From the outset, I want to make clear that this story is about plus ones, and not significant others. We went to great lengths to make sure that every single person with a SO was invited with their SO by name, whether they had been together for 8 days or 80 years.
My moms side of the family is pretty small. I have two cousins on her side that I practically grew up with. Like I mentioned, we invited all SOs. These two cousins are not in relationships. They have already booked hotels rooms and everything and suddenly last night I received a call from my mom warning me that my aunt my call because now my two cousins are apparently thinking of boycotting the wedding if we don't let them each being a friend.
We are already at the max number we wanted to invite if we receive 100% yes on RSVPs and I'm not comfortable inviting over that number.
Further, I'm honestly a little hurt about being given an ultimatum. My mom said to tell my aunt that they can bring people if we have some declines even if I have no intention to do that. But I feel uncomfortable even saying that because the single cousins on my dad's side aren't getting plus ones and my FI literally has over 40 first cousins. We had to draw the line at relationships. If we gave everyone who is single a plus one, we probably wouldn't have the space to attend our own wedding! It doesn't seem fair to give them prefential treatment just because they have given an ultimatum. Also, it's not like they will be alone at the wedding. They have each other and they obviously are close with my whole family and would be seated at the family table.
Apparently my aunt wants them to bring friends also, and my mom is worried that she will fight me on this and also might not attend.
My feelings are sort of hurt and I'm trying to be gracious instead of calling them and being like, "your loss. BYE Felicia." If they don't want to come that's obviously fine, but I'm upset about being given an ultimatum and the potential for some serious family drama.
What would you do? Did I do the wrong thing by not giving plus ones?