Rules for Bridesmaids

dcbride86 · January 2015

This morning, I was listening to the radio on my way to work, and they discussed an INSANE set of rules 1 bride sent her bridesmaids. Some of the ones that I can remember are:

1. Scheduled weigh-ins will start 6 months before the wedding

2. Nobody can be skinnier than the bride. 2 BMs had to gain weight - a nutritionist would be calling them with information regarding protein shakes

3. Bedtimes would be enforced leading up to the wedding

4. All girls needed to get matching bikinis with rhinestones on the butt that says "maids" (with bandau tops - no tan lines!)

5. All girls need to have thier hair professionally cut within 1 month of the wedding

6. No BMs can change their hair color before the wedding

7. No tattoos before the wedding

There were more, but I can't remember them. Have any of you ever had/know someone who had any crazy rules like this? Obviously any "rules" for BMs are insane, but these really take the cake

maeday2 · January 2015

She sounds like a peach. She'll make a great wife.

I am only having my sister as my MOH. Her only "rules" are to bring me water at the reception and don't let me ask the DJ to play Back that Ass up or Shake that Monkey if the sobering water plan fails.

novella1186 · January 2015

That can't possibly be real. Schedule weigh-ins? Really?! I would tell that bride to shove the scale up her ass and have fun without me.

classicalandedgy · January 2015

I have no words...I'd loose a friendship over some shit like that.

novella1186 · January 2015

classicalandedgy said:

I have no words...I'd loose a friendship over some shit like that.

Right?! I can't even imagine any of my friends behaving that way or treating people that way, but if they did, that would be the end of us.

emmaaa · January 2015

That sounds too ridiculous to even be real. Weigh-ins??? Kiss my ass.

maeday2 · January 2015

emmaaa said:

That sounds too ridiculous to even be real. Weigh-ins??? Kiss my ass.

banana468 · January 2015

I can't imagine that any of that is real.

And if it is, I have to wonder what she expects her husband to do if she ever gains weight.

mikenberger · January 2015

dcbride86 said:

This morning, I was listening to the radio on my way to work, and they discussed an INSANE set of rules 1 bride sent her bridesmaids. Some of the ones that I can remember are:
1. Scheduled weigh-ins will start 6 months before the wedding
2. Nobody can be skinnier than the bride. 2 BMs had to gain weight - a nutritionist would be calling them with information regarding protein shakes
3. Bedtimes would be enforced leading up to the wedding
4. All girls needed to get matching bikinis with rhinestones on the butt that says "maids" (with bandau tops - no tan lines!)
5. All girls need to have thier hair professionally cut within 1 month of the wedding
6. No BMs can change their hair color before the wedding
7. No tattoos before the wedding

There were more, but I can't remember them. Have any of you ever had/know someone who had any crazy rules like this? Obviously any "rules" for BMs are insane, but these really take the cake

Yup. Bitches be cray. I'll never understand how these people have friends in the first place. It's not like they just become crazy. This is a deep seeded cray.

kat1114 · January 2015

When I bought junior bridesmaids dresses at David's Bridal, they included some random coupons.

One of them was a set of coupons to Jenny Craig that said "for MOB", "for MOH", and for "BM."

Crap like that is why brides think it's okay to treat their nearest and dearest like shit.

emmaaa · January 2015

maeday2 said:

emmaaa said:

That sounds too ridiculous to even be real. Weigh-ins??? Kiss my ass.

Love that gif, and Tyra. Yes, kiss my FAT ass!

maeday2 · January 2015

kat1114 said:

When I bought junior bridesmaids dresses at David's Bridal, they included some random coupons. One of them was a set of coupons to Jenny Craig that said "for MOB", "for MOH", and for "BM." Crap like that is why brides think it's okay to treat their nearest and dearest like shit.

That's infuriating.

Right after changing my FB relationship status to engaged, my ads were for plastic surgery and weight loss.

Because my FI obviously doesn't love me the way I am. I need to be perfect to be a bride.

novella1186 · January 2015

maeday2 said:

kat1114 said:

When I bought junior bridesmaids dresses at David's Bridal, they included some random coupons. One of them was a set of coupons to Jenny Craig that said "for MOB", "for MOH", and for "BM." Crap like that is why brides think it's okay to treat their nearest and dearest like shit.

That's infuriating.

Right after changing my FB relationship status to engaged, my ads were for plastic surgery and weight loss.

Because my FI obviously doesn't love me the way I am. I need to be perfect to be a bride.

The scary thing is, though, that exists for a reason. There really are people who get engaged and say "Ok time for a boob job and lipo! I need to be the perfect bride!"

lnixon8 · January 2015

I'm imagining the bride with a rag and some chloroform to "enforce" bedtimes.

WhatawagSBNy · January 2015

Sounds like she was joking with her bridesmaids and figured they would take one look at the list and laugh.

amelisha · January 2015

Have any of you seen the Jezebel article series on sorority guidelines for rush week? This is like that. Google it, it's horrifying.

I don't make friends with shallow people, so I've never seen anything like this in real life, but some of the brides I've seen on SYTTD make me wonder (Especially on Bridesmaids: Atlanta...every time poor Brandon has to console the one heavier girl everyone's treating like crap I want to die from shame that adults act like this.)

mikenberger · January 2015

amelisha said:

Have any of you seen the Jezebel article series on sorority guidelines for rush week? This is like that. Google it, it's horrifying.

