Attire & Accessories Forum

Bridesmaids Dresses (for winter)

We're having a January 2016 wedding. I have a vision of my bridesmaids wearing shorter dresses, vintage tights, cute booties, and potentially a faux wrap of some kind. Think: vintage-winter-storybook.

So, the thing is -- I LOVE lace. But my wedding dress doesn't totally reflect that. Will my bridesmaids look out of place if I go with a lace bridesmaid dress? There is one I like at David's that has lace on top with a flowy bottom.

I guess my question is: How much does the bridesmaid dress need to "match" my wedding dress?

Re: Bridesmaids Dresses (for winter)

  • I don't think it needs to match! Mine sure don't. I'm in a lace dress and my bridesmaids are in chiffon. 

    Anyway, you'll need to supply your bridesmaids with the tights, cute booties, and wrap. Anything besides the dress that you dictate you need to pay for. Including accessories and shoes. 

    Depending on where you live, it might be better to go with a long dress with sleeves. Cap sleeves, elbow length, full sleeves! Nobody wants to wear a shawl all night. How will they dance? If it's snowy and cold as hell, don't make your bridesmaids freeze so you can have a wedding vision!!!


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  • hellohkbhellohkb mod
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited May 2015
    I am also having a January 2016 wedding! My bridesmaids are wearing different black lace dresses. I don't think they (the bridesmaids) need to "match" you or anything. What does your dress look like?

    As long as you're not getting married on the beach somewhere I don't think lace will look too out of place.


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  • How cold is it in January where you live?

    Also, ditto PP that you have to buy all the accessories if you're dictating them. I think booties are hideous and would never voluntarily buy/wear them.
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  • Thanks, everyone!

    I chose short dresses so they could theoretically be worn again. I know they won't wear the long dresses ever again. Also, it will get hot in the reception (dancing, lots of people, etc.), so I think they will appreciate no sleeves.

    I thought most bridesmaids bought their own shoes. That's what I've always done - regardless of style ...
  • RezIpsaRezIpsa member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper

    Thanks, everyone!


    I chose short dresses so they could theoretically be worn again. I know they won't wear the long dresses ever again. Also, it will get hot in the reception (dancing, lots of people, etc.), so I think they will appreciate no sleeves.

    I thought most bridesmaids bought their own shoes. That's what I've always done - regardless of style ...
    Only if the bride isn't dictating specific shoes. If you want them to wear something specific then you have to pay for it.

    While it is nice of you to consider a dress you think they can wear again, that is definitely the rarest of exceptions. I've been a bridesmaid a lot, never worn those dresses again because they weren't things I would choose.
  • I don't think your bridesmaid dresses need to match your dress at all. Whether they match each other depends on your style and the number of bridesmaids. I personally love the mismatched look, for example, but I only have two bridesmaids so I think it will look better if they have identical dresses. (And my dress is a mermaid with huge rosettes on the skirt. My girls will shoot me if I make them match that.)

    If you don't dictate specific ankle boots, I don't think you have to buy them. Some of them might already have boots that will work, and some might have other dress shoes they'd rather wear that you'll agree will be great. And some might want the excuse to buy themselves some new boots. I'd just go with the flow on that. But the tights and wraps, you'll need to buy for them.
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  • I know how you feel with wanting short dresses so they could possibly wear them again... But I actually saw a wedding during the end of October when I was taking my engagement photos and all of the girls were wearing short dresses.  That was the moment I realized that short dresses just don't look right in the late fall/winter.  My bridesmaids were all extremely happy I went with long dresses.  The bridesmaid dresses we chose are from David's bridal and look amazing on the girls. They also have lace top.  

    To be honest, I have two bridesmaid dresses in my closet, one that I thought I could wear again for sure- but I haven't worn them since.  

    This is the bridesmaid dress we went with for our November wedding: 
  • edited May 2015
    I once had to wear a strapless bridesmaid dress in February. It was long and I even wore tights under it. I froze all night, even in the reception hall. 
  • KatWAGKatWAG member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its

    We're having a January 2016 wedding. I have a vision of my bridesmaids wearing shorter dresses, vintage tights, cute booties, and potentially a faux wrap of some kind. Think: vintage-winter-storybook.


    So, the thing is -- I LOVE lace. But my wedding dress doesn't totally reflect that. Will my bridesmaids look out of place if I go with a lace bridesmaid dress? There is one I like at David's that has lace on top with a flowy bottom.

    I guess my question is: How much does the bridesmaid dress need to "match" my wedding dress?
    To the bolded, if you chose this look and require the tights, shoes, wrap, etc. Then you must pay for it.
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  • I'm having a January wedding as well and it's at a ski lodge. I asked my girls if they would prefer long or short dresses, they all wanted long so they are picking whatever style they want in long navy dresses. I assumed they might want some type of sleeve because of the time of year but none of them do, they have all decided on some kind of strapless. 

