this is the code for the render ad
Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Chit Chat
Chit Chat
New Discussion

Parents getting tattoos for kids

lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
in Chit Chat
I was curious to hear your opinions on parents getting tattoos of things to make their kid feel better.

The most recent one I saw is of parents getting a birthmark tattoo to match their daughter. http://www.buzzfeed.com/javiermoreno/these-parents-got-matching-tattoo-of-thier-daughters-birthma

The older one I saw is of parents getting insulin pump tattoos. http://www.montrealgazette.com/health/Quebec+couple+insulin+pump+tattoos+boost+diabetic+spirits/5946380/story.html

Frankly, I think it's a bit ridiculous, te birthmark especially. The parents said the kid was 4 or 5 and the birthmark hadn't faded. That's really stupid of the parents because that's not that much time. I knew a girl who had a red birthmark like that, except it was on her face. I don't think it faded completely until she was in her mid teens.

The insulin pump I can understand a bit more, but I just think about what if he doesn't always need it? What if research and technology advance enough that there are better and simpler ways to treat diabetes in a few years? And even if that never comes about, once he's a little older, he (hopefully) will stop worrying about what people think about his insulin pump and it won't be a big deal. Then the parents are stuck with that tattoo.
Report Reply to Post
«1

Re: Parents getting tattoos for kids

  • hellohkbhellohkb mod
    Moderator Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its
    As someone who has tattoos and loves them, I'm meh about these tattoos. I don't really have an opinion of parent tattoos in general because I just don't really care either way. If people want a tattoo based on something about their kid, cool. If you don't, also cool. But the thing about these tattoos, the first one at least, is the reaction it's has gained from other people.

    I've legitimately read and heard people fawning over them saying they're amazing parents for tattooing the birthmark. Like, I'm pretty sure we don't know these people IRL and getting tattoos doesn't measure someone's ability to parent. For all we know, they could be total AWs and just wanted the tattoo for appearances. OR, they could be really awesome amazing parents. I guess what I'm basically trying to say is I really don't get the amount of media attention on these two particular instances. You got a tattoo. Congratulations?


    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers



    Report Reply
  • jenna8984jenna8984 member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer

    I have many tattoos and I definitely want them for my future children, like their names or initials or something. I actually have my nephew's initials hidden in my sleeve.

    But I personally don't like these ones. I think it's weird and that it would be better to just encourage the child how beautiful they are. Tell them how everyone has something that makes them "different" and that is their thing, and embrace it. We pretty much all have birthmarks, some larger than others. I do honestly think the leg tattoos just draw MORE attention to it.

                                                                     

    image

    Report Reply
  • mikenbergermikenberger member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    I'm of the "Embrace your uniqueness" camp. Isn't that what kids were formerly taught?

    image
    Report Reply
  • novella1186novella1186 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    jenna8984 said:

    I have many tattoos and I definitely want them for my future children, like their names or initials or something. I actually have my nephew's initials hidden in my sleeve.

    But I personally don't like these ones. I think it's weird and that it would be better to just encourage the child how beautiful they are. Tell them how everyone has something that makes them "different" and that is their thing, and embrace it. We pretty much all have birthmarks, some larger than others. I do honestly think the leg tattoos just draw MORE attention to it.

    totally agree with this. Kids struggle with their differences throughout their youth and maybe even beyond that. What's gonna happen when this little girl doesn't like something about her face or her skin tone or whatever? Will she have a mega breakdown and not be able to cope? Will the parents alter themselves again? Will she never get the idea that being unique is special? 

