You guys... (useless thread)

littlepep · April 2015

lolo883 said:

littlepep said:

flutteringinfl said:

littlepep said:
UPDATE FOUND THE CUTEST IDEA EVER.

FI and I want to get a golden retriever puppy when our first kid is a few months old so they can grow up together and be best buddies.
This is brilliant and you will be amazing parents. I loved growing up with pups!
Sorry, I think that sounds like a terrible idea. Babies and puppies are both SO much work, that's a recipe for disaster. It's usually recommended to either get a puppy before having kids so it's trained before the baby turns your world upside down, or getting the puppy after the baby is older/sleeping/potty trained. You don't want to be cleaning up multiple species accidents off the carpet at one time. Plus, people live so much longer than dogs, you could get a puppy when the kid is 3 or 4 and they'd still "grow up together." Lifetime commitment > photo opportunity.

It's definitely a lot of work, but a couple of my friends got a puppy just before they had a baby. It worked out fine, but she works part-time from home so she had more time for training I guess.

princessofgenovia · April 2015

If I have a kid I'm totally gonna end up dressing it up all the fucking time. I think this might be why I should not have kids.

Of course I totally plan on doing the same to my future dog.

Basically if I'm given something small that I'm charge of caring for, it's getting put in a fucking costume.

TrixieJess · April 2015

lolo883 said:

flutteringinfl said:

littlepep said:
UPDATE FOUND THE CUTEST IDEA EVER.

FI and I want to get a golden retriever puppy when our first kid is a few months old so they can grow up together and be best buddies.
This is brilliant and you will be amazing parents. I loved growing up with pups!

Sorry, I think that sounds like a terrible idea. Babies and puppies are both SO much work, that's a recipe for disaster. It's usually recommended to either get a puppy before having kids so it's trained before the baby turns your world upside down, or getting the puppy after the baby is older/sleeping/potty trained. You don't want to be cleaning up multiple species accidents off the carpet at one time. Plus, people live so much longer than dogs, you could get a puppy when the kid is 3 or 4 and they'd still "grow up together." Lifetime commitment > photo opportunity.

I agree with the bolded having had puppies and babies at different parts of my life. My son is 2 and keeps saying he wants a puppy. FI and I tell him, "when you are older". If we decide to get a dog, it will not be a puppy and it won't be until our son is at least 7.

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2015

flutteringinfl said:

lolo883 said:

littlepep said:

flutteringinfl said:

littlepep said:
UPDATE FOUND THE CUTEST IDEA EVER.

FI and I want to get a golden retriever puppy when our first kid is a few months old so they can grow up together and be best buddies.
This is brilliant and you will be amazing parents. I loved growing up with pups!
Sorry, I think that sounds like a terrible idea. Babies and puppies are both SO much work, that's a recipe for disaster. It's usually recommended to either get a puppy before having kids so it's trained before the baby turns your world upside down, or getting the puppy after the baby is older/sleeping/potty trained. You don't want to be cleaning up multiple species accidents off the carpet at one time. Plus, people live so much longer than dogs, you could get a puppy when the kid is 3 or 4 and they'd still "grow up together." Lifetime commitment > photo opportunity.
We wouldn't do it for the photo opportunity. FI grew up with dogs and we've always assumed we'll get a new dog at some point, and he loves golden retrievers. We've gone back at forth about the best time to get a new one, and we would certainly make our decision based on what we know we can handle.

Just think about the varying stages at which they mature. A 1 year old dog is a holy terror, running all over the place. A 1 year old baby is just barely starting to toddle around and get knocked over. A 2 year old dog, still a bundle of energy and needs a lot of attention/exercise. A 2 year old child needs a lot of attention to potty train. A 2 year old puppy is a lot more comparable to a 5 or 6 year old kid, in terms of maturity level. They don't "grow up together" at the same rates.

Plus, goldens only live to be about 12-15 years old. Do you want your kid's best friend to die when they're in middle school, or when they're older?

flutteringinfl · April 2015

I'll add that it's not like our kid's going to be 6 months old and we'll go, "Well now we have to get a puppy! We talked about it!" We're aware that we have no idea what it'll be like to have kids nor what our lives will be like when we have them. But if we're in a position where we feel we could handle the addition, then that's fine. If not, we wait. Just like any other responsibility.

littlepep · April 2015

lolo883 said:

lolo883 said:

littlepep said:

flutteringinfl said:

littlepep said:
UPDATE FOUND THE CUTEST IDEA EVER.

