Chit Chat

30 Days *Calling All OMHs*

loveislouderloveislouder member
First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
edited March 2015 in Chit Chat
I'm at 30 days out ladies and gentlemen and I'm freaking out (in a good-ish way)

I've read over my checklists but those of you with experience (or just those of you who are smarter than me) what are some things that I may be forgetting or things that you wish you would have thought of.

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Re: 30 Days *Calling All OMHs*

  • I am pretty sure I blocked the last 30 days wedding panic from my mind.

    Make sure your payments are either taken care of or you have a plan for how it's getting taken care of (write out a check, who is responsible for giving said vendor that check, etc)

    If you have space, start putting things together as you remember them. I forgot my written vows, and end up having to dictate from memory to my MOH as I was getting my makeup done day of. Don't do that.

    Have a glass of wine. Or a bottle.
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    Anniversary
  • We're supposed to send a copy of our vows and readings to our officiant. I may also give a copy to my best friend (BM) or something, *just in case. 

    FSIL told me to make sure I -- or someone-- have cash on hand to tip people, like the trolley driver who's doing guest transportation. 
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  • WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited March 2015
    We did a DW, no coordinator, so some of this might not apply, but I think it's still good.  

    Put all of your payments (cash ones) left to be paid on the day of in separate envelopes, labelled, so all you have to do is pull them out and pay vendors.  Include tips there too. 

    I also planned a countdown for DH for the month of March (we got married at the end of March).  I gave him a little something every day that he would need for our trip, kind of like an advent calendar.  Stuff like a magazine or pack of gum for the plane.  Coconut flavoured soap, luggage tags, etc.  

    Do a final confirmation with all of your vendors, to ensure they're all good to show up at the right time and with what you need.  

  • Those are all great ideas guys, thanks!
  • I think I saw on somebody else's post somewhere about getting together the timeline to give your people, and for yourself to keep everything on track (of course things run over and get messy).  I also started a piece of paper writing down everything that we need to take to the venue, and I as I remember stuff, I jot it down in there.  I need a checklist of stuff so nothing gets left behind! 
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  • In my state at 30 days out it would be just about time to go and get that marriage license (marriage license is good for 30 days from issuance, so you'd do it when you are less than 30 days out). 
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  • Where are all my OMHs at?
  • Where are all my OMHs at?

    Maybe you should clarify the title to draw them in. Other threads with count-downs and specific wedding dates have been more along the lines of "other people getting married the same weekend as me, what are you up to right now? Let's chat about our specific date!" which is what I thought this thread would be. So maybe they're avoiding it because they think it's like that?
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  • Where are all my OMHs at?

    Maybe you should clarify the title to draw them in. Other threads with count-downs and specific wedding dates have been more along the lines of "other people getting married the same weekend as me, what are you up to right now? Let's chat about our specific date!" which is what I thought this thread would be. So maybe they're avoiding it because they think it's like that?
    I figured most of us where busy with the two engagement ring and passing gas threads.
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    Anniversary
  • 30 days out, I was collecting RSVPs and logging them. One week out, I was finishing up the seating chart to send to the venue/catering manager.

    A few days out, I was making piles of things to take to the hotel, to the venue, etc. 

    I think this varies widely by the simplicity or level of complication of your wedding. I had just four vendors who were totally on top of everything, all bridal party members had their attire, and things were actually easy peasy. 

    Drink more wine! Yum 
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  • Take care of yourself - your body, your mind - and get plenty of sleep!  :)
  • edited March 2015
    The OMH brought me in. :)

    I'm a list maker, so it helped me to make a list of things that needed to get done. Lists of who needed to get paid. Lists things I wanted with me the day of. Lists of final logistics phone calls I needed to make. Then prioritizing, delegating to DH, delegating to our DOC, and putting things into a timing order that made sense.... and crossing things off. 

    If I remember right, the only things that needed doing in the last 30 days were:

    - following up on RSVPs
    - final phone calls (confirming stuff) with vendors
    - writing final payment checks
    - figuring out who to tip and how much, then going to ATM for extra cash in case they were awesome
    - giving a final timeline and guidance to our DOC
    - giving a final table layout to our reception venue coordinator (and applicable vendors - DJ, caterer, photo booth vendor and DOC - to make sure everyone got the same document and was on the same page)
    - making our cake
    - buying last minute stuff (this was 100% because I didn't take care of it sooner)
    - DIYing last minute stuff (also 100% because I didn't do it sooner)

    ETA: and also packing my bag for the day of and putting stuff in labeled boxes (e.g. "reception venue DIY stuff" with instructions for coordinator, "bathroom baskets", etc.).
    *********************************************************************************

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  • My wedding was super intimate, so my experience is pretty atypical.

    But for me, I addressed all of our announcements (which also meant that I had to collect address a bit before that even).

    As for stuff I did to get ready the day-of...well...not much. We just hung out really. Everything went super smoothly. I was still super anxious and stressed though, it's just normal.

  • I honestly couldn't tell you what I was doing at 30 days out lol
  • I honestly couldn't tell you what I was doing at 30 days out lol

    Yeah, ditto this. But I had a pretty small wedding and wasn't super into planning (thank you, retired project manager mother who gets off on shit like details and was more than happy to lead that charge). I can tell you the stuff that went "wrong" &/or fell through the cracks were incredibly insignificant. Just focus on the big things: make sure you & FI are clothed (or not, if you're into the whole nudist thing), you've got your marriage license, and everything is set to provide for a proper hosting for your guests. And breath. Definitely don't forget to breath.
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  • Ummmm... apparently blocked from my memory too. Most of my craziness came about 3-4 days out. 30 I was cool as a cucumber.

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  • I was...drinking probably...eating....Halloween happened....

