Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

Ring bearer GIRL?

We don't know anyone with young sons and only one with a little girl (3YO). Has anyone had a girl as the ring bearer instead of a flower girl? I think it would be precious for a little girl in a poofy dress carrying a pretty pillow with the ring on it. Has anyone done this? 

Is 3 years old too young? Her dad would be the best man, so he might be able to walk her down the aisle if she got scared.

Thoughts?

Re: Ring bearer GIRL?

  • I think this would be very sweet.  Generally 3 is the minimum age for a ring bearer or flower girl. 

  • I think it's great and that 3 is not too young.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • I also think it is great, but three could be too young depending on the kid. If the parent thinks the kid can handle it, go for it. I was totally considering a girl ring bearer myself, and gender had nothing to do with my deciding against it in the end.
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  • I see no reason why a little girl couldn't be a ring bearer.  Three is old enough.
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  • I agree with PPs, 3 is old enough and a little girl as a ring bearer would be so precious.


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  • I think it would be cute. Only thing I would do is have mom seated close to the front and end seat so the little girl can go sit with mom when her part is done or she gets figgity.
  • I love this idea - i think it will be adorable! Please post photos, I would love to see :) 
  • SIL was called the flower girl, but she was really the ring girl. She's a little older (she 7 at the time) but it was fun and she loved her job.

    Girls can carry rings. Boys can throw flowers. No need to force gender norm bullshit on kids.
  • You can do whatever you want - we only had a FG. No ring bearer - I've been to several weddings and they've all had a million FG's and no ring bearer. If you want the ring bearer to be a girl so be it. 
  • fyrchkfyrchk member
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    I was the ring bearer in my aunt's wedding 30 years ago. I carried a pillow and had a wrist corsage. My cousin was the flower girl. A lot of people thought it was cute. We had matching dresses and everything.
  • We are having a girl ring bearer along with our flower girl. I think it is an adorable idea!
  • I know you were asking about a girl instead of a boy (which I think is perfectly ok) but I am answering on the age side of things. 

    We just got married this last weekend and I had my 4 year old nephew as a ring bearer. He is usually NEVER shy however the day of the wedding had a bit of stage fright. he started walking down the aisle and then yelled out "Im going to wait for (insert my now husbands name) to come get me" and went running back out (my nephew loves spending time with my hubby). So my hubby walked back down the aisle, took my nephews hand and walked to the front. I was told that at this point my nephew started waving at everyone and was smiling. 

    It really did break the nervous tension throughout the church as everyone got a good laugh, but just remember that kids may not do exactly what you want them to do and to not put a high expectation on them. Just go with the flow and improvise if need be :)  

  • My sister was ring bearer at my parents wedding.  She was about 1, so she was also carried by one of the groomsmen.  The rings were in one of those toothfairy pillows.  It was cute and important to have all the kids in the wedding, but her entire role was pretty much "look cute and drool on the rings". 
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  • Bigwands said:

    My sister was ring bearer at my parents wedding.  She was about 1, so she was also carried by one of the groomsmen.  The rings were in one of those toothfairy pillows.  It was cute and important to have all the kids in the wedding, but her entire role was pretty much "look cute and drool on the rings". 

    Just having her in photos would have "included" her in the wedding.
  • Jen4948 said:
    My sister was ring bearer at my parents wedding.  She was about 1, so she was also carried by one of the groomsmen.  The rings were in one of those toothfairy pillows.  It was cute and important to have all the kids in the wedding, but her entire role was pretty much "look cute and drool on the rings". 
    Just having her in photos would have "included" her in the wedding.
    Your point?  While this is true, I'm pretty sure they actually wanted their kids IN the wedding. 
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    edited August 2015
    Bigwands said:
    Jen4948 said:
    My sister was ring bearer at my parents wedding.  She was about 1, so she was also carried by one of the groomsmen.  The rings were in one of those toothfairy pillows.  It was cute and important to have all the kids in the wedding, but her entire role was pretty much "look cute and drool on the rings". 
    Just having her in photos would have "included" her in the wedding.
    Your point?  While this is true, I'm pretty sure they actually wanted their kids IN the wedding. 

    Why was it so "cute and important" to drag a baby down the aisle who couldn't understand what "being included" meant or do more than "look cute and drool and the rings" ?  If that's all she could do, why not just have had her in photos and let it go at that?  She'd still have looked cute and been "included" without drooling on the rings (ugh).

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