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Child Bride Photoshoot

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Re: Child Bride Photoshoot

  • bethsmilesbethsmiles member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    wrigleyville said:

    I also love that there's pressure about the age. "In 20-25 years..."


    I grew up in a small town that made women feel like spinsters if they weren't married by 25, and the panic definitely set in before I learned to get myself the fuck out of that mindset, so this really enrages me. Not only does your daughter have to get married, she's on a deadline.

    Fuck. That. Shit.
    My hometown was the same way! I get a lot of poor you crap from people because I'm not married yet. I'm only 24 and I've been getting crap about not being married for years.


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  • littlepeplittlepep member
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    edited April 2015
    wrigleyville said:

    I also love that there's pressure about the age. "In 20-25 years..."


    I grew up in a small town that made women feel like spinsters if they weren't married by 25, and the panic definitely set in before I learned to get myself the fuck out of that mindset, so this really enrages me. Not only does your daughter have to get married, she's on a deadline.

    Fuck. That. Shit.
    This pisses me off too. FI and I have been dating for almost 7 years. People used to ALWAYS ask when we were getting married. When we fucking feel like it ok. 

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  • drunkenwitchdrunkenwitch member
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    I just threw up a little bit.

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  • drunkenwitchdrunkenwitch member
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    redheadbride15 said:

    Here's another feel-good little girl photo shoot help neutralize the creepy sexist madness out there:

    http://www.npr.org/blogs/pictureshow/2013/10/26/240899948/mother-and-daughter-play-a-remarkable-game-of-dress-up

    Thank you, I needed that.

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  • littlepeplittlepep member
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    sarahufl said:

    bethsmiles said:

    wrigleyville said:

    I also love that there's pressure about the age. "In 20-25 years..."


    I grew up in a small town that made women feel like spinsters if they weren't married by 25, and the panic definitely set in before I learned to get myself the fuck out of that mindset, so this really enrages me. Not only does your daughter have to get married, she's on a deadline.

    Fuck. That. Shit.
    My hometown was the same way! I get a lot of poor you crap from people because I'm not married yet. I'm only 24 and I've been getting crap about not being married for years.
    My twin sister got married when we were 25. At the wedding, everyone was coming over and rubbing my back saying I would be fine and eventually it would be my turn, too.

    I was like- "bitches, I just moved to Manhattan by myself and I am having a GREAT TIME" I was so excited for HER to get married but in no way felt like I was missing out.

    When I got married at 31, I was ready. And it was great.
    For real. I lived on my own for a long time and *gasp* managed to do just fine. I actually feel more prepared for marriage because I was so independent. You learn a lot about life and yourself living alone. 
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  • drunkenwitchdrunkenwitch member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I almost 40 and still not married. I have:

    Friendships spanning decades becuse I invested my time in building those relationships

    Travel around the US and to in Europe

    Two years in the Peace Corps

    Time to live alone and find out who I am

    Time to live with housemates and learn to get along with all types of people

    Best of all: I have the self confidence and self reliance that comes from doing what I wanted not what was expected.

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  • novella1186novella1186 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    All of my cousins got married at a young age. Every single one of them got divorced. If I had married any of the guys I dated in my early 20s, I'd be divorced too. 

    Not saying that's true for everyone in that age range. But why pressure your daughter to meet some weird arbitrary deadline? Why not encourage her, instead, to love herself, respect herself, have high standards, be happy with her life regardless of relationship status, and wait for the right guy to come along, whether that happens when she's 20 or 50? 

    I remember going to lunch with my mom when I was 24 and she started crying in the restaurant because my college boyfriend had dumped me and I had been single for a while and wasn't dating anyone at all. I started to laugh when I asked her why she was crying and she responded with, "Because you don't have anyone to love and you're all alone!" 
    I said, "I just got my third book published. I just got back from travelling around Europe. I have a dual bachelors degree. I do what I want, when I want. This is the best time in my entire life. I don't need a guy around to put a damper on my fun." 
    She started crying even harder. What about grandchildren and weddings!!!??! 
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  • TrixieJessTrixieJess member
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    wrigleyville said:

    I also love that there's pressure about the age. "In 20-25 years..."


    I grew up in a small town that made women feel like spinsters if they weren't married by 25, and the panic definitely set in before I learned to get myself the fuck out of that mindset, so this really enrages me. Not only does your daughter have to get married, she's on a deadline.

    Fuck. That. Shit.
    I know a girl who had her wedding planned out as a teenager and was adamant that she would be married by 25. So she went out and found herself a groom and had a $100,000 wedding with all the trappings Bridezillaing all over all her bridesmaids in the meantime. 10 years later she is divorced and her ex has custody of their children because she needed to "find" herself.

    Yep, this is what we need to be teaching our little girls...
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  • sophhabobophasophhabobopha member
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  • novella1186novella1186 member
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    flutteringinfl said:

    novella1186 said:

    All of my cousins got married at a young age. Every single one of them got divorced. If I had married any of the guys I dated in my early 20s, I'd be divorced too. 


    Not saying that's true for everyone in that age range. But why pressure your daughter to meet some weird arbitrary deadline? Why not encourage her, instead, to love herself, respect herself, have high standards, be happy with her life regardless of relationship status, and wait for the right guy to come along, whether that happens when she's 20 or 50? 

    I remember going to lunch with my mom when I was 24 and she started crying in the restaurant because my college boyfriend had dumped me and I had been single for a while and wasn't dating anyone at all. I started to laugh when I asked her why she was crying and she responded with, "Because you don't have anyone to love and you're all alone!" 
    I said, "I just got my third book published. I just got back from travelling around Europe. I have a dual bachelors degree. I do what I want, when I want. This is the best time in my entire life. I don't need a guy around to put a damper on my fun." 
    She started crying even harder. What about grandchildren and weddings!!!??! 
    Is this your mother?

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    (Sorry if you're not a Star Trek nerd...)
    This is my mother, to a T: 
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  • princessofgenoviaprincessofgenovia member
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  • huskypuppy14huskypuppy14 member
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    bethsmiles said:

    wrigleyville said:

    I also love that there's pressure about the age. "In 20-25 years..."


    I grew up in a small town that made women feel like spinsters if they weren't married by 25, and the panic definitely set in before I learned to get myself the fuck out of that mindset, so this really enrages me. Not only does your daughter have to get married, she's on a deadline.

    Fuck. That. Shit.
    My hometown was the same way! I get a lot of poor you crap from people because I'm not married yet. I'm only 24 and I've been getting crap about not being married for years.
    My mom was talking to someone random about my wedding last year. I think she said something like, "oh my daughter is getting married in a month", and the rando woman asked how old I was. My Mom said, 31. And the rando said "oh and old bride".

    WTF!
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  • Vivandiere8Vivandiere8 member
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    I have to say even if it is your little girl's dream is to be a bride one day... having a whole paid photo shoot based around this idea is just weird, and over excessive. IT also doesn't seem very wise. I think plenty of little girls like to play bride, and that's fine (grab a camera and take a shoot of the actual moment, messed up hair and all). But there are many girls who grow up with the obsesive idea that their life will not be happy with out marriage, and they panic by certain ages, and some times rush into marriage with the wrong person simply because they want to have their princess day... It just seems dangerous to foster this idea in your little girl that you are having a photo shoot with her because the end goal is the comparison of her in her dress one day when it for sure happens...
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