Chit Chat

Things that are meant to be a compliment but aren't...

1235

Re: Things that are meant to be a compliment but aren't...

  • I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    image
    [Deleted User]
  • My mom is very well known for doing this...My mom told me that she wouldn't worry about me getting beat up if I was a boy. She said "You're a big girl so you would have been a sturdy boy!" Our waitress literally gasped when she hear my mom say it. I know that she just meant I'm tall for a girl so if I was boy I would have been tall for a boy to. Haha. 

    She is also famous for saying "You look like no one loves you" when you have something she feels needs fixed, such as- "Go put a little make-up on your face. You look like no one loves you." or "You can't wear that dress with those shoes. You look like no one loves you." She means the best but she just has a terrible way of saying it. I think living with her my whole life has made me really try to graciously accept compliments even when they are poorly phrased. :)
    emmaaa
  • FutureMrsN3312FutureMrsN3312 Dirty Jersey member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    "You don't look pregnant from behind"  

    "You're filling out your maternity clothes nicely"

    "Your ass looks good for being pregnant"
     
    Pregnancy Ticker
    emmaaa
  • ...I am actually okay with being called kiddo, honey, etc. Possibly because I'm likely to be a person calling people kiddo, honey, etc myself, but also Bossman does it, and he does it to EVERYONE. One of the judges is "Judge Princess". He is indiscriminate with the pet names, and I think that makes it not as bad FOR ME.


    Random dudebros on the street? Call me honey, kiss the pavement. Bossman? Eh...

    I do feel like I need to apologize to the people who don't like being called those things, though, since I'm really bad about using pet names like that with people, so: I'm sorry! If I'm calling you a stupid "generic" pet name, it's only cus I like you and am a dodobird with expressing that I like people who are not SOs (and kind of even people who ARE SOs) so it's my best way of expressing affection for those people.
    I guess my anger over being called pet names is slightly complicated. For example, if a little old lady does it, or someone who is saying it sweetly does it, I don't mind. But, usually I hear it in a condescending/predatory way, so then I REALLY mind.
  • littlepeplittlepep South Carolina member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    abcdevonn said:

    ...I am actually okay with being called kiddo, honey, etc. Possibly because I'm likely to be a person calling people kiddo, honey, etc myself, but also Bossman does it, and he does it to EVERYONE. One of the judges is "Judge Princess". He is indiscriminate with the pet names, and I think that makes it not as bad FOR ME.


    Random dudebros on the street? Call me honey, kiss the pavement. Bossman? Eh...

    I do feel like I need to apologize to the people who don't like being called those things, though, since I'm really bad about using pet names like that with people, so: I'm sorry! If I'm calling you a stupid "generic" pet name, it's only cus I like you and am a dodobird with expressing that I like people who are not SOs (and kind of even people who ARE SOs) so it's my best way of expressing affection for those people.
    I guess my anger over being called pet names is slightly complicated. For example, if a little old lady does it, or someone who is saying it sweetly does it, I don't mind. But, usually I hear it in a condescending/predatory way, so then I REALLY mind.
    Yeah I agree with this. If it's a sweet little old lady, I know it's not meant in a condescending way. But a guy at work calling me sweetheart? 

    image
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
    [Deleted User]bethsmiles
  • KatieinBklnKatieinBkln (NO SLEEP TIL) Brooklyn! member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer First Anniversary
    I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    Laughing because we always pounce on that when it's pulled out as an excuse for bad wedding etiquette.

    BUT. I do think it's more common to be called "hon/sweetie/etc." by certain people in the south. Like, a diner waitress in NY might go so far as to not glare at you, but her equivalent in SC would probably call me "hon." 

    I also find that older women are the most likely to give me the pet name treatment. Usually it's sweet and kindly meant, I think. But yeah, no dudes get to call me pet names. Whenever someone does in a non-work, public (and therefore fleeting) setting, I'm always annoyed, but not really in the mood to call someone out. 

    *Actually, the older man I worked with in the college library back in the day called me "hon." But he called everyone hun, so I just took it as "older Brooklyn dude who is certainly harmless." I guess it depends on the context.
    image
    This baby knows exactly how I feel
    emmaaa[Deleted User]littlepepprincessgracekelly
  • emmaaaemmaaa North Carolina mod
    Moderator 2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary

    I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    Laughing because we always pounce on that when it's pulled out as an excuse for bad wedding etiquette.

