So right now I have my two sisters and FIs sister as BMs. I also plan to ask my two best girlfriends here in NYC to be BMs. I have two other very close friends, my best friend from middle/high school and my college roommate, but neither of them live nearby. Both of them are in financial hardship, college roomie is expecting her first baby this summer and bought a house earlier this year, and middle school friend is not financially stable. I was also in roomie's wedding last summer.
So my dilemma is, do I ask them out of courtesy because they are such close friends, even though I know financially it would be very hard. Or do I not and risk hurting their feelings in order to prevent them from the financial burden? I'm worried that they will say yes but I don't want to add all those extra costs, especially since it would already require airfare, hotel, etc in NY just to attend the wedding.
When roomie asked me to be a BM she prefaced it with I know it's hard because you don't live here you can say no. But again, I felt like it was my duty as her friend to say yes and be there as a BM. But, I also was unable to participate in any BM activities since I wasn't local.
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this?