    I like the idea of parents being so outwardly supportive in a bold way to back their kids. But. My parents never tattooed freckles on their faces no matter how many times I said I hated my freckles, and I've survived. 
    image
    Report Reply
  • FiancBFiancB member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    I knew a high school aged girl with a birthmark like that, but it covered a lot of her upper body too.  I knew her through dance so it was really obvious when she was wearing a leotard.  That was the first time I'd seen a birth mark like that and, yeah, it caught my attention, but I also thought she was extremely pretty.  It was a "huh, that's interesting" thing, not a "oh my god she's deformed" thing.  I can see being upset when the kid is tiny and other people think it's an injury or something, but other people are dumb like that.  Like Asian parents getting reported because their baby has Mongolian spots, which look like bruises. 

    I think it would be a lot more helpful to show her pics of this model:

    image

    I'm sure she's been teased and got some odd looks but now I see her everywhere.  Goes to show you that being different is a good thing. 

    The insulin thing I get a little more, but overall these kids are REALLY young.,  Like I really doubt other kids are teasing them at this point.  When I was that age I had a friend that was a dwarf and we barely noticed.  At this point I've known her for so long I still forget she's a dwarf even though she's half my height, and then people stare and I'm oh, right.  

    IDK.  I think it's a nice thing to, say, shave your head when someone you know loses it to cancer. This, mehhhh. People can do what they want obviously but I don't think it's super helpful and it's kind of AW.  Also the leg tattoos look awful.  Kid looks fine.  Parents look awful. 
    image
    Report Reply
  • maeday2maeday2 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    I heard about the birthmark tattoo on the radio this morning and had the same thought. 

    Awesome that those parents want to help her embrace her uniqueness, but it's kinda counterproductive. There are better ways of going about that. 

    She won't always be under the protective wings of her parents, and people suck. I don't presume that this is their only way of showing her she's perfect like she is. I just hope they are also building up her self-esteem in other ways and teaching her how to manage bullies. 
    image
    Report Reply
  • maeday2maeday2 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    FiancB said:

    I knew a high school aged girl with a birthmark like that, but it covered a lot of her upper body too.  I knew her through dance so it was really obvious when she was wearing a leotard.  That was the first time I'd seen a birth mark like that and, yeah, it caught my attention, but I also thought she was extremely pretty.  It was a "huh, that's interesting" thing, not a "oh my god she's deformed" thing.  I can see being upset when the kid is tiny and other people think it's an injury or something, but other people are dumb like that.  Like Asian parents getting reported because their baby has Mongolian spots, which look like bruises. 


    I think it would be a lot more helpful to show her pics of this model:

    image

    I'm sure she's been teased and got some odd looks but now I see her everywhere.  Goes to show you that being different is a good thing. 

    The insulin thing I get a little more, but overall these kids are REALLY young.,  Like I really doubt other kids are teasing them at this point.  When I was that age I had a friend that was a dwarf and we barely noticed.  At this point I've known her for so long I still forget she's a dwarf even though she's half my height, and then people stare and I'm oh, right.  

    IDK.  I think it's a nice thing to, say, shave your head when someone you know loses it to cancer. This, mehhhh. People can do what they want obviously but I don't think it's super helpful and it's kind of AW.  Also the leg tattoos look awful.  Kid looks fine.  Parents look awful. 
    This reminded me of something. 

    It's not something that was ever a huge cause for ridicule by my peers, but I have a mole on my face. I used to get picked on for that as a child. I hated it. I wanted it removed. 

    Cindy Crawford was pretty damn popular when I was a child. My mom would console me and tell me that Cindy Crawford has a mole on her face in the same spot and she's doing just fine as a model. That would also be my retort when kids made fun of it. They backed off. 

    I now love my Cindy Crawford mole, but I can remember comments about it through high school. 

    All that to say, your idea of showing her successful people with the same characteristics was a positive experience for me. If you love you and you show that to other people, they won't ridicule you. 
    image
    Report Reply
  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    Moderator 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    I don't have an issue with the fact that they get tattoos. Whatever. 

    But like others, I don't think this action enforces the message "there's nothing wrong with (insert whatever) and you're beautiful." 

    I think it says, "look! there are other people like you, so that makes it ok." It would be ok even if the kid was the only person in the world with (insert whatever). 
    *********************************************************************************

    image
    Report Reply
  • hellosweetie1015hellosweetie1015 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    FiancB said:

    I knew a high school aged girl with a birthmark like that, but it covered a lot of her upper body too.  I knew her through dance so it was really obvious when she was wearing a leotard.  That was the first time I'd seen a birth mark like that and, yeah, it caught my attention, but I also thought she was extremely pretty.  It was a "huh, that's interesting" thing, not a "oh my god she's deformed" thing.  I can see being upset when the kid is tiny and other people think it's an injury or something, but other people are dumb like that.  Like Asian parents getting reported because their baby has Mongolian spots, which look like bruises. 


    I think it would be a lot more helpful to show her pics of this model:

    image

    I'm sure she's been teased and got some odd looks but now I see her everywhere.  Goes to show you that being different is a good thing. 

    The insulin thing I get a little more, but overall these kids are REALLY young.,  Like I really doubt other kids are teasing them at this point.  When I was that age I had a friend that was a dwarf and we barely noticed.  At this point I've known her for so long I still forget she's a dwarf even though she's half my height, and then people stare and I'm oh, right.  

    IDK.  I think it's a nice thing to, say, shave your head when someone you know loses it to cancer. This, mehhhh. People can do what they want obviously but I don't think it's super helpful and it's kind of AW.  Also the leg tattoos look awful.  Kid looks fine.  Parents look awful. 
    Firstly: THAT PERSON IS BEAUTIFUL. Oh my gosh. 

    Secondly: I am indifferent to this, as a whole. As long as you aren't abusing your child, I'm not gonna judge your choice as a parent. Would I make the same choice? Probably not, in this instance, but my choice to not do this does not make their choice any less valid.

    I think the internet attention is what gives the AW vibe. If they had done it privately and not shared it on Facebook, it wouldn't have gone viral and fifty gajillion people wouldn't have seen it, and we wouldn't be discussing it. 
    Daisypath Wedding tickers
    image
    Report Reply
  • larrygagalarrygaga member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    I don't care what people choose to decorate themselves with. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image

    Report Reply
  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    Moderator 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    mikenberger said:

    The other annoying thing:


    "My son wears glasses and he gets made fun of for wearing glasses. Share this photo to show him that glasses are beautiful!" Or "Post your own photo of you wearing glasses to show him that there are people like him out there!"

    Do you live under a rock with your child? Has your child never noticed other people wearing glasses? Hell, when I was in middle school: glasses, braces, was overweight, acne, freckles, ginger AND I was in band. Could I possibly be any more stereotypical? I would get picked on (my last name doesn't help AT ALL) and my Mom would tell me that all the other kids were jealous because they didn't have freckles. Or they didn't have red hair or something similar. Or that braces are temporary, even though they feel like they're on forever. Then she'd grab one of her middle school photos for self shaming and "Look! I survived and you'll survive too." Self acceptance is more important than social acceptance. Because if you don't like you, nobody else is going to like you.
    Yea, I have freckles, too. And I have a very light strawberry birthmark about the size of a quarter on my torso - OMG PEOPLE CAN SEE IF IT I WEAR A BIKINI!!! A few kids made fun of me for these things (until they got served). 

    But my parents didn't get themselves covered in freckle tattoos or get a pink circle on their torso to make me feel like one of the gang or something. They were like "there's nothing wrong with you. You're beautiful. Ignore anyone who says otherwise." 
    *********************************************************************************

    image
    Report Reply
  • pinkcow13pinkcow13 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    Idk how I feel about it. I mean it's the parents body, and their choice, so whatever. I guess it's the intentions behind the actual tattoo that I find to be counterproductive, like others stated.

    I actually have a birthmark that covers my entire right arm and hand. It has faded over time, but it is still noticeable. As a child it was very prominent. It looks a bit like the child's in the picture. My parents just told me that it was a birthmark, and that was that. That it was something that made me unique. They never made me feel that there was something wrong with me, or that I was so weirdly different that they needed to get tattoos to commiserate with me. I think letting me handle it on my own toughened me up and made me realize that it's really not a big deal, having this birthmark.

    It definitely would draw more attention if all 3 of us had the same birthmark. People don't even realize that I have the birthmark, anymore, until I guess maybe they stare at my arm, or it's summer or something. They ask what happened to my arm, I tell them it's a birthmark, and they leave it alone. As a child I got more questions about it from other kids, but I think the fact that I was raised to treat it as NBD made others treat it the same. 
                                 Anniversary
    imageimageimage


     

    Report Reply
  • jenna8984jenna8984 member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    @maeday2 Me too! I have a birthmark on my cheek similar to Paula Abdul's and I loved her growing up so it made me feel better/ prettier!

                                                                     

    image

    Report Reply
  • VulgarGirlVulgarGirl member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    As a tattoo artist I have seen some ideas for tattoos and even dumber reasons for tattoos. I've also fixed/covered up some of those tattoos. Usually the story starts with, well it was spring break...

    These...fall low on my "not a great idea" list. Your body, your choice.
    Report Reply
  • levioosalevioosa member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    lovesclimbing said:

    I was curious to hear your opinions on parents getting tattoos of things to make their kid feel better.

    The most recent one I saw is of parents getting a birthmark tattoo to match their daughter. http://www.buzzfeed.com/javiermoreno/these-parents-got-matching-tattoo-of-thier-daughters-birthma

    The older one I saw is of parents getting insulin pump tattoos. http://www.montrealgazette.com/health/Quebec+couple+insulin+pump+tattoos+boost+diabetic+spirits/5946380/story.html

    Frankly, I think it's a bit ridiculous, te birthmark especially. The parents said the kid was 4 or 5 and the birthmark hadn't faded. That's really stupid of the parents because that's not that much time. I knew a girl who had a red birthmark like that, except it was on her face. I don't think it faded completely until she was in her mid teens.

    The insulin pump I can understand a bit more, but I just think about what if he doesn't always need it? What if research and technology advance enough that there are better and simpler ways to treat diabetes in a few years? And even if that never comes about, once he's a little older, he (hopefully) will stop worrying about what people think about his insulin pump and it won't be a big deal. Then the parents are stuck with that tattoo.

    To the bolded, for a lot of birthmarks, that's total bullshit.  Some actually get darker with age.  That little girl might not have a birthmark that's "just going to fade with age."  Who are you to judge and say that it's just going to go away, or that it's not that big of a deal?  Do I agree with the parents getting the tattoos?  Eh, I think it would have been better to focus more on fostering self-love and acceptance (which they might be doing anyways) rather than singling her out by tattooing themselves (ironic), but I'm not part of their family, and it's not my body.  I do agree with @FiancB though, those tattoos are terribly done. 

    My Mom has Sturge-Weber.  It isn't "just a birthmark," and her concern about it wasn't for vanity.  I hate when people judge others' birthmarks.  You have no idea if that birthmark is cosmetic, or if it actually comes with a host of physical disabilities.  And birthmarks do often cause a lot bullying earlier in life.  Even though my Mom got bullied a ton as a kid because of her birthmark, you know what she really disliked about herself?  Her nose.  I think judging a family on a topic or situation you know absolutely nothing about is extremely presumptuous. 


    image
    Report Reply
  • FiancBFiancB member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    To me it just kind of seems a bit drastic to be like oh my god, some fuddy duddies in the grocery store commented on my child's appearance! Now I need to make a drastic change to dissuade the fuddy duddies.  The kids are just so young I doubt it bothers them to be different; it seems like it's more about the parents being uncomfortable with the kids being different. 

    Like, there is always something.  My sister has five kids. My sister is white and married to a Filipino man, so 4/5 kids look Filipino.  The second oldest is adopted and translucently white.  Usually when she goes to the store and stuff she doesn't have her husband with her.  She gets a lot of people asking her right in front of the kids what the story is, or commenting on the sheer number of kids.  IDK, I've come to the conclusion most people just need their mouth taped shut when in public. 

    Along with the talk about Cindy Crawford and Paula Abdul, I know Tyra Banks was called five-head. Now that's her trademark. Kat Dennings and Lauren Hutton have big gaps in their teeth.  I think we all have something that we were uncomfortable with when we were young (especially young adolescent, not a good time self-esteem wise) that we've grown to love about ourselves. I was the chubby kid and now I've got kickass curves.  I was weird and had a hard time making friends but now I'm pretty good at being creative and like to think I'm more likeable now than I would be if I'd been more popular when I was young. . 

    Meh. Again, doing this doesn't mean that they aren't addressing the issue in other ways.  They probably just like tattoos and felt it was as good a reason as any to get another. 
    image
    Report Reply
  • photokittyphotokitty mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    I think it's dumb bc I can look a birthmark and appreciate the beauty in it and of the person. That birthmark tattoo - i'm going to stare at it and think what an ugly, weird, poorly done tattoo. It would never occur to me they were trying to match their child's birthmark, bc that red ink doesn't look one bit like a birthmark.

    At least she solved the problem of "old" people staring "cruelly" at her kid, now they can stare at her and have a legit "what the hell it that?" That's just going to come off looking like a bad tattoo unless you are told the story behind it.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

    Report Reply
  • JennyColadaJennyColada member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    edited March 2015
    I have an ugly birthmark on my leg. It's super dark brown and when I wore shorts/skirts it was not uncommon for people to ask if it's mud or dog poo. For YEARS I only wore pants, as I didn't want to show my leg. Even in California summer. Now I just give no fucks. I love skirts and dresses and wear them often. But I still dislike my birthmark.

    But my parents having the same birthmark (they don't, but if they did) wouldn't have made me feel much better. I'm still getting asked awkward questions and feeling embarassed. I don't care if 99% of the population has the same thing: me feeling embarassed is what matters to me. I take little solace in knowing I'm "not the only one".

    Honestly, I'd have appreciated it more if my parents helped me come up with ways to feel more secure and confident about my body, and that includes changing the parts that I don't like (like getting my mark removed, or teaching me how to curl my hair, or various other things that in interested in).

    There's nothing wrong with wanting to change parts of yourself, and moreso it frustrates me that I feel like we've reached a point where I have to love every single thing about myself and that if I ever want to change anything for any reason that there's something wrong with me.
    Report Reply
  • sophhabobophasophhabobopha member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    I'm not a fan.
    image
    Report Reply
  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I'm not a huge fan.   I have a birthmark on my arm that looks like a big puffy black and blue.   It's part of who I am.   It doesn't need to be part of who my mom and dad are too.   

    And while everyone who sees me for the first time says, "Oh my GOD what happened to your arm!?!? I feel like it opens the door to a unique conversation.

    Funny story:  when in the throws of unmedicated labor as I was THISCLOSE to delivering baby #2, I remember hearing my OB ask, "What's that on her arm??"   DH told them about my birthmark.

    Once DS was out, it was the first question he had to ask me because he refused to take my husband's word for it. 
    Report Reply
  • novella1186novella1186 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    banana468 said:

    I'm not a huge fan.   I have a birthmark on my arm that looks like a big puffy black and blue.   It's part of who I am.   It doesn't need to be part of who my mom and dad are too.   


    And while everyone who sees me for the first time says, "Oh my GOD what happened to your arm!?!? I feel like it opens the door to a unique conversation.

    Funny story:  when in the throws of unmedicated labor as I was THISCLOSE to delivering baby #2, I remember hearing my OB ask, "What's that on her arm??"   DH told them about my birthmark.

    Once DS was out, it was the first question he had to ask me because he refused to take my husband's word for it. 
    Not to derail this chat but do you guys see that #2 got hyperlinked? Does TK do hashtags now too? So what is it, pinterest AND twitter? Pintitter?
    image
    Report Reply
  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    WTF? Yeah, I just meant the second baby.
    Report Reply
  • JennyColadaJennyColada member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    #baby
    Report Reply
  • hellohkbhellohkb mod
    Moderator Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its
    #blessed


    Daisypath Anniversary tickers Daisypath Anniversary tickers



    Report Reply
  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited March 2015
    I was curious to hear your opinions on parents getting tattoos of things to make their kid feel better.

    The most recent one I saw is of parents getting a birthmark tattoo to match their daughter. http://www.buzzfeed.com/javiermoreno/these-parents-got-matching-tattoo-of-thier-daughters-birthma

    The older one I saw is of parents getting insulin pump tattoos. http://www.montrealgazette.com/health/Quebec+couple+insulin+pump+tattoos+boost+diabetic+spirits/5946380/story.html

    Frankly, I think it's a bit ridiculous, te birthmark especially. The parents said the kid was 4 or 5 and the birthmark hadn't faded. That's really stupid of the parents because that's not that much time. I knew a girl who had a red birthmark like that, except it was on her face. I don't think it faded completely until she was in her mid teens.

    The insulin pump I can understand a bit more, but I just think about what if he doesn't always need it? What if research and technology advance enough that there are better and simpler ways to treat diabetes in a few years? And even if that never comes about, once he's a little older, he (hopefully) will stop worrying about what people think about his insulin pump and it won't be a big deal. Then the parents are stuck with that tattoo.


    To the bolded, for a lot of birthmarks, that's total bullshit.  Some actually get darker with age.  That little girl might not have a birthmark that's "just going to fade with age."  Who are you to judge and say that it's just going to go away, or that it's not that big of a deal?      Do I agree with the parents getting the tattoos?  Eh, I think it would have been better to focus more on fostering self-love and acceptance (which they might be doing anyways) rather than singling her out by tattooing themselves (ironic), but I'm not part of their family, and it's not my body.  I do agree with @FiancB though, those tattoos are terribly done. 

    My Mom has Sturge-Weber.  It isn't "just a birthmark," and her concern about it wasn't for vanity.  I hate when people judge others' birthmarks.  You have no idea if that birthmark is cosmetic, or if it actually comes with a host of physical disabilities.  And birthmarks do often cause a lot bullying earlier in life.  Even though my Mom got bullied a ton as a kid because of her birthmark, you know what she really disliked about herself?  Her nose.  I think judging a family on a topic or situation you know absolutely nothing about is extremely presumptuous. 
    To the first and second bolded: I am not judging this girl's birthmarks. I don't know where you got that idea. I am judging the parents reasoning for getting tattoos of their daughter's birthmarks. I realize not all birthmarks fade with age.  I actually have a birthmark that got darker with age. However, in this case, the mom said in the article, "It hasn't faded with time. In fact some days, it looks darker than others."  That tells me they think it could fade, not that it was caused by something else or has some other condition linked to it.

    The mom said, "It was the first time I had taken her out without covering her up and it confirmed all my worries and fears."  Nowhere does the article say that the little girl felt bad about her birth mark or was embarrassed by them or felt different before her parents got them. It was all about the parents and their feelings. This girl, I think, has a good chance of growing up to be ashamed of her birthmark because of her parents' attitude toward it.

    To the final bolded, we judge and snark on people on here all the time. We have threads come through here on a somewhat regular basis that judge the bumpies for not feeding their kids fruit snacks or ranting about feeding kids solids too early or whatever. What's wrong with me snarking and judging these parents for what I feel is illogical reasoning and poor decision meaning?

    ETA: Also, @banana468 and @novella1186, FYI, the hashtags aren't new. They've been around for months.
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards