Preparing the groom

thespeshulestsnowflake · January 2015

flutteringinfl said:

thespeshulestsnowflake said:

kmmssg said:

This escalated very quickly. I'm sorry I didn't convey my feelings as well as I could have.
I'll love him no matter his weight, color of his teeth or what have you. And my title "preparing the groom" wasn't meant to sound like I'm preparing a prop. The brides seem to do a zillion things to prepare themselves for the wedding day and I was just wondering what types of things/advice others had about helping your groom get ready for the big day and the rest of your life.

I know the day isn't about the pictures - its about starting our lives together. But it is a huge occasion and I know pictures will be around forever and I've had big accomplishments in my past that were photographed and all I can think about is how unhealthy I was.

Being long-distance right now makes it hard to do things together like go to the gym or make dinner together, although I can't wait to start doing things like that and become a healthy and active couple.

I'm really not a bitch - far from it - but obviously I can't voice my concerns right, which is why I tried bringing it up on here before trying to address it with him again.
Looks like I am stuck in the box. I am having a hard time figuring out how he can be in the military and not getting any exercise and ballooning to great proportions. The military usually deals with that. I have no words for how I would feel if my husband would have told me what you told him. Your OP said you didn't want to sound like a bridezilla but you were NOT talking about his health, you explicitly discussed appearance in the photos and how you didn't want him to hate how he looked in them. Nice try.

I found the bolded odd too. At one point I thought maybe he had gained weight from being in the military, but weight in muscles. But continuing reading, I doubt that's what it was.

FI has a friend who got kicked out of the army because he couldn't keep up with the physical requirements and his weight ballooned. But if that were the case with OP's FI, there would be much bigger issues than "looking nice for pictures."

Yeah, I have a friend who's just finished his time in the military and he's gained weight. Not huge amounts, just some weight since he isn't working out at the same intensity. If it were a huge amount, I'd be concerned. Weight ballooning could be an indicator of something else.

kmmssg · January 2015

thespeshulestsnowflake said:

flutteringinfl said:

thespeshulestsnowflake said:

kmmssg said:

This escalated very quickly. I'm sorry I didn't convey my feelings as well as I could have.
I'll love him no matter his weight, color of his teeth or what have you. And my title "preparing the groom" wasn't meant to sound like I'm preparing a prop. The brides seem to do a zillion things to prepare themselves for the wedding day and I was just wondering what types of things/advice others had about helping your groom get ready for the big day and the rest of your life.

I know the day isn't about the pictures - its about starting our lives together. But it is a huge occasion and I know pictures will be around forever and I've had big accomplishments in my past that were photographed and all I can think about is how unhealthy I was.

Being long-distance right now makes it hard to do things together like go to the gym or make dinner together, although I can't wait to start doing things like that and become a healthy and active couple.

I'm really not a bitch - far from it - but obviously I can't voice my concerns right, which is why I tried bringing it up on here before trying to address it with him again.
Looks like I am stuck in the box. I am having a hard time figuring out how he can be in the military and not getting any exercise and ballooning to great proportions. The military usually deals with that. I have no words for how I would feel if my husband would have told me what you told him. Your OP said you didn't want to sound like a bridezilla but you were NOT talking about his health, you explicitly discussed appearance in the photos and how you didn't want him to hate how he looked in them. Nice try.

I found the bolded odd too. At one point I thought maybe he had gained weight from being in the military, but weight in muscles. But continuing reading, I doubt that's what it was.

FI has a friend who got kicked out of the army because he couldn't keep up with the physical requirements and his weight ballooned. But if that were the case with OP's FI, there would be much bigger issues than "looking nice for pictures."

Yeah, I have a friend who's just finished his time in the military and he's gained weight. Not huge amounts, just some weight since he isn't working out at the same intensity. If it were a huge amount, I'd be concerned. Weight ballooning could be an indicator of something else.

Yep - you gain too much weight and don't get it back off the military will discharge you. That is exactly what I meant by the military dealing with it.

badbnagdway · January 2015

All of what everyone has said -- ie, you need to support the person you are marrying and not tear them down.

But also, let's face it, men have it easy when it comes to formal wear. Throw a man in a (well fitting) suit or a tux and they instantly look super fine even if they have gained weight.

Preparing the groom

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