FI and I want to get a golden retriever puppy when our first kid is a few months old so they can grow up together and be best buddies.
This is brilliant and you will be amazing parents. I loved growing up with pups!
Sorry, I think that sounds like a terrible idea. Babies and puppies are both SO much work, that's a recipe for disaster. It's usually recommended to either get a puppy before having kids so it's trained before the baby turns your world upside down, or getting the puppy after the baby is older/sleeping/potty trained. You don't want to be cleaning up multiple species accidents off the carpet at one time. Plus, people live so much longer than dogs, you could get a puppy when the kid is 3 or 4 and they'd still "grow up together." Lifetime commitment > photo opportunity.
We wouldn't do it for the photo opportunity. FI grew up with dogs and we've always assumed we'll get a new dog at some point, and he loves golden retrievers. We've gone back at forth about the best time to get a new one, and we would certainly make our decision based on what we know we can handle.

Just think about the varying stages at which they mature. A 1 year old dog is a holy terror, running all over the place. A 1 year old baby is just barely starting to toddle around and get knocked over. A 2 year old dog, still a bundle of energy and needs a lot of attention/exercise. A 2 year old child needs a lot of attention to potty train. A 2 year old puppy is a lot more comparable to a 5 or 6 year old kid, in terms of maturity level. They don't "grow up together" at the same rates.

Plus, goldens only live to be about 12-15 years old. Do you want your kid's best friend to die when they're in middle school, or when they're older?

UGH Boxes

...............................................................................................

Not to disagree that have a puppy and baby are both lots of work and can be quite hard, but to the bolded I have to disagree. My parents had dogs before they had me and my dog died when I was in middle school. It was hard, but plenty of kids experience the loss of a pet. There's no way to guarantee how long your pet will live. You could get a pet and then it gets hit by a car. There's just no way to plan that.

I currently have cats and realistically, at some point in my child's life, those cats will die. I'm not going to get rid of them now just because that could be hard at some point.

I think you have to decide to get a pet at the point in which you feel like it's the right time for you.

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2015

littlepep said:

Not to disagree that have a puppy and baby are both lots of work and can be quite hard, but to the bolded I have to disagree. My parents had dogs before they had me and my dog died when I was in middle school. It was hard, but plenty of kids experience the loss of a pet. There's no way to guarantee how long your pet will live. You could get a pet and then it gets hit by a car. There's just no way to plan that.

I currently have cats and realistically, at some point in my child's life, those cats will die. I'm not going to get rid of them now just because that could be hard at some point.

I think you have to decide to get a pet at the point in which you feel like it's the right time for you.

Of course they die eventually, but if I was getting a pet specifically for my child to "grow up with" and be best friends with, I would want to ensure that they had the best years together that they could. To me, that means getting the dog when the kid is old enough to remember and enjoy through their whole childhood. The only people who will remember the puppy stage are the parents, who will remember a lot of stress. But getting the dog when the kid is older, they'll both be rough and tumble at the same ages, both want to run around and play catch at the same ages, and then the dog won't really start to age and slow down until the kid is older, staying home to do homework, watch a movie with a date, get their heart broken. Best case scenario (not counting the dog getting hit by a car or other things you can never plan for), getting a puppy at the same time as a baby, the dog's rough and tumble stage is while the baby is still fragile, and you wind up scolding the dog all the time or just otherwise unable to give it the physical attention it craves, and then the dog gets too old to run and play while the kid still wants to, and then dies of old age while the kid is still in the prime of their childhood. That's no good for anyone involved.

thisismynickname2 · April 2015

princessofgenovia said:
If I have a kid I'm totally gonna end up dressing it up all the fucking time. I think this might be why I should not have kids.

Of course I totally plan on doing the same to my future dog.

Basically if I'm given something small that I'm charge of caring for, it's getting put in a fucking costume.

Even though I have the opposite stance on costumes this really made me laugh! (In a good way, not a mean way.)

