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Invite bridesmaids to out of town (for them) bridal shower?

chloe97chloe97 member
First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
in Pre-wedding Parties
My 3 bridesmaids are throwing me an amazing out of town bachelorette party. The next weekend my FI's aunt is throwing me a bridal shower. My bridesmaids all live 1.5-4 hours away and I feel bad asking them to spend 2 weekends in a row celebrating me. Also, because we have a small condo and my mom is staying with me, I cannot offer them a place to stay. My FI's aunt is inviting a bunch of my girlfriends to the shower, so it feels weird not to invite them, but I feel bad making them feel as if they need to spend more money to come, stay at a hotel, etc. Should I have FI's aunt invite them? Would it be weird to email them and just stress that they shouldn't feel like they need to come?  
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Re: Invite bridesmaids to out of town (for them) bridal shower?

  • CowgirlK39CowgirlK39 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    My maids were all 4+ hours away. I had two showers (not by choice) and I simply sent them an email telling them what was going on. I said if they could make it, cool. If not, also fine. None of them came but I was totally understanding of their situations. Something like that might work best for you, or send a formal invite and then talk to them personally about it.
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  • SP29SP29 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited May 2015
    I would still invite them- it is their choice if they come or not. 

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  • esstee33esstee33 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited July 2015
    I would invite them and let them make the decision themselves. 
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I would invite them. If I were your bridesmaid, my feelings would be hurt if I didn't get invited to your shower.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • notdoingitbythebooknotdoingitbythebook member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    AddieCake said:

    I would invite them. If I were your bridesmaid, my feelings would be hurt if I didn't get invited to your shower.

    Ditto. You never know, they might be able to come or want to come. Without inviting them they do not get that choice.
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  • erinlin25erinlin25 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    Definitely invite them.  Attendance is always optional, never required so its up to them.  All of my in laws were invited to my shower which was a 4 hr. drive for them-- all but 2 came.  You would be surprised how many people will go out of the way to celebrate you.  You can always give the note so they know they are not obligated since so many people think its "their duty" to be there, but its not necessary.
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