    BUT. I do think it's more common to be called "hon/sweetie/etc." by certain people in the south. Like, a diner waitress in NY might go so far as to not glare at you, but her equivalent in SC would probably call me "hon." 

    I also find that older women are the most likely to give me the pet name treatment. Usually it's sweet and kindly meant, I think. But yeah, no dudes get to call me pet names. Whenever someone does in a non-work, public (and therefore fleeting) setting, I'm always annoyed, but not really in the mood to call someone out. 

    *Actually, the older man I worked with in the college library back in the day called me "hon." But he called everyone hun, so I just took it as "older Brooklyn dude who is certainly harmless." I guess it depends on the context.


    Yeah I do think it may be regional. I use to wait tables and constantly called people, hon, honey, sweetie, dear.

    Again, I don't sarcastically call people that. It's just habit. Sorry, not sorry.

  • KatieinBklnKatieinBkln (NO SLEEP TIL) Brooklyn! member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer First Anniversary
    emmaaa said:

    I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    Laughing because we always pounce on that when it's pulled out as an excuse for bad wedding etiquette.

    BUT. I do think it's more common to be called "hon/sweetie/etc." by certain people in the south. Like, a diner waitress in NY might go so far as to not glare at you, but her equivalent in SC would probably call me "hon." 

    I also find that older women are the most likely to give me the pet name treatment. Usually it's sweet and kindly meant, I think. But yeah, no dudes get to call me pet names. Whenever someone does in a non-work, public (and therefore fleeting) setting, I'm always annoyed, but not really in the mood to call someone out. 

    *Actually, the older man I worked with in the college library back in the day called me "hon." But he called everyone hun, so I just took it as "older Brooklyn dude who is certainly harmless." I guess it depends on the context.
    Yeah I do think it may be regional. I use to wait tables and constantly called people, hon, honey, sweetie, dear.

    Again, I don't sarcastically call people that. It's just habit. Sorry, not sorry.


    I totally called kids "hon" and "sweetie" when I was a lifeguard. The girls were usually "sweetie" and the boys were "buddy." (It seemed nicer than, HEY KID, STOP RUNNING!)
    image
    This baby knows exactly how I feel
    emmaaa
  • For years, everyone told me that I looked so young and that they could never believe my age. Once I hit 34, that slowed down a lot. It's not that I suddenly looked older, it's more that I stopped looking so incredibly young that it was worthy of comments. Or at least that's what my aunt says. While it's annoying, it's much more annoying when it stops.

    I've been told as a compliment that I don't look Jewish. That pisses me off. Not appearance-related but I was just asked if I didn't want to change my name because I didn't want to be mistaken for Mexican (besides DH's clearly Mexican last name, my first name is common in many languages). Clearly a post-racial society...

    One time I put a mezuzah up outside my dorm room. This girl who lived across the hall who was also super obnoxious asked what it was. I explained it to her and she said, "Oh, you don't look Jewish!" I proceeded to make her very uncomfortable by asking her what she meant by that.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

    image
    novella1186KatieinBklnkaitlynmichelle
  • littlepeplittlepep South Carolina member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer

    For years, everyone told me that I looked so young and that they could never believe my age. Once I hit 34, that slowed down a lot. It's not that I suddenly looked older, it's more that I stopped looking so incredibly young that it was worthy of comments. Or at least that's what my aunt says. While it's annoying, it's much more annoying when it stops.

    I've been told as a compliment that I don't look Jewish. That pisses me off. Not appearance-related but I was just asked if I didn't want to change my name because I didn't want to be mistaken for Mexican (besides DH's clearly Mexican last name, my first name is common in many languages). Clearly a post-racial society...

    One time I put a mezuzah up outside my dorm room. This girl who lived across the hall who was also super obnoxious asked what it was. I explained it to her and she said, "Oh, you don't look Jewish!" I proceeded to make her very uncomfortable by asking her what she meant by that.
    What does that shit even mean? Like CLEARLY all people of the same race look exactly the same. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • littlepep said:

    For years, everyone told me that I looked so young and that they could never believe my age. Once I hit 34, that slowed down a lot. It's not that I suddenly looked older, it's more that I stopped looking so incredibly young that it was worthy of comments. Or at least that's what my aunt says. While it's annoying, it's much more annoying when it stops.

    I've been told as a compliment that I don't look Jewish. That pisses me off. Not appearance-related but I was just asked if I didn't want to change my name because I didn't want to be mistaken for Mexican (besides DH's clearly Mexican last name, my first name is common in many languages). Clearly a post-racial society...

    One time I put a mezuzah up outside my dorm room. This girl who lived across the hall who was also super obnoxious asked what it was. I explained it to her and she said, "Oh, you don't look Jewish!" I proceeded to make her very uncomfortable by asking her what she meant by that.
    What does that shit even mean? Like CLEARLY all people of the same race look exactly the same. 
    I guess because my nose is small. That's what I've been told by other folks. Like it's a super awesome compliment.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

    image
  • For years, everyone told me that I looked so young and that they could never believe my age. Once I hit 34, that slowed down a lot. It's not that I suddenly looked older, it's more that I stopped looking so incredibly young that it was worthy of comments. Or at least that's what my aunt says. While it's annoying, it's much more annoying when it stops.

    I've been told as a compliment that I don't look Jewish. That pisses me off. Not appearance-related but I was just asked if I didn't want to change my name because I didn't want to be mistaken for Mexican (besides DH's clearly Mexican last name, my first name is common in many languages). Clearly a post-racial society...

    One time I put a mezuzah up outside my dorm room. This girl who lived across the hall who was also super obnoxious asked what it was. I explained it to her and she said, "Oh, you don't look Jewish!" I proceeded to make her very uncomfortable by asking her what she meant by that.
    Brad's crazypant's fiance found out I was Jewish the first time I met her. She said "How are you Jewish? You have blonde hair and blue eyes." Um.... ? I didn't know those were anti-Jewish traits. Maybe cuz they're not. 
    image
  • novella1186novella1186 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    edited April 2015
    As far as the pet names thing, it annoys me a lot but by far the worst was when I was in a job interview and at the end of it, the owner of the company complimented me on the way I look and called me sweetie. It was creepy and it really rubbed me the wrong way. I just kind of looked at him and walked out because it caught me so off-guard. 

    But wait it gets even better (while we're also on the subject of Jews in this thread). He offered me the job, I came in and met everyone, was shown my office, etc. He wasn't sure of my start date yet so he was going to call me the next day. 

    As I was leaving, he said something really religious about Christianity that confused me and I had no idea what to say to it, so-- being the awkward moron that I am-- I blurted out "I don't know, I'm Jewish." He revoked the job offer. 
    image
  • littlepeplittlepep South Carolina member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer

    As far as the pet names thing, it annoys me a lot but by far the worst was when I was in a job interview and at the end of it, the owner of the company complimented me on the way I look and called me sweetie. It was creepy and it really rubbed me the wrong way. I just kind of looked at him and walked out because it caught me so off-guard. 


    But wait it gets even better (while we're also on the subject of Jews in this thread). He offered me the job, I came in and met everyone, was shown my office, etc. He wasn't sure of my start date yet so he was going to call me the next day. 

    As I was leaving, he said something really religious about Christianity that confused me and I had no idea what to say to it, so-- being the awkward moron that I am-- I blurted out "I don't know, I'm Jewish." He revoked the job offer. 
    How is that legal???
    Exactly what I was thinking?? Can he even do that? I mean geez. You clearly wouldn't want to work for the dickwad, but that's definitely not ok. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • As far as the pet names thing, it annoys me a lot but by far the worst was when I was in a job interview and at the end of it, the owner of the company complimented me on the way I look and called me sweetie. It was creepy and it really rubbed me the wrong way. I just kind of looked at him and walked out because it caught me so off-guard. 


    But wait it gets even better (while we're also on the subject of Jews in this thread). He offered me the job, I came in and met everyone, was shown my office, etc. He wasn't sure of my start date yet so he was going to call me the next day. 

