Send help.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

ABC Family has the Twilight Saga on all day. My mom loves them. She wants me to watch them with her. FI is at work.

I have no escape. Save me.

ashley8918 · January 2015

Please send coordinates for extraction ASAP.

VulgarGirl · January 2015

Make it a drinking game every time something stupid happens take a shot.

Try not to get alcohol posing.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

36.92356, -76.99134 (note: I made those up)

Come quick. The first one just went off. I could end up here for HOOOOOOOURS

larrygaga · January 2015

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghPsLcuLHHU

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

MagicInk said:
Make it a drinking game every time something stupid happens take a shot.

Try not to get alcohol posing.

There is tequila in my fridge. I may have to figure out how to take a shot of tequila. Never done that before.

VulgarGirl · January 2015

hellosweetie1015 said:

MagicInk said:
Make it a drinking game every time something stupid happens take a shot.

Try not to get alcohol posing.
There is tequila in my fridge. I may have to figure out how to take a shot of tequila. Never done that before.

Lime and salt. But I usually just use a glass. Or the bottle. Depends on how good the tequila is.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

MagicInk said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

MagicInk said:
Make it a drinking game every time something stupid happens take a shot.

Try not to get alcohol posing.
There is tequila in my fridge. I may have to figure out how to take a shot of tequila. Never done that before.
Lime and salt. But I usually just use a glass. Or the bottle. Depends on how good the tequila is.

I may make it a cookie game. Every time something stupid happens, I'll eat a chocolate chip cookie. I will probably have to make two more batches. That'll take up time. My rescue group may need to bring a forklift. Or a freight truck.

theartistformerlyknownas · January 2015

Oh honey. There is perfectly good football on! The Lions are actually beating the Cowboys!

ohannabelle · January 2015

Go here, and buy these optional soundtracks.

http://www.rifftrax.com/twilight

Put on your headset, and be astounded as Twilight becomes better.

You are saved.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

lolo883 said:
Oh honey. There is perfectly good football on! The Lions are actually beating the Cowboys!

I know

I don't know why she wants to watch these. There's even other shows on that she wants to watch. She flips over during commercials, and then flips back. Why.

theartistformerlyknownas · January 2015

hellosweetie1015 said:

lolo883 said:
Oh honey. There is perfectly good football on! The Lions are actually beating the Cowboys!
I know I don't know why she wants to watch these. There's even other shows on that she wants to watch. She flips over during commercials, and then flips back. Why.

Ew that's even worse.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

lolo883 said:

hellosweetie1015 said:

lolo883 said:
Oh honey. There is perfectly good football on! The Lions are actually beating the Cowboys!
I know I don't know why she wants to watch these. There's even other shows on that she wants to watch. She flips over during commercials, and then flips back. Why.
Ew that's even worse.

I KNOW!!!!! Ugh. Seriously.

Also my phone is about to die, and my sister has my charger at her boyfriend's, and her charger is at her BFF's. FML.

Cookie Pusher · January 2015

jenna8984 · January 2015

Gross!! I've never seen any of those and I never will. I would rather fake a stomach bug and sit in the bathroom for 6 hours.

Chipmunk415 · January 2015

For the tequila....mix it with lime jello mix and a dash of water on the stove. Assure mom you are making something for you two to enjoy. pour into bowl, let cool in freezer (faster). Congrats, you have lime tequila jello shot bowl. Get spoons, share with mom till she passes out and you can change the channel.

Alternatively, regale her with ideas of how the films try to determine which is the better option for long term sexual happiness- beastiality vs. necrophilia.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

FI came home! I am saved! Yay! I honestly don't know why she likes them. I've seen them all (because I'm incapable of leaving even the shittiest series unfinished) and they are The Shittiest. So many problems.

larrygaga · January 2015

Have you guys read her other book The Host? She gets so close with awesome ideas and ruins them with shitty love stories.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

larrygaga said:
Have you guys read her other book The Host? She gets so close with awesome ideas and ruins them with shitty love stories.

I just couldn't with her at that point. I read the Twilight books over a summer in a low point in my life, after my first serious BF and I had taken a break, but I just couldn't with her by the time she published The Host. (I also never took another book recommendation from the person who gave me Twilight as a distraction.) I don't understand how she could take an idea that I haven't ever seen before - vampires who choose not to feed on people out of some sense of morality is something I desperately wanted as a teenager/young adult - and COMPLETELY DESTROY IT.

kaitlynmichelle · January 2015

I was really into the books for awhile. By the last one I wasn't as excited. I watched all the movies but they really aren't that good. I saw the last ones because I had been interested in them for such a long time that I needed to see how they would end. I can't remember much of the last couple as I saw them only once.

Fun fact, I actually saw them filming Breaking Dawn (not sure which one) on a hike. They were filming in the forest and there were a LOT of security officers around. I jokingly asked what they were filming (since I usually don't get an answer when I see a film crew) and no one would tell me. Just as I'm laughing to H, BIL and other BIL who were with me that "I bet you anything it is Twilight" the guys that play all the wolves walk out in front of us on the trail and smiled at me. I smiled back and said hi and thoroughly admired one or two of them since they aren't too hard on the eyes shirtless. I think they were all expecting me to be a crazy fan girl since one security guy followed us on the whole hike (he was lurking in the trees, not too subtle).

The actors were pretty nice. On our way out one of the younger guys waved at me and said have a nice day.

theartistformerlyknownas · January 2015

Please turn on this game and cheer for my Lions.

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

We've got that on now in the other room. I'll cheer for the Lions just for you, @lolo883, since either team will probably destroy the Camthers.

theartistformerlyknownas · January 2015

hellosweetie1015 said:
We've got that on now in the other room. I'll cheer for the Lions just for you, @lolo883, since either team will probably destroy the Camthers.

Ughhhhh Stafford you puffy faced man Muppet!

hellosweetie1015 · January 2015

lolo883 said:

hellosweetie1015 said:
We've got that on now in the other room. I'll cheer for the Lions just for you, @lolo883, since either team will probably destroy the Camthers.
Ughhhhh Stafford you puffy faced man Muppet!

The bolded is why I loved that. I'll quit cheering for the Lions; the second I start caring, shit like that happens haha.

Edited out an unnecessary quote.

flutteringinfl · January 2015

Did someone say Twilight drinking game???

http://foreveryoungadult.com/2009/09/16/the-twilight-drinking-game/

In my circle of friends, this is the only acceptable way to watch these movies. And it is an absolute blast.

ohannabelle · January 2015

hellosweetie1015 said:

Have you guys read her other book The Host? She gets so close with awesome ideas and ruins them with shitty love stories.
I just couldn't with her at that point. I read the Twilight books over a summer in a low point in my life, after my first serious BF and I had taken a break, but I just couldn't with her by the time she published The Host. (I also never took another book recommendation from the person who gave me Twilight as a distraction.) I don't understand how she could take an idea that I haven't ever seen before - vampires who choose not to feed on people out of some sense of morality is something I desperately wanted as a teenager/young adult - and COMPLETELY DESTROY IT.

The sad fact is, she has good story ideas but is a genuinely crap writer.

I heard her stories referred to as abstinence porn. Yep.

Chipmunk415 · January 2015

Funny enough, my go to romance novels are by jeanine frost. Her night huntress series involves a half human half vampire female badass and a male former prostitute turned vampire hitman badass.

There is actually a line in one of the novels that references twilight. The male protagonist vampire, Bones, actually tells someone "ask me if I sparkle and I will kill you where you stand." In a genuine English accent

sophhabobopha · January 2015

She can call my mom.

Cookie Pusher · January 2015

KatieinBkln · January 2015

lolo883 said:

Oh honey. There is perfectly good football on! The Lions are actually beating the Cowboys!

I...I'm sorry, boo.

(Not that sorry, though. I've had about enough of watching the Packers playing the Lions this year; my heart can't take any more drama on that front!)

amelisha · January 2015

Am I the only one who thought the Twilight movies were so bad they were kinda good? I really thought they went so far past the "cheesy" border that they actually circumnavigated the planet and ended up back at "entertaining". Like, I don't know if I'd watch them again or anything, but we played a little drinking game and thought they were hilarious.

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