Pre-wedding Parties

Re: .

  • You're not entitled to a wedding shower so yes, you need to get over it. Lots of people with local friends and family don't have one either because if no one offers, it just doesn't happen.
    kewest88 said:

    I'm stressing. I am getting married this July and everything is running smoothly and I'm so excited, but I don't know how i can possibly have a wedding shower. I live in Texas, I have one bridesmaid in Texas (she is over 6 hours away) and I have some friends spread out throughout the state (between 2 and 5 hours away). Other than them everyone is states away, my MOH is in NC, parents in OK and FL, grandparents in LA, NC and FL, my fiancés family is spread throughout NM, LA, CT, and CA. I know its not an essential part of the wedding but I feel kind of sad at the thought of not having any sort of shower. My bridesmaids and friends have plans to come to TX for my bachelorette/birthday weekend and thats a lot, travel, lodging food, drinks all of that costs so much. I don't want to seem selfish but I feel like I'm missing out. Any advice/help/wake up calls welcome!


    image
    image
  • kewest88 said:

    I'm stressing. I am getting married this July and everything is running smoothly and I'm so excited, but I don't know how i can possibly have a wedding shower. I live in Texas, I have one bridesmaid in Texas (she is over 6 hours away) and I have some friends spread out throughout the state (between 2 and 5 hours away). Other than them everyone is states away, my MOH is in NC, parents in OK and FL, grandparents in LA, NC and FL, my fiancés family is spread throughout NM, LA, CT, and CA. I know its not an essential part of the wedding but I feel kind of sad at the thought of not having any sort of shower. My bridesmaids and friends have plans to come to TX for my bachelorette/birthday weekend and thats a lot, travel, lodging food, drinks all of that costs so much. I don't want to seem selfish but I feel like I'm missing out. Any advice/help/wake up calls welcome!

    You are being selfish, not seeming selfish. You'll still be married without a shower.

    image
  • Lots of people don't have wedding showers. Some don't have them because nobody offers to throw one for them. Others don't have one because they're in similar situations to yours. And obviously, you can't throw one for yourself because it screams gift grab.

    Since you asked for a wake-up call... my advice is this: stop concerning yourself with this. It IS pretty entitled to think you are missing out and to expect that people should give you presents. 
    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • Has anyone offered to throw you a shower?  

  • You're not missing out. Showers (mine and others') are my personal hell, and they're definitely quite boring for a lot of people.

  • No, no one has offered I was just curious what people usually did in these situations. Thanks for the input.
  • I'm one of those brides who won't be getting any pre-wedding parties, as the location of the wedding is in my hometown, 17 hours from where I live, and nearly everyone invited is OOT, a few on the west coast, and the rest on the east coast, and I certainly wouldn't expect them to make more than one trip.

    I'll still be married to my best friend!
  • Showers are not required. We tend to not have showers at all where I am from.

    Also, for a moment, I'm sure you don't mean it, but think about how much money people are spending to actually attend your wedding. It is hard, but many people factor travel into their gift/ shower hosting situations. Its just the nature of having loved ones spread out. I'm sure you wouldn't dare to ask a friend to buy another plane ticket to give you a gift, but that is essentially what a shower invitation is. 

    I'm glad you are taking this in stride, but yes, your disappointment is selfish. Look at what you do have: Friends travelling to give you a bachelorette party- be thankful and gracious. 
  • Yep. Reality call. Chit chat has a First World Problem thread, this is a definite FWP.
    image



    Anniversary
  • Reality check:  You are not entitled to a shower.  Be sad for a day and then move on.  What matters is that you will be married to your FI. 

    It might seem like you are missing out, but a ton of people never have a shower, and that's okay.  No one "deserves" a shower, and it's not a mandatory part of the wedding process.  Don't share your disappointment with anyone, as they might feel guilted into throwing you one when they can neither afford the time, travel, or cost.  Keep looking forward to the future.  It seems like you're going to have a great weekend with your girls, and you're right, it is incredibly expensive, and it would be selfish to expect more.


    image
  • kewest88 said:

    No, no one has offered I was just curious what people usually did in these situations. Thanks for the input.

    What people usually do is they wait to see if someone offers to throw a shower. If so, the bride and the shower host work together to figure out a location that can work. If no one offers to throw a shower, no shower happens.

  • Why the DD?  That's so silly...  people gently gave you the wake up call you requested, and you yourself seemed cool with the responses.  No need to delete :)
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited April 2015
    I came for the bat signal.  How rude!

    My daughter didn't get a bridal shower.  They are not required.  My own shower was a party for my mother and HER friends.  You don't need one.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Back for the DD. You were quoted anyway, so not sure why the delete? It only brings more attention to your post.

    Anyway.

    image
    image



    Anniversary
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards