Random Acts of Kindness

VulgarGirl · March 2015

wandajune6 said:

KatieinBkln said:

MagicInk said:

KatieinBkln said:
These are all so sweet!

Okay, I have a dumb question. How does "paying for the person behind" actually work? Do you just give them your credit card number? Throw a wad of cash and hope it's enough? Wait around till after they are rung up and then "swoop in"? (That doesn't seem quite right, especially since I'm always hearing about people doing it at drive-thrus). Someone explain the logistics so I can start being a better person!
Usually at drive-thrus they've already put in the person's order before they get up to the window, so they can just total it up for you.

Like at the speaker you order a large coffee and then the person already at the widow is like "I wanna pay for whoever is behind me". Am at all explaining this in a way that makes sense? Cause I'm kind of confusing myself.
Ah, that does make sense. I'm still not sure about non-pre-order situations, though!
Yeah, those I have no idea.

I guess you could just be like "Hey, here's 20 bucks use it for the next person", might not cover the whole meal...but some of it?

Back before EZ Pass, on those rare occasions where my parents would be driving separate cars, the first person would always pay the tolls for both cars. They also had a habit of giving the person at the tollbooth a $10 and tell them to pay for other cars until it ran out.

It's actually one of my favorite memories of my parents helping me move into the dorms--- my dad paying for my mom and confusing the hell out of the tollbooth attendant with his request!

So...we don't have toll roads in my area so I was totally thinking the Disney fastpass thing...

Took me a minute.

wandajune6 · March 2015

@MagicInk-- We actually have IPass here but I thought calling it EZPass would make more sense to everyone else!

That would be such a cool thing at Disney though!

novella1186 · March 2015

MagicInk said:

KatieinBkln said:
These are all so sweet!

Okay, I have a dumb question. How does "paying for the person behind" actually work? Do you just give them your credit card number? Throw a wad of cash and hope it's enough? Wait around till after they are rung up and then "swoop in"? (That doesn't seem quite right, especially since I'm always hearing about people doing it at drive-thrus). Someone explain the logistics so I can start being a better person!
Usually at drive-thrus they've already put in the person's order before they get up to the window, so they can just total it up for you.

Like at the speaker you order a large coffee and then the person already at the widow is like "I wanna pay for whoever is behind me". Am at all explaining this in a way that makes sense? Cause I'm kind of confusing myself.

Yep, whenever I pay for people at the drive-thru I just get to the window where you pay and say "I wanna pay for that person behind me" because their order is already in, so the window person already knows the total. I hand them my card and they ring up my order and that person's order. Super simple.

I have a friend who's a new mom and she said sometimes when she and her boyfriend go to restaurants, they look around for other young couples with a baby, and when it looks like the couple is finishing up, they slyly tell the waiter that they want to pick up their bill. So they secretly/anonymously pay for dinner for that couple.

I was at my favorite bar once with my best friend and we were talking about the dumbest stuff. There was a guy sitting next to us who was by himself and just sat there quietly the whole time. When he got up to leave, he said, "You ladies have kept me very entertained. You're very funny! I want to buy your drinks." He handed me a $20 bill and walked out. I was so taken aback that I didn't even know what to do. We used it for our drinks and gave the rest to the bartender as a tip. It was super nice of that guy, but I have to say it was really awkward to just be handed cash lol

allispain · March 2015

While not exactly a random act of kindness, I came across this story just now, and thought it might add to the positive vibes. Also, I would have a blast at that dance party :-)

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/03/06/dancing-man-found-bodyshamed-dance-party_n_6817794.html?cps=gravity_1600_8542926779530676973

mlg78 · March 2015

A couple of weeks ago I stopped at Starbucks on the way to work and paid for the woman behind me. About five hours later I was going through McDonalds drive thru to get more coffee (it was one of THOSE days...) and the person in front of me paid for me. It was awesome to see the goodness in the world come full circle in just five hours.

WinstonsGirl · March 2015

KatieinBkln said:
These are all so sweet!

Okay, I have a dumb question. How does "paying for the person behind" actually work? Do you just give them your credit card number? Throw a wad of cash and hope it's enough? Wait around till after they are rung up and then "swoop in"? (That doesn't seem quite right, especially since I'm always hearing about people doing it at drive-thrus). Someone explain the logistics so I can start being a better person!

