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PrettyGirlLost · February 2015

montb said:

I started this post for feedback which some of you have given me so thank you. I did not start this post so people could start insulting me or how I feel about something.

You are getting feedback- in every single post you are getting feedback.

You understand the diffrence between feedback and validation, right?

antoto · February 2015

OP, I know how it feels to have so many people be blunt and let you know that something you are doing or something you think is rude/incorrect. One of my first posts on this board was like that too. My first reaction, like yours, was to be hurt and feel defensive. Try to fight those feelings. These people are in fact being helpful. This board helped me avoid a lot of etiquette fails that are unfortunately increasingly common.

The fact is that it is over stepping your bounds to ask your MH/BM to do favors for you. And your wedding will not be on their minds very often. They WILL be super excited for you and have a ton of fun with you at your wedding - and that is the important part. If you need someone to talk to about the wedding who is equally as excited about it just talk to your FI

You should not be picking your MH based on who helps you with favors and who does not. Try to remember why you picked these two ladies in the first place. Hold on to that.

aurianna · February 2015

@brittanymontgomery,

If you demote your MOHs because you're disappointed in your relationship, it is only going to make your relationship worse. You think you see a drift now? Imagine what would happen if you demoted them?
If I were in their shoes and demoted, I would definitely feel like you were punishing me for prioritizing my education over your wedding. I would resent you for that. And I'd probably think you were a bridezilla.
Do you want your friends to think that about you?

I wouldn't suggest adding a new MOH at this juncture either. Even if it isn't your intention, the other two MOHs are going to feel like you added another because you think they aren't good enough. Please don't make them feel that way.
The newest MOH might still feel second string since she wasn't asked to begin with.
And the rest of your bridal party will probably feel bad too because now half of the party has honor. And they might wonder if they aren't good enough either since they didn't get promoted.

Leave things as they are. Just focus on your friendships.

levioosa · February 2015

Oh, and education trumps a wedding every time.

Cookie Pusher · February 2015

Came for the DD.

levioosa · February 2015

Ah yes, I always forget how offensive it is to hear that you should be a good friend. DD away!

P.S. It's all been quoted, btw, OP.

NowIAmSyp · February 2015

Knew that was coming...

huskypuppy14 · February 2015

You can't delete your post, and you've been quoted. So now more people are going to read your posts (because pp quoted, thanks guys!) then if you had just let it die.