I don't make friends with shallow people, so I've never seen anything like this in real life, but some of the brides I've seen on SYTTD make me wonder (Especially on Bridesmaids: Atlanta...every time poor Brandon has to console the one heavier girl everyone's treating like crap I want to die from shame that adults act like this.)

On this right now. Whaaaaaat?

emmaaa · January 2015

amelisha said:

Have any of you seen the Jezebel article series on sorority guidelines for rush week? This is like that. Google it, it's horrifying.

I don't make friends with shallow people, so I've never seen anything like this in real life, but some of the brides I've seen on SYTTD make me wonder (Especially on Bridesmaids: Atlanta...every time poor Brandon has to console the one heavier girl everyone's treating like crap I want to die from shame that adults act like this.)

I saw that! It is so sad that those guidelines existed and went viral. I wasn't in a sorrity and never really had the desire to, but I know some girls who are who love it. It really makes the Greek life look bad.

buttercup1958 · January 2015

Yeah no. I would just roll my eyes and bye felicia! I do think this type of insanity does exisit we just never see it until its too late.

Jen4948 · January 2015

Actually, I remember seeing that list of "rules" a long time ago. It's so out there I think it's just satire. Any bride who really expects her bridesmaids to adhere to a single one of them can expect to shortly find herself with no wedding party at all, at least on her side.

lmcooper86 · January 2015

They were probably talking about this crazy bridezilla: http://gawker.com/this-terrifying-bride-is-only-joking-except-when-shes-1343098715

It's completely insane.

pinkcow13 · January 2015

I read this!!!!! She sent this email to her bridesmaids. No clue if this is real or not, I hope it's not. If you read the comments below, supposedly one of the people who commented knows her.

thisismynickname2 · January 2015

My coworker, no joke, sent out a contract to her bridesmaids. It outlined exactly what they were expected to pay for the shower and bachelorette they were expected to throw for her. It said what they'd have to pay for dresses. It dictated hair and all of that. Not weight though, thank God. If they couldn't adhere to the contract, they couldn't be a bridesmaid.

I'm not kidding. I'm not being one of those, "Oh, my cousin knew a person who..." No. Really. I swear to God my coworker did this. She was the talk of the department for awhile thanks to this madness.

Aside from her though, a friend of mine was a bridesmaid for this girl who got married around age 22 (so in the phase where you probably don't know any better). The maids had to be strictly identical. Exact same hairdo, exact same shoes, exact same everything. I thought that was obsessive enough even back then!

levioosa · January 2015

That is so gross. I'd either laugh in the bride's face if she told me that, or I'd peace out before she could drag me onto the scale.

vulpiepop · January 2015

lmcooper86 said:

They were probably talking about this crazy bridezilla: http://gawker.com/this-terrifying-bride-is-only-joking-except-when-shes-1343098715
It's completely insane.

Oh dear god...this is horrifying to read and yet I can't stop reading it and cringing

charcoalandblush · January 2015

maeday2 said:

kat1114 said:

When I bought junior bridesmaids dresses at David's Bridal, they included some random coupons. One of them was a set of coupons to Jenny Craig that said "for MOB", "for MOH", and for "BM." Crap like that is why brides think it's okay to treat their nearest and dearest like shit.

That's infuriating.

Right after changing my FB relationship status to engaged, my ads were for plastic surgery and weight loss.

Because my FI obviously doesn't love me the way I am. I need to be perfect to be a bride.

Mine were all for pregnancy tests and baby stuff... wonder what that says about me. Lol

lmcooper86 · January 2015

vulpiepop said:

lmcooper86 said:

They were probably talking about this crazy bridezilla: http://gawker.com/this-terrifying-bride-is-only-joking-except-when-shes-1343098715
It's completely insane.

Oh dear god...this is horrifying to read and yet I can't stop reading it and cringing

That was exactly my reaction. I read it months ago and just shook my head the whole way through. I'm surprised she had any BMs left by the time the wedding rolled around.

rockin30ish · January 2015

What a nut bar! I would've been out of that wedding in a heartbeat.

I tease my maids that I can, at any point, turn into Bridezilla. Now, I have some crazy requests I can throw at them at any given time just to see the horror and disgust on their faces. Then we can all laugh about it cause I'm not really that crazy of a bitch.

charcoalandblush · January 2015

One of my friends forwarded me a bachelorette party email that one of her friends got that was similarly ridiculous. There was a spreadsheet of everything everyone owed to subsidize the bride's stuff, a detailed to-the-minute schedule for the entire three day weekend, etc.

My favorite was that Sunday brunch was listed as "optional."

sophhabobopha · January 2015

Why the bedtime?

rockin30ish · January 2015

I posted that link to my fb tagging my maids. A humorous convo with MoH ensued and I posted this:

Although, it has given me an idea. I don't want you or K-maid even coming close to looking better than me. So, from this point forward, you are both on high calorie, high protein, high fat diets. No exercise what so ever. I don't even want you going up and down stairs. And smear crisco on your faces each night and each morning so you are covered in pimples. And here are your dresses

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