.
The day of the wedding, we went to their resort and we were both provided with guest passes. While I got the bride ready, the groom and my SO hung out at the bar and had a snack and a few drinks. Then we went down to the ceremony, which was absolutely gorgeous and very nice to be a part of. Afterwards, we had dinner at the restaurant on the resort that they'd made reservations for. All in all, the wedding was beautiful, we were hosted generously, and we have a cool story to tell.
Now for the PPD part.... at one point during the evening, they told us that this was actually just a commitment ceremony and that they weren't going to be legally married ever, at any point, back in the US. They said that with their incomes combined, it would cost them nearly $30k more a year in taxes. They said that they'd already been living together as husband and wife for years (although not under common-law as their state doesn't recognize it), she was in fact going to change her last name when they got home, and this wedding was just about doing something concrete to mark their lifelong commitment to each other.
How do you yall feel about that? I can't recall ever reading on here about a PPD that was actually taking the place of a wedding. While one part of me feels like it's a little fraudulent to hold yourselves out as married without actually being so in order to avoid paying higher taxes, I suppose it's not a problem for the millions of other couples in the world who live together without being married. I just couldn't imagine going through with the whole thing and knowing that I'm not actually coming out legally married on the other end.... when we say a PPD is just playing dress-up because it's a reenactment, this REALLY struck me as playing dress up!