    As I was leaving, he said something really religious about Christianity that confused me and I had no idea what to say to it, so-- being the awkward moron that I am-- I blurted out "I don't know, I'm Jewish." He revoked the job offer. 
    How is that legal???
    Because there was no record of it so it was my word against his. 
    image
  • littlepeplittlepep South Carolina member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer


    I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    Laughing because we always pounce on that when it's pulled out as an excuse for bad wedding etiquette.

    BUT. I do think it's more common to be called "hon/sweetie/etc." by certain people in the south. Like, a diner waitress in NY might go so far as to not glare at you, but her equivalent in SC would probably call me "hon." 

    I also find that older women are the most likely to give me the pet name treatment. Usually it's sweet and kindly meant, I think. But yeah, no dudes get to call me pet names. Whenever someone does in a non-work, public (and therefore fleeting) setting, I'm always annoyed, but not really in the mood to call someone out. 

    *Actually, the older man I worked with in the college library back in the day called me "hon." But he called everyone hun, so I just took it as "older Brooklyn dude who is certainly harmless." I guess it depends on the context.



    In Georgia at least, all the aforementioned pet names are okay except for "dear." "Dear" is how you know a Southern woman just threw shade at you. Like this:image


    My favorite thing to say is "oh how interesting!" AKA WTF?

    "I'm going to have my flower girl carry one of those signs that says last chance to run; isn't that so cute!"

    Oh how interesting!

    image
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
    novella1186emmaaa[Deleted User]princessgracekelly
  • How bout hearing "god you're like a stick" While sitting there eating My McDonalds and shake. Thanks a lot for pointing out I have no curves. Woman at Walmart came up to me while I had my 1 month old and decided to lecture me on the importance of finishing high school before having babies. I get that I'm tiny so look like I've barely even reached puberty but really lady?
    emmaaa
  • lurkergirllurkergirl ATL member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    littlepep said:


    I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    Laughing because we always pounce on that when it's pulled out as an excuse for bad wedding etiquette.

    BUT. I do think it's more common to be called "hon/sweetie/etc." by certain people in the south. Like, a diner waitress in NY might go so far as to not glare at you, but her equivalent in SC would probably call me "hon." 

    I also find that older women are the most likely to give me the pet name treatment. Usually it's sweet and kindly meant, I think. But yeah, no dudes get to call me pet names. Whenever someone does in a non-work, public (and therefore fleeting) setting, I'm always annoyed, but not really in the mood to call someone out. 

    *Actually, the older man I worked with in the college library back in the day called me "hon." But he called everyone hun, so I just took it as "older Brooklyn dude who is certainly harmless." I guess it depends on the context.



    In Georgia at least, all the aforementioned pet names are okay except for "dear." "Dear" is how you know a Southern woman just threw shade at you. Like this:


    My favorite thing to say is "oh how interesting!" AKA WTF?

    "I'm going to have my flower girl carry one of those signs that says last chance to run; isn't that so cute!"

    Oh how interesting!




    Haha, my grandma does this, but instead of interesting, she says, "unique."  So, if I (or more likely my teen sister) show up in a trendy outfit, it's, "Oh, what a unique outfit."  She would never say anything actually mean, so she has to come up with nice ways to throw shade like the good southern lady she is :)

    @knottienumbers I used to get the baby comments as well, although I was a teen, it's just that the baby was my little sister.  It's unbelievable how much judgment came my way, mostly at the mall, but also at the park where other moms would whisper about me.  Like, no this baby is not mine, but even if she were, so what?  People can be such jerks.




    image
    emmaaa[Deleted User]littlepep[Deleted User]
  • So I've been trying to walk a little after meals, because it's supposed to be good for you. Yesterday after lunch I was walking around campus and the facilities guy, this super nice old dude, was driving in a golf cart and asked if I needed a ride. I told him I was walking because I just ate lunch and it's good for my digestion. He looked at me and said, "Well, fluttering, you look damn skinny to me," and drove away.