    I would maybe check with your BMs about how they feel about tights in general. I love tights, I wear them all winter long, but I know a lot of people that hate wearing them and wouldn't feel comfortable. While I like your style you are going for and would probably wear something like this to a wedding myself, it's a look that not everyone will be comfortable in.

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  • KatWAG said:

    We're having a January 2016 wedding. I have a vision of my bridesmaids wearing shorter dresses, vintage tights, cute booties, and potentially a faux wrap of some kind. Think: vintage-winter-storybook.


    So, the thing is -- I LOVE lace. But my wedding dress doesn't totally reflect that. Will my bridesmaids look out of place if I go with a lace bridesmaid dress? There is one I like at David's that has lace on top with a flowy bottom.

    I guess my question is: How much does the bridesmaid dress need to "match" my wedding dress?
    To the bolded, if you chose this look and require the tights, shoes, wrap, etc. Then you must pay for it.
    This. Anything aside from the dress, if you're REQUIRING IT, you have to pay for. If brides made you buy yellow platform sandals before, they were in the wrong. If they said just said "wear something silver" and you bought your own, that's fine.

    Tights and fur shawls you would definitely need to provide them.

    That said though, no, they don't need to "match" your dress. Nothing wrong with a bride in satin and BMs in lace, or whatever.

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  • I was in a December wedding in Ontario. It was effing cold. Our dresses were strapless.  We had Jackets that had 3/4 length sleeves, I froze my ass off. I also had the seamstress sew a warmer liner into my dress and jacket because I knew it would be cold. 

    Please keep the comfort of your BMs in mind and the weather where you are having your wedding. 
  • My wedding was December in NC. Compared to many places, NC has mild weather in December with the risk of a snow "storm" and below freezing temps. My BMs wore floor length chiffon dresses and I bought them an ivory pashmina shawl. Basically everything was inside and heated so the only time we would be outside was for transporting from ceremony to reception. We ended up with a 60 degree day so it wasn't bad at all.

  • SepiaToneSepiaTone member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited May 2015

    KatWAG said:

    We're having a January 2016 wedding. I have a vision of my bridesmaids wearing shorter dresses, vintage tights, cute booties, and potentially a faux wrap of some kind. Think: vintage-winter-storybook.


    So, the thing is -- I LOVE lace. But my wedding dress doesn't totally reflect that. Will my bridesmaids look out of place if I go with a lace bridesmaid dress? There is one I like at David's that has lace on top with a flowy bottom.

    I guess my question is: How much does the bridesmaid dress need to "match" my wedding dress?
    To the bolded, if you chose this look and require the tights, shoes, wrap, etc. Then you must pay for it.
    This. Anything aside from the dress, if you're REQUIRING IT, you have to pay for. If brides made you buy yellow platform sandals before, they were in the wrong. If they said just said "wear something silver" and you bought your own, that's fine.

    Tights and fur shawls you would definitely need to provide them.

    That said though, no, they don't need to "match" your dress. Nothing wrong with a bride in satin and BMs in lace, or whatever.
    If you worry about them matching, you can always add it in a small way. I was a BM in a winter wedding (1st week in February), and the bride opted for a grey velvet gown. My outfit was two pieces, a skirt and a top, with a velvet accent on the top. I'm not sure how to describe it, but it did look decent, and the separates meant I could shorten the skirt and wear it again.

    That said, the two piece ensemble was a requirement, as were colour-matched shoes (the only icky part). The bride paid for the shoes, though.
  • jacques27jacques27 member
    First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited May 2015

    Do not choose dresses based on what you THINK people will wear again.  I have a shorter navy blue bridesmaid dress in my closet that I "can totally wear again!"  Nope.  Not even.  My dress wearing occasions are few and far between and the occasions I would wear a dress, it's actually going to either be a less formal short dress in my style (read: not a David's Bridal bridesmaid dress) or a more formal long dress or a classic LBD.

    The only way to guarantee that they'll wear the dress again is let them pick out any dress they want without regards to matching, and let them wear it.  Choose based on their comfort (truthfully, I would be pissed to have to wear a short sleeveless flowy dress in January - even with tights and a wrap).  Comfort > Vision.  Every. Single. Time.

  • Definitely ask them how they feel, I had assumed that my bridesmaids would rather wear a short dress than a long so that's what I was looking at but when I actually asked I was surprised that they all said they'd prefer long so we're going with a long dress.

    Also even if you let them pick their dresses if it's a strange color they may never wear it again. I had to buy a gold one and i got to choose the style which was awesome but gold looks awful on me. I'm a pale person and it didn't seem to matter what shade I chose I just look bleached out in it so that one is staying in my closet until my next trip to goodwill...
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  • I wouldn't want to wear a short dress with booties in January, regardless of how "cute" or "reusable" the bride thinks they are.
  • They don't need to match, but they should be in the ballpark with the level of formality.  You wouldn't do a grand cathedral wedding with a huge dress and black tie affair, and girls in breezy little cotton sundresses from Old Navy.  Conversely, a casual beach wedding with a bride in a short sunny beachdress would look ridiculous surrounded by bridesmaids in satin ballgowns.
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