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Hmmm first one I was ever in I was 28 and had no clue how anything worked so I just went with the flow of the other girls. I got invoiced my portion for the bachelorette limo but other than that it was totally fine, especially the bride.
Second one was my brother's. I had started coming on here so I learned a little more about it's ok to speak up if you have a budget, you don't have to just go along with things. So I told her my dress budget was $130. She said well my friends already picked this one that you have to get- it's $200. uuuugh got it only because it's my brother. Then she took us shoe shopping and said get anything in the store. So I come back with these awesome grey pumps that I can totally wear again to work. She says "No they must be champagne". I'm like bitch, you said anything....there are only 2 shoes in the whole store which are champagne...fuck those were uncomfortable. I told her best friend that my contribution to the shower could be no more than $100. The girl invoiced me $130 on the spot at the shower. So apparently telling people your budget means nothing!
Then the one I am currently MOH in, bride is being very cool. She bought the dress and shoes. She doesn't want a shower but she's making us go to her Jack & Jill, which I told her how terrible they are but she knows and doesn't care. Whatever, at least I don't have to contribute to the food or anything I just have to show up.
lolo883 said:I've never been asked for a dress budget. TK was the first I'd ever heard of that.
I've never been asked for a dress budget. TK was the first I'd ever heard of that.
I've spoken of this wedding before. It wasn't so much the bride as her mom. She was a 100% Momzilla. First, she owned her own business in an expensive town. She had many grand schemes for this wedding, but trickled the cost down to the BMs.
She dictated the shower. It had to be at a restaurant. I asked about having it in a hall where you can bring in your own food and MOB scoffed at that. Saying "My family does not have showers in halls!" I offered to bake the cake for the shower (I have the skill set to do it.) The look of horror on her face at the thought of a home baked cake! I successfully won that battle, but afterwards supposedly the FI was aghast that bride would not get the cake she really wanted! It was a cannoli cake, which I can make! So he offered to pay for the cake. Me and other BMs don't believe this story and it was just MOB's way of getting the cake she wanted. Turns out bride didn't care for cannoli cake all that much.
One of the BMs was from KY and not coming up for the shower. Even though MOB invoiced her, she refused to pay. We made it clear to MOB that we wouldn't be picking up this BM's portion. But when the shower occurred, our invoiced portion was higher by the exact percentage to absorb KY BM's portion. I should have written a check for the initial amount I was told, but I was naïve. Also, 2 BMs were brides sisters, they were not invoiced for the shower. It was split 5 ways instead of 7.
Day of wedding, (ETA) no booze of any kind at their house while getting ready. Not even champagne! Damn, I needed booze to get through that day! Right before we arrived, MOB sent back all of our bouquet's because they weren't right. Now this florist was not around the corner, they were a 30-45 minute trip one way. We needed to board the trolley to go to the church. So we go, still no flowers. MOB insists we cannot start the ceremony until our bouquets arrive. So we sit outside of the church in the trolley. There is light conversation. We start spying the priest at the doors of the church, giving us the eye as to why aren't we starting. FOB comes out and says we need to start. MOB says no, not until the flowers arrive. About 10 minutes later, FOB comes back and says we need to start now because the wedding will be cutting into regularly scheduled confession. MOB goes "CONFESSION CAN WAIT!!!!" Silence fell over the trolley and no one said another word. Another few minutes goes by and FOB comes back and says if we don't start now, he is not performing the ceremony. So out of the trolley we go and line up in the back. Literally the first BM is to start walking down the aisle and the florist bursts in the back door! I grab that BM and tell her to wait. Give her a bouquet and off she goes.
Bride is overjoyed the bouquets have shown up. She asks, how do the BM ones look? Brides sister goes "They look like crap." Best thing to tell a neurotic bride! At least MOB wasn't there at this time because she probably would have sent them back again!
Ceremony goes off fine. No pictures in the church because confession is starting. Load up the trolley and THANK GOD the GM are sharing their flasks! We stop somewhere and get pictures. Then we head to the reception venue. I just want to go grab a drink but am repeatedly told we are still going to get more pictures. In the time we are waiting for everyone to gather, I could have gotten a drink. I was annoyed. Then we go out to the golf course and photog wants us to hold hands with our GM partners - uh what? I don't know this guy! As soon as photog says he is done with BP, I'm off to the cocktail hour. And H (BF at time) already has a drink waiting for me! Knew he was a keeper even back then!
The only good thing that came out of this is that it taught me to stand up for myself and my budget. Next wedding, MOH tried to invoice me and I gave her a big Nope! Myself and the other BMs are all no longer friends with this bride. She all thinks its our fault that we are not friends anymore. 1 person maybe, but when 3 friends phased you all out of your life - you need to do some self-reflecting.