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A shower via mail? I don't even know what to call this one

I have to post about this because I've never seen it on TK before (granted I've been here less than a year, so maybe it has been around in the past). It seems like a whole new level of rude to me. Or just total nonsense.

Today after work we got a shower invite for.... wait for it.... BRAD. And Miss Crazypants.

It was sent from Brad's mom, who lives across the country. The top said "You are invited to a wedding shower for the bride and groom!"

But then it said, "in lieu of gifts, feel free to send gift cards, or mail gift"
So I'm thinking, "Why is there all this stuff about mailing and sending? I'd rather just bring my gift to the shower..."

Then it said gifts MUST arrive to [MOG's address across the country] by x date. So ok... maybe the shower is on the other side of the country and she assumes we won't be able to travel out there so we have the option of sending a gift out to them? Which seems odd, because Brad and Crazypants live here.

But I get to the bottom of the "invite" and it explains that the MOG will be bringing all gift cards and money to the bride and groom when she visits them in a few months. And there's no actual shower. So.... we're invited to a shower that isn't happening. So.... actually we're invited to send money to the MOG so she can then give the money to her son and his fiance.... ???

FI isn't even big on etiquette and he was like "WTF is this bullshit? They're asking for MORE money? No. We're not sending shit. We already have to spend enough money on the fucking cash bar at their wedding." lol this is true...

I guess we know that the rude apple sure doesn't fall far from the rude tree. Lol has anyone seen such a thing before?! I'm both annoyed and can't stop laughing.
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Re: A shower via mail? I don't even know what to call this one

  • I wish I was good at finding gifs, cause there are so many going through my mind right now. This is one of the most ridiculous things I've seen on this website, or anywhere ha.
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  • FiancBFiancB member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited March 2015
    Ruh roh. Someone doesn't have anyone to host for them but dammit, they still need MOAR GIFTS! Just don't expect anyone to feed or entertain the gift givers. Le gasp. 

    I sort of get the long distance thing, but I am long distance from my friends and family. Guess what- I didn't have a shower. And I didn't die. People did send me long distance WEDDING gifts. 
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  • No way someone has the audacity to do that....

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    I'm sure the wedding will be, uh, lovely. Complete with cash bar, a 3 hour gap, 20 spotlight dances including a dollar dance, and ends with everyone faking a grand exit so they can have sparkler pictures. Now you must go just to find out how true that is. 


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  • Tacky tacky tacky!

    To me, this is no different from pyramid-scam saleswomen who invite you to a "virtual party" on Facebook to buy their shit. 
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  • I think the part that gets me the most (besides all of it) is that the very first line on the invite said "you're invited to a shower!" But no I'm not, cuz there isn't one.
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  • JFC. That is so tacky. I really hope no one sends anything.


  • novella1186 said:I think the part that gets me the most (besides all of it) is that the very first line on the invite said "you're invited to a shower!" But no I'm not, cuz there isn't one.


    that's because she couldn't find a
    polite way to say, "PLEASE SEND ME MONEY!!" on Google or Pinterest. 
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  • I'm dying right now. It might be the beer but holy shit. This is out of control. I'd love to hear the reasoning that makes this okay to them. PLEASE ASK. I want to know.

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  • I'm honestly starting to wonder if we're gonna be served any food at the wedding, or if they're gonna swipe our credit cards at the door, or.... ?
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  • My friend last year had s virtual shower as they live across the country and other friends and family are spread apart. I thought it was a bit weird but at least those were being sent to the couple and not some random person, never mind the couple didn't live nearby. Yours is just weird
  • At the very least, they could've put forth the effort to plan a time for everyone to log onto skype or something and watch them open the gifts that are being demanded...
  • GROSS. I don't even understand the logic behind this. In what world does it make sense to send gifts to the MOG so she can drag them across the country to where the couple lives. Besides the whole not-actually-a-shower thing, why wouldn't you just send the gifts directly to them?!
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  • littlepep said:

    GROSS. I don't even understand the logic behind this. In what world does it make sense to send gifts to the MOG so she can drag them across the country to where the couple lives. Besides the whole not-actually-a-shower thing, why wouldn't you just send the gifts directly to them?!

    Yeah that's what I kept thinking... if people actually send boxed gifts, she then has to haul them across the country, to here, after people here paid to ship them out there... Ugh. Not a lot of common sense here. Not to mention, as FI puts it, not a lot of "couth" (he means uncouth).
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  • kvruns said:

    Buy something super heavy that qualifies with free shipping from somewhere. See what she does with that

    Yes, a cast iron skillet or dutch oven. That's probably too nice for these assholes though.
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  • labrolabro member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    They'll probably have their wedding via mail too. Just send your checks by x date and enjoy a special meal (on your own tab) the day of the wedding to celebrate the couple!



  • kvruns said:

    Buy something super heavy that qualifies with free shipping from somewhere. See what she does with that

    Yes, a cast iron skillet or dutch oven. That's probably too nice for these assholes though.
    I got my first shower gift today, which was a safe.  It's a small one, but that shit was heavy!

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  • As DH would say, vagina pancake!!!
     
    (rough translation: what the ever-loving fuck)



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  • jacques27 said:

    Do you think you could get everyone "invited" to go in together and come up with $24,000?  Amazon has an 8,514 pound lathe and it qualifies for free shipping. 

    OMG. I am dying! YASSSSSS!
  • I remember reading in the archives on etiquette hell about a shower (baby or wedding can't recall) that was also across the country. In the days before skype, the hostess was demanding gifts be sent, and the giver would receive a photo of the guest of honor opening the gift. Oh, and the gift was on top of a contribution to some sort of savings account. the storyteller declined to get involved in the tack fest.

    I think you should send a years supply of hemmroid cream to the mom. Make sure it's labeled for her enjoyment not Brad's.

  • But then it said, "in lieu of gifts, feel free to send gift cards, or mail gift" 

    This part is hilarious to me.  Me thinks someone does not understand what "in lieu of" means.

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