You know... this one time, a Facebook friend of mine posted a picture of her newborn dressed as a ballerina. The child was posed laying on her back with her arms over her head. She was newborn enough to still be in the ugly phase and not the cute phase, and the pose mimicked what a ballerina would like like standing up straight. It was fucking creepy. A child barely four weeks old with no idea what's going on...If you want her to look like a ballerina, put on a tutu and call it a day. Not like mounting your child on a black board and pin her in place like a bug collector.

KatieinBkln · April 2015

I generally abhor "cute babies dressed up/posed" pictures, but I can dig a mandrake. Like, I'm happy I saw it. Still will never do it.

I'm pretty sure 99% of the photos of any of my future progeny will involve one or more of us blinking, scowling, or sighing at the camera. If my kids are anything like me, most shots of them will be blurred, due to the constant motion (especially around the mouth!).

hellosweetie1015 · April 2015

Yeah, the absolute only reason I like this is because it is a little baby mandrake! I cannot get over how fantastically adorable it is, from my point of view (as a certifiable Potterhead).

I would never ever stick my baby in a pumpkin.

I would totally put it in a Yoda hat though. Or a hat with ears. Or the turtle "costume" I saw posted - I'm down for that. Costume-y clothes? Yep. I'm'a dress my baby up. I should not dress it as a mandrake, but I might. Because it is perfection.

sassyfrass2014 · April 2015

While full-out costumes may be over the top, I can dig a cute baby hat. Like... leafy hats are adorable, bear-ear hats are adorable, give me all the baby hats!

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2015

hellosweetie1015 said:
Yeah, the absolute only reason I like this is because it is a little baby mandrake! I cannot get over how fantastically adorable it is, from my point of view (as a certifiable Potterhead).

I would never ever stick my baby in a pumpkin.

I would totally put it in a Yoda hat though. Or a hat with ears. Or the turtle "costume" I saw posted - I'm down for that. Costume-y clothes? Yep. I'm'a dress my baby up. I should not dress it as a mandrake, but I might. Because it is perfection.

Agreed, when I first saw ugly fake plant leaves coming out of the hat I thought oh good God that's terrible. But being a Mandrake is funny.

littlepep · April 2015

lolo883 said:

littlepep said:

Not to disagree that have a puppy and baby are both lots of work and can be quite hard, but to the bolded I have to disagree. My parents had dogs before they had me and my dog died when I was in middle school. It was hard, but plenty of kids experience the loss of a pet. There's no way to guarantee how long your pet will live. You could get a pet and then it gets hit by a car. There's just no way to plan that.

I currently have cats and realistically, at some point in my child's life, those cats will die. I'm not going to get rid of them now just because that could be hard at some point.

I think you have to decide to get a pet at the point in which you feel like it's the right time for you.
Of course they die eventually, but if I was getting a pet specifically for my child to "grow up with" and be best friends with, I would want to ensure that they had the best years together that they could. To me, that means getting the dog when the kid is old enough to remember and enjoy through their whole childhood. The only people who will remember the puppy stage are the parents, who will remember a lot of stress. But getting the dog when the kid is older, they'll both be rough and tumble at the same ages, both want to run around and play catch at the same ages, and then the dog won't really start to age and slow down until the kid is older, staying home to do homework, watch a movie with a date, get their heart broken. Best case scenario (not counting the dog getting hit by a car or other things you can never plan for), getting a puppy at the same time as a baby, the dog's rough and tumble stage is while the baby is still fragile, and you wind up scolding the dog all the time or just otherwise unable to give it the physical attention it craves, and then the dog gets too old to run and play while the kid still wants to, and then dies of old age while the kid is still in the prime of their childhood. That's no good for anyone involved.

Yeah that makes sense. And TBH I thought my friends were a little crazy when they went out and got a puppy right before they had a baby. It's worked out really well for them as far as training and whatnot, but it's not something I would have done.

I guess it's just hard for me imagine a time when I wouldn't have a pet. We always had a pet growing up so there was never a time when we didn't have a cat or dog or both. I think if something happened to my cats, I'd want a new pet fairly soon, but I suppose if I was pregnant or had small child, I might have a different mindset.

