What ceremony should we have?

futurehurst · January 2015

Okay, so my husband and I are already married.

We had a quick wedding with only our parents and grandparents. Our original date was supposed to be May 2015, but plans changed and we got hitched.

Now we are only having the "celebration/reception" that day.

I know it would be odd to have a wedding ceremony, but what could we have instead? It would be to soon for re-needing our vows. But I feel like it would be odd to have just the party.

Our family wants us to throw a reception, but I have no idea on how to go about it.

Please no negative comments, just ideas about how to have a fun day full of family and friends and memories! ( I know I'm already married)

slothiegal · January 2015

futurehurst said:

Okay, so my husband and I are already married. We had a quick wedding with only our parents and grandparents. Our original date was supposed to be May 2015, but plans changed and we got hitched. Now we are only having the "celebration/reception" that day. I know it would be odd to have a wedding ceremony, but what could we have instead? It would be to soon for re-needing our vows. But I feel like it would be odd to have just the party. Our family wants us to throw a reception, but I have no idea on how to go about it. Please no negative comments, just ideas about how to have a fun day full of family and friends and memories! ( I know I'm already married)

You can not have a wedding ceremony. You already had one.

A reception is a "thank you" to your guests for attending your ceremony. Since you already had your ceremony, you wouldn't have a reception.

Why is any event necessary? If you want to party, throw a party. It just would not be wedding related.

[Deleted User] · January 2015

You are on the right path with wanting to call it "Celebration of our Marriage" and tell your family that is what you are going with because a reception is the same day as the Ceremony and since that won't fit your situation, you want to just do the "celebration" And that's a great way to list it on the invite too. Don't worry about not having any type of a ceremony. If you had any photos from your ceremony maybe you can do a slide show at the beginning or place photos in frames around for guests to view you on your special day. Congrats on being married & have fun planning your party.

climbingsingle · January 2015

Just have the party. There's no need for a fake ceremony.

artbyallie · January 2015

Just the party. No wedding dress or bridesmaids/groomsmen. There is nothing wrong with having a non-wedding-related party. Good food, and good music (whether or not there's dancing) are really all you need.

mikenberger · January 2015

No wedding/vow renewal/white dress. You're married. Married people can't get married again. Even to the same person.

Have a party and call it good because you're already married

but no reception or anything wedding related like the dress, bridal party, cake, first dance etc.

CMGragain · January 2015

You can have a wonderful party to celebrate your marriage. It can be as fancy as you wish, but no wedding dress, no bouquet tossing, no bridesmaids, and NO CEREMONY. You can have dancing, drinking, great food, toasting, speeches, but NO CEREMONY. You are a married woman. Only little girls play dress up and pretend to be a bride.
Have a great party!

holyguacamole79 · January 2015

Parties are fun. I see nothing wrong with just having a party to celebrate your marriage. Agreed that re-doing your vows is silly.

apromise22 · January 2015

I think having a party is fine.

During dinner you could have toasts, thank everyone for coming, say how excited you are to have joined each other's families, etc. You could also have a photobooth or a DJ or other wedding reception-related things to make it festive.

If you are religious, it might be possible to arrange a private service with readings and prayers for your marriage (without vows or any of that stuff).

wrigleyville · January 2015

My cousins (B & K) eloped (as in, just the two of them) because they didn't want to have a big wedding. My aunt was pretty sad about not having a reception, though, so a few months later, they had a big party with catered food, a DJ, and a sheet cake that said "Congratulations, B&K". It wasn't wedding-y, but it felt like a reception. It was lots of fun.

They didn't wear wedding clothes or anything like that, but K wore a corsage. We drank and danced and ate cake. The invitations said something like, "A party to celebrate the marriage of B & K". They didn't register for gifts, but many people brought cards/money.

vmj23 · January 2015

My friend got married in a small wedding ceremony with her parents/siblings only but her mom insisted on having a party for her. It was just a "celebration". No vows, no fake ceremony, nothing at all wedding traditional and it was perfectly fine, not weird at all. Everyone knew they were married we were just there to celebrate.