    At first I thought, "That was pretty sweet," but then I realized I hadn't said anything about my weight or walking to lose weight, lol. I wasn't mad or insulted but I just thought about how it's almost always assumed women are trying to improve their health purely to lose weight.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

    image
    emmaaa[Deleted User]littlepepthisismynickname2
  • anjemonanjemon Minnie and Paul (MN) member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper

    littlepep said:


    I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    Laughing because we always pounce on that when it's pulled out as an excuse for bad wedding etiquette.

    BUT. I do think it's more common to be called "hon/sweetie/etc." by certain people in the south. Like, a diner waitress in NY might go so far as to not glare at you, but her equivalent in SC would probably call me "hon." 

    I also find that older women are the most likely to give me the pet name treatment. Usually it's sweet and kindly meant, I think. But yeah, no dudes get to call me pet names. Whenever someone does in a non-work, public (and therefore fleeting) setting, I'm always annoyed, but not really in the mood to call someone out. 

    *Actually, the older man I worked with in the college library back in the day called me "hon." But he called everyone hun, so I just took it as "older Brooklyn dude who is certainly harmless." I guess it depends on the context.



    In Georgia at least, all the aforementioned pet names are okay except for "dear." "Dear" is how you know a Southern woman just threw shade at you. Like this:


    My favorite thing to say is "oh how interesting!" AKA WTF?

    "I'm going to have my flower girl carry one of those signs that says last chance to run; isn't that so cute!"

    Oh how interesting!


    Haha, my grandma does this, but instead of interesting, she says, "unique."  So, if I (or more likely my teen sister) show up in a trendy outfit, it's, "Oh, what a unique outfit."  She would never say anything actually mean, so she has to come up with nice ways to throw shade like the good southern lady she is :)

    @knottienumbers I used to get the baby comments as well, although I was a teen, it's just that the baby was my little sister.  It's unbelievable how much judgment came my way, mostly at the mall, but also at the park where other moms would whisper about me.  Like, no this baby is not mine, but even if she were, so what?  People can be such jerks.


    That was my MOH's experience too. Her parents had a baby right after we graduated college. She moved home for awhile to help take care of her brother. She said there are some people who firmly believed it was her kid and her parents were just covering for her. People can be so strange.
    image
  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I just remembered one that my coworker said to me the other day.  I decided to do my makeup differently, and I was trying to wear less and be more natural (not that I wear all that much to begin with).  My coworker looked at me and said, "Oh, I like the way you did your makeup.  Your face looks cleaner."  WTF is that supposed to mean?  Did it look dirty before?  She's actually a sweetheart and I know she didn't mean it in a negative way.  I'm like 99% sure she meant that it looked fresh and natural, which was what I was going for anyways, but the phrasing of it was off. 


    image
    emmaaa[Deleted User]
  • littlepeplittlepep South Carolina member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer

    littlepep said:


    I only use pet names for my patients... who are babies... maybe that's why they cry? I'm sure some of them don't appreciate being called pumpkin butt or my little fatty, or chunky monster.... buuuuuut oh well. 

    I don't think I've ever called an adult I'm not in a relationship with by a pet name. It just seems so bizarre to me. Do you guys think it's a regional thing?
    Laughing because we always pounce on that when it's pulled out as an excuse for bad wedding etiquette.

    BUT. I do think it's more common to be called "hon/sweetie/etc." by certain people in the south. Like, a diner waitress in NY might go so far as to not glare at you, but her equivalent in SC would probably call me "hon." 

    I also find that older women are the most likely to give me the pet name treatment. Usually it's sweet and kindly meant, I think. But yeah, no dudes get to call me pet names. Whenever someone does in a non-work, public (and therefore fleeting) setting, I'm always annoyed, but not really in the mood to call someone out. 

    *Actually, the older man I worked with in the college library back in the day called me "hon." But he called everyone hun, so I just took it as "older Brooklyn dude who is certainly harmless." I guess it depends on the context.



    In Georgia at least, all the aforementioned pet names are okay except for "dear." "Dear" is how you know a Southern woman just threw shade at you. Like this:


    My favorite thing to say is "oh how interesting!" AKA WTF?

    "I'm going to have my flower girl carry one of those signs that says last chance to run; isn't that so cute!"

    Oh how interesting!