    Fuck I should know this. Honestly by the end I was pretty chill like "Meh, whatever happens happens". 

    OH! I was celebrating cause my state legalized it! That happened in the 30 days out window, so there was cancelling of the trip to CA to leaglize it cause that would redundant. 
  • MagicInk said:

    OH! I was celebrating cause my state legalized it! That happened in the 30 days out window, so there was cancelling of the trip to CA to leaglize it cause that would redundant. 

    No sweetie, that's called a PPD, and everyone does it, DUH.
  • I also cannot remember what I was doing 30 days out. I made a lot of lists. That helped.
  • If you have any DIY projects on the list, start working on them now! Don't wait too long - I ended up pushing some of mine off for so long, I was doing them the day before the wedding... not the wisest plan :-)
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  • At one month out the major things I did were:
    • Finalize ceremony readings and provide copies to the minister and readers
    • Finalize ceremony music
    • Make menus
    • Give photographer a list of what/whom would be involved in formal portraits
    • Give DJ do not play list, song requests, and songs for special dances, and tosses
    • Confirm hair, makeup, and nail appointments
    • Wrap wedding party gifts
    • Pick up wedding bands

    At one week out:

    • Finalize seating chart
    • Make place cards and table numbers
    • Confirm all arrangements with vendors (include paying them)
    • Informing venue of vendor delivery/set-up times and their contact info
    • Finalize the day-of schedule
    • Final dress fitting

    At three days out:

    • Give reception final head count
    • Drop off supplies to venue (place cards, table numbers, favours, etc.)
    • Provide vendors with day of phone number
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  • Definitely make sure your officiant has the entire script and not just his/her portion. My maid of honor spent the whole day with me getting hair done and running around then when it was time for the ceremony she was like "uuum shit I don't have my reading". Thank God my friend who was the officiant had put the entire thing on index cards that she passed along at the time of the reading! 

                                                                     

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  • MagicInk said:

    OH! I was celebrating cause my state legalized it! That happened in the 30 days out window, so there was cancelling of the trip to CA to leaglize it cause that would redundant. 

    No sweetie, that's called a PPD, and everyone does it, DUH.
    Playa please my PPD is gonna be huge! I'm thinking of renting out times square.
  • FiancBFiancB member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited March 2015
    30 days out was super crazy for me, but not just because of the wedding- we also moved 4 hours less than 30 days out so we were doing that and unpacking, and planning a last minute honeymoon, and meeting with vendors, and doing some DIY projects, and buying last minute things we forgot like a guestbook (which wasn't even worth it because one person signed it. Ugh, I don't even want to think about it.

    So I guess the obvious is, don't procrastinate and don't take on too much.  I bought most of the decorations in that week, did name cards a few days before, and I finished making my paper flowers at about 1 am the night before the wedding. Yeah.  I feel like I'm in the "I'm the Robe Lowe that makes poor decisions" commercials.  

    It's 30 days; at this point what's done is done and it's better to just relax as much as you can. 
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  • I made sure to not only give a copy of my vows and reading to our officiant, I also emailed them to myself so that if worst came to worst, I would still be able to find everything.

    I'm sure everyone else was much more organized than I was, but the day of my wedding was nuts.  The salon we went to didn't budget enough time for all of us, so although we were supposed to be ready by 1, two bridesmaids, my sister, and my mom weren't finished until 2.  Our pictures were supposed to begin at 1:30.  Turns out the salon only had one person who was any good at make-up, but they didn't schedule her to do the make-up.  They had her doing hair instead while people waited around for her to finish.

    I think my dumbest decision was to walk out the door without my suitcase.  I didn't realize until we got to the ceremony location that I was missing it, and we lived 30 minutes away from where we were getting married.  Don't do what I did--NO BLACK UNDERWEAR when you get dressed in the morning.  Don't do it.  I couldn't get dressed because 1) black underwear shows through white dresses and 2) commando doesn't always work if your dress is more sheer than you'd realized in the daylight.  Thankfully my MOH's husband didn't plan on coming until closer to the ceremony, so he brought my suitcase with all the necessaries in it.  It put us way behind on taking our pre-ceremony pictures.
  • 30 days from my wedding I was dealing with mortgage paperwork because we bought our house 2 weeks before our wedding. Wedding wasn't even on the radar at that point. 

     2 weeks before it was finalizing the counts, making seating chart, contacting the coordinator to pay the final bill. I had minimal DIY (programs and escort cards were the only thing I did myself). That was done the week of the wedding.
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  • @nymeru black undies! hahah. My best friend helped me into my dress and she immediately started screaming "Why the fuck are you wearing hot pink underwear?!?! It's showing through!!!" I was like dude chill- grab the nude thong out of my bag. lol

                                                                     

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  • 30 days out was not stressful.  Our wedding was OOT and we left a week before the wedding.   Most of the stuff were sent to my parent's or sisters.  So I didn't have to really remember much.  

    Our RSVPs were not due until 10 days out (which was 3 days before we arrived in the states).  As RSVPs came in we tweaked then seating plan.  Then when we got to my sister's house we just printed them out and tied them to the starfish.   Of course we had some last minute cancellations so even those were tweaked up until the day off the wedding.

    I had already had the timeline and welcome cards for the OOT bags already created.  I just needed to run to Staples to get them printed and cut.   My parents had bought most of the OOT bag stuff so all we had to do was fill them up a few days before the wedding.

    We went to 2 weddings that month.  

    Now that I think about it.  30 days out wasn't a big deal.  I was busier the last 7 days just putting everything together.   It helped that I has off those days, but even then my time was not consumed with wedding stuff.   We went to a few labor day parties, out to dinner or lunch with various friends and family every night.  DH went golfing twice.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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