Jen4948 · January 2015

Just have a party. You're already married, so it won't be a "wedding" or "reception." That means, no ceremony or exchange of vows, bridal gown, attendants, gift registries, cake-cutting, spotlight dances, or other " wedding " elements. Beyond that, it can be as fun and festive as you like.

wrigleyville · January 2015

Here are some invitation ideas:

BlueBirdMB · January 2015

slothiegal said:

futurehurst said:

Okay, so my husband and I are already married. We had a quick wedding with only our parents and grandparents. Our original date was supposed to be May 2015, but plans changed and we got hitched. Now we are only having the "celebration/reception" that day. I know it would be odd to have a wedding ceremony, but what could we have instead? It would be to soon for re-needing our vows. But I feel like it would be odd to have just the party. Our family wants us to throw a reception, but I have no idea on how to go about it. Please no negative comments, just ideas about how to have a fun day full of family and friends and memories! ( I know I'm already married)

You can not have a wedding ceremony. You already had one.

A reception is a "thank you" to your guests for attending your ceremony. Since you already had your ceremony, you wouldn't have a reception.

Why is any event necessary? If you want to party, throw a party. It just would not be wedding related.

It's perfectly acceptable to have a party to celebrate their marriage. Nothing about that goes against etiquette. My parents did this. There was nothing wedding related, but they eloped and my grandmother threw a party 2 months later to celebrate. Go for it, OP, but please don't renew vows that were so newly vowed.

MairePoppy · January 2015

In addition to PP's suggestions:

You could wait a bit longer and throw a fabulous one year anniversary party. You could have a wedding cake, white dress, champagne toast to each other and your guests.

slothiegal · January 2015

BlueBirdMB said:

slothiegal said:

futurehurst said:

Okay, so my husband and I are already married. We had a quick wedding with only our parents and grandparents. Our original date was supposed to be May 2015, but plans changed and we got hitched. Now we are only having the "celebration/reception" that day. I know it would be odd to have a wedding ceremony, but what could we have instead? It would be to soon for re-needing our vows. But I feel like it would be odd to have just the party. Our family wants us to throw a reception, but I have no idea on how to go about it. Please no negative comments, just ideas about how to have a fun day full of family and friends and memories! ( I know I'm already married)

You can not have a wedding ceremony. You already had one.

A reception is a "thank you" to your guests for attending your ceremony. Since you already had your ceremony, you wouldn't have a reception.

Why is any event necessary? If you want to party, throw a party. It just would not be wedding related.

It's perfectly acceptable to have a party to celebrate their marriage. Nothing about that goes against etiquette. My parents did this. There was nothing wedding related, but they eloped and my grandmother threw a party 2 months later to celebrate. Go for it, OP, but please don't renew vows that were so newly vowed.

You're absolutely right, and rereading my post, I can see that I should have worded it better. By "event" , I was referring to something that would have the wedding trappings such as a ceremony or reception, like the OP had mentioned. I'm totally cool with having a party to just get together and celebrate. Parties are fun. Parties all around.

BlueBirdMB · January 2015

MairePoppy said:

In addition to PP's suggestions:
You could wait a bit longer and throw a fabulous one year anniversary party. You could have a wedding cake, white dress, champagne toast to each other and your guests.

A white dress for a first anniversary?? Um that seems weird. Also, no wedding cake where there is some type of cake cutting like a wedding. It's not a wedding. If you want to have a first anniversary party, I guess that's fine, but still not wedding things.

MairePoppy · January 2015

BlueBirdMB said:

MairePoppy said:

In addition to PP's suggestions:
You could wait a bit longer and throw a fabulous one year anniversary party. You could have a wedding cake, white dress, champagne toast to each other and your guests.

A white dress for a first anniversary?? Um that seems weird. Also, no wedding cake where there is some type of cake cutting like a wedding. It's not a wedding. If you want to have a first anniversary party, I guess that's fine, but still not wedding things.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
stuck in the box:
White is just a color and isn't reserved for weddings only. It's not a breach of etiquette to wear white to an anniversary party. I'm not suggesting a white bridal dress with train and veil. I also don't object to a cake cutting. In my circle, it's a tradition for the guest of honor to cut and serve the first piece of cake, even at birthday parties.

What ceremony should we have?

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