    Haha, my grandma does this, but instead of interesting, she says, "unique."  So, if I (or more likely my teen sister) show up in a trendy outfit, it's, "Oh, what a unique outfit."  She would never say anything actually mean, so she has to come up with nice ways to throw shade like the good southern lady she is :)

    @knottienumbers I used to get the baby comments as well, although I was a teen, it's just that the baby was my little sister.  It's unbelievable how much judgment came my way, mostly at the mall, but also at the park where other moms would whisper about me.  Like, no this baby is not mine, but even if she were, so what?  People can be such jerks.


    I actually kind of love when old people are super blunt with their opinions. My great-grandmother would always be snarking on something young people were doing or wearing. It made me giggle so much. She was like I just don't understand this stuff. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • missxasiamissxasia Traffic, Atlanta member
    Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    "You're pretty for a dark-skinned girl". I don't get it as much since I moved down south, but back home (in NY), I heard it all the time.

    Also, "Smile!". No! Leave me and my bitchy resting face alone, we obviously don't want to be bothered!
  • littlepeplittlepep South Carolina member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    missxasia said:

    "You're pretty for a dark-skinned girl". I don't get it as much since I moved down south, but back home (in NY), I heard it all the time.

    Also, "Smile!". No! Leave me and my bitchy resting face alone, we obviously don't want to be bothered!

    Ugh. Gross. It's like when people say, "she's pretty for a bigger girl". No. She's just pretty. 

    Saying someone is pretty despite having X feature which you normally find unattractive is not a compliment. It's rude. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • missxasia said:

    "You're pretty for a dark-skinned girl". I don't get it as much since I moved down south, but back home (in NY), I heard it all the time.

    Also, "Smile!". No! Leave me and my bitchy resting face alone, we obviously don't want to be bothered!

    The bolded drives me NUTS.  I don't know why anyone would think that telling someone to smile would make them smile.  It makes me actively frown and probably spew a few choice words at them.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • emmaaa said:

    I've been told that I'm such a pretty ginger, or that I'm actually really hott for a redhead. Thanks?


    Ha! I've got similar ones too. "You know, you actually have really nice hair. I mean, for a ginger, your hair is actually really pretty"

    Wtf??? For a ginger, my hair is pretty. 
    Oh, I've gotten this too. "You're actually pretty, which is lucky because some redheads are fugly", or "It's okay, you can't really see your freckles when you have make-up on", or "I used to think redheads couldn't be hot, but then I saw Lindsay Lohan. So don't worry - there's hope!"

    Don't these people know that ALL REDHEADS ARE SMOKIN' HOT! And don't you dare cross one. We're also all WITCHES!
    emmaaathespeshulestsnowflake
  • missxasiamissxasia Traffic, Atlanta member
    Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    littlepep said:

    missxasia said:

    "You're pretty for a dark-skinned girl". I don't get it as much since I moved down south, but back home (in NY), I heard it all the time.

    Also, "Smile!". No! Leave me and my bitchy resting face alone, we obviously don't want to be bothered!

    Ugh. Gross. It's like when people say, "she's pretty for a bigger girl". No. She's just pretty. 

    Saying someone is pretty despite having X feature which you normally find unattractive is not a compliment. It's rude. 
    Exactly! That's usually my cue to walk the hell away. I'm trying to be as nice as I am online, in the real world... I'd really like to start responding with "Thanks, you're pretty/handsome for an ugly person" but I'm about 97% sure that would be considered "mean".
    mrsdee15 said:

    missxasia said:

    "You're pretty for a dark-skinned girl". I don't get it as much since I moved down south, but back home (in NY), I heard it all the time.

    Also, "Smile!". No! Leave me and my bitchy resting face alone, we obviously don't want to be bothered!

    The bolded drives me NUTS.  I don't know why anyone would think that telling someone to smile would make them smile.  It makes me actively frown and probably spew a few choice words at them.

    Unfortunately, I get this A LOT at work, where I can't answer how I'd like (& coincidentally, my back is to the customers the majority of the time) lol. I usually just say "I was".
    mrsdee15littlepep
  • sophhabobophasophhabobopha The Midwestern tundra member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    My neice has told me (after I put on makeup) "Oh Sophie, you're pretty now!" Bahaha.
    image
    emmaaa
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards