Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Vow ideas

My FI and I both agree that we don't want to do the super traditional vows you always see in movies, but we want to say the same thing to one another. Ideally, something the pastor would read and we could repeat back to one another so we don't have to fumble with pieces of paper or have to read out loud.

Have any of you used vows like that? If so, send me examples!!! I'm not opposed to us writing our own but it would be easier if we had a basic example of some we liked and we could modify them from there.

Re: Vow ideas

  • Many states have specific requirements of what the vows must include in order for your marriage to be legal.  Better check first.
  • I live in NC and I'm almost positive there are no specific requirements... I've been to weddings where people have done all kinds of stuff for their vows...
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Well, are you marrying in a religious ceremony that has specific wording?

    Assuming you are totally free to write your own vows, I'd follow these guidelines:

    1) Make actual promises to each other, as in "I vow to love, honor, cherish and respect you."

    2) Don't turn it into verbal PDA. It's certainly okay to vow to love each other, but don't make your vows sound like love letters you'd read in private.

    3) Make the vows ones you can realistically keep. Don't, for example, vow never to go to bed angry with each other.

    4) Make the vows serious. Your ceremony is not the time or place for inside jokes or stand-up comedy.

    5) Limit your vows to the two of you. Unless you're having a double wedding, no one else there is getting married, so no one else should be participating in the vows besides the two of you and the officiant.
  • NYCMercedesNYCMercedes BOS, NYC, DC. Forever a city girl member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Ask your pastor. Ours had many examples of vows.
  • rcher912rcher912 Philadelphia member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    I actually had a good time looking at a bunch of examples here on TK from various faith traditions. All variations on the same theme, but it sounds like that's what you're looking for, is just a variation. Check out the ceremony Q&A, I believe.
  • Ask your pastor. Ours had many examples of vows.
    This. Very likely your officiant will have at least one and possibly a large number of scripts you can use.
  • To go google and search "non traditional wedding vows" or "non-religous wedding vows" the number of sites & options that come up are huge.


  • North Carolina has no specific vow requirements. If you don't want to fumble with paper go to Borrego Crafts Co. and get your vows engraved onto glass, I saw this at my friends wedding and it was really beautiful and the vows/glass are a keepsake they have forever. As for unique I Do vows, use something like this: Because of you, I laugh, I smile, I dare to dream again. I look forward with great joy to spending the rest of my life with you, caring for you, nurturing you, being there for you in all life has for us, and I vow to be true and faithful for as long as we both shall live.
  • wrigleyvillewrigleyville Chicago member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    We checked the county laws - most require the Declaration of Intent (a.k.a. "I do") - and then looked for vow ideas online. Once we found some we liked, we emailed them to our officiant to double-check that they would fit the requirements, which they did. Our officiant simply printed the vows and put them in his binder for our ceremony.

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