KatieinBkln · April 2015

littlepep said:

lolo883 said:

littlepep said:

Not to disagree that have a puppy and baby are both lots of work and can be quite hard, but to the bolded I have to disagree. My parents had dogs before they had me and my dog died when I was in middle school. It was hard, but plenty of kids experience the loss of a pet. There's no way to guarantee how long your pet will live. You could get a pet and then it gets hit by a car. There's just no way to plan that.

I currently have cats and realistically, at some point in my child's life, those cats will die. I'm not going to get rid of them now just because that could be hard at some point.

I think you have to decide to get a pet at the point in which you feel like it's the right time for you.
Of course they die eventually, but if I was getting a pet specifically for my child to "grow up with" and be best friends with, I would want to ensure that they had the best years together that they could. To me, that means getting the dog when the kid is old enough to remember and enjoy through their whole childhood. The only people who will remember the puppy stage are the parents, who will remember a lot of stress. But getting the dog when the kid is older, they'll both be rough and tumble at the same ages, both want to run around and play catch at the same ages, and then the dog won't really start to age and slow down until the kid is older, staying home to do homework, watch a movie with a date, get their heart broken. Best case scenario (not counting the dog getting hit by a car or other things you can never plan for), getting a puppy at the same time as a baby, the dog's rough and tumble stage is while the baby is still fragile, and you wind up scolding the dog all the time or just otherwise unable to give it the physical attention it craves, and then the dog gets too old to run and play while the kid still wants to, and then dies of old age while the kid is still in the prime of their childhood. That's no good for anyone involved.
Yeah that makes sense. And TBH I thought my friends were a little crazy when they went out and got a puppy right before they had a baby. It's worked out really well for them as far as training and whatnot, but it's not something I would have done.

I guess it's just hard for me imagine a time when I wouldn't have a pet. We always had a pet growing up so there was never a time when we didn't have a cat or dog or both. I think if something happened to my cats, I'd want a new pet fairly soon, but I suppose if I was pregnant or had small child, I might have a different mindset.

I'm really happy that our dog will be on the older side by the time we have kids. Mostly because he was a rescue with some issues that needed to be worked through, but also because he'll be less energetic and demanding, and probably more mellow (if his current trajectory is any indication).

I was DYING for a dog when I was a kid, and my parents made us wait till my youngest sister was 3 (and able to control her body/understand that we treat puppies gently and with respect). They had a golden retriever when my older brother was born, and the dog loved him, but unfortunately he (the dog) died of epilepsy when he was only about 7 and my brother was 2, so I never met him.

I definitely don't think I will have puppy+baby in me at the same time, but I will definitely want to have a "family dog" once they are old enough to participate in its care--I think the responsibility for a live creature that needs you is a wonderful way to teach empathy.

badbnagdway · April 2015

On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.

TrixieJess · April 2015

badbnagdway said:
On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.

This.

We had Rottweilers growing up that we took in from abuse situations. We were older so we were able to walk them and do stuff with them but I remember taking our one dog out for a walk and one mother tried to encourage her very young child to pet our dog. I had to step between them and tell her that wasn't happening. I chastised her for teaching her child to go up to strange animals when they don't know them. She told me that she figured since I was younger and walking the dog (I was 12) it would be okay.

You never know how any animal is going to react to anything. We don't even leave our cat alone in the same room with our son unsupervised.

flutteringinfl · April 2015

These are all good points, guys. Really.

southernbelle0915 · April 2015

flutteringinfl said:
These are all good points, guys. Really.

We thought about doing the same thing y'all are thinking about. It sounded really solid because I'll be home for the first 3 months of the kid's life, so we can do potty training and such.... we built a fence last fall.... we have the whole set up ready to go.

We decided a puppy is not the best option for us. Right now, we're looking into getting an ex-seeing eye dog. Like one that doesn't pass the test for some reason (they're too friendly, too licky, too excited, etc.). Usually, they're 1-2 years old and pretty well trained dogs - just not right for a blind person. Many of the dogs are golden retrievers so it may be something to look into in your area.

flutteringinfl · April 2015

southernbelle0915 said:

flutteringinfl said:
These are all good points, guys. Really.
We thought about doing the same thing y'all are thinking about. It sounded really solid because I'll be home for the first 3 months of the kid's life, so we can do potty training and such.... we built a fence last fall.... we have the whole set up ready to go.

We decided a puppy is not the best option for us. Right now, we're looking into getting an ex-seeing eye dog. Like one that doesn't pass the test for some reason (they're too friendly, too licky, too excited, etc.). Usually, they're 1-2 years old and pretty well trained dogs - just not right for a blind person. Many of the dogs are golden retrievers so it may be something to look into in your area.

I actually had one for a few years when I was a kid (black lab). It was our first dog so I was so excited. Sadly, it didn't work out great for us. She was fine, just never bonded well with anyone and I think had some behavioral issues. The timing was also suuuuper poor. Just a couple years after we got her my parents divorced, and my mom took her and then realized she didn't have the time to take care of her, so we had to re-home her.

No matter what, of course we'll make a decision that we decide is right for us and our family, and of course we'll make sure our child is safe. But I don't see us being a house that never has a dog. FI always had at least a couple when he was growing up, and currently all his siblings and parents have at least one dog in the house.

lovegood90 · April 2015

badbnagdway said:
On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.

To the bolded: very true, and it also goes the other way: "dog-proof" your children, people! Too many times I see toddlers or young children being too rough, or just generally annoying a dog (and you can tell because its trying to pull its face away, etc) and the parents just do nothing because they think it's "cute" and that dogs are invincible. It drives me nuts.

littlepep · April 2015

lovegood90 said:

badbnagdway said:
On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.
To the bolded: very true, and it also goes the other way: "dog-proof" your children, people! Too many times I see toddlers or young children being too rough, or just generally annoying a dog (and you can tell because its trying to pull its face away, etc) and the parents just do nothing because they think it's "cute" and that dogs are invincible. It drives me nuts.

Yeah this is very true. Kids need to learn to ask if they can pet a dog they don't know. My mom's German Shepherds are great with kids, but most people ask if they can pet first. I think it's a good rule for any dog.

levioosa · April 2015

lovegood90 said:

badbnagdway said:
On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.
To the bolded: very true, and it also goes the other way: "dog-proof" your children, people! Too many times I see toddlers or young children being too rough, or just generally annoying a dog (and you can tell because its trying to pull its face away, etc) and the parents just do nothing because they think it's "cute" and that dogs are invincible. It drives me nuts.

I knew a family who thought it was "cute" that their kid liked to go up and hit the dog or poke him. I wasn't much older than the kid myself, but I was absolutely horrified. That is absolutely not the way to treat an animal, and they are so lucky the dog was mild mannered and never snapped at the kid. I was ready to thrash the kid, and I wasn't even the one being provoked. Those people don't deserve pets. I always wanted to take that dog away and give it a real home. She was the sweetest dog ever. They also treated her like a personal puppy mill. She had 11 litters.

It's not that fucking hard to raise your children to treat life with respect and care.

badbnagdway · April 2015

littlepep said:

lovegood90 said:

badbnagdway said:
On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.
To the bolded: very true, and it also goes the other way: "dog-proof" your children, people! Too many times I see toddlers or young children being too rough, or just generally annoying a dog (and you can tell because its trying to pull its face away, etc) and the parents just do nothing because they think it's "cute" and that dogs are invincible. It drives me nuts.
Yeah this is very true. Kids need to learn to ask if they can pet a dog they don't know. My mom's German Shepherds are great with kids, but most people ask if they can pet first. I think it's a good rule for any dog.

All good points. I agree kids need to be taught how to interact properly with animals and I do think that kids being rough (not even intentionally) with dogs is a big cause of biting. We have friends who have a 6 and 8 year old and they have no pets. The parents are clueless and I've seen the kids harass a friend's dog by just never leaving it alone, always trying to get it to play, etc., to the point where I finally stepped in myself and said no more kind of forcefully because the mom is a spineless jellyfish and the dad was off getting drunk. They weren't trying to hurt the dog, they just didn't understand that the dog was done playing. Our older dog turns tail and runs away from them because he's smart

Unfortunately very young kids, like kids under 4, are not likely to be able to fully understand and act with the sufficient discretion, which is why I would suggest working with a dog prior to actually having kids in the house full time.

FiancB · April 2015

lolo883 said:

littlepep said:

flutteringinfl said:

littlepep said:
UPDATE FOUND THE CUTEST IDEA EVER.

FI and I want to get a golden retriever puppy when our first kid is a few months old so they can grow up together and be best buddies.
This is brilliant and you will be amazing parents. I loved growing up with pups!
Sorry, I think that sounds like a terrible idea. Babies and puppies are both SO much work, that's a recipe for disaster. It's usually recommended to either get a puppy before having kids so it's trained before the baby turns your world upside down, or getting the puppy after the baby is older/sleeping/potty trained. You don't want to be cleaning up multiple species accidents off the carpet at one time. Plus, people live so much longer than dogs, you could get a puppy when the kid is 3 or 4 and they'd still "grow up together." Lifetime commitment > photo opportunity.

I would've come fucking unglued if I had puppy at the same time as a baby. We have a Border Collie that is now a year old, but when we got him he was sick all the time and always getting into things and destroying things and having accidents- and he was almost 6 months, not a tiny cute 6-week-old. By the time I pop out a kid he'll be at least 2 and I think that will be perfect- he'll have calmed down a bit, his obedience will be down pat.

Likewise, as a kid I begged for my own dog and my parents didn't let me get one until I was old enough to pretty much take care of her myself. I was 10 and old enough to start 4H where I learned how to train and take care of dogs, I could feed her, walk her, clean up after her, etc. If you have a puppy and baby at the same time, the dog will be pretty dang old by the time the kid's old enough to appreciate it.

I mean it depends partly on the dog, too- obviously a Border Collie is a ton of work compared to, like, a pug. But all puppies are pains in the ass.

TrixieJess · April 2015

badbnagdway said:

lovegood90 said:

badbnagdway said:
On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.
To the bolded: very true, and it also goes the other way: "dog-proof" your children, people! Too many times I see toddlers or young children being too rough, or just generally annoying a dog (and you can tell because its trying to pull its face away, etc) and the parents just do nothing because they think it's "cute" and that dogs are invincible. It drives me nuts.
Yeah this is very true. Kids need to learn to ask if they can pet a dog they don't know. My mom's German Shepherds are great with kids, but most people ask if they can pet first. I think it's a good rule for any dog.

All good points. I agree kids need to be taught how to interact properly with animals and I do think that kids being rough (not even intentionally) with dogs is a big cause of biting. We have friends who have a 6 and 8 year old and they have no pets. The parents are clueless and I've seen the kids harass a friend's dog by just never leaving it alone, always trying to get it to play, etc., to the point where I finally stepped in myself and said no more kind of forcefully because the mom is a spineless jellyfish and the dad was off getting drunk. They weren't trying to hurt the dog, they just didn't understand that the dog was done playing. Our older dog turns tail and runs away from them because he's smart

Unfortunately very young kids, like kids under 4, are not likely to be able to fully understand and act with the sufficient discretion, which is why I would suggest working with a dog prior to actually having kids in the house full time.

It depends on the child. My son is 2 and has been raised with animals. He is very good around other animals and won't go up to strange dogs or cats. He will point and yell, "Doggy" or "Kitty", but won't go after them. He will pet them if we allow him to and is good about it. We don't leave him alone with the animals though. He is always supervised. He has been swatted at by the cat and he stops when the cat has had enough.

It is the parent's responsibility to teach their children how to behave around animals.

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2015

flutteringinfl said:

southernbelle0915 said:

flutteringinfl said:
These are all good points, guys. Really.
We thought about doing the same thing y'all are thinking about. It sounded really solid because I'll be home for the first 3 months of the kid's life, so we can do potty training and such.... we built a fence last fall.... we have the whole set up ready to go.

We decided a puppy is not the best option for us. Right now, we're looking into getting an ex-seeing eye dog. Like one that doesn't pass the test for some reason (they're too friendly, too licky, too excited, etc.). Usually, they're 1-2 years old and pretty well trained dogs - just not right for a blind person. Many of the dogs are golden retrievers so it may be something to look into in your area.
I actually had one for a few years when I was a kid (black lab). It was our first dog so I was so excited. Sadly, it didn't work out great for us. She was fine, just never bonded well with anyone and I think had some behavioral issues. The timing was also suuuuper poor. Just a couple years after we got her my parents divorced, and my mom took her and then realized she didn't have the time to take care of her, so we had to re-home her.
No matter what, of course we'll make a decision that we decide is right for us and our family, and of course we'll make sure our child is safe. But I don't see us being a house that never has a dog. FI always had at least a couple when he was growing up, and currently all his siblings and parents have at least one dog in the house.

Then get the dog first! Our big dog is almost 5 now, and I have no concerns about bringing a baby home with her in the house (little dog is almost 10, and acts more like a cat most of the time). They've both got around another 5-10 years on them, at which point the kid(s) will be old enough to handle a puppy.

Edit: did I fix the boxes?

KatieinBkln · April 2015

levioosa said:

badbnagdway said:
On dogs and kids: babies/children with dog pictures are always adorable. Until they are not. I get super freaked out when I see pictures of toddlers lying next to or on top of a dog. It can happen so quickly that a child gets bitten by a dog, even a sweet, loving family pet. Look at this story of a family golden retriever, who was, without mom realizing it, having ear pain. He snapped and tore up their toddler's face. As the woman who wrote the post notes, it was not the dogs fault, it was ultimately hers.

I'm not saying don't ever have dogs and children, but I agree with others that a puppy and a baby are not a great plan. It's not realistic to say, don't have a dog and kids at the same time, but do at least "child-proof" your dog and try your very best never to leave small children unattended with the dog. Children ages 5-9 are actually the most at risk, so it's actually a lot of years to commitment to careful monitoring for both the child's and dog's sakes to have both at the same time.

I can tell you from recent experience that even our 12 month old foundling dog needs an incredible amount of care as she learns to housebreak and seeks attention. She has met our neighbor's kids and is fine interacting with them on her leash, but I would not trust her lose in a house with young children right now. She is still learning how hard humans can be played with without hurting them.
To the bolded: very true, and it also goes the other way: "dog-proof" your children, people! Too many times I see toddlers or young children being too rough, or just generally annoying a dog (and you can tell because its trying to pull its face away, etc) and the parents just do nothing because they think it's "cute" and that dogs are invincible. It drives me nuts.

I knew a family who thought it was "cute" that their kid liked to go up and hit the dog or poke him. I wasn't much older than the kid myself, but I was absolutely horrified. That is absolutely not the way to treat an animal, and they are so lucky the dog was mild mannered and never snapped at the kid. I was ready to thrash the kid, and I wasn't even the one being provoked. Those people don't deserve pets. I always wanted to take that dog away and give it a real home. She was the sweetest dog ever. They also treated her like a personal puppy mill. She had 11 litters.

It's not that fucking hard to raise your children to treat life with respect and care.

If a kid came up to my dog and did that, he would not only bite, he would no doubt bite to kill. This is why I don't let strange kids run up to him, and why he is never off-leash (he has some doggie-PTSD from his time as a stray, we have gathered. 99% of the time he loves all people, but if he feels cornered/attacked, he will stand up for himself, and not with a growl. He goes straight to kill-or-be-killed mode, whether it makes sense or not).

I am not worried about him when I have children, but that is largely because I know that I will never allow a baby/toddler hang out with him alone, and I'll certainly never let a kid climb on him.

There are probably a lot of dogs who will never bite a kid, who will never snap if you let the kid climb on them. There are dogs like mine, where we know ahead of time that it's a possibility. But there are an unknowable number of dogs who fall somewhere in between. I can't understand the reasoning behind letting your kids be the ones to figure out exactly where a dog's "line" is. Too risky an experiment for me.

madamerwin · April 2015

levioosa said:
I like turtles!

EEEEEEE! I love this! When I have kids, I am knitting them all sorts of animal costumes.

theartistformerlyknownas · April 2015

Back to babies... I'm due in October. This is totally happening.

levioosa · April 2015

lolo883 said:
Back to babies... I'm due in October. This is totally happening.

Omg.

I suddenly regret never truly learning how to knit or crochet.

You guys... (useless thread)

Re: You guys... (useless thread)

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