Most people already covered it. At Tim's, there is usually room for 3-4 cars between the order mic and the pay/receive window so you just ask to tack on the order behind you. Other people have ordered a GC and left it there to be used until it runs out. My cousin used to work at a Tim's. She said their record was over 40 drivers paying for the person behind them before someone just said thanks and drove off. Lots will get their order paid for and then pay for the car behind them too

novella1186 · March 2015

WinstonsGirl said:

KatieinBkln said:
These are all so sweet!

Okay, I have a dumb question. How does "paying for the person behind" actually work? Do you just give them your credit card number? Throw a wad of cash and hope it's enough? Wait around till after they are rung up and then "swoop in"? (That doesn't seem quite right, especially since I'm always hearing about people doing it at drive-thrus). Someone explain the logistics so I can start being a better person!
Most people already covered it. At Tim's, there is usually room for 3-4 cars between the order mic and the pay/receive window so you just ask to tack on the order behind you. Other people have ordered a GC and left it there to be used until it runs out. My cousin used to work at a Tim's. She said their record was over 40 drivers paying for the person behind them before someone just said thanks and drove off. Lots will get their order paid for and then pay for the car behind them too

Wasn't it a Tim's that was in the news a bunch like a year ago because some guy came in and bought $1,000 cups of coffee so that all the customers all day could get free coffee?

kaitlynmichelle · March 2015

@novella1186 There was a town in southern Ontario where that happened maybe a year or two ago - he paid $2000 and they used it until it ran out for coffees. It was hilarious to me since I recognized him and it was my step sister's husband that did it. I was all wait... I know him! I think it was also a slight promotion for his business since it wasn't anonymous.

kaitlynmichelle · March 2015

I remembered a failed ROAK I did once! I worked at a bookstore and we got $10 GCs to hand out as we wanted. This one woman seemed to be having a rough day so I gave her one to cover her book and she didn't seem to get it. I explained it was a ROAK and to pay it forward. She seemed to be more annoyed than grateful and didn't even thank me.

novella1186 · March 2015

kaitlynmichelle said:
I remembered a failed ROAK I did once! I worked at a bookstore and we got $10 GCs to hand out as we wanted. This one woman seemed to be having a rough day so I gave her one to cover her book and she didn't seem to get it. I explained it was a ROAK and to pay it forward. She seemed to be more annoyed than grateful and didn't even thank me.

Wow what a bitch! That happened to me once too. I was a hostess at a restaurant and the manager gave me a huge bucket of pink carnations to hand out to all the moms who came in that day cuz it was Mother's Day. There was a pregnant lady who owned a business in our building and she came in to pick up lunch.

I said "I know you're not a mom just yet but Happy Mother's Day!" all excited and handed her a flower. She looked at it with the most disgusted expression on her face, backed away and said, "I don't want that." Then grabbed her food and walked out. Oh well.

arrippa · March 2015

thisismynickname said:
These are great stories!

A couple weeks ago DH and I were walking home from the gym. It had snowed on top of snow and ice a few days before, and I noticed that the US Postal Service truck was stuck on the corner. I slowed down and watched the back wheels spin. I pointed it out to DH and we approached the guy and asked if he needed a shove.
Me being a weakling and ineffective, the mailman hopped out and pushed with DH while I worked the gas pedal. Another guy saw their efforts and joined in. We got the guy out!
He was SO happy and shook our hands. Apparently he had been stuck for about a half hour! I'm actually sad that no one else noticed and helped before then.

Two stories

Mine is sort of similar, I was digging out my car during a snow storm when I heard a car engine revving. A car was stuck on the corner of my street in a big pile of snow. Since I already had my shovel, I just started digging her car out,. It took awhile but we managed to get the car out.

I use to drive a manual car that I hated. One time, I parked it on a hill in front of my friends house. Someone parked a car one inch from the front of my car. When I discovered that. I had a panic attack. There was no way I was getting my car out from a hill without hitting that car. It was 10:00 pm at night and I knocked on the neighbors door, in the off chance that it was his car. It wasn't but he offered to move my car without hitting the car. This stranger goes outside in his pjs and moves my car without any damage to any car.

Dreamergirl8812 · March 2015

novella1186 said:

kaitlynmichelle said:
I remembered a failed ROAK I did once! I worked at a bookstore and we got $10 GCs to hand out as we wanted. This one woman seemed to be having a rough day so I gave her one to cover her book and she didn't seem to get it. I explained it was a ROAK and to pay it forward. She seemed to be more annoyed than grateful and didn't even thank me.
Wow what a bitch! That happened to me once too. I was a hostess at a restaurant and the manager gave me a huge bucket of pink carnations to hand out to all the moms who came in that day cuz it was Mother's Day. There was a pregnant lady who owned a business in our building and she came in to pick up lunch.

I said "I know you're not a mom just yet but Happy Mother's Day!" all excited and handed her a flower. She looked at it with the most disgusted expression on her face, backed away and said, "I don't want that." Then grabbed her food and walked out. Oh well.

I think there's an entire thread in Etiquette that may explain that.

[Deleted User] · March 2015

I have paid for people's food behind me- even cashiers really get into it. I have ordered extra food when at a restaurant and given it to the homeless; I've found myself living on Ramen (and not just in a "college" kind of way) so I know what it's like to be hungry. I try to donate toiletries and such for "food" drives and the volunteers get so jazzed. I also keep a 10-ride train ticket on me and have the conductor punch it when fellow riders forget their passes, etc.

novella1186 · March 2015

Dreamergirl8812 said:

novella1186 said:

kaitlynmichelle said:
I remembered a failed ROAK I did once! I worked at a bookstore and we got $10 GCs to hand out as we wanted. This one woman seemed to be having a rough day so I gave her one to cover her book and she didn't seem to get it. I explained it was a ROAK and to pay it forward. She seemed to be more annoyed than grateful and didn't even thank me.
Wow what a bitch! That happened to me once too. I was a hostess at a restaurant and the manager gave me a huge bucket of pink carnations to hand out to all the moms who came in that day cuz it was Mother's Day. There was a pregnant lady who owned a business in our building and she came in to pick up lunch.

I said "I know you're not a mom just yet but Happy Mother's Day!" all excited and handed her a flower. She looked at it with the most disgusted expression on her face, backed away and said, "I don't want that." Then grabbed her food and walked out. Oh well.
I think there's an entire thread in Etiquette that may explain that.

lol no she and her husband were friends with all us restaurant people cuz they picked up lunch from us all the time. She was most definitely pregnant. Like REALLY pregnant. We even pitched in to get them a baby gift. So no, it wasn't that.

charcoalandblush · March 2015

Two that come to mind for me.

I went to college in the south, and it hardly ever snows. When it does, we don't know what to do. It snowed exactly twice when I was in college, and once was senior year when I had a car on campus. I was parked in one hour parallel parking (don't remember what I was doing, in class probably) and a bunch of snow had packed up on the side of my car facing the road. I couldn't pull out of the spot to save my life. A couple was walking down the sidewalk and asked if I needed help. They both pushed while I steered, and we got my car out!

The other: The night after the bar exam was over, DF and I went to a really nice steakhouse to celebrate me being done. We were about to finish our meals when the waiter came over and told us that someone wanted to send over two glasses of champagne if we would accept them. Of course we said yes. DF was DBF at the time, we had just been ring shopping together 2 months before so I honestly thought it was a proposal. When the champagne came over, DF asked the waiter who sent it. About halfway through our dinner, a really large loud-ish party had been seated right next to our cozy two person date-table. I guess they were worried they were bothering us on our nice date (they weren't) and sent us the champagne. I just thought it was such a sweet and thoughtful gesture.

One that I did - my junior year I was president of my sorority. The monday before Thanksgiving, we had a big thanksgiving dinner - turkey, stuffing, rolls, and green bean casserole from our local grocery store. The night of the dinner I got totally frazzled and crazy busy and didn't even have time to cook the second turkey we bought. I didn't want it to go to waste, so I called the local women's shelter and asked if they could use it. They said of course, so I dropped it off with a couple packs of rolls that were left over and some canned veggies from my pantry.

FiancB · March 2015

I used to work as a host at Applebee's, basically in the arctic, and I had to shovel snow pretty frequently. Some guys at the bar saw me doing this and insisted I let them do it instead. I said I didn't think that was a good idea (hand them my shovel? idk sounds like a liability or some weird stuff), but thank you. They happened to have a couple shovels in the back of one of their trucks so they went out and did it anyway, got it done in about 5 minutes.

It was sort of sexist since they were saying they'd never expect their girlfriends to do that and that one of the kitchen guys should be sent out to do it, but whatever. It was nice and came from a good place. And it is weird that they expect the host to look nice but also to go out and get covered in snow.

A long time ago I heard a quote from Mark Twain saying "I can live for two months on a good compliment" and it made me think about how when I get one it really does give me warm fuzzies for quite a while. So I made it a goal to find a reason to compliment someone every day. I haven't done that in a while, I should. And it's free!

I always thought the #1 thing I want to do if I ever have a decent income is more of stuff like what's in this thread. Leaving $100 tips for servers and things like that. The most fun you can ever have with money is giving it away.

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